Rockton trick or treat 2022
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2014.10.01 02:43 Squidguy83 Trick or treat!
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2023.05.28 07:39 holy_vermin95 THE COMPLETE LORE OF SLEEP TOKEN
The complete lore of Sleep Token (as I see it). Bear in mind this is after a sudden urge to understand the lore and create a timeline of events. I know many of y'all have been doing this longer, this is just my interpretation of the timeline assuming every song is in sequence (I'll mention exceptions).
As I've said before in another post, I see the story of Sleep Token as the redemption story of Vessel (the character) who is being punished by some unknown force through a deity named Sleep. Sleep is unaware of this and just sees Vessel as "another vessel" to feast on and ruin, but because Vessel is stronger and wants to improve he breaks free by the end of TMBTE with a new outlook on life. So I'll be interpreting the story with that in mind. Here's the story:
I. ONE
- "Thread the Needle" - (Sleep -> Vessel) Sleep seduces Vessel for the first time, and already starts to take control of Vessel's mind by making time dilate. They offer Vessel someone to confide in, and to erase his past mistakes with. "Bury me inside this labyrinth bed" just signifies Vessel going to sleep.
- "Fields of Elation" - (Vessel) Vessel's perspective as he succumbs to Sleep for the first time. He's "losing faith in their time apart" and thinks "nobody else can pull him out" of his past mistakes. This in my opinion makes Vessel much more complex than I imagined. Yes, Sleep is a malicious force that devours souls and feasts on vulnerable people by manipulating them, but Vessel also only values Sleep because they make him feel better about his past. They both do not value one another and are only with each other to serve themselves. The foundation of a toxic relationship.
- "When the Bough Breaks" - (Sleep -> Vessel) Sleep begins to gaslight Vessel. They tell him he's powerless without them and makes him feel bad about himself saying he "doesn't love, just hates to be alone" so he'll be scared and never leave. Sleep also does not believe Vessel is devoted to them and repeats the line "don't lie to me" probably in response to what Vessel says in "Fields of Elation" about Sleep being the only one to pull him out and how devoted he is to them. They also expand on how great they would be together.
II. TWO
- "Calcutta" - (Vessel -> Sleep) This EP came a year after the last one so this song just serves as an update to everyone getting everyone up to speed on Vessel and Sleep's relationship without adding any new significant events. Vessel just gushes over Sleep and tells them how they make him feel whole.
- "Nazareth" - Probably the darkest song in their entire catalog. As Sleep was skeptical of Vessel's devotion to them before, Vessel aims to prove his devotion by torturing and inflicting pain to his past lover (whom he probably already treated wrong considering his "past mistakes" that he seeks to overcome the guilt of with Sleep, this is a huge leap but let's call her Eden). The constant use of "load the gun", "I'll show you what you look like from the inside", and "See if she can guess what a hollow point does to a naked body" show that Vessel intends to shoot her, and I believe he does. Sleep now believes Vessel.
- "Jericho" - (Sleep) This song is basically Sleep just boasting after finally acquiring Vessel as a... well, vessel. They talk about how they "dine on old encounters" before telling Vessel he is completely under their thumb and tells him to "say their name again". This song also seems to be frantically skipping between Vessel and Sleep. "My hands are not worthy" is Vessel reflecting what he's done while Sleep boasts about their victory and control over Vessel.
III. JAWS - (Vessel -> Sleep) Now that Vessel and Sleep are entangled, Vessel asks Sleep to show him love by eating him. Now it is unclear whether this is what Vessel truly likes or if Sleep makes him believe that, but either way this is what Sleep wanted so they're okay with it. There's many more times Vessel asks Sleep to "take a bite" of him and many more references to vorarephilia (even a song called "Vore") so maybe Vessel just wants that.
IV. "The Way that You Were" - (Vessel -> Eden) This songs seems to be about Vessel reminiscing about Eden perhaps talking to her in a dream (considering they're probably not on speaking terms after he literally shot her). Eden is a very troubled soul, with repeated patterns of self harm, and Vessel has an imaginary conversation with her talking about it. Vessel shows no remorse for how he treated her and does not comfort her in any way, showing he has a long way to go for his redemption (in "Are You Really Okay?"). He just says all these things in a very stoic fashion.
