Men's middle part haircut
malehairadvice
2010.08.18 23:14 dareao malehairadvice
male hair
2009.11.17 08:20 IWatchTooMuchTV How I Met Your Mother
A subreddit for fans of the show How I Met Your Mother. Discussion of, and media from anything How I Met Your Mother related.
2014.08.08 16:49 Aw fuck, feminists!
Fuck yeah, feminism!
2023.03.31 08:21 Creepy_Ear_1014 Diet Chart for Weight Loss for Male
 | submitted by Creepy_Ear_1014 to u/Creepy_Ear_1014 [link] [comments] Maintaining a healthy weight is an important part of overall health and wellness. For men, losing weight can be especially challenging. Fortunately, creating an effective diet chart for men can help them reach their weight loss goals. A well-planned diet chart for male weight loss should include foods that are rich in protein, fiber, and healthy fats while avoiding processed foods and sugary drinks. Additionally, exercising regularly is essential to achieving successful results with any diet plan. With the right combination of nutritious foods and regular exercise, men can create a customized diet chart that will help them lose weight in a safe and sustainable way. Click here to know more: - https://www.health-total.com/weight-loss/weight-loss-for-men/ |
2023.03.31 08:20 celestiallove444 I am in a new relationship and I am taking my boyfriend on a date!
It's a new relationship but I want him to feel "worth it"! I want to put in the effort that men are expected to put in, by stigma. I'm not sure if a girl has ever taken him on a date! I want to do this for him. I'm taking him to the shooting range because it's been a while since he's shot his guns. He knows about that part but after that I am taking him to a hockey game. That is a surprise. :-) I've never taken a guy on a date. I've never wanted to! I'm so excited and giddy! He really is worth it. I want him to know that someone who cares is someone who you can have a movie marathon and lay around in sweats with but is also someone who wants to see you having fun and smiling and knocking back beers waiting to see some blood splatter on the ice with. đ Thank you for reading.â€ïžâđ„ Happy loving!!!
submitted by celestiallove444 to love [link] [comments]
2023.03.31 08:17 Frog_Thor Grand Finale for the Bowl of Judgement Grand Tournament
 | Hello all, submitted by Frog_Thor to CalloftheNetherdeep [link] [comments] My players have been in Ank'Harel for a few sessions now and have been exploring the city and trying to take in all that it has to offer. I have seen many great sidequest ideas, and one that is touched on in the module but isn't really elaborated on is the Grand Tournament at the Bowl of Judgement. All it mentions is "At each competition, spectators wager on who will be the winner of the upcoming match. Anyone who can pay the entry fee of 20 gp can sign up to compete. Although most bouts end with one participant yielding or falling unconscious, death is always a possible outcome in the Bowl of Judgment." I wanted to spice things up a bit and make it so it was more of a party event, while also playing off of one of the parts of the Dungeons and Dragons movie; The Maze (note: I have not seen it yet, what I built was simply inspired by the trailers). I have included the map I built, as well as a labeled version detailing all the traps, creatures, and loots that I put in the maze. Please feel free to use the map, and make it yours. If you do run it, I would love to hear about it in the comments. So without further ado, the map. 43 x 72 https://preview.redd.it/i59p3wkcg0ra1.png?width=2452&format=png&auto=webp&s=86f8df9d52f1a8ff56d73fb5cc8020f585c87194 General Notes: All characters were stripped of their weapons and magic items, and safely stored in lockboxes before heading into the maze, the only thing they were allowed to keep was their armor. All of the 1 tile alcoves contain chests. Most contained loot (+1 weapons, healing potions, non-attunement magic items, etc), some were mimics. Monsters roamed the maze. The monsters I used were displacer beasts and a homebrewed Ram-Lion creature (CR 4). I tried to put them at intersections and areas of the map I expect heavy traffic. 3 parties ran through the maze at once. The PC party, the rival party, and for fun, the D&D movie party (their stat blocks are currently available for free on DnD Beyond) At the start each party rolled initiative and we used the party's overall average for the teams initiative count. On their turn, when not fighting a creature, the party had 3 options: Dash, move twice the parties average movement speed forward down a chosen path blindly, only stopping to ask them for a direction if they came to a fork. The path they travelled was illuminated after they stopped; Perceive and Move, Illuminate the chosen path for the party while they move the parties average movement speed and calling out anything the notice with their perception roll; Chest Interact, Party opens a nearby chest and then proceeds done a path, only illuminating forks until they came to a stop where the rest of their path was illuminated. They were also allowed to make a perception check t disadvantage to notice anything on this turn. Now for the numbered locations 1: The starting point. The parties were randomly assigned to left, middle, and right side 2: "Treasure Room". 3 chests sit in this room, 2 are mimics, the other held a high value item, for me it was 2 Greater Healing Potions. 3: Chain Behir Corridor. A chained up Behir waited down this corridor and would charge at any group that ran in front of it. The chains stopped it 5 feet past the end of the corridor. The idea was to push them into the large open area where the real danger was waiting. If they stayed in its view, it would use its lightning breath. 4: The Wide Expanse. The chest in here held a "Glove of Blasting" (same as a circlet of blasting but with 2 charges). This area also contained many traps. The center was quicksand, along the left most wall were pit traps, and in the bottom right was a flamethrower, DC14 Dex 4d10 fire damage, half on a success. A switch to deactivate the flamethrower was on the right wall as well, feet in front of the end of the flamethrowers reach. 5: Glyph of Warding - Rime's Binding Ice. DC14, pointing straight down and triggers when a humanoid runs past. Meant to slow the group down. 6: Pit Trap. This 1x2 pit trap guarded another 2 more Greater Healing Potions. 7: Gelatinous Wall. Players could attempt to move through this section of the wall by making a DC12 strength check, losing 20 feet of movement for the round and taking 3d6 acid damage. 8: Black cloud. This hallway was contained a thick cloud of smoke that totally obscured vision (even darkvision) and acted similar to stinking cloud DC14, except caused heavy coughing instead. 9: Glyph of Warding - Hypnotic Pattern. DC14, triggered when a humanoid entered the area. Was meant to make the party sitting ducks for the Ram-Lion creature. 10: Glyph of Warding: Entangle. DC 14, increased cube radius to 25 feet with the center at the end of the wall, Again, intended to slow down the party. 11: The Finish Line. The first group to make it to the end is crown the winners of the Grand Tournament, winning 5,000 Gold and glory throughout Ank'Harel. Participants must return all items found within the maze, and all items are return to the players after the tournament. I hope you enjoy. |
2023.03.31 08:16 goodmorninga I just feel so betrayed by "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn." Someone humble me as to what I am missing.
Just as the title says, here are my criticisms. Please humble me and point out where I may have let my bias get in the way of actual understanding. I love this book. I hate how it made me feel. I feel heartbroken by it.
tldr: the ending was callous to me. Why is tom seen as some god? why did they do Jim like this?
my criticism:
Huck starts out as a naĂŻve boy, following the whims of his friend, Tom. Huck went along with all of his crazy plans, just like in Adventures of Tom Sawyer. However, when Huck escapes civilization, and is accompanied by Jim, Huck begins to listen to the inner voice of himself, doing what he knows in his heart to do. Huck defied the ideology of his civilization and their notion that black people are below them. While on their adventures, Huck begins to transform into a more self-confident young man who learned to make tough moral decisions for himself and for Jim. The story flowed by the middle of the book, and was beautifully constructed and set up in the beginning, to make this story a revolutionary vision of freedom of thought for Huck Finn. Huck finn was a relatable character, while being white, he had an alcoholic father and was never really able to find his footing or place in the world before he escaped. That all changed along his journey, as we began to see Huck change, through his experiences, and heart-to-hearts with Jim. Jim was a beautiful depiction of what a beautiful soul looks like. Mark Twainâs humor is sadistic. I believe he wants us to think of him as âspecialâ or âcoolâ for fooling us in the way he did, and for us to not take much seriously by the end of the book. I say this because all of Huckâs character development was thrown out the window once Huck reunited with Tom, and once again became Tomâs submissive shadow. Tomâs second appearance in the novel could have been permitted if Huck had learned something from his journey, and Huck could have stood up for himself and said âTom this is a ridiculous, Jimâs life is at stake.â but he never once stood up for Jim and Huck continued to be the boy-disciple of Tom. Even at the beginning of the novel, I always found Tom Sawyer to be a one-note pony, his ideas werenât even creative, they were just derivatives of Tomâs child-hood story books. Tom, even though he is depicted as 12 years old in the book, he was a depiction of a future sadistic, narcisistic sociopath who does not give a damn about Jimâs life, and believes anyone who stays from his notions are lesser-than and he will look at them with disgust. Huck even said in the book that Tom was the best âSuperintendent,â and going by this as well, it makes Tom out to be an embodiment of a extremist government entity who inflicts pain on others and baffling principles for his own entertainment. I think even on paper, that doing this ending of the book was a horrible move on Mark Twainâs part. What happened to Jimâs daughter? Why was the ending âclarificationâ crammed in the last chapter? Why was everyone all willy-nilly that âoh Jimâs free! But still a slave! Oh, but Hes free guys and oh we learned nothing!â I hate how pretentiouly the name of the last chapter is written, âOh we are gonna sound important by using roman numerals for all the chapters, but the last chapter will be CHAPTER THE LAST; Nothing More to Write.â like câmon, This has got to be some kind of sick joke on the readers. I was so frustrated reading the final chapters which were drawn-out (an understatement) with the stupid failed plan of Toms, I wanted to skip them but I kept reading only because of Jim. I am disappointed in this book, but I am most disappointed in Huck, for not applying anything of what he had learned on his endeavor. Iâm not disappointed in Tom though, because Iâm not going to reason or debate with an obnoxious child who is a spoiled and entitled person. I hope Jim is okay. I feel horrible for him, for being treated like this only because he was born. I wish Mark Twain gave him a better ending. If I were to read this book again, I would only read up to the part until stupid Tom comes back in. Very bad taste in my mouth after this one, but if there is a main message it would be that, do not waste your time entertaining a crazy personâs ideas and follow your own moral compass on what you think is right.
I loved Huck Finn though. I loved this book. I didnât mind the dialects, once you got into it the dialect became just a different slice of life that you understood. Jimâs dialect and quotes were very endearing to me, I adored the character of Jim, and rooted for him throughout the book. Some parts moved me to tears. This book was so well written, and thatâs where my devastation came from by the end of it. Until I was halfway through the book, I thought Huck Finn was black. I must not have noticed where they said he was white until the book hinted at it in the middle, and I was confused for the next few chapters, and I chuckled because everyone else already knew and I just found out. Maybe a language barrier thing with the dialect that I didnât pick up on till I was invested in the book. It was amazing to watch the transformation and growth of Huck. The rafts symbolism was very interesting and it being a travelling safe haven for the adventures of Huck and Jim was such a cool concept. The book didnât try to be something it wasnât, it was funny, bitter-sweet, and heart-breaking. I disagree with others who say this book is racist, it is quite the opposite. While Iâm mad at Mark Twain, I can understand that he didnât want Tom Sawyerâs actions to be well-received by readers, and it makes a statement that I canât articulate at this late hour. All that I can say though is that this book is beautiful.
submitted by goodmorninga to books [link] [comments]
tldr: the ending was callous to me. Why is tom seen as some god? why did they do Jim like this?
my criticism:
Huck starts out as a naĂŻve boy, following the whims of his friend, Tom. Huck went along with all of his crazy plans, just like in Adventures of Tom Sawyer. However, when Huck escapes civilization, and is accompanied by Jim, Huck begins to listen to the inner voice of himself, doing what he knows in his heart to do. Huck defied the ideology of his civilization and their notion that black people are below them. While on their adventures, Huck begins to transform into a more self-confident young man who learned to make tough moral decisions for himself and for Jim. The story flowed by the middle of the book, and was beautifully constructed and set up in the beginning, to make this story a revolutionary vision of freedom of thought for Huck Finn. Huck finn was a relatable character, while being white, he had an alcoholic father and was never really able to find his footing or place in the world before he escaped. That all changed along his journey, as we began to see Huck change, through his experiences, and heart-to-hearts with Jim. Jim was a beautiful depiction of what a beautiful soul looks like. Mark Twainâs humor is sadistic. I believe he wants us to think of him as âspecialâ or âcoolâ for fooling us in the way he did, and for us to not take much seriously by the end of the book. I say this because all of Huckâs character development was thrown out the window once Huck reunited with Tom, and once again became Tomâs submissive shadow. Tomâs second appearance in the novel could have been permitted if Huck had learned something from his journey, and Huck could have stood up for himself and said âTom this is a ridiculous, Jimâs life is at stake.â but he never once stood up for Jim and Huck continued to be the boy-disciple of Tom. Even at the beginning of the novel, I always found Tom Sawyer to be a one-note pony, his ideas werenât even creative, they were just derivatives of Tomâs child-hood story books. Tom, even though he is depicted as 12 years old in the book, he was a depiction of a future sadistic, narcisistic sociopath who does not give a damn about Jimâs life, and believes anyone who stays from his notions are lesser-than and he will look at them with disgust. Huck even said in the book that Tom was the best âSuperintendent,â and going by this as well, it makes Tom out to be an embodiment of a extremist government entity who inflicts pain on others and baffling principles for his own entertainment. I think even on paper, that doing this ending of the book was a horrible move on Mark Twainâs part. What happened to Jimâs daughter? Why was the ending âclarificationâ crammed in the last chapter? Why was everyone all willy-nilly that âoh Jimâs free! But still a slave! Oh, but Hes free guys and oh we learned nothing!â I hate how pretentiouly the name of the last chapter is written, âOh we are gonna sound important by using roman numerals for all the chapters, but the last chapter will be CHAPTER THE LAST; Nothing More to Write.â like câmon, This has got to be some kind of sick joke on the readers. I was so frustrated reading the final chapters which were drawn-out (an understatement) with the stupid failed plan of Toms, I wanted to skip them but I kept reading only because of Jim. I am disappointed in this book, but I am most disappointed in Huck, for not applying anything of what he had learned on his endeavor. Iâm not disappointed in Tom though, because Iâm not going to reason or debate with an obnoxious child who is a spoiled and entitled person. I hope Jim is okay. I feel horrible for him, for being treated like this only because he was born. I wish Mark Twain gave him a better ending. If I were to read this book again, I would only read up to the part until stupid Tom comes back in. Very bad taste in my mouth after this one, but if there is a main message it would be that, do not waste your time entertaining a crazy personâs ideas and follow your own moral compass on what you think is right.
I loved Huck Finn though. I loved this book. I didnât mind the dialects, once you got into it the dialect became just a different slice of life that you understood. Jimâs dialect and quotes were very endearing to me, I adored the character of Jim, and rooted for him throughout the book. Some parts moved me to tears. This book was so well written, and thatâs where my devastation came from by the end of it. Until I was halfway through the book, I thought Huck Finn was black. I must not have noticed where they said he was white until the book hinted at it in the middle, and I was confused for the next few chapters, and I chuckled because everyone else already knew and I just found out. Maybe a language barrier thing with the dialect that I didnât pick up on till I was invested in the book. It was amazing to watch the transformation and growth of Huck. The rafts symbolism was very interesting and it being a travelling safe haven for the adventures of Huck and Jim was such a cool concept. The book didnât try to be something it wasnât, it was funny, bitter-sweet, and heart-breaking. I disagree with others who say this book is racist, it is quite the opposite. While Iâm mad at Mark Twain, I can understand that he didnât want Tom Sawyerâs actions to be well-received by readers, and it makes a statement that I canât articulate at this late hour. All that I can say though is that this book is beautiful.
2023.03.31 08:11 CaptainDrunkRedhead The 2023 Games: Cricket Mens National T20 Round 2, part 8 replay
submitted by CaptainDrunkRedhead to olympicvideogames [link] [comments]
2023.03.31 08:08 Chubb_Life When grown-ass men keep getting the same haircut as when they were 8!
 | submitted by Chubb_Life to PetPeeves [link] [comments] |
2023.03.31 08:06 stlatos Hungarian agyar âtusk/fangâ, ostor âwhipâ
Hn. agyar âtusk/fangâ, ostor âwhipâ have been directly related to Iranian words. These are seen as loans, but Iâm not sure; the timing doesnât seem to allow this considering the conates of agyar in Uralic (see below). In a similar way, *h2ag^tro- âwhip / goadâ > *acâtro > *ocâtra > *ocâtora > Hn. ostor âwhipâ might show that it would require an IE source with *a-o > *o-a, not directly from known Iranian (in which *o > a). A careful examination of a likely loan can give insight into other suspected loans are real. The loan for an object like âwhipâ is more likely than âtusk / fangâ (and the mentioned significance of carrying a fang in cultures that are conservative in their retentions of ancient beliefs mentioned in the paper https://www.academia.edu/91578596/Revisiting_a_problematic_Uralic_and_Indo_Iranian_word_family certainly makes an Iranian loan LESS likely, not more).
The troubles the author feels about the relationships between these words concern my reconstructions in https://www.reddit.com/usestlatos/comments/12282lq/uralic_languages_and_pie/ :
*h2anku(lo)- > Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, G. agkĂșlos âcurved/crookedâ, TB ÄnkĂ€r âtuskâ
*h2ank^ĂŒ(lo)- > Av. -asĆ«ra-, Os. Ă«nsur(Ă«), [*-ka-] Kho. haska âtuskâ
*xaĆâtâura- > *onâcâara- > Mi. Ă€n's'Çr, Khanty ĂąĆ'tÇl, Hn. agyar âtusk/fangâ, Z. vodz'ir
*xaĆâtâa- > X. ĂąĆÇt âhorn/antlerâ, Mi. Änât, Nen. nâamtÇ
The different Vâs in Ugric seem to be caused by *xaĆâtâĂŒra- > *anâcâura- > *onâcâara- vs. *xaĆâtâĂŒra- > *anâcâĂŒra- > *önâcâĂŒrĂ€- (or very similar; no reason to think V-harmony was completely finished at the PU stage). That is, middle -u- causes rounding of the previous V ( > wV- in Permic ). This o \ wa is noted as a problem in the paper, cause unclear despite several examples; I think the timing allows rounding by u \ ĂŒ to cover it here. South Mi. might show *Ă€-ĂŒ > *E-i; both rounding and later unrounding by the pal. C seem likely in some languages, and without other ex. of a-ĂŒ-a I wonât look for more regularity yet.
