Adopt me values

It’s my biggest trigger. When his boyfriend comes and sleeps over or when he leaves to go visit his boyfriend. It fills me with so much emotion, negative thoughts, and self hatred that it actually feels like I’m gonna drive myself into the ground. For the entire time I don’t think straight and completely leave my body. All i think about is them together, how they probably share a bond I’ll never have with my FP, how i lose all value to my FP now that they’re in a relationship. I know it’s irrational, and it’s really really negatively impacting my daily life and also my relationship with my FP. It’s awful and has been so exhausting. I don’t know what to do and it feels so isolating. The trigger is always right in my face and there’s nothing i can do about it. I don’t want to push him away but I also feel so fucking depressed about it constantly.
Sorry for ranting, it’s been a hard fucking night

This is more of a off my chest as I am riddled with anxiety and frustration right now. I have two younger ladies, and a soon to be 6 year old boar. The boar isn’t doing too well. He lost some weight. 2 days ago he underwent sedation because his teeth were bad and he needs to be able to eat, they gave him extra fluids as he was having mushy poops and the bloodtest showed elevated liver value. I’m going to get a referal for that. The thing is I work as a nurse in a different town, takes me two hours between doors. My SO works from home so he can keep an eye on them and feed them and such. The piggie was fine but a bit out of it after sedation, it’s expected. He ate his veggies with enthusiasm. But when I got home yesterday, 24h after sedation, he looked like he was in pain, his stool was like puddles and he didn’t want to eat hay. He really had an apetite for critical care tho and his pellets so that’s something. I have stopped giving him veggies for now, and I gave him critical care with fresh poo from my healthy pigs along with vitamin C (+the metacam according to the vets order). I expressed my concearns to my SO that the pig is in pain, having diarrea is very bad as they can lose blood volume and he is not eating hay and SO thinks I’m just getting ahead of myself and that we should wait. This was last night, now it’s friday morning, our only chance to see an exotic vet before the weekend in case he gets worse. I can’t take the day off as we are low staffed and we would have to send every booked patient home. I’m talking about cancer patients and such that have been waiting for their exam for weeks and months. I really want my SO to just listen to me and let me book an appointment so he can take him to the vet, it’s just an 8 minute drive from home. I’m very worried his health will deteriorate, and that we would have to go to an emergency vet during the weekends where there are no exotic vets. Last time I took a guinea pig there, we waited for hours, I KNEW that the window where a possible bounceback to health if he gets the care now, was closing. Yet when I told the nurse this, she just said ”he isn’t dying so you have to wait for your turn” if he was dying it would be too late to do anything. They know dogs and cats, they don’t know cavies. I’m also googling how other people can have guinea pigs while having a job like I do, and everyone says it’s fine. In truth it is absolute HELL when you have a sick guinea pig, and they get sick often especially the elderly, and the conflict between that and not being able to take time off work as much as you need in those situations. It’s just really difficult right now and I am so worried. I really want him to pull through it and atleast get to experience the fresh grass when the weather turns

TL;DR at the bottom.
My (32f) husband (34m) and husband’s daughter (16f) have 3 dogs. We each “own” one. I’ve worked from home for 3 years, and all of the dogs have been adopted since Jan 2022.
I was under the impression that the dogs were a shared responsibility, but since I worked from home I took a bigger role on their care without hesitation since I LOVE dogs and was already with them day in and day out.
The “mandatory” care includes feedings (morning and evening), baths, vet appointments, basic manners training, kenneling at night/letting them out in the morning, making sure trash is picked up so they don’t eat something they shouldn’t and die, kenneling/putting the husky mix (my dog) outside in our fenced backyard when no one is around to supervise because she has separation anxiety and chews when alone (shoes, sentimental items, the fucking couch, EVERYTHING). The “fun” care is giving them a million bajillion kisses, cuddles, scrunches, stupid songs I make up about them and sing to them, treats, etc. I’ve know the majority of their care has fallen on me, but had no complaints because working from home made it no biggie and brought me joy to love on them throughout the day.
Over the last year, my husband and I have gone out on many date nights. Before leaving, I feed and put the dogs in the backyard because I know they’ll be unsupervised. Numerous times we come back home to a chewed couch cushion because daughter decides to let them in while we’re gone and then locks herself in her room and forgets that they’re inside. I get chewed out because the husky mix is “my” dog and my responsibility. In my mind, I did my due diligence by putting her in the back yard away from things to chew, and it’s not my fault she was let back inside.
Daughter loves sleeping with “her” dog (chihuahua mix), and I think it’s sweet. Problem is, is that she lets her sleep in the bed, then goes to school, leaving her on the bed with her bedroom door closed. Her bed is tall, so the dog could injure herself if she tried to jump off the bed to the floor because of how small she is. The only reason she would try to jump off the bed is if she needed to relive herself. When working from home, before logging in to work (which is about 15-30 mins after husband takes daughter to school), I would go into her room, grab the dog, smother her in kisses, take her outside, and feed/water her. It silently bothered me a bit that she does none of the “mandatory” care and only participates in the “fun” care, but figured since I was home it wasn’t that big of a deal, and I love the dog so didn’t mind caring for her in the slightest. Just wished his daughter would provide more care and practice some responsibility since it’s “her” dog.
This week I got called into the office indefinitely. The first few days I did my normal care in the morning (outside, food, water, good morning smooches and pets), and came home and did the evening routine. Last night I came home later than anticipated, rushed out for date night with my other partner (poly, don’t judge and has no impact on scenario) and spent the night there. I went to work straight from my partner’s house. Came home and one of the dogs (husband’s dog) wasn’t hanging out with me like he normally does. I didn’t think much of it until a few hours of not seeing him, so I looked around for him. Found him staring at his food bowl outside, looking sad as fuck. Immediately fed him and he was back to his normal self. He’s very food motivated, but normally he’ll come whine for food vs be absent, so was definitely weird.
I texted our family chat asking if either of them fed the dogs this morning, and the response I received was “No I don’t think so.” I responded with “K. My bad I didn’t say anything about it, but now that im in the office i need yall to feed/water them when I’m not home. I.e. staying the night at [partner’s] house, a trip, ect.” I feel that was a chill response, but I’m honestly boiling inside and really angry.
Im thinking back to every time they’ve bragged about “their” dogs being awesome and how they love them so much, but have 0 to do with their “mandatory” care and can’t even feed them without me asking them to in my absence. I’m not even sure if they were fed last night, meaning they went 24 hours without eating because I wasn’t home for them like I normally am.
I’m angry that every time any of the dogs does something bad (chewing, accidents in the house, etc.) that it’s my fault, even though I’m the only one actually trying to find solutions and train them.
I’m super sad that I can’t spend all day with them like I did when I worked from home (which is all they’ve know) and feeling like no one else in this house cares about them enough except for me.
I feel mad at myself for assuming my family would feed the dogs at the bare minimum because I have taken on that duty.
This can’t happen again, and feel like unless I send reminders to care for the dogs every time Im away that it’ll happen again. I feel my original text is too nice and won’t elicit change, trying to figure out what to say/do from here. Any suggestions are welcome! Also, if you think I’m irrational and unfair, please explain why and provide feedback. Yeah I’m venting, but also looking for solid advice on what to do from here.
TL;DR I take care of my family’s dogs, was gone for a night and discovered that since I didn’t remind others to feed the dogs that they went hungry and I’m pissed off. What should I do?