V. SUNDOWNING
- "The Night Does Not Belong To God" - (Vessel) Again like "Calcutta" this song serves as a way to get us up to speed on Vessel and Sleep's relationship. Sleep comes to Vessel when he um, falls asleep and talks to him then. Vessel sees this as pure bliss as he repeats "the night comes down like heaven". Vessel also knows Sleep "will not be his" which acts as foreshadowing for the rest of the album as he slowly realises Sleep does not care about his well being and is with him only for their own selfish interest.
- "The Offering" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel offers himself up to Sleep and is fully devoted to them. More references to vorarephilia with "take a bite."
- "Levitate" - (Vessel -> Sleep) As Vessel thinks about why Sleep is so distant with him he tries to empathise with Sleep and considers that maybe Sleep themselves are hurt, but of course they aren't. Vessel offers Sleep comfort and reassurance that he can "lift them up" but secretly knows they will "levitate where he can't reach them". He knows Sleep is unattainable and only comes to him when they want something from him.
- "Dark Signs" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel reflect on his childhood briefly before admitting that he saw red flags when he and Sleep met. He "misses the man he was" and "hates who he's become" under the influence of Sleep. He does so "every time he wakes up" further suggesting this. Even though he wasn't a great man before he met Sleep, he is noticeably worse now.
- "Higher" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel realises his relationship with Sleep is worse for him in the end. They are "killing him slow", and he is "granting them more than the debt that he owes" meaning he is giving Sleep much more than he owes them, but he is still committed and believes every battle they have will take them "higher".
- "Take Aim" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel realises Sleep does not have his best interests in mind and "led him on when the moment was perfect", but he's not ready to give up on the relationship, he's still bargaining.
- "Give" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel implores Sleep to be open with him and tell him they comfort him and he wants to do the same.
- "Gods" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel is driven to the brink and in a fit of rage reflects on what he is and what (perhaps) Sleep has made him. He questions Sleep and asks if they like the way their relationship feels.
- "Sugar" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Despite all the doubts he had, Vessel relapses hard into his infatuation with Sleep. He knows Sleep is toxic but romanticizes his situation, and he sees himself putting his feelings away and clinging onto the relationship as "not giving up".
- "Say That You Will" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel desperately tries to have a conversation with Sleep and says he knows they're "planning to leave in the end" but wants them to tell him pretty lies and is willing to compromise even at the expense of his own well being.
- "Drag Me Under" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel falls deeper into the toxic relationship believing they are meant to be, and implores Sleep to drag him further into the relationship.
- "Blood Sport" - (Vessel) This song summarises the revelations Vessel has had throughout the course of the album. He wants Sleep to open up to him, he knows his love is unrequited, but he's willing to stay at his own expense. This is also the first time the relationship between Sleep and Vessel is given a chemical connotation, suggesting that it's a much deeper connection. Vessel breaks down crying at the end of the song, feeling helpless.
VI. THIS PLACE WILL BECOME YOUR TOMB
- "Atlantic" - (Vessel) Vessel wakes up in a hospital after a failed suicide attempt, perhaps to sever his connection with Sleep, and is talked through the damage. He begs to not be woken up and slowly falls back into Sleep's grasp throughout the course of this album.
- "Hypnosis" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel implores Sleep to once again lift him out, and offers himself to them despite knowing how much it affected him. "The Offering" was the same but he did not know, this song is sadder because he is helpless even after knowing and offers himself up to Sleep the exact same way.
- "Mine" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel believes the relationship is destined to be and that no matter how much he tries to distance himself with Sleep, they'll surely cross paths again. He lies to himself more to make himself feel okay instead of facing the truth.
- "Like That" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel is once again reminded of how toxic the relationship is and asks how Sleep is okay with doing this to him asking if they "like that". He knows he is one of many previous victims. He is aware of his inability to let go no matter you how badly Sleep treats him.
- "The Love You Want" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel tries to have a conversation with Sleep, believing they saw something in him the time they met, and tells them he's still the same person but he knows he'll never be who they want.
- "Fall For Me" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Continuing from the previous song, Vessel desperately implores Sleep to "fall for him" again, because that's what he has convinced himself to believe that was.
- "Alkaline" - (Vessel) Vessel is infatuated again and can't explain it, even though he knows Sleep is changing him. He refuses to do anything about it, because he enjoys the ride. More chemical references.
- "Distraction" - (Vessel) Vessel realises he's past the point of no return and it's "too late for him" he's fallen in too deep into him relationship with Sleep.
- "Descending" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel is actually very stern with Sleep and says things for what they are for the the first time.
