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So, im really private about my life and I usually dont come on here but i need to air out my anger. It starts Monday (June 5th, 2023) They just built a Chipotle in my area and it's new to everyone. I started my first (May 29th). I was happy to even be a worker. Not once did I slack while i was on the job. On my third day, one of the supervisors complimented my work and i was confident. On Monday, it went down hill. First thing I noticed is the GM didn't put me on the schedule. She claimed she was having family issues so she didn't make the schedule. She just texted on my phone saying "Come in at 10 am"- keep in mind I haven't been late, like ever. I was doing fine until about 3-4 pm. The supervisor walks up to me and says i left the lobby "a mess and if i wanted to be put back on the schedule then i need to do better"- I did not argue with the supervisor but the area was in fact clean. I asked one of my co workers if it looks bad and she tells me no. Plus this supervisor had a problem with me sitting down and wiping tables -red flag-. She ends up telling the GM. The GM never said anything to me. A few days go by and it's Thursday, still no schedule. I also noticed the manager blocked my number-red flag-, so i had to call the store. She tells me to come on Thursday morning and let's have a chat. She basically said she wanted to train me to other stuff but i had to prove to her that i can do it, also told me to stop sitting down. She also said come in Saturday (today), and Sunday. I come in and clock in. Immediately i get started on cleaning. I made sure all teas and specialty teas were fine. I waited for people to get up from tables and cleaned it off, i kept everything stocked. I watched over bathrooms to make sure, and i double checked. This was 3:30 pm. I went to the bathroom. While i was in the bathroom, I noticed i got a text from my boyfriend. He sent a picture of me working and said he dropped the car off (He works near my now old workplace). There was a long line of customers so i went through the side doors. Not to mention, i had a rag and purell still in my hands. I walked to the patio and I noticed a table was dirty. I leaned over and wiped it down. My boyfriend handed me the keys to the car and walked off to this work place. I walked in and started wiping a few more tables. I started to head to the back because I remember Berry tractor tea is low. The same supervisors walks up to me and goes "Hey, we need to talk".. I thought she was gonna tell me, im doing better today. She tells me i was fired because i was sitting down and "3" people had reported me slacking off. I was calm about it, and i said those 3 people are lying. They keep this whole camera footage in their office. I asked if they could run the footage back to prove I wasn't slacking. She told me no and asked me to clock out. The general manager in training was sitting there the whole time. I asked her did she see me sit down. She looked confused but looks at the supervisor who was trying to fire me. Then she blantly lied and said i did. I asked her to replay the footage and they refused. She told me to contact general manager but I know the GM is going to believe her because she believed her the first time. I walked out and asked the kitchen who saw me sit down? Most of them said no, and the manager told them to keep their mouth shut. Now im genuinely starting to think they wanted to fire me from the jump. Was i wrongfully terminated? Or was it reasonable?
Hello everyone. I (29M) am auditing the trauma-laden relationship with my DID wife (29F) after another bout of unwanted cheating. We are hypermonogamists. To us, infidelity is a sacrilegious violation of Love. Alas, my wife has Dissociative Identity Disorder and some alters are hellbent on reenacting trauma with abuser substitutes. Yes, the DID is diagnosed by a trauma specialist, not Dr. Google. To differentiate from her alters, I will refer to Her True Self as Wifey.
I tracked the cheating history by writing this behemoth of a post and did my best to connect dots between childhood trauma and modern consequences. I hope that the community’s outside perspectives can spot things to which we are still blind, provide advice, or give any input that might aid our situation. All opinions welcome. I will access them carefully.
Please note that I have a Dismissive-Avoidant attachment style, and my psychologist noted C-PTSD. I also have DID but unlike my wife, I worked long enough to achieve co-consciousness, internal cooperation, and current dormancy in my alters. My True Self is finally in command. We ran out of therapy money before my wife could address her own issues, hence online communities are our last resort until savings build up again. OUR TRAUMATIC CHILDHOOD ORIGINS
I was raised and abused by my narcissist grandmother for 25 years due to her orchestrating a rift between Mom and I (topic for another post). Her 16yo son aka my uncle sexually abused both my wife and I from infancy. In my case he had daily access. For my wife, it was because our fathers and my uncle were a trio of scum.