The other words with sâ from (attested) Iranian s probably also show that palatalization was retained quite late in Iran., not k^ > s early. The *ĂŒ is needed if the Ugric words are related (and there should be no doubt). It is further evidence that IE u > ĂŒ existed in a number of branches, seen directly by u > u \ i (and ĂŒ in Nuristani) and also by its effects on K (opt. > K^ as seen in anku- vs. Ă«nsur(Ă«) and many others). The Uralic words would support this even if loans. The *ku vs. *k^u in Indo-Iranian came from optional *u > *ĂŒ causing K > K^ (as in Arm., also G. kĂșmbos âvessel/goblet, Skt. kumbhĂĄ-s âjapitchewater jar; *câump(l)V(lV) âdrinking vessel made of birchbarkâ ).
Examples of k > k^:
*leuk- âlight/brightâ > Arm. loys, Latin lĆ«x âlightâ, gen. lĆ«cis, Skt. ruk- vs. *lukont- > *lĂŒk^ont- > rĂșĆant- âbright/shiningâ
*tranku(r)- > Li. trankĂčs âjolting/roughâ, ON ĂŸröngr ânarrowâ, Arm. t`anjr âtightâ
*kh2artu(r)- > Go. hardus, G. kratĂșs âstrongâ, Arm. karcr âhardâ
*presgu-? > Armenian erÄc` âelderâ, Greek prĂ©sbus âold manâ
*kub- âbend/curveâ > G. kĂșbos âhollow above hips on cattleâ, L. cubitus âelbowâ, Skt. chĂșbuka- \ cubuka- \ cibuka- âchinâ
*(s)kewdh- > OE hĂœdan, E, hide, G. keĂșthĆ âcovehideâ, Arm. suzem âimmerseâ (*eu > *Ă¶ĂŒ ?)
Saying that Khanty ĂąĆ'tÇl canât be connected to the Iranian âoriginalâ assumes these are loans to begin with; in a paper examining this question itself, such assumptions should not be made before the final proof of relation (or lack) is found. The difference in l \ r being considered a problem does not consider the âoriginalâ behind the Iranian words: *h2anku(lo)- > Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, G. agkĂșlos âcurved/crookedâ show -l- OUTSIDE of Iranian. This makes a direct loan from Iranian > Ugric less likely. If the connection is clear, it would be a loan from other IE or inherited (showing a relation to IE of some type). Other words like F. yrkö âmanâ, yrkĂ€ \ ylkĂ€ âsuitogroomâ, Hn. fogoly \ fogor- \ fogu-, also show alt. of l, so are they ALL non-Uralic?
I agree that IE *h2an- vs. *h2n- is not a problem (behind -n- vs. 0 in Iran.). Since thereâs evidence that Arm. u-stems with nom. in *-ur > -r retain an old IE feature, *h2anku- \ *h2anku:ro- \ *h2ankulo- could all be from *-urho- (with optional changes involving *h needed to explain u \ u: ). Thereâs no need at all for an r\n-stem to create TB ÄnkĂ€r âtuskâ. If r \ l is seen in both IE and Uralic, why is this not ev. that r \ l existed? Seeing it as ev. that these were unrelated makes no sense, especially for such an otherwise similar group of words. More *-ur might be seen in:
*pek^ur > Skt. paĆĂș, OPr pecku âcattleâ, G. pĂłkos âfleeceâ, Arm. asr, gen. asu; *poÄur > F. poro âreindeerâ, Sm. boadzo
IE origin of *poÄur (as *poÄaw) via loan, has been suggested. This seems to show, if IE, that *-u not *-aw existed. Metathesis of *-r could be behind -r- in F.
As part of the alternation above, *h2nk^ĂŒko- > *hac^uka- > *hac^ka- > Kho. haska âtuskâ shows nothing odd. Retention of *h- as h- or x- is described in works like https://www.academia.edu/44309119/_Prothetic_h_in_Khotanese_and_the_reconstruction_of_Proto_Iranic . Opt. -u- > 0 seen in https://www.reddit.com/etymology/comments/w01466/importance_of_armenian_retention_of_vowels_in/ .
Just as IE shows -u- vs. -ulo- in Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, the relation of *xaĆâtâura- and *xaĆâtâa- above need not be doubted. If loans, these would certainly be a wide range of borrowings (with each from a different IE language, if regular as it is currently understood). The alt. in (palatal) t / nt / mt could be regular if from Ćâtâ (for details, see pg. 19-20 of https://www.academia.edu/41659514/URALIC_ETYMOLOGICAL_DICTIONARY_draft_version_of_entries_A_%C4%86_ ). Though there are no other examples of this cluster in PU, the match with IE supports this older velar > pal. dental. This grouping suggests these languages began changing Ćâtâ before the reconstructed final form of PU (when Kâ and Tâ of all types might merge or depalatalize), or some of this could be optional.
I do not find mentioning Lubotskyâs idea that all Iranian words with problems (or without for some of these examples, *kapauta-, *puk^syo- (E. fox), seem fine) are from non-IE substrates. He uses this much too often, along with Scythian loans, with no evidence (indeed, often ignoring evidence favoring his opponents).
Alb Albanian
Arm Armenian
Aro Aromanian
Av Avestan
B Bangani
Bg Bulgarian
E English
G Greek
Go Gothic
Gy Gypsy
H Hittite
Is Ishkashimi
It Italian
Kh KhowĂ r
Kho Khotanese
L Latin
Li Lithuanian
MArm Middle Armenian
MW Middle Welsh
NHG New High German
MHG Middle High German
OHG Old High German
OIc Old Icelandic
OIr Old Irish
OE Old English
ON Old Norse
OPr Old Prussian
OP Old Persian
MP Middle Persian
NP (New) Persian (Farsi)
Ni NiĆĄei-alĂą
Os Ossetian
Phr Phrygian
R Russian
Rom Romani
Ru Romanian\Rumanian
Sar Sarikoli
Shu Shughni
Skt Sanskrit
Sog Sogdian
TA Tocharian A
TB Tocharian B
W Welsh
F Finnish
Es Estonian
Sm Saami
Hn Hungarian / Magyar
X Khanty / Ostyak
Mi Mansi / Vogul
Mr Mari / Cheremis
Mv Mordvin / Erzya
Mh Moksha
Ud Udmurt / Votya
Z Zyrian / Komi
Py Permyak
Nga Nganasan / Tavgi
En Enets
Nen Nenets
Skp Selkup
Y Yukaghir
submitted by stlatos to hungarian [link] [comments]
The troubles the author feels about the relationships between these words concern my reconstructions in https://www.reddit.com/usestlatos/comments/12282lq/uralic_languages_and_pie/ :
*h2anku(lo)- > Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, G. agkĂșlos âcurved/crookedâ, TB ÄnkĂ€r âtuskâ
*h2ank^ĂŒ(lo)- > Av. -asĆ«ra-, Os. Ă«nsur(Ă«), [*-ka-] Kho. haska âtuskâ
*xaĆâtâura- > *onâcâara- > Mi. Ă€n's'Çr, Khanty ĂąĆ'tÇl, Hn. agyar âtusk/fangâ, Z. vodz'ir
*xaĆâtâa- > X. ĂąĆÇt âhorn/antlerâ, Mi. Änât, Nen. nâamtÇ
The different Vâs in Ugric seem to be caused by *xaĆâtâĂŒra- > *anâcâura- > *onâcâara- vs. *xaĆâtâĂŒra- > *anâcâĂŒra- > *önâcâĂŒrĂ€- (or very similar; no reason to think V-harmony was completely finished at the PU stage). That is, middle -u- causes rounding of the previous V ( > wV- in Permic ). This o \ wa is noted as a problem in the paper, cause unclear despite several examples; I think the timing allows rounding by u \ ĂŒ to cover it here. South Mi. might show *Ă€-ĂŒ > *E-i; both rounding and later unrounding by the pal. C seem likely in some languages, and without other ex. of a-ĂŒ-a I wonât look for more regularity yet.
The other words with sâ from (attested) Iranian s probably also show that palatalization was retained quite late in Iran., not k^ > s early. The *ĂŒ is needed if the Ugric words are related (and there should be no doubt). It is further evidence that IE u > ĂŒ existed in a number of branches, seen directly by u > u \ i (and ĂŒ in Nuristani) and also by its effects on K (opt. > K^ as seen in anku- vs. Ă«nsur(Ă«) and many others). The Uralic words would support this even if loans. The *ku vs. *k^u in Indo-Iranian came from optional *u > *ĂŒ causing K > K^ (as in Arm., also G. kĂșmbos âvessel/goblet, Skt. kumbhĂĄ-s âjapitchewater jar; *câump(l)V(lV) âdrinking vessel made of birchbarkâ ).
Examples of k > k^:
*leuk- âlight/brightâ > Arm. loys, Latin lĆ«x âlightâ, gen. lĆ«cis, Skt. ruk- vs. *lukont- > *lĂŒk^ont- > rĂșĆant- âbright/shiningâ
*tranku(r)- > Li. trankĂčs âjolting/roughâ, ON ĂŸröngr ânarrowâ, Arm. t`anjr âtightâ
*kh2artu(r)- > Go. hardus, G. kratĂșs âstrongâ, Arm. karcr âhardâ
*presgu-? > Armenian erÄc` âelderâ, Greek prĂ©sbus âold manâ
*kub- âbend/curveâ > G. kĂșbos âhollow above hips on cattleâ, L. cubitus âelbowâ, Skt. chĂșbuka- \ cubuka- \ cibuka- âchinâ
*(s)kewdh- > OE hĂœdan, E, hide, G. keĂșthĆ âcovehideâ, Arm. suzem âimmerseâ (*eu > *Ă¶ĂŒ ?)
Saying that Khanty ĂąĆ'tÇl canât be connected to the Iranian âoriginalâ assumes these are loans to begin with; in a paper examining this question itself, such assumptions should not be made before the final proof of relation (or lack) is found. The difference in l \ r being considered a problem does not consider the âoriginalâ behind the Iranian words: *h2anku(lo)- > Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, G. agkĂșlos âcurved/crookedâ show -l- OUTSIDE of Iranian. This makes a direct loan from Iranian > Ugric less likely. If the connection is clear, it would be a loan from other IE or inherited (showing a relation to IE of some type). Other words like F. yrkö âmanâ, yrkĂ€ \ ylkĂ€ âsuitogroomâ, Hn. fogoly \ fogor- \ fogu-, also show alt. of l, so are they ALL non-Uralic?
I agree that IE *h2an- vs. *h2n- is not a problem (behind -n- vs. 0 in Iran.). Since thereâs evidence that Arm. u-stems with nom. in *-ur > -r retain an old IE feature, *h2anku- \ *h2anku:ro- \ *h2ankulo- could all be from *-urho- (with optional changes involving *h needed to explain u \ u: ). Thereâs no need at all for an r\n-stem to create TB ÄnkĂ€r âtuskâ. If r \ l is seen in both IE and Uralic, why is this not ev. that r \ l existed? Seeing it as ev. that these were unrelated makes no sense, especially for such an otherwise similar group of words. More *-ur might be seen in:
*pek^ur > Skt. paĆĂș, OPr pecku âcattleâ, G. pĂłkos âfleeceâ, Arm. asr, gen. asu; *poÄur > F. poro âreindeerâ, Sm. boadzo
IE origin of *poÄur (as *poÄaw) via loan, has been suggested. This seems to show, if IE, that *-u not *-aw existed. Metathesis of *-r could be behind -r- in F.
As part of the alternation above, *h2nk^ĂŒko- > *hac^uka- > *hac^ka- > Kho. haska âtuskâ shows nothing odd. Retention of *h- as h- or x- is described in works like https://www.academia.edu/44309119/_Prothetic_h_in_Khotanese_and_the_reconstruction_of_Proto_Iranic . Opt. -u- > 0 seen in https://www.reddit.com/etymology/comments/w01466/importance_of_armenian_retention_of_vowels_in/ .
Just as IE shows -u- vs. -ulo- in Av. anku- âhookâ, ON öngoll âfishhookâ, the relation of *xaĆâtâura- and *xaĆâtâa- above need not be doubted. If loans, these would certainly be a wide range of borrowings (with each from a different IE language, if regular as it is currently understood). The alt. in (palatal) t / nt / mt could be regular if from Ćâtâ (for details, see pg. 19-20 of https://www.academia.edu/41659514/URALIC_ETYMOLOGICAL_DICTIONARY_draft_version_of_entries_A_%C4%86_ ). Though there are no other examples of this cluster in PU, the match with IE supports this older velar > pal. dental. This grouping suggests these languages began changing Ćâtâ before the reconstructed final form of PU (when Kâ and Tâ of all types might merge or depalatalize), or some of this could be optional.
I do not find mentioning Lubotskyâs idea that all Iranian words with problems (or without for some of these examples, *kapauta-, *puk^syo- (E. fox), seem fine) are from non-IE substrates. He uses this much too often, along with Scythian loans, with no evidence (indeed, often ignoring evidence favoring his opponents).
Alb Albanian
Arm Armenian
Aro Aromanian
Av Avestan
B Bangani
Bg Bulgarian
E English
G Greek
Go Gothic
Gy Gypsy
H Hittite
Is Ishkashimi
It Italian
Kh KhowĂ r
Kho Khotanese
L Latin
Li Lithuanian
MArm Middle Armenian
MW Middle Welsh
NHG New High German
MHG Middle High German
OHG Old High German
OIc Old Icelandic
OIr Old Irish
OE Old English
ON Old Norse
OPr Old Prussian
OP Old Persian
MP Middle Persian
NP (New) Persian (Farsi)
Ni NiĆĄei-alĂą
Os Ossetian
Phr Phrygian
R Russian
Rom Romani
Ru Romanian\Rumanian
Sar Sarikoli
Shu Shughni
Skt Sanskrit
Sog Sogdian
TA Tocharian A
TB Tocharian B
W Welsh
F Finnish
Es Estonian
Sm Saami
Hn Hungarian / Magyar
X Khanty / Ostyak
Mi Mansi / Vogul
Mr Mari / Cheremis
Mv Mordvin / Erzya
Mh Moksha
Ud Udmurt / Votya
Z Zyrian / Komi
Py Permyak
Nga Nganasan / Tavgi
En Enets
Nen Nenets
Skp Selkup
Y Yukaghir
2023.03.31 08:02 WorldAwayTweedy My Letter To Someone Who Was Eaten By A Bear
Iâm a cosmic accident, I think.
Nothing I eat is natural. Itâs carbonated, plastic, packaged, pulled off multiple conveyer belts and hastily cobbled together by the fastest machine or underachiever who can assemble it a thousand times over in an hour. Put on a shelf by another underachiever. Left there as long as legally possible. I eat it and deep down I think thatâs charming. I think Iâm special because I have some money but prefer eating trash over something that had the slightest semblance of care put into it. I donât need organic, grass-fed, farm-raised, non-GMO shit. I donât need stuff that has the appearance of effort. Give me the sludge. Iâm different after all. An anomaly. So unique, in fact, that my life just has to end up grand.
I convince myself that Iâm self-aware. So self-aware that Iâm aware that I use self-awareness to power my ego. God damn thatâs aware. Aware about my awareness. Aware wolf. Fuck you.
I keep going back to nature. Thereâs something there that I havenât⊠written yet about it. Thereâs a deeper observation that I havenât dug out of the earth yet. The whole thing haunts me. Itâs so interesting and clinical. Itâs so brutal. Itâs also the very essence of everything. It just fucking is man. Iâve never seen a thing that is more what it fucking is than nature, yâknow? To quote the great David Attenborough: It just fucking is, man.
Nature is beings of various levels of consciousness trolling for energy. Cows are cute and they sit in the field and eat grass and their big meaty bodies grow and achieve sustenance through this. Nothing brutal. Grass doesnât have feelings. Seriously. The whole world could be fucking cows, and aside from that weird global warming thing thatâs tied to cows farting that I donât really understand, it would all be chill and it would all be peaceful.
Panda bears! Shouldâve gone extinct. But we think theyâre cute, and so they live. Which is a good thing. Sorry incels. Lookism is a thing even for PETA. Besides some human intervention â fences, caretakers, people to plant trees Iâm guessing, Panda bears exist by eating bamboo. Just. Bamboo. Their fucking big meaty bodies and adorable faces fatten up nice and plump through bamboo. How? Seriously. How does that work?
If the planet were vegan humans, Cows, and Panda Bears, who could ever imagine that nature was brutal and unkind and built on the foundation of "survival of the fittest"?
But no, there are other animals. Bears. Cutest fucking things. They can swim and climb trees and run faster than all of us. They eat plants, berries, fish (kind of sentient), other bear cubs, deers, most mammals if they run into them, no? And they need meat to survive, in part. And they stalk their prey, and they can smell 100x better than humans can. Evolution has hard-wired them to devour so they can live and reproduce.
Devour is a great word. It sounds brutal. The process of devouring is brutal. They eat their victims live. They donât snap their necks. They just bite and chew and crunch and the prey has to feel most of it. Why does the prey have to feel most of it, you ask? Well, my dear friend, because nature has hard-wired the prey to live. Hard-wired it to avoid pain, as pain often (correctly) indicates some sort of danger.
So, the bear wins the engagement. The deer loses. Evolution rewards the bear with sustenance so that it can stay alive. Conscious. Here. Thinking. The brain gets to continue. The bear gets to continue. The deer has to feel every brutal fucking sting of its destruction. It feels itself disappearing, flesh and meat being pulled from the bone. It is the most painful moment of that deerâs life. It has to be. Millions of years of progression that led to the birth of that deer. Its pre-programmed fears. Its biological drives. Its... unique quirks. The ones that it has to have. If you have pets, you know what I'm talking about. All of this leading to this one moment, where the world is the most "itself" its ever been. The thing we all know and understand. The hierarchy of things. The deer was born, it lived, and it made its way to this pivotal moment - a dayâs sustenance for a stranger. Perhaps some biological thrill for this bear who doesn't really ever think about anything at all. And the most pain the deer has ever experienced.
And then itâs gone forever.
Deer canât think as much as we can. I think about the mistakes that people make.
More likely than not, you have to truly fuck up, to get eaten as a person.
Itâs almost like a throwback! Or a real moment of empathy. You're sharing a true, kindred understanding of the experience shared by your fellow prey. Weâre not supposed to be in this, and yet, you hiked in the wrong spot, took the wrong advice, made the wrong sorts of noises, and assumed the world was fair. And you were eaten.
You were born. And then you were eaten. You were a dayâs sustenance for a bear.
And that was the point! That was your point. That is why you were born. To be energy for something that only acts on instinct. All of the points along the way â the ways that you influenced people, or hurt them, or hugged them, or fucked them, or truly cared about them, or were oblivious (P.S. this is the one that killed you), they led to this.
People gather around you and your mother in the room you were born in. Youâre born with company. Youâre never born alone. Imagine if they all knew how it all was going to end.
You were born to feed a stranger.
You, very likely, believed that all of this was fair. And that you might have some luck. Or some God. You thought that terrible happenings were aberrationsâ rare, far away, would never happen to you. Three sentence stories in the paper.