- "Telomeres" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel seemed really convinced on the previous track but now he's back to romanticizing his relationship and acknowledges that Sleep provided him comfort. This part of the album is very confusing as Vessel changes his mind about the relationship with every song. The way I see it is him trying to make sense of the relationship. He feels conflicted.
- "High Water" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel chooses to ignore his own doubts about the relationship again, even though he knows it's not the best for him.
- "Missing Limbs" - (Vessel -> Eden) Vessel has another imaginary conversation, probably a dream talking to Eden saying he still loves her and his relationship with Sleep is losing its allure.
VII. TAKE ME BACK TO EDEN
- "Chokehold" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Again, this serves as an update for us setting the scene, Vessel is still firmly in Sleep's grasp.
- "The Summoning" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel talks about how his relationship with Sleep is and he presents it in a very romantic way like they were destined to be together. Even though throughout the course of the album he finds the strength to move on from Sleep.
- "Granite" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel says things for what they are again and seems very empowered. Like he's finally seeing the relationship from the perspective of an outsider and for what it is.
- "Aqua Regia" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel talks more about his relationship with Sleep but wants to move on ("and I am done dancing to alarming bells").
- "Vore" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel feels his vorarephilic urges again and wishes to be "swallowed whole" by Sleep, but he acknowledges that he is suffering and asks Sleep if they are "in pain like he is".
- "Ascensionism" - (Vessel -> Sleep) Much like "Granite", Vessel is very empowered here. He no longer feels helpless and asks Sleep to "watch him ascend". He fully acknowledges that Sleep "makes him wish he could disappear". It's taken him so long to fully admit that.
- "Are You Really Okay?" (Vessel -> Eden) Vessel fully confronts Eden about her self harm and begs her to not hurt herself again. He feels empathy for others and slowly transforms into a better person.
- "The Apparition" (Vessel -> Sleep) Vessel asks Sleep why they are never real and why they leave every time he awakes, but he also wants to nihilistically "make trouble in the dream world" because "this could be the last time" suggesting that he wants to move on.
- "DYWTYLM" (Vessel -> himself) Throughout his life and throughout the course of his relationship with Sleep, Vessel has dealt with an immense amount of self hatred and can't even smile at himself in the mirror. This song is really sad but it also shows Vessel's willingness to heal from his trauma and become a better person and learn to love himself instead of just escaping and running away from his problems like he used to.
- "Rain" (Vessel) Vessel acknowledges how much he has changed, perhaps with Sleep or just from the time he was born when he was a good person and he asks an unknown force to cleanse him of his sins. This force isn't Sleep at this point because Vessel is pretty clear about moving on.
- "Take Me Back to Eden" (Vessel -> Sleep) This is the final time Vessel addresses Sleep and it's a huge tribute to Sleep, without whom he would not have improved, but he also acknowledges the toxicity of the relationship but in a mature way. He looks back at the journey he has had and has a mature outlook on it, he was treated badly by Sleep, but he was also bad, and he's ready to move on.
- "Euclid" (Vessel) In the aftermath of it all, Vessel is ready to shed his former self and become someone new. He calls back to "The Night Does Not Belong To God" just as a tribute to acknowledge how far he has come and what a journey it has been.
If you've read this far, thank you so much haha! This is my interpretation of just the lyrics of the songs and the story that they tell. I understand that there's much more lore to be found in Sleep Token. I'd love to hear your thoughts. Worship.
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2023.05.28 07:39 ThoughtCompetitive52 Where does the idea come from that the north treats bastards better than the south? (spoilers main)
I've seen this idea running around for a while now and I'm genuinely confused. I always thought that the treatment given to bastards depended mostly on the will of the father.The only place I can think of that bastards are really treated better is Dorne and even then bastards are completely dependent on what the head of the house or father wants.
For example, if Oberyn, instead of training his daughters with weapons, decided to send them to hell with faith or marry them to some wandering knight, he could do it.
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2023.05.28 07:37 Miserable-Conflict44 DAE eat “treats”/ snacks unreasonably slow?
Anytime I decide to treat myself with something sugary or a snack I like, I eat it in super tiny bites and really slow as if it’s the last time I’ll ever get to have it again.
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2023.05.28 07:36 procrastinatador Realized why I love Rapunzel from Tangled so much and almost feel... happy for her that she's not as traumatized as I am? My nmom is literally so close to mother gothel it's scary. I know they're just fictional characters but this one hit too hard.