Despite the uncle link, I didn’t meet Wifey till age 3. She was dancing under a sprinkler and noticed my stare. Lightning hit us the second our eyes met and we breathlessly ran over to announce the mutual BOOM. After that, we were inseparable. At age 4 I proposed, she agreed, and we shared our first kiss. Adorable? No. We didn’t know how to be kids—due to sex abuse and grandma teaching us adult concepts, we related as boyfriend-girlfriend way too early and began playing the game ‘naked stuff’. Nothing beyond this first connection is purely innocent.
Soon after our romantic friendship started, my wife was groomed into nightly ‘special love’ with my uncle, laying a foundation of unfaithfulness towards me. When the ‘other boyfriend’ dumped her at 6, infatuation spiked and led to 9 years of cartwheels to regain his desire. Between that and my grandmother worshipping him, I competed for both women’s hearts by copying uncle into synonymity. I even used his playlists for dates and sex, believing that I am only worthy of love if I *am* him.
During and after my uncle’s abuse, my wife’s pedo father raped her too. I am loathed to call this BDSM given that he never abided by Safe, Sane, Consensual, but what he inflicted *is* BDSM activity. By age 5, he was trafficking his daughter and forced me to watch the rapes plus participate in sadism until I started doing it of my own accord. I was taught that boys are supposed to do this to girls, because they are girls. I didn’t know vanilla sex exists till age 11, at which point we finally shared positive intimacy—this formed the bedrock of what we are striving to build in adulthood. Alas, the learned fetishes persisted for years.
Meanwhile, my narcissist grandmother tormented me daily and brainwashed my wife to mimic her opinions, mannerisms, approaches, etc., thereby producing a mini-me alter and adding layers to our trauma bond. That alter learned toxic views on women (they exist to serve men) and pro-adultery, as the Narc preyed on committed guys for the fun of causing break-ups, obtained her husband by homewrecking, and caught a married lover long before grandpa died. As teens we were actually ghostwriters and phone sex assistants for that affair, obstructing critical stages in our own relationship.
Throughout this, Love existed. No one but her made me feel Loved, Seen, Heard, Safe, Certain. Moreover, me and Wifey expressed authentically only to each other, providing an oasis for Our True Selves to develop untarnished. We mutually soothed our demons, inspired creativity, and entertained one another. Teen Wifey also proved my angel. She endured hell to guide me out of darkness and prevented suicide attempts. Without her, I would be in prison or dead. At 23 we married in hopes of becoming wholesome and slowly inched toward that goal.
For Wifey’s wellbeing, I spent 2015-2022 deprogramming my BDSM porn addiction, fetishes, and toxic attitudes about women. Only last year I comprehended healthy relationships in concept. I think it is a beautiful way to live but it unnerves me as well. We also realized that vanilla D/s is our true preference, and we are highly compatible as a team. There is potential for absolute Paradise, but many issues still need to be overcome (communication struggles, ignoring Wifey for eons while she waits for me to interact again, etc.). The infidelity is my current focus. Here goes the trauma-fuelled history of online cheating. AN UNCLE SUBSTITUTE EXPLOITS HER
Wifey has 7 alters. Some self-harm, some climb out windows, some rabidly scratch me or shriek enough for police to arrive, but the most annoying is that 9yo girl imprinted on my uncle. She always pines to get him back—which she finally did, in proxy form: AP1 (Affair Partner 1).
May 19th, 2022, my wife met a 31yo ‘virgin’ on Facebook who sucked her in via sob stories. While extracting info on her alters and rapes, AP1 made her a sex-ed teacher. Her confidence flourished. I had no concerns given my rock-solid trust in Wifey. Little did I know the 9yo alter was having an emotional affair of unrequited ‘love’. AP1’s eerie similitude in looks / job / zodiac / vibe / pedo streak made him an ideal projection, especially given how much Uncle 2.0 lavished the alter. He was her dream come true. Looking back, I invited this situation by depriving Wifey of attention for too long. She needs regular interaction with me to stay Her True Self.