But that same programming that exists in the deer exists in you. Pain = Bad. Getting Devoured = Death. Evolution hates death. LIVE. SURVIVE. REPRODUCE. You must! And hereâs your reminder to make sure that nature keeps you in check â the worst fucking physical pain on planet earth. Ungodly pain. Pain off the spectrum. Pain you didnât know you could access. Pain that humans have, for the most part, completely wiped out. But itâs there! Youâre an animal after all.
And yet, something more sinister is paired with all of this. Deer donât read philosophy. You do. You read The Metamorphosis in Lit 101 and it made you feel empty. Forgetting Sarah Marshall left a personal impact on you in a way that you just know is different from your peers. Sometimes in the middle of the night you think about how much you love your mom and youâre so confused at how little you feel that during the day but at night you just wanna cry and bawl and fucking hell you just love everyone. You read poetry. You listen to stand up comedy. Youâve listened to Jerry Seinfeld talk about joke construction. Words. Their meaning. The ways in which you arrange them. Delivery. Thereâs a good way to write something. Thereâs a perfect way to write something. Conversations have rhythm. Dialogue in scripts. Aaron Sorkin has a specific style of writing. He just does. It clicks for some people. It doesnât for others. You like it, for the most part.
And now youâre getting eaten by a bear.
And beyond the physical pain is the mental pain. You have to think about this as you feed a stranger. Your whole life. All of the beautiful moments. The ways in which people describe the cosmos. Star stuff. A divine order to things. Everything happens for a reason.
A bear with a dead stare eats you. You fade away.
The bear escapes on its merry way.
Life goes on.
I stop thinking about you.
I think about ordering a Slurpee using Uber Eats. I opt for Skip the Dishes instead. Iâm not sure why.
May you rest in peace.
submitted by WorldAwayTweedy to LibraryofBabel [link] [comments]
Nothing I eat is natural. Itâs carbonated, plastic, packaged, pulled off multiple conveyer belts and hastily cobbled together by the fastest machine or underachiever who can assemble it a thousand times over in an hour. Put on a shelf by another underachiever. Left there as long as legally possible. I eat it and deep down I think thatâs charming. I think Iâm special because I have some money but prefer eating trash over something that had the slightest semblance of care put into it. I donât need organic, grass-fed, farm-raised, non-GMO shit. I donât need stuff that has the appearance of effort. Give me the sludge. Iâm different after all. An anomaly. So unique, in fact, that my life just has to end up grand.
I convince myself that Iâm self-aware. So self-aware that Iâm aware that I use self-awareness to power my ego. God damn thatâs aware. Aware about my awareness. Aware wolf. Fuck you.
I keep going back to nature. Thereâs something there that I havenât⊠written yet about it. Thereâs a deeper observation that I havenât dug out of the earth yet. The whole thing haunts me. Itâs so interesting and clinical. Itâs so brutal. Itâs also the very essence of everything. It just fucking is man. Iâve never seen a thing that is more what it fucking is than nature, yâknow? To quote the great David Attenborough: It just fucking is, man.
Nature is beings of various levels of consciousness trolling for energy. Cows are cute and they sit in the field and eat grass and their big meaty bodies grow and achieve sustenance through this. Nothing brutal. Grass doesnât have feelings. Seriously. The whole world could be fucking cows, and aside from that weird global warming thing thatâs tied to cows farting that I donât really understand, it would all be chill and it would all be peaceful.
Panda bears! Shouldâve gone extinct. But we think theyâre cute, and so they live. Which is a good thing. Sorry incels. Lookism is a thing even for PETA. Besides some human intervention â fences, caretakers, people to plant trees Iâm guessing, Panda bears exist by eating bamboo. Just. Bamboo. Their fucking big meaty bodies and adorable faces fatten up nice and plump through bamboo. How? Seriously. How does that work?
If the planet were vegan humans, Cows, and Panda Bears, who could ever imagine that nature was brutal and unkind and built on the foundation of "survival of the fittest"?
But no, there are other animals. Bears. Cutest fucking things. They can swim and climb trees and run faster than all of us. They eat plants, berries, fish (kind of sentient), other bear cubs, deers, most mammals if they run into them, no? And they need meat to survive, in part. And they stalk their prey, and they can smell 100x better than humans can. Evolution has hard-wired them to devour so they can live and reproduce.
Devour is a great word. It sounds brutal. The process of devouring is brutal. They eat their victims live. They donât snap their necks. They just bite and chew and crunch and the prey has to feel most of it. Why does the prey have to feel most of it, you ask? Well, my dear friend, because nature has hard-wired the prey to live. Hard-wired it to avoid pain, as pain often (correctly) indicates some sort of danger.
So, the bear wins the engagement. The deer loses. Evolution rewards the bear with sustenance so that it can stay alive. Conscious. Here. Thinking. The brain gets to continue. The bear gets to continue. The deer has to feel every brutal fucking sting of its destruction. It feels itself disappearing, flesh and meat being pulled from the bone. It is the most painful moment of that deerâs life. It has to be. Millions of years of progression that led to the birth of that deer. Its pre-programmed fears. Its biological drives. Its... unique quirks. The ones that it has to have. If you have pets, you know what I'm talking about. All of this leading to this one moment, where the world is the most "itself" its ever been. The thing we all know and understand. The hierarchy of things. The deer was born, it lived, and it made its way to this pivotal moment - a dayâs sustenance for a stranger. Perhaps some biological thrill for this bear who doesn't really ever think about anything at all. And the most pain the deer has ever experienced.
And then itâs gone forever.
Deer canât think as much as we can. I think about the mistakes that people make.
More likely than not, you have to truly fuck up, to get eaten as a person.
Itâs almost like a throwback! Or a real moment of empathy. You're sharing a true, kindred understanding of the experience shared by your fellow prey. Weâre not supposed to be in this, and yet, you hiked in the wrong spot, took the wrong advice, made the wrong sorts of noises, and assumed the world was fair. And you were eaten.
You were born. And then you were eaten. You were a dayâs sustenance for a bear.
And that was the point! That was your point. That is why you were born. To be energy for something that only acts on instinct. All of the points along the way â the ways that you influenced people, or hurt them, or hugged them, or fucked them, or truly cared about them, or were oblivious (P.S. this is the one that killed you), they led to this.
People gather around you and your mother in the room you were born in. Youâre born with company. Youâre never born alone. Imagine if they all knew how it all was going to end.
You were born to feed a stranger.
You, very likely, believed that all of this was fair. And that you might have some luck. Or some God. You thought that terrible happenings were aberrationsâ rare, far away, would never happen to you. Three sentence stories in the paper.
But that same programming that exists in the deer exists in you. Pain = Bad. Getting Devoured = Death. Evolution hates death. LIVE. SURVIVE. REPRODUCE. You must! And hereâs your reminder to make sure that nature keeps you in check â the worst fucking physical pain on planet earth. Ungodly pain. Pain off the spectrum. Pain you didnât know you could access. Pain that humans have, for the most part, completely wiped out. But itâs there! Youâre an animal after all.
And yet, something more sinister is paired with all of this. Deer donât read philosophy. You do. You read The Metamorphosis in Lit 101 and it made you feel empty. Forgetting Sarah Marshall left a personal impact on you in a way that you just know is different from your peers. Sometimes in the middle of the night you think about how much you love your mom and youâre so confused at how little you feel that during the day but at night you just wanna cry and bawl and fucking hell you just love everyone. You read poetry. You listen to stand up comedy. Youâve listened to Jerry Seinfeld talk about joke construction. Words. Their meaning. The ways in which you arrange them. Delivery. Thereâs a good way to write something. Thereâs a perfect way to write something. Conversations have rhythm. Dialogue in scripts. Aaron Sorkin has a specific style of writing. He just does. It clicks for some people. It doesnât for others. You like it, for the most part.
And now youâre getting eaten by a bear.
And beyond the physical pain is the mental pain. You have to think about this as you feed a stranger. Your whole life. All of the beautiful moments. The ways in which people describe the cosmos. Star stuff. A divine order to things. Everything happens for a reason.
A bear with a dead stare eats you. You fade away.
The bear escapes on its merry way.
Life goes on.
I stop thinking about you.
I think about ordering a Slurpee using Uber Eats. I opt for Skip the Dishes instead. Iâm not sure why.
May you rest in peace.
2023.03.31 07:46 Due_Seaworthiness971 26 F looking for exciting [chat] just to feel something
Hello ! I don't know exactly what I am looking for, and that's the fun part. I just want it to be mindblowing, not knowing what's surprising path you're going to guide me on. I wanna laugh, I wanna smile, I wanna get addicted to our chat, I wanna doubt, I wanna feel crazy, I wanna grow, I wanna explore, I wanna feel vulnerable, I wanna see how powerful you are, I wanna build something unique, I wanna be mold into something new, I wanna feel dumb, I wanna be roasted, I want your kindness and attention, I wanna be silly... maybe you know better than me. Well, the only sure things is that I don't wanna be bored. Can't wait to see how crazy it is going to be :p (Men are welcome, even way older ones, as long you're not rude creeps)
submitted by Due_Seaworthiness971 to MeetPeople [link] [comments]
2023.03.31 07:45 Koishukaze Looking for build help
I am planing to upgrade my pc in the unclear future, I don't really have a thought out budget but I would prefer to spend as little as possible (by only replacing a few parts) I don't really play "heavy" games rather the middle ground between heavy and medium, however I do play VR games as well as elite dangerous odyssey and ksp2
I am aware that the motherboard will need replacing if I wish to get a new cpu (which I do plan to)
https://au.pcpartpicker.com/useKoishukaze/saved/WJTyWZ
submitted by Koishukaze to PcBuild [link] [comments]
I am aware that the motherboard will need replacing if I wish to get a new cpu (which I do plan to)
https://au.pcpartpicker.com/useKoishukaze/saved/WJTyWZ
2023.03.31 07:45 HaHaHashimoto I'm on writing practice by trying to rewrite a novel I made 10 years ago. I need feedback. Thanks.
I would like to know if the transition is clunky and if the scenes are confusing or lacking.
(Title: Sunset in the Year 24. Prologue. Words: 1030)
"Nomiya, isn't it?"
"Yes."
The two men moved their eyes to the scene of the ceremony.
"They say you're the last man who saw him alive."
"From the looks of it, yes."
Shunji figured they're about the same age. From a distance they look like siblings who parted ways later in life. One is a man of the city, the other a familiar face in the local town. Their graying hair suggests they're somewhere about forty. Their stone cold expressions suggest that they are in possession of a common secret. They are nothing but mere spectators but they are needed to answer far more important questions regarding certain matters.
"Have you received instructions from Mr. Sasaki as well?" He asked.
"No. I told him I would be back. Turns out he didn't have a thing for waiting."
A smile came to his face, "The impatience of old men could be really something."
By the end of the funeral Mr. Sasaki's family thanked the services of Shunji and entrusted everything to him to complete the rest of the old man's instructions. When the house was finally empty, he and Sakutaro finished the rest of the old man's whiskey.
"How did you know, Mr. Sasaki?" Shunji asked.
"My friend knew him when they were young. He was born in Hiroshima. I'm an aging man myself and this remains to be the strangest story I have so far. I don't know if you will get to keep up with me."
To the sound of Nobuo Nishimoto's "Japanese Rumba", Shunji filled their glasses.
"Indulge me."
submitted by HaHaHashimoto to WritersGroup [link] [comments]
(Title: Sunset in the Year 24. Prologue. Words: 1030)
It is the second funeral to take place in the same house in a month. Two weeks ago, Sasaki Shintaro buried his wife after spending several days in hospital care. Yesterday morning, he was found dead in his kitchen wearing his old military uniform next to an open box of keepsakes, a half empty bottle of whiskey and the sound of Nobuo Nishimoto's "Japanese Rumba" skipping on the record player. There was no sign of forced entry, no missing items and no further evidence to suggest suicide. He looked more drunk than dead.The rest of his family decided there's no need to take the matter further with the local police. After all, he was eighty-five years old. For anyone, it is a ripe age for death. A normal one even. The family is just relieved that the body was found right away as it is normal these days for the dead to gradually decay with their possessions. It is easy to conclude that Mr. Sasaki had lived a full life. For nearly four decades he was a staple of daily life in Nagara as one of its oldest shopkeepers. The whole town was in grief but with a sense of relief. Mr. Sasaki finally joined his wife shortly and that was comforting news somehow. He is survived by his four children along with ten grandchildren and four great grandchildren.
Go Shunji, the funeral director, was not surprised. Oftentimes in the case of older couples it is normal that spouses follow each other in the course of death. For him, Mr. Sasaki's death is one of the peaceful ones he had ever seen. Any man approaching such an age could only wish to die like he did: peaceful with a certain sense of satisfaction in the life he lived and the acceptance that it is to be taken with no hesitation. It was in all sense of the word, natural.Right after the death of his wife, Mr. Sasaki turned to him as a new kind of confidante. His children was never aware of any of his last requests or instructions regarding his death. All of these details were entrusted to him. The first thing to do was to make sure that by the time his family comes to the house, all they would do is mourn. As he ran the funeral from the sidelines, he was approached by a man that was rumored to be the last person Mr. Sasaki had spoken to the day before he died. The last man who entered his shop and into his house by sundown. According to neighbors, Mr.Sasaki had greeted the man out around nine in the evening, giving him an embrace a father would give to a son. A man that he guessed was included in the set of instructions that was handed to him.
"Nomiya, isn't it?"
"Yes."
The two men moved their eyes to the scene of the ceremony.
"They say you're the last man who saw him alive."
"From the looks of it, yes."
Shunji figured they're about the same age. From a distance they look like siblings who parted ways later in life. One is a man of the city, the other a familiar face in the local town. Their graying hair suggests they're somewhere about forty. Their stone cold expressions suggest that they are in possession of a common secret. They are nothing but mere spectators but they are needed to answer far more important questions regarding certain matters.
"Have you received instructions from Mr. Sasaki as well?" He asked.
"No. I told him I would be back. Turns out he didn't have a thing for waiting."
A smile came to his face, "The impatience of old men could be really something."
Nomiya Sakutaro was surprised by the news of Mr. Sasaki's passing but was also relieved. After all, the only thing the old man kept talking about that night is how he was finally going to die. He never spoke of how it would come or if he was going to do it by himself. All he said was that the time has come. He was happy and that unlike other men, he was able to do everything that was expected of him and therefore the universe had no use for him anymore. It was rare to hear an old man use the construct of the universe but Mr. Sasaki had been a firm believer. He contended that among all the things in the world that mortals brought themselves to believe in, it was the universe that had been consistent. God listens but he never acts on his promises. If anything God delivers poorly. Meanwhile, the universe is indifferent. It never offers anything but a sense of clarity. It reminds mortals that they are beings who has to suffer circumstances that was out of their undoing. And perhaps the reason why it is easier to believe in God was because mortals can be arrogant enough to never answer for themselves, hence they say that anything unfortunate is just nothing but God's will.That night, the old man told him that he will be back. Rather, he should come back. For Sakutaro, Mr. Sasaki was an admirable man. A war veteran who lost everything over a cause he was indifferent with. At every course of tragedy he made an effort to keep on starting again and never complained. He never told anyone he was better than everybody, let alone that he is entitled in life because he had diligently paid his dues.
By the end of the funeral Mr. Sasaki's family thanked the services of Shunji and entrusted everything to him to complete the rest of the old man's instructions. When the house was finally empty, he and Sakutaro finished the rest of the old man's whiskey.
"How did you know, Mr. Sasaki?" Shunji asked.
"My friend knew him when they were young. He was born in Hiroshima. I'm an aging man myself and this remains to be the strangest story I have so far. I don't know if you will get to keep up with me."
To the sound of Nobuo Nishimoto's "Japanese Rumba", Shunji filled their glasses.
"Indulge me."
2023.03.31 07:45 Restless_Dill16 Is this a weird expectation to have in a relationship?
So, I've (24M) never been in a relationship. However, it is something I've thought about.
Lately, I've been thinking about what I would want if I were to date a guy. Specifically I've thought about how things would work sexually. I might be ace spec (to what degree I don't know) as well, but if that is the case, I might still be open to the act. That said, I've never been interested in having sex orally or in the rear. I wouldn't feel comfortable going that with a woman, either.
When I started questioning my sexuality, I didn't know how men had sex with men. [Context: I had abstinence-only sex ed in middle school. My parents didn't give me the talk, either; I was so disinterested in dating in high school I guess they didn't see the point.] When I started engaging in self-pleasure, I would think about making out and rubbing fronts against each other, if you know what I mean. It was weird at first, but I thought I'd be open to doing that with a guy. However, I saw a graphic on a Facebook blog showing how guys do it in the rear. That was confusing because even though that type of intercourse turned me off, I still liked guys (I didn't know about the split attraction model at the time).
It wasn't until last summer that I learned that dry humping AKA frottage is a valid way to have sex. While it's still possible I'm asexual, I'm open to having sex that way. I didn't know if that's a weird thing to want in a relationship and if I need to be upfront about that should I ever go steady with a dude.
Also, sorry for being a bit coy in my language. I come from a Christian background, so talking about sex openly still feels uncomfortable.
submitted by Restless_Dill16 to bisexual [link] [comments]
Lately, I've been thinking about what I would want if I were to date a guy. Specifically I've thought about how things would work sexually. I might be ace spec (to what degree I don't know) as well, but if that is the case, I might still be open to the act. That said, I've never been interested in having sex orally or in the rear. I wouldn't feel comfortable going that with a woman, either.
When I started questioning my sexuality, I didn't know how men had sex with men. [Context: I had abstinence-only sex ed in middle school. My parents didn't give me the talk, either; I was so disinterested in dating in high school I guess they didn't see the point.] When I started engaging in self-pleasure, I would think about making out and rubbing fronts against each other, if you know what I mean. It was weird at first, but I thought I'd be open to doing that with a guy. However, I saw a graphic on a Facebook blog showing how guys do it in the rear. That was confusing because even though that type of intercourse turned me off, I still liked guys (I didn't know about the split attraction model at the time).
It wasn't until last summer that I learned that dry humping AKA frottage is a valid way to have sex. While it's still possible I'm asexual, I'm open to having sex that way. I didn't know if that's a weird thing to want in a relationship and if I need to be upfront about that should I ever go steady with a dude.
Also, sorry for being a bit coy in my language. I come from a Christian background, so talking about sex openly still feels uncomfortable.
2023.03.31 07:45 EntertainerThick9903 i am terrified of the future . i don't want to go to college, i don't want to move on.
Ramadan is supposed to be a month where I should feel closer to Allah and more dedicated in my life to be a better muslim, except, I feel so lost, unworthy, and isolated.
(Please don't judge me. I am anonymous and none of you know me. I can't believe I have to ask people to be kind but I am scared of the response to this post.)