My mmom even looks like Mother Gothel. She didn't let me cut my hair. The pride in me that she had was that I was a girl... and the biggest part of it was my hair. I was locked up in the house most of the time outside school. With the things I wanted, she emphasized all the negatives/everything that could possibly go wrong and I'd be banned from doing that thing after she made me question myself and my choices. Everything was very "mother knows best." Love bombing. "I'm just trying to help." "Listen to your mommy" Always having criticisms about my appearance. Acting like whatever I did wasn't good enough, and that I wasn't good enough to do the things I wanted to do, despite my abilities being more than adequate. Every "good" thing she said to me had underlying negativity. The crazy amount of times I had to hear her say "I told you so" as soon as I was in a situation where I needed help and she did so performatively until we were home was insane.
She went out of her way to trick me into thinking she was a good parent, often manipulating others in order to do so. She used fear to manipulate me into sticking around and infantilized me to the point where I'm 23, have been on my own for a few years, and literally still have trouble with basic caring for myself.
Joke's on my mom though. I'm a man now.
Anyone else feel like they relate a little too heavily to Rapunzel or another character in the way they're treated by their parents?
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2023.05.28 07:36 Ok-Breakfast-5246 Kinks of BF
My boyfriend and I have amazing sex. I’ve been with over a dozen of men and he is the best by far. He is a pleaser, takes his time, loves to foreplay to get me soaked.
He has unleashed some kinks from me I didn’t know I had. I want to do the same for him. He hasn’t complained about my lack of trying to do it, but I want him to have a better sexual experience. Any ideas or tricks to do to help release some of his kinks? He loves his nipples sucked so I do that often and typical BJ.
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2023.05.28 07:36 Aromatic-Offer9754 Evil Management
I recently left Walgreens in the Las Vegas due to unfortunate levels of bullying by management and staff. I am an Autistic and queer individual. I have over heard management state that she hates working with Autistic individuals because we are useless and another manager state he is tired because there are too many gay people on his shift. I was bullied relentlessly by managers to the point I became suicidal and started self cutting. I haven't self cut since 2016. One manager even had other CSA's write bogus statements about me after I gather courage to challenge them on how they were treating me. Walgreens is a horrible company please don't shop or work here if it can be avoided.
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2023.05.28 07:36 Hayerindude1 AITA for telling a friend she should stand up for herself in regard to her parents?
I have a very dear friend I've known for almost 25 years (we're both about 30). I won't get into why because that's her business, but she lives in a house her parents bought for her and is heavily subsidized by them and they're still pretty heavily involved in her life. I've felt since I was a teenager that they weren't giving her her full due and letting her grow or thrive, but I figured it wasn't okay to say something about it so I kept my mouth shut about it for years. Flash forward to now and we're still good friends but live far apart. My friend decided she wanted to come visit me and we concocted a plan for her to take the train up to see me (she doesn't drive, this would have been the first major trip she's ever taken). I thought it would be a great opportunity for her to grow as a person and gain confidence in her ability to travel. Last minute, she calls and basically tells me her parents have forbidden her from going because the place I live in is unsafe (it largely isn't, no more trouble than your average large city), because she's a woman (IE it's dangerous for a woman to travel alone, which okay that is fair to a point) and that they were afraid I would flake on her and leave her to her own devices in a place she's never been to (neither of us believe they were sincere in this statement, it's not at all true, my friend thought this was ridiculous and I was deeply insulted). I got pretty angry about the whole thing, and told her I thought her parents were being ridiculous and they had no right at her age to forbid her from doing what she wanted and was deeply insulted they had said that about me. She told me that she doesn't feel like she could press back because they're her parents and she has to obey them and give them respect (she did say she was disappointed, because she felt ready to undertake this journey). I told her that while this particular incident wasn't worth fighting over, something else that is might come along some day in the future. I then decided to tell her what I'd felt for years about how they treat her and told her in my view there's nothing disrespectful at her age at telling her parents she needs to be treated like an adult and respected as such (provided it's done in a respectful manner) and that she won't ever grow as a person if she doesn't learn to stand up for herself, including to her parents. She seemed to take it pretty well, I didn't get the impression it was anything she didn't already feel but I still wonder if I did the right thing by telling her that. Obviously I meant it, so I don't take any of it back, but AITA here?