Anyways, Wifey believed the hours spent texting / on the phone were recharging her desire for ‘me’. We were yet to understand that ‘me’ meant ‘uncle’, as the two were blended. I started feeling off, but kept trusting her. After all, she had befriended two FB guys in 2021 who stayed platonic (only now we recognize them as lighter emotional affairs). Besides, grandma taught me that getting randomly sidelined or devalued is ‘just the way things are’.
After 3 weeks of grooming, AP1 triggered my wife, fully infiltrating her subconscious. She fearfully hid from him for 2 days, then tried to end the friendship on June 8th. AP1 derailed the goodbye into engaging topics, followed by traumatic content that methodically wore her down into an aroused trance. Once he hit the trigger jackpot, her alter seized control and delved into 6 hours of abuse reenactment sexting, audio clips, nudes, unholy “I love yous”, etc. while Wifey’s undercurrent of extreme stress induced miniature heart attacks—this caused permanent damage. Once Wifey woke up and saw what transpired, a female FB friend moved mountains to prevent her guilt-ridden suicide. She desperately wanted to die.
Later, I walked into the room expecting nothing unusual. Instead, tear-stricken wife fell to her knees, grabbed my leg and frantically confessed sexting, giving away our gif collection and using terms sacred to us. The heartbreak annihilated me. While consoling her, I struggled to swallow reality: the ONE PERSON I thought would never break my trust, just shattered it. Another dude just *stole MY wife*. Long before I learned that my old rival (uncle) was the motive, I felt triggered.
Many talks / meltdowns ensued between us and Mom. 48 hours later, the alter cheated again (June 10th) while we thought Wifey was snoozing. AP1 had unlocked an oil spill of traumatic arousal, hence it took seconds to induce the marathon, this time centred on BDSM. AP1 then instructed the alter to give him first dibs every day—the Husband can only get sloppy seconds. Once he left, she ran over to Mom announcing that her boyfriend is going to marry her (old fantasy about my uncle) in a jarringly American voice (Wifey is Francophone). This unmasked DID as the cheating engine and introduced us to a previously-unknown alter.
Once awake, Wifey plunged into catatonic shock and depression. We all supported Wifey grieving AP1’s sick exploitation and processing why she succumbed. I never got a chance to focus on myself amid the revolutionary insights, plus Mom and I kept scrambling to stop that alter before she obeyed the “sext me daily” command that would only retraumatize her further. We also discovered AP1 is a predator who targets mentally-ill wives in addition to little girls. That vulture has a thing for the most vulnerable forbidden fruit.
Realizing the insidious influence made Wifey hyperfocus on Our Marriage. She was outraged that AP1 dared invade us and texted him revocations of love, condemnations for “raping her while drunk” and tried to hammer the sanctity of Marriage into his snide mug. We banded together against my uncle’s spectre and felt in-tune as a couple. Therapy sessions were scheduled. Had this continued, Our Love would be detoxed and stronger than ever. Alas, a parasitic distraction sapped its power 6 days later. GRANDMOTHER TRAUMA BOND INTERFERES
My wife kept shutting down during intimacy due to intrusive memories of AP1, plus an urge to blot out the existence of non-abusive sex. Her alters were clinging to my uncle’s ‘style’. She quickly realized that AP1 had stained sex and rendered her numb to me. She was distraught.
When my wife sought advice on June 16th, 2022, her friend (also abused) nabbed the chance to confess a bewildering lesbian crush. This shock activated the trauma bond with my grandmother and prompted another alter affair. She declared that a bit of lesbianism will cure our intimacy problem. At first, I laughed it off. Then therapy was cancelled, my savings were spent on gifts, and I realized that my wife’s #heart# was stolen in addition to sex drive. A Facebook woman had burglarized my one remaining stronghold.