Ever since 6th grade (2017) I knew I was gay. I knew I was attracted to men and there was no changing how I felt about it. Of course, I did absolutely nothing about it. I went about my life as normal. But ever since I had entered high school, it has become harder and harder to hide myself.
My father is the type to make nasty homophobic jokes. The kinds that make you embarrassed to hear because it sounds awful to say such mean things about someone. He is a muslim man. I don't know what gave him the authority to be so rude and judgmental. He keeps on reminding me of college. He keeps telling me to make room in my life because I have to get married soon. I picture it a lot. A poor innocent woman who has to get married to a man in the closet. She does not deserve that. I also imagine the hateful things she would say to me if she were to find out.
If this post makes you angry, then I just know you would never understand what it is like to basically hide such a big part of your identity. Marriage isn't such a simple thing. You are dedicating your life to someone else, why does that person deserve to be lied to. I don't want to hide myself anymore. It makes me sick. it makes me frustrated it makes me scared makes me want to throw things and pull my hair. Don't even kid me with the "you're not born gay" because you are. i am gay and it's a fact and i'm TERRIFIED of it. so don't even school me because i know of the whole dont act upon it. I KNOW it but i can't live with it. I don't want to live hearing hateful words coming from my community. A community where i feel pushed to the side and left out everytime i read another hateful disgusting comment from a dedicated muslim about how I will burn in hell. So might as well make it easier for myslef and just do it. that way the muslim community doesn't have to feel insulted or repulsed by my actions or the gay community doesnt shame me for trying to get closer with God.
submitted by EntertainerThick9903 to SuicideWatch [link] [comments]
(Please don't judge me. I am anonymous and none of you know me. I can't believe I have to ask people to be kind but I am scared of the response to this post.)
Ever since 6th grade (2017) I knew I was gay. I knew I was attracted to men and there was no changing how I felt about it. Of course, I did absolutely nothing about it. I went about my life as normal. But ever since I had entered high school, it has become harder and harder to hide myself.
My father is the type to make nasty homophobic jokes. The kinds that make you embarrassed to hear because it sounds awful to say such mean things about someone. He is a muslim man. I don't know what gave him the authority to be so rude and judgmental. He keeps on reminding me of college. He keeps telling me to make room in my life because I have to get married soon. I picture it a lot. A poor innocent woman who has to get married to a man in the closet. She does not deserve that. I also imagine the hateful things she would say to me if she were to find out.
If this post makes you angry, then I just know you would never understand what it is like to basically hide such a big part of your identity. Marriage isn't such a simple thing. You are dedicating your life to someone else, why does that person deserve to be lied to. I don't want to hide myself anymore. It makes me sick. it makes me frustrated it makes me scared makes me want to throw things and pull my hair. Don't even kid me with the "you're not born gay" because you are. i am gay and it's a fact and i'm TERRIFIED of it. so don't even school me because i know of the whole dont act upon it. I KNOW it but i can't live with it. I don't want to live hearing hateful words coming from my community. A community where i feel pushed to the side and left out everytime i read another hateful disgusting comment from a dedicated muslim about how I will burn in hell. So might as well make it easier for myslef and just do it. that way the muslim community doesn't have to feel insulted or repulsed by my actions or the gay community doesnt shame me for trying to get closer with God.
2023.03.31 07:44 MjolnirPants Jerry and the Apocalypse: Part 61
Part 60
Julie Allard, CEO, Divine Crisis Management Group
Julie straightened up, the lines across her hips from the edge of the desk beginning to itch now that they were free. Bill collapsed back in his chair, opening a desk drawer to produce a box of tissues. He pulled a handful out to clean himself with.
"That was good," Julie purred, her knees shaking as she waited for Bill to finish so she could sit on his lap. Bill crumbled up the tissues and she plopped down. "Mmm, this is good, too," she said, leaning back against him.
"We could stay just like this for a while," Bill suggested.
"I wish," Julie said. "I'm going to start leaking soon... And we need to clean your desk." Bill leaned around her, seeing the mess on his desk. He chuckled. "I have to admit, I like the fact that I never have to worry about you faking it."
Julie snorted, then leaned against him.
"You gave me a funny look earlier," she said. "When the guys from the Army were here."
"Well, in my defense, a naked, beautiful woman stood up from under my desk while I was trying to talk shop with an old buddy of mine."
"Mmmhmm," Julie said. "It didn't have anything to do with the... Details of said naked woman?"
Bill looked at her. He reached forward, wiped a finger through the cooling bodily fluids on the desk and stuck it in his mouth.
"That only proves you're a pervert," Julie said with feigned primness.
"I'll drink it straight from the tap, then," Bill said, seizing her hips and plopping her on the desk. Julie squealed. "Not so soon, you ass!" Bill grinned at her.
"You'll make me giggle like a little girl," Julie tried to pout as she said it, but she couldn't stop grinning back at him.
"That only makes it more appealing," Bill said. Julie crossed her legs. "No! We can do that later. I need to go call in the rest of the guys your friend needed, anyways."
Bill glanced over at the potted plant with a small pile of fabric behind it. "Your clothes are over there," he said.
Julie finally managed to pout. "You're not going to get them for me?"
Bill eyed her legs. "Not as long as you've got that ass, no. I will never pick anything up off the floor for you."
Julie chuckled and stood, walking over to the plant and retrieving her clothes. She quickly dressed and arranged herself so as to minimize the evidence of a desktop tryst.
"How do I look?" she asked, turning for Bill's inspection.
"Harried," he said. "Which tracks with what's been going on. Also amazing, but that's par for the course."
She walked over as he finished buckling his own pants to kiss him. "I'll be back if I can. If not, I'll see you after work."
She turned to leave, but stopped when she heard Bill's voice. "Julie," he said. He sounded concerned. She turned to find him frowning.
"What is it?" His look worried her.
"It's Jerry," he said. "I think you might be too harsh on him."
Julie sighed. She tamped down on the twisting in her guts at his words and reminded herself that she needed to be objective.
"Explain," she said, her voice much colder than she intended.
"Julie," he said. "Haven't you noticed that virtually everyone who knows him has stood up for him? I mean, I know that the stuff Dylan told you sounds bad, and I know that you confirmed it. Hell, I know that him going rogue again looks bad... But there's got to be a reason so many people support him."
"He's nice to everyone he meets," Julie said. She had intended to go on, but she caught herself. She was making excuses. She was about to claim that the most awkward, easily-embarrassed wallflower of a man she'd ever met had simply charmed everyone else. And she damn well knew that wasn't the case. Sure, he could turn on an aura that would make women -and presumably gay men- go wild for him, but she was fairly certain he hadn't done so in years. He was self-conscious about even discussing the last time he had, even though she knew he'd had his memories erased at the time and was acting out of character, thanks to some kind of magical illness.
"I'll think about it, Bill," she said, her voice much softer.
"That's all I'm asking," he said. "And I'll support you, whatever decisions you come to."
She smiled at him. That part, she had no trouble believing.
"I'll see you later," she said.
"L- I mean, later, beautiful," he replied. His face twisted a little, but quickly returned to normal. Julie left, wondering what that look was about.
----
Julie went to the bathroom first. When she was done, she went to her office and sent out the emails to recall the men for the Army. She had just gotten those sent when she sensed a presence and looked up to find a woman sitting in the chair in front of her desk.
"Hello," Julie said, surprised.
"Hi," the woman responded. She wore a nice dress suit, much like Julie's own, except the woman still had her jacket on and buttoned. She had fair features and black hair with a red stripe in it.
"Can I help you?" Julie asked.
"No," the woman said.
They sat there for a moment, Julie edging a finger closer to the alarm rune on the underside of her desk.
"I'm here to help you," the woman said at length. There was something about her voice that seemed familiar, but Julie couldn't place it.
"Okay," Julie responded. "Can you explain how?"
"Yes. Listen to Bill about Jerry," the woman said. She leaned forward and the sense of vague familiarity hit Julie again. She was certain she knew this woman from somewhere.
"What did Bill say about Jerry?" Julie asked, carefully choosing her words to avoid any accidental admissions.
"That you're being too harsh on him," the woman said. She leaned forward some more, putting her elbows on her knees.
"Bill's right. You see, Bill is a very confident man. He's aware that other men might be better in bed, or better fighters, or better at their jobs than him. He doesn't really care. You pushing away Jerry isn't going to make him feel more secure in your relationship. He's not worried about you leaving him to return to the arrangement you had with Jerry and his wife. He knows you well enough to know you wouldn't want that. Being a fifth wheel, I mean."
Julie gasped as the recognition suddenly crystalized. "Jane," she breathed. Jane flashed her a tight smile and a little nod. "more or less," she said cryptically. Julie took that to mean this was an avatar.
"What can you tell me about everything that's happened?" Julie asked.
"Well, General Stanley's fears are justified, so don't hold back aiding him. Some of the gods are dissenting. A few will sit out the upcoming conflict. A few will side with humanity. A few more will side specifically with Jerry. In fact, they already have. Unfortunately, those who've sided with Jerry are probably not going to help us in this fight."
"And why? Why are they turning on us?"
"Because They're afraid of you. You have power now, and Jerry worked out a way to kill a god. They know if he can do it, another human can, as well. Some of the work your wizards are doing is shockingly close to what Jerry did. Most of them have turned against him, though not all. But in doing so, many have turned against humanity as a whole. They don't plan to let you have back the army you've sent to assist them. Most of them think that will be a serious blow to your might. They don't know it's just a small part of one army among many. And when they learn that, well... They're not going to grow any less afraid of you, that's for sure."
"You make out like the gods are a bunch of cowards," Julie said. Jane chuckled and nodded, crossing her arms.
"They are. They're scared of Jerry, scared of Sarisa, scared of you, scared of me and Yarm. Mostly me, but still. They'd be afraid of their own shadow, if they didn't know better. The gods have spent thousands of years being immortal and invincible. Only one god has ever truly died, and that was a massive fluke. They've never been given the chance to develop any courage. They're experiencing a threat for the first time ever, so their reaction is to attack everything until there's nothing left to threaten them."
"Except Yarm," Julie said. Jane nodded. "Except Yarm. And you can guess where he stands."
Yarm would stand with Jerry, no doubt. Julie knew that the two of them were as close as they could be without becoming lovers. "And what about Jerry?" she asked.
"Jerry is doing exactly what he needs to be doing right now. For himself, and for everyone else."
Julie nodded, taking that in. "And you? Where do you sit in this fight?"
Jane shrugged. "I was human until a few years ago. Old loyalties die hard."
Julie leaned back in her chair, relieved.
Jane stood. "I have to go. I have a lot on my plate, lately. There's no certainty, but I want you to know that things are on the right track, so far. As long as Sarisa doesn't have any more tricks up her sleeve, everything's going to work out."
"And if she does?" Julie asked, rising as well.
Jane shrugged again, making a sort of sneer that Julie recognized as a suppressed wince. "Then we'll either adapt or lose."
"And what happens if we lose?"
"The destruction of all the gods and the extinction of humanity. At least in this world."
"So, no pressure," Julie drawled. Jane grinned. "No pressure," she said. She turned to the door and opened it, then paused.
"Oh, one more thing..." She met Julie's eyes.
"Tell Bill that you're in love with him. He's been itching for 'the right time' to tell you, but you know how men are about that kind of stuff."
Julie gaped at the goddess as she left with a wink. A moment later, she returned to her computer and began typing more emails. She had a feeling that pulling out all the stops might be appropriate.
----
Command Sergeant Major Eric Hale, 5th Special Forces Group
"The president will see you now, Sergeant," the marine guard said. Hale stood and walked in. Hale walked into the conference room to find the POTUS and a Navy Admiral shaking hands.
"Thank you, Fred," the President said. The Admiral nodded and walked out as Hale snapped to attention and saluted his Commander in Chief.
"Knock it off," the President told him, pulling out a chair, and then walking around the table to take one opposite. "Take a seat. I've been on my feet all day."
"Thank you, sir," Hale said as he sat down and scooted his chair in.
"I'm told you have a message for me from General Stanley."
Hale nodded. "Yes, sir. I was to give you his message verbatim. It goes as follows: 'Sir, if this shit goes down and we don't throw everything we have at it in one big mass, right off the bat, I do not think we will survive'. End of message."
The President nodded.
"I expected this, you know," he said. "The folks from the DCM -including that guy from the television show and the woman who produces it- were fairly apocalyptic in their description of events."
The President heaved a big sigh. "That was Admiral Strang. He happened to be in the building, so he personally reported to me that the second and third battalion of the Tenth Special Forces just arrived stateside on naval flights. They're preparing to be deployed as we speak."
"Sir, with all due respect, I think we're going to need more than just two more battalions of quiet professionals. We're going to need a complete mobilization. I just came from the DCM, and they promised me a hundred wizards and over four hundred shooters with magic gear. I think we're going to need more, sir. A lot more."
"A total war footing," the President said. "That's what you're talking about. A return to a World-War-Two era economy."
"Sir, I couldn't speak to economic concerns, but I have the upmost faith in the General's judgement."
"You and me both, Sergeant," the President said with a sigh. He sighed again a moment later.
"Okay, Sergeant. My break is over, I need to get moving. You can tell the General I'm doing everything I can. If you want to return to the waiting room, I'll send a Marine to escort you to the helipad and you can take the chopper over to Fort Carson. I'll send instructions for Colonels Macy and Gibbs to follow your lead."
"Thank you, sir," Hale said, standing up. He snapped another salute, but the President stuck out his hand.
"Thank you, Sergeant. You and every single one of the men out there right now, and all of those heading there today and in the future. Your service is an inspiration to all of us. I know you hear empty platitudes from politicians all the time, but I want to personally assure you that I mean it."
"You served yourself, sir," Hale said, shaking the President's hand.
"I did. In Afghanistan. It seems like forever ago."
"Then thank you, Mister President," Hale said. The President laughed.
"Yeah, thank me, too. Go on. I'm a busy man, Sergeant."
Hale hurried out, back to the waiting room. He had barely sat down before a Marine Gunnery Sergeant walked into the room. "Sergeant Hale?" he asked.
Hale stood. "This way, si- Sergeant," the Marine said.
"Do I have to say it, Gunny?" Hale asked.
"Nope," the Marine responded. "I'm kicking myself already."
----
President James Carter
James' staff met him as he left the conference room. "Okay," he asked Marcy, to his left. "Who's next?"
"Director Stillman, sir," she said. James sighed with relief. "Good. Hopefully he's got some good news for us."
He followed Marcy through the halls, to one of the secured meeting rooms. Inside, he found Frank Stillman, Director of Central Intelligence.
"Frank, please tell me you've got good news," James said as he shook his old friend's hand.
"Well, that depends on what you need the news for. Word is that we're going to war. Like World War Three. Is that true?"
"Jesus, you guys work fast," James breathed. "I literally just came from hearing about it."
"Ways and means, sir," Frank said. James chuckled ruefully.
"So yeah, I wanted to know about project Hoplite."
"Hoplite is ahead of schedule. We can field the first cadre, already. The second will be ready in a month."
"Good. What about project, uh..." James snapped his fingers. "Project Merlos, sir?"
"Yes, I could never remember that name. We should have just called it 'Merlin'. Or maybe 'Gandalf'."
"We almost called it Project Dresden, sir, but we've had one of those already."
"I don't even want to know. So how far along is Merlos?"
"We have four cadres ready right now. That's about three hundred and sixty men."
"That'll be a big help. How fast can they get organized?"
"They're prepping now, sir. They'll be ready to go within the hour. I had planned to have them travel ahead."
"Good, good. And you know I have to ask about the last one."
Frank's face split into a grin. "Project Tarragon, sir."
"That's the one."
Frank's grin grew wider. "Six," he said. James' jaw dropped. "Six?!"
"Yes, sir. Ready to go right this instant."
"Shit, the NRF riders must be fast learners."
"There's a sort of bonding that happens. By training the riders first, we can have another two ready two months from the next hatch."
"You look pretty pleased with yourself," James noted. Frank winked. "I am, sir. These projects have been my baby for the past few years. Having them come to fruition right as they're needed, well... I'm eager to see them in action."
"Don't be too eager. I'm told that if we don't win this one, we go extinct."
"Extinction has shades of gray, sir. If things get too bad, well, we've got a plan for that, too."
"Oh?" James quirked an eyebrow at him. "Do tell."
"Well, sir. You see, me and Jerry go way back. I was his boss when he worked for the Agency."
"I'm aware," James said. Frank smiled.
"Well, he and I got on quite well. So well, in fact, that neither of us wanted to end our professional relationship when he left for the private sector. As a result, we've been in touch about important matters. The last thing he contacted me about was a sort of extra dimensional bunker, set up by the gods to preserve humanity in the event of some extinction-level event. Except the gods don't really seem to know about it. Well, except one, and I've been given assurances that she's sympathetic to our cause."
"Well, that does sound useful."
Frank's smile turned into a grin that split his face from ear to ear. "We've also taken the liberty of adding some extra defenses, sir. If we can hold out for two more months, in addition to the two new Tarragon pairs, I can provide you with a bunker from which any continuing war effort can be directed in perfect safety."
"Well, shit, don't let me keep you, then. Have your project's soldiers travel to the other side as quickly as possible, and report their capabilities and needs to General Stanley."
"Right away, sir."
Frank walked out without another word. A very efficient man, that one, James thought. He stepped outside to find Marcy and the others waiting.
"Next?" he said with a sigh.
----
Bill Martin, All in All, Having a Pretty Good Day
Bill finished up the rest of his work and shut down his computer. Eric was as set as he could be. Gear for a thousand DCM security agents was being shipped to the Army camp, and hundreds of wizards and security agents (with their own gear, of course) were heading there as well, some already moving, others heading out in the days to come.
He stretched his back and then angled his desk lamp to be sure he'd cleaned up the mess from earlier. As he nodded to himself in satisfaction, he heard the door opening and looked up. Julie was there, her shirt half-unbuttoned and her hair a bit more of a mess than he remembered leaving it in.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
"Yes, just..." She sighed. "It's been a long day."
"I rather enjoyed lunch," Bill said. "Though I'm still hungry, for some reason..." Julie smiled at him.
"You know, there's probably no-one left in the office who might come knocking..." Bill said, suggestively.
"I know," Julie said, indicating her shirt. "But before we get to that, I need you to do something. In a professional capacity, I mean."
Bill's eager grin faded, replaced by his business expression, which some people tended to find intimidating for some reason. He scratched one heavily cauliflowered ear and idly wondered why as he waited for Julie to go on. For her part, she seemed reluctant to say it.
Finally, she worked up the nerve. "I want you to take a team. Six security, six wizards. The best, even if you have to recall them from the other side. I mean, the best we have. Take them and go find Jerry, and assist him with whatever he needs. Here," she reached into the pocket of the jacket slung over one arm and produced a compass.