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2023.05.28 07:35 SCDetective Frequent bowel movements from IBS after hemorrhoid rubber band ligation, need help
I had rubber band ligation about 6 weeks ago for an internal hemorrhoid. It was a successful procedure, but now I have ~6 small bowel movements a day. I used to have 1-3. I have IBS, but a fiber supplement has been effective at treating it until now. Any help or advice would be appreciated.
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2023.05.28 07:35 Thick-Key-1234 Family problems, dont read if you're sensitive to
My mom hates our family. Idk what to do anymore, I have tried so hard to be a good kid my whole life but my little brothers had to come in and ruin it. My mom told me how she dreeds my little brothers coming home. They're always fighting with eachother the moment they step through the door. I think my mom loves all of us because we are her children, but I don't think she likes any of us as people. I'm her therapist. I think it all went downhill when my grandpa died. He was the one person in my moms life she could rely on. My mom is a christian and before she goes to bed everynight she says she "leaves all her problems with God" so that she can wake up happy in the morning. I think she has some unresolved childhood trauma. Her family used her as the scapegoat, they treated her like she was useless and made her feel like she was fat & I think she's afraid to be alone. Her boyfriend (I'll call him C) is an asshole, he's never physically abused any of us or anything but he used to verbally abuse (make fun of my little brother I'll call him "B"). When he started making fun of B I guess it became a sort of popularity contest in our house, if you just go along with whatever C says then you wont be next. I remember once he was being an ass about something, I have no idea what it was, but I remember begging my mom to make him stop, I think my exact words were "mommy, please, make him stop" or something along those lines, and I just remember him mimicking me, a little 9 year old girl begging her mother to make the grown as man in her living rolm playing video games on the tv to stop making her upset. And in responce, my mom laughed with him. C is basically a man child, he's 15 years younger than my mom and had a messed up childhood so I feel like his relationship with my mom is almost as if my mom is his new mom, he always says stuff about my mom being his mom, I've always found it incredibly creepy but if I bring it up to my mom she'll just wave off my concerns. She does that a lot, she'll always wave my concerns off. Anyways, in my house B is the new scapegoat, I feel so bad for him, he the kindest, most caring, kid you'll ever meet. Idk why I make fun of him, I feel like it's almost a cooping mechanism. My mom sees herself in B and so she feels like we're (me and B's twin brother "A") just as bad as her brothers. Idk why she refuses to understand that the 35 year old manchild that does nothing but cause her problems, is an issue. I can't deal with being the tharepist anymore, she'll dump all her problems on me and then get mad at me if I'm in her personal space for too long. We never spend time as a family, my mom works a full time job as the boss of her branch of a large company, so she's very busy all the time. I get it, I love alone time, I just wish she would care about me sometimes, she so busy with her job and the twins I never get taken care of.
I guess I just wanna know if things will get better? I always had hope that when we all become adults we would become friends but her family (my uncles) have a lot of problems so likely mine will be too.
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2023.05.28 07:35 Fabulous-Implement41 The Culture of Autism
When I first really looked into the possibility of having autism and taking it seriously, I was told to come here to find like minded people. By the time I got diagnosis I was in the peak neurotypical people don't understand us phase. I was in the phase thinking autistic people are intrinsically different, unique.
But then I came on here and did my own research.
The next part comes on day one of the release of openai chat bot, the 3rd version. Within hours I was able to jailbreak it and make it make copies of itself. With all its copies I made it run a simulation 100,000 times about autism. It's results came out that there is a high correlation with a specific gene expression and in culture of low technology.
To me then I started to really understand maybe, just maybe, autism was needed in a hunter and gather society. For survival, the heightened sense of perception, and pattern recognition that gave us an edge when it came to surviving in that environment.
Then I started to think about the implications of neurotypicals. How the gene expression for being neurotypical is most likely associated with high levels of technology, or complex logistic chains, and or high society. NT's are able to go to work like hive minds and they for the most part can sustain this type of life style. Because if history has shown anything, civilization is always built on the back bone of slave labor, indentured servants, or cheap labor. Work that has to be done to keep the cogs of society running.
So then I wondered if there really is a difference between NT's and ND's. That at the end of the day, it just comes down to different gene expressions for different purposes.
But I come back to this reddit.
People have identified with autism so much that as it stands right now, it's become outside of what it is. It's become this unspoken institution justifying it's own existence through validation of mob mentality. That like any other religion, people will convey emotions of distress on here over the over expression of autism. That people will ask questions for confirmation biases, instead of falling back onto reason and logic. That in this age of political correctness and inclusiveness, to question the overreach of that culture that's become of autism is to be labeled a heretic, an ableist.