Given how romantic it was, I felt replaced, invisible, abandoned (childhood themes). It sliced and diced me, particularly since my wife blinded herself to my pain no matter how I pushed her to see it (grandmother theme). My wife cried that she wants us both and can’t choose—no wonder, since she was unknowingly reliving a childhood scenario where emotional incest with my grandmother accompanied and influenced Our Love.
I was clueless about this. To me, it seemed a heart-crushing romantic affair. Being a hypermonogamist forced into polyamory is indescribable. On June 23rd, I ranted at AP2 for stealing the Love of My Life and decided on suicide even if I’m hellbound—Heaven means nothing sans my wife. Panicked AP2 called the cops. Mom convinced the officers that it was a false alarm, knowing that I would try to get shot. Wifey was unrecognizably hollow while comforting me. I fell asleep in bitter tears, her hand numbly wiping them away.
My bitterness began erupting while teary wife insisted this is a mission. She swore to end the affair as soon as she solves the ‘mysteries of sudden lesbianism’. I refused to support it. Our fights incited a fullblown manifestation of my AFib and worsened heart issues for my wife. Daily vomiting turned her into skin-and-bones. We nearly died, which would have caused the suicide of My Mom and AP2. Poor Mom already suffered intense health issues from this affair. She adores us both. Our vitriol devastated her.
Eventually I put my wife’s happiness above my own and let her go: if she is meant to come back to me, she will. I spent another month in living death. Surprisingly, Wife kept her promise. She discovered that the emotional incest with mother figures in both her and AP2 caused them to ‘fall in love’. The alters tied to my grandmother lost their grip, the affair ended (August 13th), and Love for me flooded back.
Wifey returned a matured woman: more Self-Aware, rational, and opposed to adultery than ever. I fell in Love with her vibrancy. Meanwhile, AP2 became our mutual best friend, an invaluable source of epiphanies for my healing too, and the biggest supporter of Our Love. Turns out that we all share near-identical trauma plus share common interests. As a result, I felt gratitude for this affair. Short-term suffering reaped long-term blessings. A STRAINED AFTERMATH
AP1 continued to highjack our sex life. The conscious resurrection of my uncle in my wife’s psyche permanently split him and I into two men and revealed the sexual imprint. Between bringing that into her awareness and the various desecrations, AP1 vandalized her. Damn the timing! We were on the verge of a sex life free from trauma!
We lived in tension despite Loving efforts, and I struggled to overcome the sense that my mate is tainted. I put the bedroom on hold until these stains were purified, and figured it was best not to impose myself until the alter stops craving Uncle 2.0. For months I patrolled my turf obsessively while screaming inside. Did my best to remember that Wifey never betrayed me—these are only echoes of the past wrecking havoc in modern day. TRANSCENDING THE CHEATING
Fast forward a year since the two affairs. I was working on Self-development and finally grieving my grandmother trauma. My wife started reflecting deeper on infidelity and had epiphanies:
- Everything that she finds attractive and attributed to my uncle belongs to me (e.g., *I’m* the analytical nerdy poet surrounded by books—he’s the robotic, stuffy tech fanatic).
- I am her real dreamboat, projected onto the pedo worshipped by her idol (my grandmother) instead of vice versa. She actually Loves me MORE as I gain authenticity.
AP1 displacing me as the substitute proved a vital liberation. My wife gained clarity because he took the entire uncle projection onto himself. That also made me shed residual mimicry. Her sex alters went dormant and True Wife was eager to rediscover Her Husband directly.
During Our Anniversary (mid-April), True Wife was a trembling ball of remorse and begged for an impromptu vow renewal. Her turn was a meltdown of apologies and fervent promises to never forsake Our Love again. She convinced me of her redemption, especially after rejecting FB dudes in her inbox while posting wishes to me. Hope was rebuilt. We seemed en route to healing. One problem: we still didn’t have sex. ABUSER CONDITIONING RETALIATES
Avoiding sex since the cheatings was incredibly stupid. I didn’t realize that her alters, though dormant, felt owned by my uncle because I never reclaimed her. AP1 factory-reset my wife’s sexuality. The healthy things needed reinstallation before it was safe for her to face old trauma. My failure to do that made alters restless and our reconciliation was seen as a challenge to her fortified abuse programming. This was the worst time for my wife to post in a rape support sub.