"What's this?" Bill asked, accepting the compass.
"It will lead you directly to him. He gave it to me once, in case..."
"In case you needed to get laid?" Bill asked, his expression still all business. "I'm sorry, that sounded bitter. I mean, I don't understand why you'd need to find him."
"In case I needed to have him killed," Julie blurted out. "He made it and gave it to me. I think he made a few and gave them to the people he trusted."
"And he trusted you with one," Bill said. Julie winced.
"I'm not jealous," Bill said.
"What?" Julie asked.
"I'm not jealous, I said. I know you two used to have some kind of a thing going, and I know he's probably some kind of inhuman lover. But I can live with the fact that you were his sidepiece for a while."
Julie winced again.
"Sorry," Bill said. "My mouth is bad at translating what's in my head sometimes. I just mean to say that I've never had a problem with you and him working together, or even being friends. I know there wasn't any... Romance there."
"Are you... Is there romance here?" Julie asked him in a quiet voice.
"I sure as shit hope so, or I'm in for a really bad time," Bill said. He wanted to say something else, but it was hard to just jump to that.
Julie giggled.
"What?" Bill asked.
"Nothing, it was just something someone said to me earlier today."
She stepped forward, her body pressed to his and kissed him.
"I love you, Bill Martin," she whispered.
"I lo- Wow. Uh, I wasn't expecting that..." he muttered, his thick neck turning a bright shade of red.
"Sounds like maybe you were," Julie said.
"Motherfucker," Bill swore. "Julie, I've had a crush on you since the moment we met. At my interview. I saw you sitting there and afterwards, when I went home, I couldn't get that image out of my head. And I... I'm... I've been in love with you since that morning at the diner, when that asshat kept running his mouth."
Julie smiled at him. "So you love me?"
"Yeah," Bill said. Something snapped inside his chest and he seized her face in his hands and kissed her deeply. Her lips felt different, warmer, softer than he remembered. The skin of her cheeks under his calloused thumbs was smoother, fuller. The feeling of her body pressed up against his was...
It felt like coming home, he thought.
They kissed for a long moment before Bill drew back. "I uh..." he stammered.
"You need to get your team together," Julie said.
"Yeah," he responded, looking around as if they were here, waiting for him.
He clutched the compass to his chest. "I saw Michelle's report," he said. "From what she said, he's moving across planes."
"Stacey Compton is probably the most talented plane walker we have," Julie said. "And she's been working on the teleporter improvements. She should still be here."
Bill nodded. "I'll grab her. She got a rave review from one of the security teams when she was doing field work. Cool head under pressure. I still need to figure out the rest."
"You can leave in the morning, you know," Julie said. Bill met her gaze, and saw the twinkle there.
"The door's still open," he said.
"I thought you said there wasn't anyone left to disturb us..." Julie said teasingly. Bill grinned. "In that case, the couch in the lobby is bound to be more comfortable than my desk."
Julie took his hand and led him out of the office.
----
Bill woke up and froze, the unfamiliarity of his surroundings speeding up his heart. But only for a second. He recognized Julie's bedroom. His hand brushed her sleeping back as the memories of last night returned. His eyes went to the dresser, where his handgun, wallet, and a small compass were laid out.
They'd had dinner, then come back here and enjoyed their third tryst of the day before falling asleep in each others arms. He remembered the words they'd shared, and tried them out again on her sleeping back.
"I love you," he said. Julie murmured something and pulled the hand he'd placed on her hip down over her belly. He gave her a moment to cuddle, then gently extricated his hand and climbed out of bed. He jumped in the shower and washed quickly. A small pump bottle of brightly colored body wash-slash-shampoo and conditioner, obviously marketed to men, sat unopened to one side, so he cracked that one and used it.
He climbed out and dried himself off, and found Julie still asleep when he emerged. She'd rolled onto her back and lay stretched out on the bed, her hair a chestnut halo around her head, like some kind of angel. He considered snapping a picture, but the blankets were tangled around her knees, and he didn't want to do something that would piss her off, like taking nude photos of her sleeping. But he really wanted to remember this, so he stared for a long moment before getting dressed.
"Mmm, leaving?" Julie murmured as he pulled his boots on.
"Was gonna wake you up, see if you wanted to get breakfast before I go," he said.
"Mmmmmmm," she responded, her eyes still closed. She reached out and seized his forearm gently.
"Mmm, I love you," she said. Bill grinned down at her, barely able to stand how gorgeous and adorable she was.
"I love you, too," he said.
Her eyes snapped open. "I wanna get breakfast," she said.
"Okay, then come on," he replied.
She sat up, rubbing her eyes. "I need a shower," she said.
"Clock's ticking," Bill noted. She swung her legs out of bed, then slumped.
"Fuck the shower, you have to go, soon."
"Yeah," Bill agreed sadly.
"Okay, lemme brush my teeth, at least." She stood and padded into the bathroom, so Bill sat patiently on the bed and waited. She emerged a few minutes later. "Clothes," she said, then turned to the closet as if she'd just remembered that clothes were a thing. She dug out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and quickly pulled them on.
"I'll wear sandals," she said, grabbing a pair of large-framed sunglasses from her dresser. "Come on."
They went to a diner two blocks away that they'd visited a few times before. Breakfast was ordered, delivered and eaten, coffee was poured, fawned over, and drank quickly. Finally, Julie settled the bill.
"Bill," she said. "When you get there, tell him I'm sorry, okay? I was... Part of it was personal reasons. I kinda wanted to push him away. So you could..."
"So I could get closer?" Bill asked. she nodded.
"I'll tell him."
They stood and walked outside. At Bill's car, he stopped and turned. "Are you sure you don't want a ride home?"
"Yeah, this is a safe neighborhood. And I've still got that handgun in my purse. And it's only two blocks. You need to get moving, as much as I want to draw this out."
Bill nodded. He stroked her hair, then pulled some of it to his face and breathed deeply.
"Yuck," Julie said. "I haven't washed it."
"It smells like you," Bill said. "Best thing I've ever smelled."
"Ahh, that's right. We haven't been out for tacos yet," Julie said. Bill chuckled.
"You don't have any jewelry on," he said, disappointed. Julie cocked her head at him. "Is that a problem?"
"I guess not, I just... I wanted something of you. To bring with me. I'm damn sure I'm riding into a fight."
"Give me your knife," Julie said. Bill's eyebrows rose, but he complied, handing over the razor-sharp Benchmade he kept clipped to his belt. She unfolded it, seized a lock of her hair and chopped it off in a quick motion. Bill gasped.
"Your hair!" he said. Julie handed him the knife back and carefully began to tie the hair into a complex knot.
"I was about to cut it short, anyways. I like to change it up from time to time. Here," she handed him the small ring of braided hair, and he took it. Bill looked at it, then up at Julie.
"I love you," he said again.
Julie beamed at him. "I love you, too. Now let me go get in the shower. I've got to get to the office." She kissed him once on the lips and spun on her heels, striding away quickly. Bill climbed in the driver's seat and looked up to see she'd stopped and was watching him.
He raised the hair and kissed it. She smiled, blushed and turned away.
submitted by MjolnirPants to JerryandtheGoddesses [link] [comments]
Julie Allard, CEO, Divine Crisis Management Group
Julie straightened up, the lines across her hips from the edge of the desk beginning to itch now that they were free. Bill collapsed back in his chair, opening a desk drawer to produce a box of tissues. He pulled a handful out to clean himself with.
"That was good," Julie purred, her knees shaking as she waited for Bill to finish so she could sit on his lap. Bill crumbled up the tissues and she plopped down. "Mmm, this is good, too," she said, leaning back against him.
"We could stay just like this for a while," Bill suggested.
"I wish," Julie said. "I'm going to start leaking soon... And we need to clean your desk." Bill leaned around her, seeing the mess on his desk. He chuckled. "I have to admit, I like the fact that I never have to worry about you faking it."
Julie snorted, then leaned against him.
"You gave me a funny look earlier," she said. "When the guys from the Army were here."
"Well, in my defense, a naked, beautiful woman stood up from under my desk while I was trying to talk shop with an old buddy of mine."
"Mmmhmm," Julie said. "It didn't have anything to do with the... Details of said naked woman?"
Bill looked at her. He reached forward, wiped a finger through the cooling bodily fluids on the desk and stuck it in his mouth.
"That only proves you're a pervert," Julie said with feigned primness.
"I'll drink it straight from the tap, then," Bill said, seizing her hips and plopping her on the desk. Julie squealed. "Not so soon, you ass!" Bill grinned at her.
"You'll make me giggle like a little girl," Julie tried to pout as she said it, but she couldn't stop grinning back at him.
"That only makes it more appealing," Bill said. Julie crossed her legs. "No! We can do that later. I need to go call in the rest of the guys your friend needed, anyways."
Bill glanced over at the potted plant with a small pile of fabric behind it. "Your clothes are over there," he said.
Julie finally managed to pout. "You're not going to get them for me?"
Bill eyed her legs. "Not as long as you've got that ass, no. I will never pick anything up off the floor for you."
Julie chuckled and stood, walking over to the plant and retrieving her clothes. She quickly dressed and arranged herself so as to minimize the evidence of a desktop tryst.
"How do I look?" she asked, turning for Bill's inspection.
"Harried," he said. "Which tracks with what's been going on. Also amazing, but that's par for the course."
She walked over as he finished buckling his own pants to kiss him. "I'll be back if I can. If not, I'll see you after work."
She turned to leave, but stopped when she heard Bill's voice. "Julie," he said. He sounded concerned. She turned to find him frowning.
"What is it?" His look worried her.
"It's Jerry," he said. "I think you might be too harsh on him."
Julie sighed. She tamped down on the twisting in her guts at his words and reminded herself that she needed to be objective.
"Explain," she said, her voice much colder than she intended.
"Julie," he said. "Haven't you noticed that virtually everyone who knows him has stood up for him? I mean, I know that the stuff Dylan told you sounds bad, and I know that you confirmed it. Hell, I know that him going rogue again looks bad... But there's got to be a reason so many people support him."
"He's nice to everyone he meets," Julie said. She had intended to go on, but she caught herself. She was making excuses. She was about to claim that the most awkward, easily-embarrassed wallflower of a man she'd ever met had simply charmed everyone else. And she damn well knew that wasn't the case. Sure, he could turn on an aura that would make women -and presumably gay men- go wild for him, but she was fairly certain he hadn't done so in years. He was self-conscious about even discussing the last time he had, even though she knew he'd had his memories erased at the time and was acting out of character, thanks to some kind of magical illness.
"I'll think about it, Bill," she said, her voice much softer.
"That's all I'm asking," he said. "And I'll support you, whatever decisions you come to."
She smiled at him. That part, she had no trouble believing.
"I'll see you later," she said.
"L- I mean, later, beautiful," he replied. His face twisted a little, but quickly returned to normal. Julie left, wondering what that look was about.
----
Julie went to the bathroom first. When she was done, she went to her office and sent out the emails to recall the men for the Army. She had just gotten those sent when she sensed a presence and looked up to find a woman sitting in the chair in front of her desk.
"Hello," Julie said, surprised.
"Hi," the woman responded. She wore a nice dress suit, much like Julie's own, except the woman still had her jacket on and buttoned. She had fair features and black hair with a red stripe in it.
"Can I help you?" Julie asked.
"No," the woman said.
They sat there for a moment, Julie edging a finger closer to the alarm rune on the underside of her desk.
"I'm here to help you," the woman said at length. There was something about her voice that seemed familiar, but Julie couldn't place it.
"Okay," Julie responded. "Can you explain how?"
"Yes. Listen to Bill about Jerry," the woman said. She leaned forward and the sense of vague familiarity hit Julie again. She was certain she knew this woman from somewhere.
"What did Bill say about Jerry?" Julie asked, carefully choosing her words to avoid any accidental admissions.
"That you're being too harsh on him," the woman said. She leaned forward some more, putting her elbows on her knees.
"Bill's right. You see, Bill is a very confident man. He's aware that other men might be better in bed, or better fighters, or better at their jobs than him. He doesn't really care. You pushing away Jerry isn't going to make him feel more secure in your relationship. He's not worried about you leaving him to return to the arrangement you had with Jerry and his wife. He knows you well enough to know you wouldn't want that. Being a fifth wheel, I mean."
Julie gasped as the recognition suddenly crystalized. "Jane," she breathed. Jane flashed her a tight smile and a little nod. "more or less," she said cryptically. Julie took that to mean this was an avatar.
"What can you tell me about everything that's happened?" Julie asked.
"Well, General Stanley's fears are justified, so don't hold back aiding him. Some of the gods are dissenting. A few will sit out the upcoming conflict. A few will side with humanity. A few more will side specifically with Jerry. In fact, they already have. Unfortunately, those who've sided with Jerry are probably not going to help us in this fight."
"And why? Why are they turning on us?"
"Because They're afraid of you. You have power now, and Jerry worked out a way to kill a god. They know if he can do it, another human can, as well. Some of the work your wizards are doing is shockingly close to what Jerry did. Most of them have turned against him, though not all. But in doing so, many have turned against humanity as a whole. They don't plan to let you have back the army you've sent to assist them. Most of them think that will be a serious blow to your might. They don't know it's just a small part of one army among many. And when they learn that, well... They're not going to grow any less afraid of you, that's for sure."
"You make out like the gods are a bunch of cowards," Julie said. Jane chuckled and nodded, crossing her arms.
"They are. They're scared of Jerry, scared of Sarisa, scared of you, scared of me and Yarm. Mostly me, but still. They'd be afraid of their own shadow, if they didn't know better. The gods have spent thousands of years being immortal and invincible. Only one god has ever truly died, and that was a massive fluke. They've never been given the chance to develop any courage. They're experiencing a threat for the first time ever, so their reaction is to attack everything until there's nothing left to threaten them."
"Except Yarm," Julie said. Jane nodded. "Except Yarm. And you can guess where he stands."
Yarm would stand with Jerry, no doubt. Julie knew that the two of them were as close as they could be without becoming lovers. "And what about Jerry?" she asked.
"Jerry is doing exactly what he needs to be doing right now. For himself, and for everyone else."
Julie nodded, taking that in. "And you? Where do you sit in this fight?"
Jane shrugged. "I was human until a few years ago. Old loyalties die hard."
Julie leaned back in her chair, relieved.
Jane stood. "I have to go. I have a lot on my plate, lately. There's no certainty, but I want you to know that things are on the right track, so far. As long as Sarisa doesn't have any more tricks up her sleeve, everything's going to work out."
"And if she does?" Julie asked, rising as well.
Jane shrugged again, making a sort of sneer that Julie recognized as a suppressed wince. "Then we'll either adapt or lose."
"And what happens if we lose?"
"The destruction of all the gods and the extinction of humanity. At least in this world."
"So, no pressure," Julie drawled. Jane grinned. "No pressure," she said. She turned to the door and opened it, then paused.
"Oh, one more thing..." She met Julie's eyes.
"Tell Bill that you're in love with him. He's been itching for 'the right time' to tell you, but you know how men are about that kind of stuff."
Julie gaped at the goddess as she left with a wink. A moment later, she returned to her computer and began typing more emails. She had a feeling that pulling out all the stops might be appropriate.
----
Command Sergeant Major Eric Hale, 5th Special Forces Group
"The president will see you now, Sergeant," the marine guard said. Hale stood and walked in. Hale walked into the conference room to find the POTUS and a Navy Admiral shaking hands.
"Thank you, Fred," the President said. The Admiral nodded and walked out as Hale snapped to attention and saluted his Commander in Chief.
"Knock it off," the President told him, pulling out a chair, and then walking around the table to take one opposite. "Take a seat. I've been on my feet all day."
"Thank you, sir," Hale said as he sat down and scooted his chair in.
"I'm told you have a message for me from General Stanley."
Hale nodded. "Yes, sir. I was to give you his message verbatim. It goes as follows: 'Sir, if this shit goes down and we don't throw everything we have at it in one big mass, right off the bat, I do not think we will survive'. End of message."
The President nodded.
"I expected this, you know," he said. "The folks from the DCM -including that guy from the television show and the woman who produces it- were fairly apocalyptic in their description of events."
The President heaved a big sigh. "That was Admiral Strang. He happened to be in the building, so he personally reported to me that the second and third battalion of the Tenth Special Forces just arrived stateside on naval flights. They're preparing to be deployed as we speak."
"Sir, with all due respect, I think we're going to need more than just two more battalions of quiet professionals. We're going to need a complete mobilization. I just came from the DCM, and they promised me a hundred wizards and over four hundred shooters with magic gear. I think we're going to need more, sir. A lot more."
"A total war footing," the President said. "That's what you're talking about. A return to a World-War-Two era economy."
"Sir, I couldn't speak to economic concerns, but I have the upmost faith in the General's judgement."
"You and me both, Sergeant," the President said with a sigh. He sighed again a moment later.
"Okay, Sergeant. My break is over, I need to get moving. You can tell the General I'm doing everything I can. If you want to return to the waiting room, I'll send a Marine to escort you to the helipad and you can take the chopper over to Fort Carson. I'll send instructions for Colonels Macy and Gibbs to follow your lead."
"Thank you, sir," Hale said, standing up. He snapped another salute, but the President stuck out his hand.
"Thank you, Sergeant. You and every single one of the men out there right now, and all of those heading there today and in the future. Your service is an inspiration to all of us. I know you hear empty platitudes from politicians all the time, but I want to personally assure you that I mean it."
"You served yourself, sir," Hale said, shaking the President's hand.
"I did. In Afghanistan. It seems like forever ago."
"Then thank you, Mister President," Hale said. The President laughed.
"Yeah, thank me, too. Go on. I'm a busy man, Sergeant."
Hale hurried out, back to the waiting room. He had barely sat down before a Marine Gunnery Sergeant walked into the room. "Sergeant Hale?" he asked.
Hale stood. "This way, si- Sergeant," the Marine said.
"Do I have to say it, Gunny?" Hale asked.
"Nope," the Marine responded. "I'm kicking myself already."
----
President James Carter
James' staff met him as he left the conference room. "Okay," he asked Marcy, to his left. "Who's next?"
"Director Stillman, sir," she said. James sighed with relief. "Good. Hopefully he's got some good news for us."
He followed Marcy through the halls, to one of the secured meeting rooms. Inside, he found Frank Stillman, Director of Central Intelligence.
"Frank, please tell me you've got good news," James said as he shook his old friend's hand.
"Well, that depends on what you need the news for. Word is that we're going to war. Like World War Three. Is that true?"
"Jesus, you guys work fast," James breathed. "I literally just came from hearing about it."
"Ways and means, sir," Frank said. James chuckled ruefully.