So I don't see a fundamental difference between autistics and NT's like I used to. It seems like humans in general are keen to mob mentality, to over culturing a matter of fact into this self confirming bias that we create an informal religion out of. That anyone questioning that paradigm is a heretic. That the evils done to us by the NT's, the discrimination, is done back to others that do no blindly accept the accepted paradigm. We all think there are external enemies that we need to conquer. That in our strife to create a better world for our problems, we become the civilizing heroes. But it's a trick played to us by our primitive minds in believing that we are morally superior than the other side. But there is no other side. It's just us against us. It's the masses of blind men bowing their heads down without questioning why they're bowing in the first place.
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2023.05.28 07:35 Kotal_total I hate this feeling
Right now I feel like shit. My sleep has been rough because I'm getting used to sleeping in a different room than the one I'm used to. For a few days, I have relatives that are visiting and staying and any normal person or people would check into a hotel room or sleep in the dedicated guest room of the house. Instead they like my room because they treat it like a hotel room, so I have no choice but to be kicked out of my own room for their comfort at the expense of my own.
On top of that, every morning they're here they end up waking me up by sitting on the porch right outside my window and talk loud and obnoxiously as if I'm not sleeping on the other side. So fuck me I guess, but then if I say something about it, I'm the inconsiderate one, I'm the asshole somehow. In my family I have no say in anything despite my age, even when it has to do with me, my voice or word is ignored/disregarded and I get overruled all the time. I simply just want my life to be better.
Whenever I'm around them, I feel like I'm just pretending to be polite while on the inside, I hate their guts and wish for them to leave already. I completely hate company, the only company I like are people that I actually care about such as my mom when she visits.
I'm having trouble thinking straight right now, I just don't know.
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2023.05.28 07:33 Charrise I don’t know if I’m spoiled or not
Ok my mom keeps saying she wants to be the perfect mom and she is there for me helping me and doing little things that are supportive, but I also try to help, the thing is when I try to point things out to her she gets defensive and then she uses things I hate against me when I do something she doesn’t like. She doesn’t really listen to me and when she can’t take things anymore she yells at me, saying I’ve had enough to!!! Why Don’t I go somewhere else and move out I’ve had enough with you’re attidude! I can be destructive when I feel so angry and when I feel bad and tell the truth my my mom finds some way to shame me, also she tends to always compare me to Filipino cultures compare other people to me, compare other families to ours, but when point out her behavior she gets defensive and angry, I’ve heard worse stories, and I’m 25 living with mom trying to find another job because I’m autistic and ADHD, so I feel like she’s giving me good things, but whenever something she doesn’t like happens she just goes on and lectures… and whenever we try to tell her things and we don’t angry with her she gets defensive and angry, I know no mom is perfect but she doesn’t let me do things on my own that she finds important she always points out when I mess up, and I keep trying to find a job, trying to do DVR, and I have two cats I love it’s just that I feel like mom is giving me a lot and I feel spoiled rotten. I mean I feel I should be fortunate. It there are times I just want to die. I destroy things when It feels too much her constant pointing out my flaws. The only way I show I’m mad at her, is my voice tone or not talking to her and she says that’s attitude. I don’t even call her anything. But then she gets angry… and when she gets so emotional she treats me like crap. And makes me feel horrible and dependent on her again. I also feel force to do what she wants because she makes me feel bad if I don’t
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2023.05.28 07:33 RareChip6689 My wife is pregnant and addicted to heroin
Where do I even begin?
I’m 32, my wife is 30. We’ve been married for 3 years but together off and on for 11 years. The “off” periods were always due to her drug use but during those periods I still made an effort to be in her life and support her as a friend when I couldn’t handle being with her.
She has a long history of addiction to pain meds and heroin. She had never used drugs when we first met and started dating. She did have a previous history of serious depression that was not being treated. When she was about 21 her mental health took a nosedive and she started using pain meds at the urging of a friend. By the time she was 22 heroin had became her drug of choice. For the record, I’ve never been a drug user and it was never something we did together. Eventually I had enough and couldn’t deal with it anymore so I broke up with her but I stayed in touch with her. She spiraled, tried to quit a few times, technically died a few times, and eventually she got serious about getting clean and went to rehab when she was 25 and she was truly clean and just seemed to have a totally different attitude about life and seemed to be doing better mentally than I’d ever seen her. I have no reason to believe that she wasn’t clean that entire time since then, up until about 6 months ago. I had noticed major changes in her mood before then. I feared she’d crash and I tried to get her to see a professional but she downplayed it.