In minutes the DM creeps descended and my wife met a pedophile whose way of abusing little girls woke the alters. My wife was in denial about the risk and texted me: “The affairs revealed truth about my alters and abuse. This man too. I gain awareness about my trauma as I tell it to him and understand more why pedophiles hurt us. I shall make sure it does not get personal. It is not a real affair. I am just researching.”
My heart was pounding but I tried to trust that she will stay within (barely tolerable) boundaries. NOPE. A mere 38 days after vowing never to betray me, her alter pleaded the pedophile to describe what *he* would do to 6-year old *her*. He whet her appetite with a partially-fulfilling fantasy before ghosting. Wifey entered a bizarre state of autopilot.
Inexplicably, she contacted a BDSM Redditor who is a known sanity risk, solicited him for sexting, then prayed for him not to respond. When he did, she felt scared shitless and obligated to describe her old tortures (as he commanded). The guy proceeded to demolish my wife’s barriers until she started craving her father’s tortures. The moment she called him “Master”, it was over for me.
I shut down and observed the trainwreck, feeling no sympathy. My wife invited all this shit and made a conscious choice to engage instead of block. I was dejectedly amused listening to the circus: “This is just research, I learn my mind by interacting with bad men—OMG OMG I DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN SURVIVE THIS FILTH! I WANT ONLY YOU! Oh, another client needs my trauma for pleasure! Got to go!”
I felt too drained to realize that her unhinged sexting spree was stirring my trauma. Another oversight. THE RIDE THROUGH OLD HELL
From May 27-28th, her alter became a snowball down Mt. Everest and the avalanche pulled me under. DM perverts verbally raped my wife while she took explicit photos right next to me in bed. Against all expectation, these e-rapes catapulted me back to boyhood: helpless to intervene, and too horrified to close my eyes. Taking away the phone didn’t cross my mind, nor could I. My body was paralyzed and eerily, I lost the ability to make sound. Seems that I contain significantly more trauma programming than anticipated. I resent my wife for subjecting me to this oppressive hell even more than I resent the cheating itself.
As if going down ‘memory lane’ wasn’t enough, possessed wife also channelled my grandmother. She would look at my tears and emit her sadistic CACKLE. Once I merged the two women, I was screwed. My trauma program dictates that I must endure whatever grandma wants; this includes watching her affair unfold.
As the ultimate insult, my wife spent the last 12 hours building an emotional affair on Reddit while I prayed for sleep. By dawn, her alter declared him a potential ‘boyfriend’. In her deluded head, the sexting arranged for nightfall would cure the rest through ultimate satisfaction plus bring True Wife back to Our Love, as this guy made her feel that “I am with you, not your uncle. Like *you* finally feel real.” The nonsensicality made me short-circuit. I was DONE. INSANITY SLAMS TO A HALT
That afternoon, she finally jolted out of the binge-sexting. How? Wifey noticed my distress, 5 days too late. I watched her first comprehend that this is hurting me, then struggle to reset consciousness, then remember that Love exists. She did a 180 on her ‘client’ and viciously berated his perversion. That helped her regain footing.
My jittery wife proceeded to apologize, freak about the explicit photos, and spiral into a suicidal state over betraying me again. She erratically cancelled every sexting appointment, shut off the DMs, and spent days begging Divinity for help. We avoided each other.
In our first talk, Wifey confessed that she fears herself, as only her housebound life prevents physical cheating. While she wants nothing more than to be pure, her alters are begging for more due to trauma bonds. Wifey described it as: “Insatiable rocket blocked by a moral fence and waiting for release to zoom again.” Needless to say I was embittered. REFLECTING ON THE AFTERMATH
While analyzing recent events, I realized something: my wife didn’t run to that BDSM sadist of her own volition. An elusive alter had taken the wheel: the brothel Madame who pulls my wife into prostitution re-enactments. No wonder she was cackling! It’s the alter’s trademark, based on my grandmother! That damn Narc used to say that it’s bad to deprive other men and let the body go to waste on one Husband. *No wonder* a vow renewal pissed off that alter! Now Wifey-on-autopilot made sense.