"So yeah, I wanted to know about project Hoplite."
"Hoplite is ahead of schedule. We can field the first cadre, already. The second will be ready in a month."
"Good. What about project, uh..." James snapped his fingers. "Project Merlos, sir?"
"Yes, I could never remember that name. We should have just called it 'Merlin'. Or maybe 'Gandalf'."
"We almost called it Project Dresden, sir, but we've had one of those already."
"I don't even want to know. So how far along is Merlos?"
"We have four cadres ready right now. That's about three hundred and sixty men."
"That'll be a big help. How fast can they get organized?"
"They're prepping now, sir. They'll be ready to go within the hour. I had planned to have them travel ahead."
"Good, good. And you know I have to ask about the last one."
Frank's face split into a grin. "Project Tarragon, sir."
"That's the one."
Frank's grin grew wider. "Six," he said. James' jaw dropped. "Six?!"
"Yes, sir. Ready to go right this instant."
"Shit, the NRF riders must be fast learners."
"There's a sort of bonding that happens. By training the riders first, we can have another two ready two months from the next hatch."
"You look pretty pleased with yourself," James noted. Frank winked. "I am, sir. These projects have been my baby for the past few years. Having them come to fruition right as they're needed, well... I'm eager to see them in action."
"Don't be too eager. I'm told that if we don't win this one, we go extinct."
"Extinction has shades of gray, sir. If things get too bad, well, we've got a plan for that, too."
"Oh?" James quirked an eyebrow at him. "Do tell."
"Well, sir. You see, me and Jerry go way back. I was his boss when he worked for the Agency."
"I'm aware," James said. Frank smiled.
"Well, he and I got on quite well. So well, in fact, that neither of us wanted to end our professional relationship when he left for the private sector. As a result, we've been in touch about important matters. The last thing he contacted me about was a sort of extra dimensional bunker, set up by the gods to preserve humanity in the event of some extinction-level event. Except the gods don't really seem to know about it. Well, except one, and I've been given assurances that she's sympathetic to our cause."
"Well, that does sound useful."
Frank's smile turned into a grin that split his face from ear to ear. "We've also taken the liberty of adding some extra defenses, sir. If we can hold out for two more months, in addition to the two new Tarragon pairs, I can provide you with a bunker from which any continuing war effort can be directed in perfect safety."
"Well, shit, don't let me keep you, then. Have your project's soldiers travel to the other side as quickly as possible, and report their capabilities and needs to General Stanley."
"Right away, sir."
Frank walked out without another word. A very efficient man, that one, James thought. He stepped outside to find Marcy and the others waiting.
"Next?" he said with a sigh.
----
Bill Martin, All in All, Having a Pretty Good Day
Bill finished up the rest of his work and shut down his computer. Eric was as set as he could be. Gear for a thousand DCM security agents was being shipped to the Army camp, and hundreds of wizards and security agents (with their own gear, of course) were heading there as well, some already moving, others heading out in the days to come.
He stretched his back and then angled his desk lamp to be sure he'd cleaned up the mess from earlier. As he nodded to himself in satisfaction, he heard the door opening and looked up. Julie was there, her shirt half-unbuttoned and her hair a bit more of a mess than he remembered leaving it in.
"Everything okay?" he asked.
"Yes, just..." She sighed. "It's been a long day."
"I rather enjoyed lunch," Bill said. "Though I'm still hungry, for some reason..." Julie smiled at him.
"You know, there's probably no-one left in the office who might come knocking..." Bill said, suggestively.
"I know," Julie said, indicating her shirt. "But before we get to that, I need you to do something. In a professional capacity, I mean."
Bill's eager grin faded, replaced by his business expression, which some people tended to find intimidating for some reason. He scratched one heavily cauliflowered ear and idly wondered why as he waited for Julie to go on. For her part, she seemed reluctant to say it.
Finally, she worked up the nerve. "I want you to take a team. Six security, six wizards. The best, even if you have to recall them from the other side. I mean, the best we have. Take them and go find Jerry, and assist him with whatever he needs. Here," she reached into the pocket of the jacket slung over one arm and produced a compass.
"What's this?" Bill asked, accepting the compass.
"It will lead you directly to him. He gave it to me once, in case..."
"In case you needed to get laid?" Bill asked, his expression still all business. "I'm sorry, that sounded bitter. I mean, I don't understand why you'd need to find him."
"In case I needed to have him killed," Julie blurted out. "He made it and gave it to me. I think he made a few and gave them to the people he trusted."
"And he trusted you with one," Bill said. Julie winced.
"I'm not jealous," Bill said.
"What?" Julie asked.
"I'm not jealous, I said. I know you two used to have some kind of a thing going, and I know he's probably some kind of inhuman lover. But I can live with the fact that you were his sidepiece for a while."
Julie winced again.
"Sorry," Bill said. "My mouth is bad at translating what's in my head sometimes. I just mean to say that I've never had a problem with you and him working together, or even being friends. I know there wasn't any... Romance there."
"Are you... Is there romance here?" Julie asked him in a quiet voice.
"I sure as shit hope so, or I'm in for a really bad time," Bill said. He wanted to say something else, but it was hard to just jump to that.
Julie giggled.
"What?" Bill asked.
"Nothing, it was just something someone said to me earlier today."
She stepped forward, her body pressed to his and kissed him.
"I love you, Bill Martin," she whispered.
"I lo- Wow. Uh, I wasn't expecting that..." he muttered, his thick neck turning a bright shade of red.
"Sounds like maybe you were," Julie said.
"Motherfucker," Bill swore. "Julie, I've had a crush on you since the moment we met. At my interview. I saw you sitting there and afterwards, when I went home, I couldn't get that image out of my head. And I... I'm... I've been in love with you since that morning at the diner, when that asshat kept running his mouth."
Julie smiled at him. "So you love me?"
"Yeah," Bill said. Something snapped inside his chest and he seized her face in his hands and kissed her deeply. Her lips felt different, warmer, softer than he remembered. The skin of her cheeks under his calloused thumbs was smoother, fuller. The feeling of her body pressed up against his was...
It felt like coming home, he thought.
They kissed for a long moment before Bill drew back. "I uh..." he stammered.
"You need to get your team together," Julie said.
"Yeah," he responded, looking around as if they were here, waiting for him.
He clutched the compass to his chest. "I saw Michelle's report," he said. "From what she said, he's moving across planes."
"Stacey Compton is probably the most talented plane walker we have," Julie said. "And she's been working on the teleporter improvements. She should still be here."
Bill nodded. "I'll grab her. She got a rave review from one of the security teams when she was doing field work. Cool head under pressure. I still need to figure out the rest."
"You can leave in the morning, you know," Julie said. Bill met her gaze, and saw the twinkle there.
"The door's still open," he said.
"I thought you said there wasn't anyone left to disturb us..." Julie said teasingly. Bill grinned. "In that case, the couch in the lobby is bound to be more comfortable than my desk."
Julie took his hand and led him out of the office.
----
Bill woke up and froze, the unfamiliarity of his surroundings speeding up his heart. But only for a second. He recognized Julie's bedroom. His hand brushed her sleeping back as the memories of last night returned. His eyes went to the dresser, where his handgun, wallet, and a small compass were laid out.
They'd had dinner, then come back here and enjoyed their third tryst of the day before falling asleep in each others arms. He remembered the words they'd shared, and tried them out again on her sleeping back.
"I love you," he said. Julie murmured something and pulled the hand he'd placed on her hip down over her belly. He gave her a moment to cuddle, then gently extricated his hand and climbed out of bed. He jumped in the shower and washed quickly. A small pump bottle of brightly colored body wash-slash-shampoo and conditioner, obviously marketed to men, sat unopened to one side, so he cracked that one and used it.
He climbed out and dried himself off, and found Julie still asleep when he emerged. She'd rolled onto her back and lay stretched out on the bed, her hair a chestnut halo around her head, like some kind of angel. He considered snapping a picture, but the blankets were tangled around her knees, and he didn't want to do something that would piss her off, like taking nude photos of her sleeping. But he really wanted to remember this, so he stared for a long moment before getting dressed.
"Mmm, leaving?" Julie murmured as he pulled his boots on.
"Was gonna wake you up, see if you wanted to get breakfast before I go," he said.
"Mmmmmmm," she responded, her eyes still closed. She reached out and seized his forearm gently.
"Mmm, I love you," she said. Bill grinned down at her, barely able to stand how gorgeous and adorable she was.
"I love you, too," he said.
Her eyes snapped open. "I wanna get breakfast," she said.
"Okay, then come on," he replied.
She sat up, rubbing her eyes. "I need a shower," she said.
"Clock's ticking," Bill noted. She swung her legs out of bed, then slumped.
"Fuck the shower, you have to go, soon."
"Yeah," Bill agreed sadly.
"Okay, lemme brush my teeth, at least." She stood and padded into the bathroom, so Bill sat patiently on the bed and waited. She emerged a few minutes later. "Clothes," she said, then turned to the closet as if she'd just remembered that clothes were a thing. She dug out a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and quickly pulled them on.
"I'll wear sandals," she said, grabbing a pair of large-framed sunglasses from her dresser. "Come on."
They went to a diner two blocks away that they'd visited a few times before. Breakfast was ordered, delivered and eaten, coffee was poured, fawned over, and drank quickly. Finally, Julie settled the bill.
"Bill," she said. "When you get there, tell him I'm sorry, okay? I was... Part of it was personal reasons. I kinda wanted to push him away. So you could..."
"So I could get closer?" Bill asked. she nodded.
"I'll tell him."
They stood and walked outside. At Bill's car, he stopped and turned. "Are you sure you don't want a ride home?"
"Yeah, this is a safe neighborhood. And I've still got that handgun in my purse. And it's only two blocks. You need to get moving, as much as I want to draw this out."
Bill nodded. He stroked her hair, then pulled some of it to his face and breathed deeply.
"Yuck," Julie said. "I haven't washed it."
"It smells like you," Bill said. "Best thing I've ever smelled."
"Ahh, that's right. We haven't been out for tacos yet," Julie said. Bill chuckled.
"You don't have any jewelry on," he said, disappointed. Julie cocked her head at him. "Is that a problem?"
"I guess not, I just... I wanted something of you. To bring with me. I'm damn sure I'm riding into a fight."
"Give me your knife," Julie said. Bill's eyebrows rose, but he complied, handing over the razor-sharp Benchmade he kept clipped to his belt. She unfolded it, seized a lock of her hair and chopped it off in a quick motion. Bill gasped.
"Your hair!" he said. Julie handed him the knife back and carefully began to tie the hair into a complex knot.
"I was about to cut it short, anyways. I like to change it up from time to time. Here," she handed him the small ring of braided hair, and he took it. Bill looked at it, then up at Julie.
"I love you," he said again.
Julie beamed at him. "I love you, too. Now let me go get in the shower. I've got to get to the office." She kissed him once on the lips and spun on her heels, striding away quickly. Bill climbed in the driver's seat and looked up to see she'd stopped and was watching him.
He raised the hair and kissed it. She smiled, blushed and turned away.
2023.03.31 07:38 velez_cool My wife [36f] is vehemently opposed to my [36m] interest in Islam
So, my wife and I are both from Catholic backgrounds, but we arenât very religious. We celebrate Catholic holidays and go to church a couple times a year. I love to travel, learn about new cultures and languages. Iâve always been this way and I speak a couple European languages, conversational Japanese that I learned for a vacation, and am currently studying Arabic for an upcoming vacation. I am taking Arabic lessons (totally non-religious) at a local mosque.
So, Iâve become pretty good friends with my teacher and am really learning Arabic as well. He has invited me to his house many times and Iâve gotten to know his friends as well.
These guys are just some great people. We just hang out for hours talking and eating small appetizer type dishes. They just open up and talk about very personal things and give each other advise and support. Iâve really opened up too, and Iâve never had this kind of support in my life. I care about these men a lot.
Anyway, a lot of times theyâve talked about how Islam has helped them deal with their problems. Iâve been very interested in learning more. I started taking an Islam class at the same mosque that Iâm studying Arabic and Iâm doing a kind of âpracticeâ Ramadan fasting. I feel very interested in the religion, although I definitely donât consider myself as being part of Islam at this time.
The biggest problem I have is that my wife does not agree at all with my interest in Islam. She says Iâm going to want her to wear hijab. Iâm going to become more controlling. Islam is not the correct religion. Sheâs never going to convert to Islam. Iâm getting brain washed. Itâs going to ruin our marriage because Iâm going to want a Muslim wife. Etc.
Look, I know I married a Catholic and thatâs not gonna change. There are things I donât agree with in Islam, especially about women. And there are things I donât agree with in Catholicism. But I could still be a Catholic. And I also reject certain things about Islam. I donât need for my wife to change anything about herself. She says that she married a Catholic in a Catholic ceremony. And changing my religion could potentially end the marriage. I get that, but I also think I have the right to explore other religions.
What do you guys think?
submitted by velez_cool to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
So, Iâve become pretty good friends with my teacher and am really learning Arabic as well. He has invited me to his house many times and Iâve gotten to know his friends as well.
These guys are just some great people. We just hang out for hours talking and eating small appetizer type dishes. They just open up and talk about very personal things and give each other advise and support. Iâve really opened up too, and Iâve never had this kind of support in my life. I care about these men a lot.
Anyway, a lot of times theyâve talked about how Islam has helped them deal with their problems. Iâve been very interested in learning more. I started taking an Islam class at the same mosque that Iâm studying Arabic and Iâm doing a kind of âpracticeâ Ramadan fasting. I feel very interested in the religion, although I definitely donât consider myself as being part of Islam at this time.
The biggest problem I have is that my wife does not agree at all with my interest in Islam. She says Iâm going to want her to wear hijab. Iâm going to become more controlling. Islam is not the correct religion. Sheâs never going to convert to Islam. Iâm getting brain washed. Itâs going to ruin our marriage because Iâm going to want a Muslim wife. Etc.
Look, I know I married a Catholic and thatâs not gonna change. There are things I donât agree with in Islam, especially about women. And there are things I donât agree with in Catholicism. But I could still be a Catholic. And I also reject certain things about Islam. I donât need for my wife to change anything about herself. She says that she married a Catholic in a Catholic ceremony. And changing my religion could potentially end the marriage. I get that, but I also think I have the right to explore other religions.
What do you guys think?
2023.03.31 07:27 ToadBrigade5 Slugma & Magcargo - Toad's Daily Pokémon Ranking, 218 & 219
 | Introducing the first pure Fire type to gain a subtype on evolution submitted by ToadBrigade5 to pokemon [link] [comments] 218: Slugma I'm just gonna get this out of the way. Slugma balls. Now that we've got our inner twelve year old out of system... Can I be honest? I don't know anything else about this Pokémon. It's... a slug made of lava. As interesting an idea as that is, I truly feel like it's a bit too easy to leave the Pokémon at that and that alone. It's a lava slug - you get what you came for and nothing else, and I can't really imagine anyone who came here and looked twice, unless they came to snicker at the name itself. That said, it's a bit of disservice to mock this too much, since it's a pre-evolution that's designed to look cute and introduce the idea. I don't really find it all that cute though? It looks more derpy than anything but I guess derpy is better than completely plain. Nonetheless, Slugma comes across to me as just a little too basic for comfort. When the Pokémon's entire existence is overshadowed by a bad joke, I think you've failed to really carve out your own niche. There's really nothing wrong with it, but if you've found something special in this creature... you're more observant than I am. C- Tier. Fanart found on Pinterest 219: Magcargo And the fire slug evolves into a fire snail! We got some magma rocks on it's back for a shell, and that makes a really neat way to justify the transition to rock type. That saaaaiiiid... It's a really really basic idea for how this Pokémon evolves. And once again, it remains only an elemental animal that doesn't introduce any other ideas beyond the addition of cooled magma rocks (despite apparently having a temperature that would melt those rocks and maybe the whole earth while it's at it? Man, the Pokedex is weird sometimes). Anyway. I think my problem with this line is that it doesn't go anywhere, do anything or express any kind of personality or meaning. It's too simple to sum it up. Even here, Macargo feels like a middle evolution meant to transition Slugma from a lava blob to something more interesting with stone plating or something. But it doesn't, at least not yet, and as a result it's just very forgettable and generic. Even if it was a transitional Pokemon, I would've wanted more from what it's supposed to be. Like... maybe you can play on the cargo part of the name, make it carry things through volcanoes or something, I don't know. As is, Magcargo isn't very different from Slugma and shares it's tiering - C- Tier. It's just below average by the standards of ideas the Pokémon company can and has come up with. That's all. Postscript: For information on this series like tier definitions, the archives, and rankings, see this master doc. The last post was on the Teddiursa line, which can be found here. If you'd like to see more content like this, also check out Emi's version which runs in parallel: Emi's Version. ~Toad |
2023.03.31 07:20 Over_Taste_8494 Zeenat Aman on Aging & why Older Women are not seen publicly. We need to stop super analysing middle aged actresses like Aishwarya, Madhuri etc as they are pushed to do drastic fillers, Botox etc. We are part of the problem. Thoughts đ
 | submitted by Over_Taste_8494 to BollyBlindsNGossip [link] [comments] |
2023.03.31 07:16 OutspokenFox Knight's Paradise
Life is like an eternal match between
God and His most cursed adversary!
Both fully conscious of eachâs presence
And aware of the plans of the other.
It is like an eternal chess battle
Between God and Satan that arose from
The origin of the abyssâs birth;
Whereupon God made light and birthed the Earth,
And with his first move created Adam
And from his rib Eve, where he foretold them
To exist in Paradise without end.
âââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
(Audio, on Youtube:) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpERoLmxNSU&t=3s
âââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
These two souls, most blissful and ignorant,
Are the twin sacred Knights, male and female,
Of the match of this masterful chess clash.
They are the Knights, most upright, tall and true
Who will guide us on past this journey through.
On this first move of God they rested, then
Crept about and roamed the Garden they dwelled,
Heeding Godâs command and staying true to
Their ordained path, blind ânânaĂŻve to their sight.
Yet Satan with his cunning and guile
On his first move resolved to take vengeance
Upon God for his wretched punishment.
And thus sent he his Queen, who is his wife
And daughter, who is also him, to sneak
Into the Garden and like a horrid
Serpent approach the Knights and deceive them,
With intent to lead them astray towards sin,
To fall from grace and from Paradise with
Intent to anger God for his divine
Punishment towards him and all of his kin.
The Queen of Satan says to the woman:
You will certainly not die for eating of the fruit!
But rather, like God and I,
Know good and evil!
The woman listened to the serpent in
The garden, and she handed the fruit to
Adam who was beside her then and now.
The Knights of God ate the forbidden fruit,
Gaining, indeed, such power as promised.