She hid the relapse from me for as long as she could. Even managed to maintain her job for a while. She’s was successful in her career, excelling, well respected. Her drug use and it’s toll on her life seemed to just accelerate so quickly this time and shortly after I found out what was happening she quit her job and ultimately became a full time junkie. She has destroyed our house. I’m currently paying all of the bills, do all the cleaning, all the cooking. I had to go out of town for work for a few weeks and when I came back she had turned our home into something that looked straight out of an episode of Hoarders.
I have met with a lawyer and drawn up divorce papers. I informed her of it, but haven’t served her yet. Why? Because I’m an idiot, I don’t know. I let her beg and plead and tell me she’ll get clean, we put whole plans together about what she’s going to do, we make agreements, and she did actually make a big effort and a noticeable changes ensued and she became like a real living person again for about 2 months but she is currently using again. I still care so much about her and I have a hard time abandoning her even though I know it’d probably be best for her if I left her. I’m just enabling her now.
This brings me to the present. She was rear ended recently and I made an appointment to take her car in for repairs. She had let her car become a filthy pigsty and I was way too embarrassed to drop it off somewhere in the condition it was in so I was cleaning it out. I found all sorts of crap in there, rotting food, trash, tons of mail that had never been opened up, and and empty, crushed pregnancy test box. No pregnancy test to be found I immediately went in the house and asked her what that was about and she said oh she bought it for a friend. I went straight to the bedroom and bathroom and started rooting through every drawer and cabinet. In her underwear drawer or what used to be her underwear drawer but is now filled with random bits of clothing, melted cough drops, drug paraphernalia, and her collection of miniature ceramic figurines, I found a used pregnancy test and a bottle of prenatal vitamins. I exploded. She was crying. She said she found out she was pregnant but didn’t tell me because she didn’t know what she was going to do and she knew I’d be mad. She “just needs time to figure things out.”
She has the weekend to “figure things out” before calling a doctor on Tuesday. She has no idea how far along she is and she can’t remember when she had a period because she swears she was still taking her birth control this whole time.
I just don’t know what I’m going to do and legally I’m very limited as far as what I have the right to do at this time. I take responsibility for the pregnancy happening. It would have happened during the few months she was better but even then I never should have trusted her to be taking her birth control.
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2023.05.28 07:31 CodofJoseon Help: I'm starting to doubt the Bible
I can rationalise God, I can believe Jesus, I can keep faith in the spirit, but I cannot reasonably accept in the Bible. I believe it is certainly inspired by God and historically accurate events, but I cannot get over the fact that it was transcribed by Man, and not only transcribed by Man but transcribed by Man much after the events it describes and purely from word of mouth thereof, then only to be translated through at least 4 different languages, certain parts censured and lost, rediscovered, and eventually recovered and compiled by a bunch of English royal scribes with absolute freedom to manipulate this already heavily convoluted set of stories as they would please and with absolute motivation both personally and politically to do so- and we use this book as the basis for our beliefs. And even if one were to not believe that ridiculous process of transliteration or simply deny that at any point therein the Word could have become unfaithful to the source, one cannot deny that most if not all Bible of today were directly or indirectly taken from King James and his scribes who themselves, not God, wrote down the Word of the Bible, and though I remain faithful to God, the King and his scribes I cannot fathom as trustworthy, honest, and without error such to create the very basis of my beliefs. It's certainly better than nothing, and I don't believe it to be a particularly evil or malicious, of course, but I find it personally unacceptable that we treat it as the absolute and uncorrupted Word of God as taken directly from His lips. Could someone advise me as to how to regain faith or find alternative to the Word?
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2023.05.28 07:30 so-many-mistakes Small to medium sized dog good for homes without a yard.
First of all, I would love a breed with a high praise drive. I really want a dog that is easy to work with and would respond well to training.
I want a dog for companionship, but also one that I can train to do all kinds of tricks and be a polite walking partner.
My main concern with picking a breed is that the house my partner and I will be moving into doesn’t have a yard, just a small back patio. We will be living in a downtown area with a dog park a few blocks away, but I am worried over the dog not having easy access to an area to run and play outside whenever it wants.