Wifey was stunned at the revelation and had a glitch (outraged cackles, whimpers, shudders) that confirmed its truth. She never knew this freaky alter steers her from behind the scenes. Took her awhile to digest the disturbing paradigm shift.
Interestingly, she later texted: “That alter does not excuse my choice to chat with a pedophile right after another creep showed me how vulnerable I am. I have ultimate responsibility even if later choices were not mine.”
I asked if that choice was really her own. She replied: “I think so, because he introduced himself as a retired counsellor. I never expected he was a pedophile and when he mentioned it, I should have been proactive about risks continuing such a topic with any man.”
I avoided her again and tried to pinpoint my feelings (still a struggle). No matter how blatantly I see the nymphomaniac is not Her True Self, the serial breakage of trust is making me relinquish hope, care, and concern. The more I sink into numbness, the less I care who is culpable. The whole Wifey & Co. feel ruined. I know it is very unfair to shun Wifey for sins committed in a trauma trance. DID is involuntary. Yet, her issues are a jinx now that I am surpassing our old life. The very toxicities Wifey healed in me remain her alters’ addiction. Now they’re in nasty withdrawal, desperate for any ‘drug’.
For the first time ever, divorce is drifting through my thoughts. I keep wondering, do I treat these events as a growth opportunity for her, or grounds for divorce? I want to reconcile, but should I? I’m burned out. She’s constant trouble. I feel ready to bail. And honestly, I feel unsafe.
Like my grandmother, my wife let me fly again before shooting me down. I barely began grieving narcissistic abuses and am scared of her containing grandma energy. The no-contact I implemented seems pointless—that Narc lives in my wife anyways. She even has the same power to crush me to dust, only stronger. My wife is my biggest weakness. I abhor weakness, thus I am abhorring her. I also detest the oppression of tiptoeing, compromising, and obliging alter whims at the expense of serious plans—JUST LIKE WITH MY GRANDMOTHER.
Then again, I can’t fathom living after a divorce. Wifey loves Celine Dion and we are the epitome of that duet I Hate You Then I Love You. The lyrics “It’s impossible to live *with you*, but I could never live *without you*, for whatever you do, I never never never want to be in Love with anyone but *you*” still rings true.
The Spouse Slot in my heart was formed in my wife’s shape and for her Essence alone. I can’t accept any other. If I was the dead guy in What Dreams May Come (one of our favourite films), I would definitely traverse the afterlife to save my wife no matter how broken she is. Existence in any world is meaningless without her.
We overcame worse hells than cheating. Why would I abandon Wifey when she is in desperate need of protection!? We live by the quote: “A perfect marriage is two imperfect people refusing to give up on each other.” In my belief, we are Twin Flames, and Wifey is definitely my Ideal Woman: demure, dreamy, melancholic, full of mischief and poetry. She saved my life. She redeemed me. We are supposed to grow old and go to Eternity together. Why would I give up on a lifelong mate over trauma!?
It seems that I am losing interest. This necrosis spurs the desire to amputate, while the increasing loss of exclusivity is repellent. For years I unquestioningly believed that she’s *incapable* of desiring anyone but me. Now my ownership feels diluted, invalidated, defeated. Several guy’s marks are all over her and nothing scrubs them off. Her intrusive memories of affairs even obstruct our intimacy!!!!! It is slammed into my face constantly—she is no longer ONLY MINE. That triggers a kneejerk aversion to others’ territory, which she now is.
After decades of impassioned Gomez & Morticia-style romance, I have no clue if I even Love her anymore. Something feels extinguished between us. There is a loss of respect—for the first time, my wife’s worth has fallen in my eyes. I saw her defile every renewed vow. It’s burned into me: she is substandard. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. My beloved is suffering. Why am I on the verge of abandoning her!? MY WIFE’S PERSPECTIVE
Wifey insists that she deserves patience as she tackles her trauma. Is Wifey right? I am going to copy/paste that text message from her here. Only fair to include both sides.