And upon this moment that it occurred
Lucifer smiled dearly, filled with joy
At Godâs Creationâs fall from high glory.
So was Satanâs move in this match of kings:
To lead astray mankind towards sin and death.
Yet now it is Godâs move,
And He is most displeased.
God is aware that Satan has led Man
Towards sin, and knows he intends to use this
To induce man to further its wages
And bring to Earth the wrath and flames of Hell
To exact most cruel revenge upon Him.
God is aware the man and the woman,
The two Knights He has bestowed His spirit,
Will be unable to resist against
The temptations of sin, and will plummet
To oblivion by Satanâs actions.
So He requests to His court a savior
To save a fallen and disgraced Mankind.
And His own Son nobly accepts His call.
In this match His Son represents the Queen
Of God, who He sends to sacrifice in
The place of mankind.
He sends His Queen, most powerful of all
Pieces, to sacrifice Herself for the
Two Knights that are mankind, who now in their
Arrogance dare to decide by themselves
What moves to perform without questioning
First God nor His almighty plan, and thus
In their folly led themselves to ruin.
Godâs Son dies for the sins of Man; The Queen
Of God sacrifices Herself to save
The chosen Knights of God from Satanâs wrath.
And Godâs Knights, man and woman, rest for now,
Saved from full woe by the tip of Godâs grace.
Yet now it is Satanâs move,
And he is most displeased.
Satan knows that God has sacrificed His
Son in an attempt to redeem mankind
For their sins.
He is still in possession, unlike God,
Of his Queen, His wife who is also his
Daughter who is also him.
He has used his own Knights to fortify
His every position, in contrast to
The bold and offensive moves of Godâs Knights,
Who because of their boldness are daring
In dispersing themselves in ways untold
To different parts of the alluring world.
So dispersed are they in their boldness that
They neglect to attend to their core in
Favor of busying themselves with more
Interesting and perplexing opinions,
Leaving the core of God and Godâs King who
Represents Him unattended to as
A result of His distance from His Men.
Satan is aware that God is thus most
Vulnerable, and that His core and His King
Are open to exploitation and woe.
He therefore sends his Queen to sneak into
The Castle of God, and to His most close
Angels whisper into their ear, to His
Rooks that were His Angels he said with such
Cleverness, and ever so cunningly
And reminiscent of that first tempting
of Eve, and Adam who stood beside her:
You can see very well how God treats you!
Look at how he has treated you thus far!
Look at your pieces! Your Knights who are Man
So bleak and lost, your Bishops who are Manâs
Shadows and Shadow so full of despair
And hopeless avarice, your Pawns who are
Nature and Her dominion so full of
Destruction and neuroticism, Look
At yourselves, O Rooks of Lord God, who are
Angels, So full of blind obedience
Crushed dreams, and wantonly stifled glory!
Does this not all concern you? Frighten
You? Anger you? Madden you? Bewilder
You? To see how God treats you? Ever so
Terribly and cruelly? Without regard
For the nature of being and meaning
As He rejects utterly the passions
Of every soul that lives and seeks power?
Does this not concern you so? For you can
See how God treats you! Look at how He has
Treated you thus far!
And the closest Angels of God listened
To the Queen of Satan and liked what she said.
So they agreed to help Satan stealth Godâs
Position, and thereupon destroy Him
Using the powers of knowledge of good
And evil possessed by Man in an act
Of final deception.
They cripple Godâs defenses and surround
His King with swift fury, daggering and
Wrathful at Him, full of threats towards His name.
Yet now it is Godâs turn to move.
God sees His defenses have been crippled
And that He is surrounded on all sides
By the work of His own dear Creation.
God is aware that Satan has turned Man
Against Him by telling Mankind of the
Nature of this world.
He is aware that His Sonâs sacrifice
No longer has any effect, since His
Sons and daughters no longer accept Him.
Knowing this He sits alone in Heaven
With all his infinite wisdom and plans.
He is aware that any attempts to
Save mankind with divine means will be of
No avail, since humanity will no
Longer accept divinity as the
Sole explanation for the source of Life.
So unto the world he again places
A call for a volunteer, only this
Time of human origin, of a man
Born not in a manger but in a house
Of the most true ideals that Man resolves
Himself to believe in.
And it is once again timely answered.
Except it is not Godâs Knight who answers,
But Godâs Bishop, Manâs shadow and shadows,
His concealed darkness, and his cursed side.
The Bishops of God do accept this call,
And take it upon themselves to redeem
God and humanity upon themselves.
The Bishops of God, manâs hidden shadow,
Prepare themselves to undertake this task,
Sanctifying themselves all to great lengths
To make themselves worthy of such glory.
Comment 1: https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/1270io9/memory_and_grief/
Comment 2: https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/1276kek/comment/jedd8i4/?context=3
submitted by OutspokenFox to OCPoetry [link] [comments]
God and His most cursed adversary!
Both fully conscious of eachâs presence
And aware of the plans of the other.
It is like an eternal chess battle
Between God and Satan that arose from
The origin of the abyssâs birth;
Whereupon God made light and birthed the Earth,
And with his first move created Adam
And from his rib Eve, where he foretold them
To exist in Paradise without end.
âââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
(Audio, on Youtube:) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpERoLmxNSU&t=3s
âââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
These two souls, most blissful and ignorant,
Are the twin sacred Knights, male and female,
Of the match of this masterful chess clash.
They are the Knights, most upright, tall and true
Who will guide us on past this journey through.
On this first move of God they rested, then
Crept about and roamed the Garden they dwelled,
Heeding Godâs command and staying true to
Their ordained path, blind ânânaĂŻve to their sight.
Yet Satan with his cunning and guile
On his first move resolved to take vengeance
Upon God for his wretched punishment.
And thus sent he his Queen, who is his wife
And daughter, who is also him, to sneak
Into the Garden and like a horrid
Serpent approach the Knights and deceive them,
With intent to lead them astray towards sin,
To fall from grace and from Paradise with
Intent to anger God for his divine
Punishment towards him and all of his kin.
The Queen of Satan says to the woman:
You will certainly not die for eating of the fruit!
But rather, like God and I,
Know good and evil!
The woman listened to the serpent in
The garden, and she handed the fruit to
Adam who was beside her then and now.
The Knights of God ate the forbidden fruit,
Gaining, indeed, such power as promised.
And upon this moment that it occurred
Lucifer smiled dearly, filled with joy
At Godâs Creationâs fall from high glory.
So was Satanâs move in this match of kings:
To lead astray mankind towards sin and death.
Yet now it is Godâs move,
And He is most displeased.
God is aware that Satan has led Man
Towards sin, and knows he intends to use this
To induce man to further its wages
And bring to Earth the wrath and flames of Hell
To exact most cruel revenge upon Him.
God is aware the man and the woman,
The two Knights He has bestowed His spirit,
Will be unable to resist against
The temptations of sin, and will plummet
To oblivion by Satanâs actions.
So He requests to His court a savior
To save a fallen and disgraced Mankind.
And His own Son nobly accepts His call.
In this match His Son represents the Queen
Of God, who He sends to sacrifice in
The place of mankind.
He sends His Queen, most powerful of all
Pieces, to sacrifice Herself for the
Two Knights that are mankind, who now in their
Arrogance dare to decide by themselves
What moves to perform without questioning
First God nor His almighty plan, and thus
In their folly led themselves to ruin.
Godâs Son dies for the sins of Man; The Queen
Of God sacrifices Herself to save
The chosen Knights of God from Satanâs wrath.
And Godâs Knights, man and woman, rest for now,
Saved from full woe by the tip of Godâs grace.
Yet now it is Satanâs move,
And he is most displeased.
Satan knows that God has sacrificed His
Son in an attempt to redeem mankind
For their sins.
He is still in possession, unlike God,
Of his Queen, His wife who is also his
Daughter who is also him.
He has used his own Knights to fortify
His every position, in contrast to
The bold and offensive moves of Godâs Knights,
Who because of their boldness are daring
In dispersing themselves in ways untold
To different parts of the alluring world.
So dispersed are they in their boldness that
They neglect to attend to their core in
Favor of busying themselves with more
Interesting and perplexing opinions,
Leaving the core of God and Godâs King who
Represents Him unattended to as
A result of His distance from His Men.
Satan is aware that God is thus most
Vulnerable, and that His core and His King
Are open to exploitation and woe.
He therefore sends his Queen to sneak into
The Castle of God, and to His most close
Angels whisper into their ear, to His
Rooks that were His Angels he said with such
Cleverness, and ever so cunningly
And reminiscent of that first tempting
of Eve, and Adam who stood beside her:
You can see very well how God treats you!
Look at how he has treated you thus far!
Look at your pieces! Your Knights who are Man
So bleak and lost, your Bishops who are Manâs
Shadows and Shadow so full of despair
And hopeless avarice, your Pawns who are
Nature and Her dominion so full of
Destruction and neuroticism, Look
At yourselves, O Rooks of Lord God, who are
Angels, So full of blind obedience
Crushed dreams, and wantonly stifled glory!
Does this not all concern you? Frighten
You? Anger you? Madden you? Bewilder
You? To see how God treats you? Ever so
Terribly and cruelly? Without regard
For the nature of being and meaning
As He rejects utterly the passions
Of every soul that lives and seeks power?
Does this not concern you so? For you can
See how God treats you! Look at how He has
Treated you thus far!
And the closest Angels of God listened
To the Queen of Satan and liked what she said.
So they agreed to help Satan stealth Godâs
Position, and thereupon destroy Him
Using the powers of knowledge of good
And evil possessed by Man in an act
Of final deception.
They cripple Godâs defenses and surround
His King with swift fury, daggering and
Wrathful at Him, full of threats towards His name.
Yet now it is Godâs turn to move.
God sees His defenses have been crippled
And that He is surrounded on all sides
By the work of His own dear Creation.
God is aware that Satan has turned Man
Against Him by telling Mankind of the
Nature of this world.
He is aware that His Sonâs sacrifice
No longer has any effect, since His
Sons and daughters no longer accept Him.
Knowing this He sits alone in Heaven
With all his infinite wisdom and plans.
He is aware that any attempts to
Save mankind with divine means will be of
No avail, since humanity will no
Longer accept divinity as the
Sole explanation for the source of Life.
So unto the world he again places
A call for a volunteer, only this
Time of human origin, of a man
Born not in a manger but in a house
Of the most true ideals that Man resolves
Himself to believe in.
And it is once again timely answered.
Except it is not Godâs Knight who answers,
But Godâs Bishop, Manâs shadow and shadows,
His concealed darkness, and his cursed side.
The Bishops of God do accept this call,
And take it upon themselves to redeem
God and humanity upon themselves.
The Bishops of God, manâs hidden shadow,
Prepare themselves to undertake this task,
Sanctifying themselves all to great lengths
To make themselves worthy of such glory.
Comment 1: https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/1270io9/memory_and_grief/
Comment 2: https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/1276kek/comment/jedd8i4/?context=3
2023.03.31 07:15 wsppan Today In Phishstory - March 31st
# Today In Phishstory - March 31st Brought to you by tiph-bot. Beep.
All data extracted via The Phishnet API.
Phish, Wednesday 03/31/1993 (30 years ago) Roseland Theater, Portland, OR, USA
Gap Chart, Tour: 1993 WinteSpring Tour
Set 1 : Runaway Jim , Foam , Sparkle , Split Open and Melt > Mound , Punch You in the Eye , Sample in a Jar , Reba , I Didn't Know 1 , David Bowie 2
Set 2 : Lengthwise 3 -> Maze , Bouncing Around the Room , Uncle Pen , Harry Hood 4 , Big Ball Jam , It's Ice , You Enjoy Myself , Harpua > She's So Cold 5 > Harpua , Chalk Dust Torture
Encore : AC/DC Bag , Sweet Adeline
1 Fish on washboard. 2 All Fall Down and Simpsons signals. 3 The segue from Lengthwise to Maze included an audience assist: the audience continued to sing the Lengthwise chorus after Fish finished, and the Maze high- hat intro completed the transition. 4 Simpsons signal. 5 Phish debut; incomplete.
Show Notes:
I Didn't Know featured Fish (introduced by Trey as "Madonna") on washboard. Bowie included All Fall Down and Simpsons signals; Hood later contained another Simpsons signal and Pink Panther theme and Odd Couple theme teases. The segue from Lengthwise to Maze included an audience assist: the audience continued to sing the Lengthwise chorus after Fish finished, and the Maze high- hat intro completed the transition. Harpua contained Buried Alive and Axel F teases. The Phish debut of She's So Cold was incomplete. At the end of Chalk Dust and again before AC/DC Bag, Trey made comments about Bonnie Raitt, who was also playing in town and whom he "has a big crush on." Sweet Adeline was dedicated to "Nina," who lost her ID and got it back from Trey on stage.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Phish, Tuesday 03/31/1992 (31 years ago) The Blue Note, Columbia, MO, USA
Gap Chart, Tour: 1992 Spring Tour
Set 1 : Wilson > Divided Sky , Glide , Split Open and Melt , Rift , Reba , Take the 'A' Train > Llama , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird > Run Like an Antelope
Set 2 : Mike's Song > I Am Hydrogen > Weekapaug Groove , Fee , Poor Heart , Stash , The Lizards , Cavern , Dinner and a Movie > My Friend, My Friend , My Sweet One 1 , Cold as Ice > Love You > Cold as Ice , Possum 2
Encore : Sweet Adeline 3
1 Started out much slower than normal; several subsequent tempo changes. 2 Aw Fuck!, Oom Pa Pa signals and two Simpsons signals. 3 Without microphones.
Jamchart Notes:
Stash - Unusually long version for this time period. Although largely straightforward, the jam features some great stacatto plucking by Trey and great tension building.
Show Notes:
Trey teased Buried Alive in Melt and Dixie briefly in 'A' Train. The Mockingbird narration contained an explanation of Gamehendge. My Sweet One started out much slower than normal, gradually speeding up with several subsequent tempo changes. Possum had Aw Fuck!, Oom Pa Pa signals and two Simpsons signals. Sweet Adeline was performed without microphones.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Phish, Sunday 03/31/1991 (32 years ago) Berkeley Square, Berkeley, CA, USA
Gap Chart, Tour: 1991 WinteSpring Tour
Set 1 : Buried Alive > Cavern , Runaway Jim , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird , The Landlady , My Sweet One , Esther > Possum 1 , I Didn't Know , Mike's Song > I Am Hydrogen > Weekapaug Groove
Set 2 : Harry Hood , The Sloth , The Squirming Coil , Stash , Uncle Pen , Guelah Papyrus , Bouncing Around the Room > Run Like an Antelope
Encore : Reba , Highway to Hell
1 Charlie Chan and Oom Pa Pa signals.
Show Notes:
Possum contained Charlie Chan and Oom Pa Pa signals. Mike teased Heartbreaker in Mike's Song. Hydrogen contained Woody Woodpecker theme teases from Trey. Weekapaug included Divided Sky and Dave's Energy Guide teases from Trey.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Phish, 1990-03-31 Der Rathskeller, Memorial Union, University of Wisconsin, Madison, WI, USA
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/phish-march-31-1990-der-rathskeller-memorial-union-university-of-wisconsin-madison-wi-usa.html
Tour: 1990 Tour
Show Notes:
Phish, Friday 03/31/1989 (34 years ago) The Front, Burlington, VT, USA
Gap Chart, Tour: 1989 Tour
Set 1 : Whipping Post
Show Notes:
No setlist exists but Kuroda recalls a long version of Whipping Post was performed at the show that he describes as his favorite Phish rendition of a cover song.This information is from Phish.com.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Phish, Thursday 03/31/1988 (35 years ago) Kenny's Castaways, New York, NY, USA
Gap Chart, Tour: 1988 Tour
Set 1 : I Didn't Know , Golgi Apparatus , Fee > AC/DC Bag > Possum , Fluffhead , Alumni Blues , The Lizards , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird , Take the 'A' Train , Fire , You Enjoy Myself , Wilson
Show Notes:
This was the first ever Phish show in New York City. AC/DC Bag was sung for Roger (presumably Roger Holloway), who was in attendance.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Vermont Jazz All-Stars, 1999-03-31 Tuttle Middle School Auditorium, South Burlington, VT, USA
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/trey-anastasio-march-31-1999-tuttle-middle-school-auditorium-south-burlington-vt-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: The Tuttle Middle School Jazz Band, led by Dave Grippo, performed their annual spring concert. Then Trey, along with the rest of the Vermont Jazz All-Stars joined Grippo for this set of jazz.
The Music of Paul Simon, 2014-03-31 Carnegie Hall, New York, NY, USA
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/mike-gordon-march-31-2014-carnegie-hall-new-york-ny-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: Twenty artists performed twenty Paul Simon classics to benefit youth-centered music education programs in New York City. Mike performed Late in the Evening on acoustic guitar and vocals, backed by Antibalas, who had served as the house band for the evening. Mike also joined the show's conclusion (The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy)) that featured all of the evening's performers, including Allen Toussaint, Angelique Kidjo, Ben Sollee, Bettye LaVette, Bob Mould, Brett Dennen, Ann Wilson, Isobel Campbell & Andy Cabic, Joe Henry, Josh Ritter, Joy Williams, Judy Collins, L.P., John Doe, Madeleine Peyroux & Jon Herington, Sam Moore, Bob Forrest & Gibby Haynes, and Richard Marx.
Pork Tornado, 2000-03-31 Theatre of the Living Arts, Philadelphia, PA, USA
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/jon-fishman-march-31-2000-theatre-of-the-living-arts-philadelphia-pa-usa.html
Tour: Fish - Pork Tornado Spring 2000
Show Notes:
Amfibian, 2001-03-31 Higher Ground, Winooski, VT, USA
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/guest-appearance-march-31-2001-higher-ground-winooski-vt-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: "Thesba" through "Driver" were performed by Trey on acoustic guitar and vocals and Tom Marshall on vocals; Stephen "Tebo" Thomas also added vocals on "Thesba." Tom, Trey, Matt Kohut, and Pete Cottone performed "Wading in the Velvet Sea"; this constituted first live performance by the band UTALK. All the members of Amfibian performed the encores, with Trey on electric guitar.
submitted by wsppan to phish [link] [comments]
All data extracted via The Phishnet API.
Phish
Gap Chart, Tour: 1993 WinteSpring Tour
Set 1 : Runaway Jim , Foam , Sparkle , Split Open and Melt > Mound , Punch You in the Eye , Sample in a Jar , Reba , I Didn't Know 1 , David Bowie 2
Set 2 : Lengthwise 3 -> Maze , Bouncing Around the Room , Uncle Pen , Harry Hood 4 , Big Ball Jam , It's Ice , You Enjoy Myself , Harpua > She's So Cold 5 > Harpua , Chalk Dust Torture
Encore : AC/DC Bag , Sweet Adeline
1 Fish on washboard. 2 All Fall Down and Simpsons signals. 3 The segue from Lengthwise to Maze included an audience assist: the audience continued to sing the Lengthwise chorus after Fish finished, and the Maze high- hat intro completed the transition. 4 Simpsons signal. 5 Phish debut; incomplete.