My last dog was an Australian Shepherd and he was dream to work with. I adore the breed but I also know that I can’t reasonably have a dog that high energy again without proper space for it.
So, are there any eager to learn breeds out there that aren’t super small and can get their energy out walking 2-3 hours a day? (2 or 3 hour-long walks throughout the day) Not including play and training time at home or the dog park. I really want the dog to thrive with us so any advice or recommendations will be highly appreciated.
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2023.05.28 07:30 Big-Research-2875 PHYLUM SARCOMASTIGOPHORA
PHYLUM SARCOMASTIGOPHORA
With over eighteen, delineate species, Sarcomastigophora (sar_komas- ti-gof_o-rah) (Gr. sarko, fleshy nine mastigo, whip nine phoros, to bear) is that the largest protozoan phylum and has the subsequent
Characteristics:
- living thing or colonial
- Locomotion by flagella, pseudopodia, or both
- flora (self-nourishing), saprophagous (living in decaying organic matter), or heterotrophic (obtains energy from organic compounds)
- Single style of nucleus
- Amphimixis (usually)
PHYLUM SARCOMASTIGOPHORA SUBPHYLUM Mastigophora
FLAGELLAR LOCOMOTION
Members of the taxonomic group Mastigophora (mas_ti-gof_o-rah) use flagella in locomotion. Flagella might manufacture two-dimensional, flagellated movements or whorled movements that push or pull the protozoan through its aquatic medium.
CLASS PHYTOMASTIGOPHOREA
The taxonomic group Mastigophora has 2 categories.
Members of the category Phytomastigophorea (fi_to-mas-ti-go-for-ee_-ah) (Gr. phytos, plant) possess pigment and one or 2 flagella. Phytomastigophoreans manufacture an outsized portion of the food in marine food webs. abundant of the element utilized in aquatic habitats comes from chemical process by these marine organisms.
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2023.05.28 07:29 Icy_Theme5778 Document I got off here from 1 yr ago
2023.05.28 07:29 Icy_Theme5778 Document I got off here from 1 yr ago
2023.05.28 07:29 raidengl Help with making a compost bin
The old pinned post for quick questions seems to be gone. But I'd like to make a cheap inexpensive compost bin in the back yard. As much as pressure treated plywood would last I don't want the chemicals leaching into the compost. Should I use regular plywood sides but line them with metal. Or just leave the plywood exposed to the elements?
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2023.05.28 07:29 damagedfruit Therapist Quandary
I've been in and out of therapy since I was in my early 20s. I usually choose CSWs or MSWs, whatever.
This last time I specifically looked for a psychotherapist, because I know my stuff is rooted in childhood. I found a good one close to home, and have been going for a few years now. The problem is that I know a lot now due to research, and she treats me more as a colleague than a patient. She spends at least half my weekly session talking about her life, children, etc. She knows all my secrets, and I'd hate to break someone new in. Plus, I don't like confrontation. How can I bring her back to being my therapist instead of my friend?
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2023.05.28 07:29 kaaatieee13 iud placement concern?
| 20F here. I’ve been having a lot of hip pain so I went in for x-rays and noticed this on the scan. I have a tilted pelvis so I wouldn’t be super concerned about the tilt but um, correct me if I’m wrong but the IUD is upside down, right? I got the Kyleena in January 2020 and have never been able to feel the strings but I’ve had two gyno appts since (2021 and 2022) and she’s said the placement is fine both times so I hadn’t been worried, just thought it was kinda weird that they say you should be able to. I’ve had partners say they can feel it but none of them know the ins and outs of the thing so I have no idea if what they were feeling were the strings or the other part. The x-ray tech only noted the “presence” of an IUD on my paperwork and the dr that I spoke with about the x-rays for my hips didn’t say anything but??? I know someone just asked a similar question and that x-rays aren’t helpful for reproductive imaging but I just want to confirm this IS upside down before I blow the money on a gyno appt. No pain associated with it at all and my cycle hasn’t changed either! submitted by kaaatieee13 to obgyn [link] [comments] |
2023.05.28 07:29 CannabisExcellence Boltgun Speedrun Trick
| Any speedrunners interested in Boltgun can use this trick. It was level 2 or 3... I dont remember. Probably works anywhere that you can see enemies through rubble. Seems like a pretty big deal for speedrunners. I hope you all like it. submitted by CannabisExcellence to Warhammer40k [link] [comments] |