“Mon Amour, before you sink too deep with ghastly divorce ideas, may I please remind you one thing? I had infinite patience while you wrestled with your demons…I sacrificed myself to my depths for your healing and stayed even when I should have fled. You bemoan loss of trust online while I lived many years never feeling safe to trust you face to face!!!!!! But I never gave up on Love and the amazing man I saw beneath your shadows…my Ideal Man you have now become!
My alters twist and blur my thoughts dreadfully until I forget everything I have now…but they are NOT ME. You also were not yourself when you were lost…I fought so much to free you from problems and I would pray not to be abandoned when my own problems catch up with me…no one can heal their distortions overnight. “In sickness and in health” hm? I am sick. Why throw me away now? I do not feel this is very fair no matter how utterly loathsome my own actions…you know I shall always regret succumbing again. Alters aside I should have been proactive when I still had control and listened to Mama and even Mods warning me to turn off DMs when I signed up. I overestimated myself and now I pay many prices for my idiocy.
You do good job punishing me with ice already…I beg you be merciful enough to stay while I cleanse…please…we are like in the Destino animation…meant to be together but lost among shifting sands and obstacles trying to separate us…please do not forget Our Destiny of Love…remember, we don’t say goodbye…J’taime Éternellement!!” CLOSING QUESTIONS
How do I cure the disenchantment / indifference? If I decide to stay, how do we rebuild when we lack solid rubble for a new reconstruction? How do I stop her restlessness to cheat? Is my wife getting exploited similarly to a drunk woman or is she culpable for her cheating? Am I the real failure here? Is this worth fighting for? Am I the real failure here? TL;DR: Our Marriage is plagued by a shared abusive childhood, wife’s DID in particular. In 2022 an online predator reactivated her trauma programs through sexting. The fortified issues were never resolved, thus her alters cheated again once new predators DMed her in 2023. I hit my tolerance limit and something extinguished between us. I need advice on how to help my wife and rekindle Love.
hello everyone! i am making this post to see if anyone has advice, encouragement, etc.
i am a part of a sorority at an sec school with about 200 members in it. i have been thinking about a lot lately concerning the pros and cons of staying in my sorority. I joined last semester through cob so even though i’m a sophomore they consider me pc ‘22.
Pros: I am more involved on campus and I got to meet new people. I have more community service experience and I was able to go to have experiences i didn’t have before
Cons: it is very cliquey especially within those my grade level and are not open to new friends. I made some acquaintances within my pc but none that i would say i’m close with. my biggest concern is the price, i will be paying $900 both next semester and spring ‘24 for something i’m not 100% on. not to mention on top of that i probably will have to take a little due to how large the new pledge class is projected to be. I also do not like the fact that the sorority puts too much emphasis on the fact that we’re considered a “bottom tier” sorority when rankings are not even based on merit at my school. there is also some “political” stuff that i have issues with within nationals and the chapter itself concerning women’s/lgtq rights and the lack of activism. i am also working two jobs next semester to pay for study abroad next summer so i feel like scheduling would clash.
there’s other minor issues that aren’t really that deep but those are the main biggest things for me atm. any comments would be greatly appreciated!
My girlfriend and I have been dating since freshman year. I asked her to our first prom and she reluctantly obliged. She’s Evil, so it took her a while to warm up to my charm, but eventually she fell hard for me. We’ve gone to every prom together since, and I voted her Prom Royalty every time. Now it’s junior year, and my schedule was ramping up with exam season and football team hijinks. I was so busy and hadn’t seen her at school since we don’t have classes together. Every prom I made a poster for her, but this time I decided to go with a note in her locker. She called me gross and weird, and denied my promposal. I was humiliated and rumors spread fast. We met up later that day and argued about the situation. We ended up breaking up. I still love her, I think. So…AITA?
P.S. Now I’m going to that prom as friends with Liv Rooney.