Show Notes:
I Didn't Know featured Fish (introduced by Trey as "Madonna") on washboard. Bowie included All Fall Down and Simpsons signals; Hood later contained another Simpsons signal and Pink Panther theme and Odd Couple theme teases. The segue from Lengthwise to Maze included an audience assist: the audience continued to sing the Lengthwise chorus after Fish finished, and the Maze high- hat intro completed the transition. Harpua contained Buried Alive and Axel F teases. The Phish debut of She's So Cold was incomplete. At the end of Chalk Dust and again before AC/DC Bag, Trey made comments about Bonnie Raitt, who was also playing in town and whom he "has a big crush on." Sweet Adeline was dedicated to "Nina," who lost her ID and got it back from Trey on stage.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Gap Chart, Tour: 1992 Spring Tour
Set 1 : Wilson > Divided Sky , Glide , Split Open and Melt , Rift , Reba , Take the 'A' Train > Llama , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird > Run Like an Antelope
Set 2 : Mike's Song > I Am Hydrogen > Weekapaug Groove , Fee , Poor Heart , Stash , The Lizards , Cavern , Dinner and a Movie > My Friend, My Friend , My Sweet One 1 , Cold as Ice > Love You > Cold as Ice , Possum 2
Encore : Sweet Adeline 3
1 Started out much slower than normal; several subsequent tempo changes. 2 Aw Fuck!, Oom Pa Pa signals and two Simpsons signals. 3 Without microphones.
Jamchart Notes:
Stash - Unusually long version for this time period. Although largely straightforward, the jam features some great stacatto plucking by Trey and great tension building.
Show Notes:
Trey teased Buried Alive in Melt and Dixie briefly in 'A' Train. The Mockingbird narration contained an explanation of Gamehendge. My Sweet One started out much slower than normal, gradually speeding up with several subsequent tempo changes. Possum had Aw Fuck!, Oom Pa Pa signals and two Simpsons signals. Sweet Adeline was performed without microphones.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Gap Chart, Tour: 1991 WinteSpring Tour
Set 1 : Buried Alive > Cavern , Runaway Jim , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird , The Landlady , My Sweet One , Esther > Possum 1 , I Didn't Know , Mike's Song > I Am Hydrogen > Weekapaug Groove
Set 2 : Harry Hood , The Sloth , The Squirming Coil , Stash , Uncle Pen , Guelah Papyrus , Bouncing Around the Room > Run Like an Antelope
Encore : Reba , Highway to Hell
1 Charlie Chan and Oom Pa Pa signals.
Show Notes:
Possum contained Charlie Chan and Oom Pa Pa signals. Mike teased Heartbreaker in Mike's Song. Hydrogen contained Woody Woodpecker theme teases from Trey. Weekapaug included Divided Sky and Dave's Energy Guide teases from Trey.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/phish-march-31-1990-der-rathskeller-memorial-union-university-of-wisconsin-madison-wi-usa.html
Tour: 1990 Tour
Show Notes:
Gap Chart, Tour: 1989 Tour
Set 1 : Whipping Post
Show Notes:
No setlist exists but Kuroda recalls a long version of Whipping Post was performed at the show that he describes as his favorite Phish rendition of a cover song.This information is from Phish.com.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Gap Chart, Tour: 1988 Tour
Set 1 : I Didn't Know , Golgi Apparatus , Fee > AC/DC Bag > Possum , Fluffhead , Alumni Blues , The Lizards , Colonel Forbin's Ascent > Fly Famous Mockingbird , Take the 'A' Train , Fire , You Enjoy Myself , Wilson
Show Notes:
This was the first ever Phish show in New York City. AC/DC Bag was sung for Roger (presumably Roger Holloway), who was in attendance.
Listen now at Phish.in!
Trey Anastasio
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/trey-anastasio-march-31-1999-tuttle-middle-school-auditorium-south-burlington-vt-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: The Tuttle Middle School Jazz Band, led by Dave Grippo, performed their annual spring concert. Then Trey, along with the rest of the Vermont Jazz All-Stars joined Grippo for this set of jazz.
Mike Gordon
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/mike-gordon-march-31-2014-carnegie-hall-new-york-ny-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: Twenty artists performed twenty Paul Simon classics to benefit youth-centered music education programs in New York City. Mike performed Late in the Evening on acoustic guitar and vocals, backed by Antibalas, who had served as the house band for the evening. Mike also joined the show's conclusion (The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy)) that featured all of the evening's performers, including Allen Toussaint, Angelique Kidjo, Ben Sollee, Bettye LaVette, Bob Mould, Brett Dennen, Ann Wilson, Isobel Campbell & Andy Cabic, Joe Henry, Josh Ritter, Joy Williams, Judy Collins, L.P., John Doe, Madeleine Peyroux & Jon Herington, Sam Moore, Bob Forrest & Gibby Haynes, and Richard Marx.
John Fishman
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/jon-fishman-march-31-2000-theatre-of-the-living-arts-philadelphia-pa-usa.html
Tour: Fish - Pork Tornado Spring 2000
Show Notes:
Other
Setlist: https://phish.net/setlists/guest-appearance-march-31-2001-higher-ground-winooski-vt-usa.html
Tour: Not Part of a Tour
Show Notes: "Thesba" through "Driver" were performed by Trey on acoustic guitar and vocals and Tom Marshall on vocals; Stephen "Tebo" Thomas also added vocals on "Thesba." Tom, Trey, Matt Kohut, and Pete Cottone performed "Wading in the Velvet Sea"; this constituted first live performance by the band UTALK. All the members of Amfibian performed the encores, with Trey on electric guitar.
2023.03.31 07:15 AnomalousEnigma Just coming to terms with this and itâs making me face the deepest causes of my self hatred. Any advice?
Iâm not going to bother with a formal diagnosis of dyscalculia (Iâve already potentially changed my mind a few minutes after initially writing this). because itâll be a lot of effort for little return. Iâm 20 and was diagnosed with ADHD last year at age 19. I was precocious with reading and writing. Iâve always been smart but always struggled with math. The numbers are just symbols. I conceptualize so well, then look at numbers and freeze. I mix numbers in my head and mix them when Iâm writing. Say the wrong number when Iâm thinking a different number. I was homeschooled for elementary school and math turned into screaming fights with my dad. Failed out of middle school math because I was getting the answers right but not doing it the way they wanted me to. In high school, I was in AP and advanced classes for everything, and then stuck in standard science and below standard non-college prep math. Told I made careless mistakes when I was trying my absolute hardest. When I was 9, I wanted to be a theoretical astrophysicist. I love science. I really wish I had the mind to be a neuroscientist now. The main facet of my identity and self worth has always come from people telling me Iâm smart, but then this struggle with math hits that narrative like a train. Iâve always said Iâll get better at math eventually, but itâs time to accept that this is who I am. This is me stopping in my tracks and finally turning to face my deepest insecurity. That I do have a learning disability. That I can never be the person I want to be.
I am beyond cruel to myself. I would never see another person as less for having dyscalculia, but it makes me see myself like a moldy smoothie mug that got left in a hot car. I realize I have to let the ugliest, most judgmental part of myself come out to come to terms with this. What has helped you guys love yourselves in the face of this? Has anyone else here had to stop running and face it later in life like I am? Had it build as a festering and massive insecurity for twenty years? Do you think I can ever get out of this self hatred?
submitted by AnomalousEnigma to dyscalculia [link] [comments]
I am beyond cruel to myself. I would never see another person as less for having dyscalculia, but it makes me see myself like a moldy smoothie mug that got left in a hot car. I realize I have to let the ugliest, most judgmental part of myself come out to come to terms with this. What has helped you guys love yourselves in the face of this? Has anyone else here had to stop running and face it later in life like I am? Had it build as a festering and massive insecurity for twenty years? Do you think I can ever get out of this self hatred?
2023.03.31 07:13 emotionalastronomer0 The past truly affects the future
Hello everyone , I am a young adult who has bpd and complex ptsd. I live everyday as just a character in peoples lives , im aware of my destiny. I know I will be alone and die alone , and I know we all die alone but I will truly be alone. Iâve been betrayed by all the people Iâve loved. Family, parents , friends , and lover. And when I say lover I do mean just one person. I dated a girl for 4 years , we were high school sweethearts. When I came to college we both miserably failed in handling long distance. Eventually she cheated on my with a boy best friend. Iâve been through so much , and on the day it happened. It triggered something in me , it brought me back to every sad and heartbreaking moment in my life. The little me who only needed love and just wanted to be noticed was only put through awful pain. And unfortunately I did have one good friend in middle school , he made me feel noticed and glad to be in school. Unfortunately he died in a fire and was back to be alone. I only wish to know how different my life wouldâve been if he was still here. It sucks that now in college I canât make friends because I donât know how to talk to people and I do put in the effort but always end up just an outcast. A plus one in any friend group. Even though Iâve suffered almost everything a human can suffer , I still strive to be a good person and be kind. Everyday I fight this hatred that I have and make sure it doesnât come out. I fear that person , but I canât live like this. The life of being humans doesnât fit me. This isnât a cry for help , just want to vent for if my day ever comes part of my story was heard by someone out there. Please stop the hate , people donât live for that long donât waste your time with insignificant things. Live , love, and laugh please.
submitted by emotionalastronomer0 to Vent [link] [comments]
2023.03.31 07:12 ThrowRA_mountain47 My (22M) fiancé (21F) is upset I get uncomfortable and feel anxiety when she spends time around other men
I feel I need to explain everything leading up to this to properly convey why I feel the way I feel so please bare with me.
Context: My fiancĂ© and I have been together over 3 years now. Sheâs the love of my life and I would do practically anything for her. Iâm in the military so the majority of our relationship has been long distance but I still visit a minimum of once a month or every two weeks if I can. Lately sheâs been having a lot of problems with herself and our relationship. She takes issue with physical intimacy and sex, usually either denying me or seeming reluctant to make love, when that was never the case for our first 2 years together and we practically pounced on each other at every given opportunity.
She also explained problems being emotive or expressive on the phone and text, again this never being a problem in the past. So over the last year or so sheâs slowly started avoiding physical intimacy, and seeming numb and callous both on the phone and in person. (I should note Iâm currently deployed over seas and have been for a few months now). Finally, some weeks ago we called and had a long talk about these new behaviors she developed, ending with her explaining that she doesnât think weâre compatible and that I donât have the ânon- negotiable traitsâ she would look for in a man (I.e. politics, views on social and family issues, etc) and considered breaking up. It crushed me.
Iâm far from a perfect bf but Iâve always tried my hardest to be the best man I could for her. Iâve never been physically or emotionally abusive. I spend hundreds of dollars a month to go see her, taking her out for dinner, buying her whatever she wants. I always take time out of my day to listen and talk to her. Whenever she takes issue with something about me, like my tendency to make insensitive jokes, I always try to change myself to be better for her. I try to be patient and understand everything thatâs going on with her. Not a day goes by where I donât think of her and tell her I love her. Then she came out of the blue saying all these things about how weâre not compatible and how she thinks she wants to break up. It left me devastated.
I all but begged her stay, and fortunately she did. But thereâs been tension ever since that day and anxiety has been crippling my ability to function normally. Ever since Iâve felt as if I make a mistake that a break up is waiting to crash down on me. Iâve never felt this insecure or unloved or anxious in my life.
Now for the main issue, sorry about all that lead up.â- My fiancĂ© has had male friends for the better part of a year now. They started out on discord as online friends just playing games together and such. I didnât pay it much mind at the time. The group of friends has more men than girls in it. Itâs essentially a few guys and one female friend my fiancĂ© has known for a long time.
Iâve known for some time that some of the men in the group frequently try to invite my fiancĂ© out (coffee or movies and such), as several of them happen to be local. Again, I tried not to let it bother me much and she expressed to me I have nothing to worry about several times and that I should trust her. Before I deployed I asked her very politely if she could refrain from meeting up in person with these other men while I was gone and she freaked the fuck out. She cried, she begged, she accused me of not trusting her, you get the idea. I gave in.
I tried to set down some ground rules like no drinking, no getting picked up from home by these other men, not spending time at their homes, not smoking weed or partying with these other men. I felt I was being reasonable. Again, she freaked out. She accused me of being untrusting, unhealthy in my thinking, asked why I canât just trust her, cried and wouldnât budge on anything. So again, I gave in.
Fast forward to very recently. Sheâs spending time with these other men and leaving me in the dark for 2-3 hours at a time while she does. We normally text each other all day. In this last occasion she was in another manâs home attending what was basically a small party with the friend group, late into the night. The entire period of 2+ hours when she wouldnât text me back I was wallowing in anxiety and insecurity, something I know she knew. When she was done for the night I respectfully asked if she could text or update me more frequently while she was spending time with her friends. She got very defensive and refused.
She explained that she just lost track of time and I shouldnât worry, that I was micro managing her, that she didnât want to look at her phone while she was with friends. To clarify, I originally asked if she could send an update text every 30 minutes or so. That was all. She fought me on it aggressively. I tried my best to explain that it was just for my own comfort and feeling of security. She wouldnât give in even a little, so I did.
Now weâre here, with me feeling like shit and insecure as hell, losing all the pride I had in my relationship. Iâm fully aware much of this is being lead on by own feelings of insecurity and jealousy, but how could I not feel these things after what she said to me only a few weeks ago? Especially when Iâm deployed overseas and Iâve never had the chance to meet these men before?
I donât think sheâs cheating. Or at least I hope not. I literally just want her to provide any kind of security or comfort while she spends time with other men. But she wonât. And I have no clue what to do about it. Help me.
TLDR: My fiancé recently said some things to me that made me feel not good enough for her and insecure in our relationship. Lately she's been spending time with other men (and one girl) as part of a friend group like at another man's house. She will go ghost on me for 2-3 hours at a time when she does so and when I asked her to text me more often while she's out with these other men she got very defensive and said I'm micro managing and thinking in a mentally unhealthy way. I don't know where to go from here.
submitted by ThrowRA_mountain47 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
Context: My fiancĂ© and I have been together over 3 years now. Sheâs the love of my life and I would do practically anything for her. Iâm in the military so the majority of our relationship has been long distance but I still visit a minimum of once a month or every two weeks if I can. Lately sheâs been having a lot of problems with herself and our relationship. She takes issue with physical intimacy and sex, usually either denying me or seeming reluctant to make love, when that was never the case for our first 2 years together and we practically pounced on each other at every given opportunity.
She also explained problems being emotive or expressive on the phone and text, again this never being a problem in the past. So over the last year or so sheâs slowly started avoiding physical intimacy, and seeming numb and callous both on the phone and in person. (I should note Iâm currently deployed over seas and have been for a few months now). Finally, some weeks ago we called and had a long talk about these new behaviors she developed, ending with her explaining that she doesnât think weâre compatible and that I donât have the ânon- negotiable traitsâ she would look for in a man (I.e. politics, views on social and family issues, etc) and considered breaking up. It crushed me.
Iâm far from a perfect bf but Iâve always tried my hardest to be the best man I could for her. Iâve never been physically or emotionally abusive. I spend hundreds of dollars a month to go see her, taking her out for dinner, buying her whatever she wants. I always take time out of my day to listen and talk to her. Whenever she takes issue with something about me, like my tendency to make insensitive jokes, I always try to change myself to be better for her. I try to be patient and understand everything thatâs going on with her. Not a day goes by where I donât think of her and tell her I love her. Then she came out of the blue saying all these things about how weâre not compatible and how she thinks she wants to break up. It left me devastated.
I all but begged her stay, and fortunately she did. But thereâs been tension ever since that day and anxiety has been crippling my ability to function normally. Ever since Iâve felt as if I make a mistake that a break up is waiting to crash down on me. Iâve never felt this insecure or unloved or anxious in my life.
Now for the main issue, sorry about all that lead up.â- My fiancĂ© has had male friends for the better part of a year now. They started out on discord as online friends just playing games together and such. I didnât pay it much mind at the time. The group of friends has more men than girls in it. Itâs essentially a few guys and one female friend my fiancĂ© has known for a long time.
Iâve known for some time that some of the men in the group frequently try to invite my fiancĂ© out (coffee or movies and such), as several of them happen to be local. Again, I tried not to let it bother me much and she expressed to me I have nothing to worry about several times and that I should trust her. Before I deployed I asked her very politely if she could refrain from meeting up in person with these other men while I was gone and she freaked the fuck out. She cried, she begged, she accused me of not trusting her, you get the idea. I gave in.
I tried to set down some ground rules like no drinking, no getting picked up from home by these other men, not spending time at their homes, not smoking weed or partying with these other men. I felt I was being reasonable. Again, she freaked out. She accused me of being untrusting, unhealthy in my thinking, asked why I canât just trust her, cried and wouldnât budge on anything. So again, I gave in.
Fast forward to very recently. Sheâs spending time with these other men and leaving me in the dark for 2-3 hours at a time while she does. We normally text each other all day. In this last occasion she was in another manâs home attending what was basically a small party with the friend group, late into the night. The entire period of 2+ hours when she wouldnât text me back I was wallowing in anxiety and insecurity, something I know she knew. When she was done for the night I respectfully asked if she could text or update me more frequently while she was spending time with her friends. She got very defensive and refused.
She explained that she just lost track of time and I shouldnât worry, that I was micro managing her, that she didnât want to look at her phone while she was with friends. To clarify, I originally asked if she could send an update text every 30 minutes or so. That was all. She fought me on it aggressively. I tried my best to explain that it was just for my own comfort and feeling of security. She wouldnât give in even a little, so I did.
Now weâre here, with me feeling like shit and insecure as hell, losing all the pride I had in my relationship. Iâm fully aware much of this is being lead on by own feelings of insecurity and jealousy, but how could I not feel these things after what she said to me only a few weeks ago? Especially when Iâm deployed overseas and Iâve never had the chance to meet these men before?
I donât think sheâs cheating. Or at least I hope not. I literally just want her to provide any kind of security or comfort while she spends time with other men. But she wonât. And I have no clue what to do about it. Help me.
TLDR: My fiancé recently said some things to me that made me feel not good enough for her and insecure in our relationship. Lately she's been spending time with other men (and one girl) as part of a friend group like at another man's house. She will go ghost on me for 2-3 hours at a time when she does so and when I asked her to text me more often while she's out with these other men she got very defensive and said I'm micro managing and thinking in a mentally unhealthy way. I don't know where to go from here.