This is a throw away account
Also English is my 2nd language so please excuse my errors and grammar.
So to start I [26m] have been in 2 relationships in my life time. My first ex cheated on me physically and emotionally and it lasted about 10 months, 2nd ex was the longest relationship I ever had which was a span of 5 years. We started dating when we were college and I really thought she was the one I was gonna spend my life with but when I found out that she was already cheating with her co-worker it broke me because I had already thought of proposing to her. When I confronted her she made up excuses like any other person would say like I didn’t give enough attention, I neglected her, or I wasn’t satisfying her. It hurt because she was talking behind my back with this guy and it revealed a side which I never thought my ex was capable of. But all that was 6 months ago so I’m slowly recovering.
My problem is that lately I have been hanging around with my friend group going to bars, clubbing, and just y’know chilling. I have friend named John[28m] and he is a “player” which in other words that people call him is a“fuck boy” every time when our group is hanging out I see him walk off our leave with women and y’know all that stuff. Now my problem isn’t that he is leaving with a girl or women every time we’re hanging out my problem is that every women he flirts with are either married, in a relationship, or have partners.
I voiced my opinion to the group and asked what they thought about it, they just brushed it off saying it’s not their problem and that it’s messed up but they can’t do anything.
I asked John why he did it and that if he ever felt guilty that he is screwing around with married women and potentially ruining someone’s marriage. And he’s like (his words)
“Hell no, why tf should I care they came to me if they really loved there husbands or bf they wouldn’t have screwed around with me, plus somebody’s gotta satisfy them. You can easily pick women up just talk about there relationship and talk about there flaws and use that as leverage and they will give in”
I’m not sure what the feeling is but every time I hear about someone cheating guy/girl I feel dread, or empathy. It’s a feeling I can’t describe but I feel anger and sadness about cheating. I read about it on Reddit and every time I read it I just feel sad for the person that got cheated on.
-Notable problems that I see are either-
They met someone else while in a relationship
Failed to communicate
Sex life is going horrible
Or they are either under the influence or irresponsible
No trust
and the list goes on.
Now what my friend said got me curious so I thought about experimenting. I’m considered a somewhat handsome,or a cute face like most girls say and I lost a lot of weight after HS. I had a line men body half fat and half muscle but I lost all that fat since I was motivated to lose it. So I used that as advantage to flirt with women or girls that were in a relationship 90% of the time it would work and then 10% it wouldn’t. The ones that did work talked about their problems in their relationship and all that stuff and I just sat there listening and when the time came either her or I would offer to go to each others apartments. If the women asked I would respectfully decline and just make up some excuse and if I asked I would just come up with another dumb excuse. They would give me there number but I wouldn’t contact them.
In the end this got me thinking that this can happen to anybody that no matter how good or bad it is there will always be flaw and that flaw will determine the guy/girls action.
This is where my mistake happens I went to a fancy dinner party where all branches of my work met together and we ate and danced. I was just drinking until I met a women named Scarlet[37f] and I tell you she was a really beautiful women she had beautiful hair,good body figure, nice smile and a good sense of humor. And y’know we just started talking and then it went to flirting then we just danced. I was getting stares from other men because apparently she was considered a top value worker in her branch and I guess they wanted to dance with her but she refused and stayed with me. Then next thing y’know we’re making out in my car then we go to my apartment and then I guess y’know what happens.
That morning we just stayed there laying in bed talking about what happened.
(We considered it the best sex in our life’s)
Then she dropped a bombshell she was married but before I could say anything she started crying because she never thought she would do the same thing her husband did.
Apparently her husband had cheated on her and she showed me picture of him sexting with a other women. And it was her idea to see if they could fix there marriage but that every time she tried to be intimate with him she felt sad or she felt that it didn’t feel the same anymore.
I guess I’m just here because I feel guilty and scared about the idea of being betrayed again.

Hi everyone! I'm currently fostering a mom and her 4-5 month old kitten. I've had them a month and I thought they would do really well adopted out as a pair and now I'm not so sure. The last week I've seen a change in her demeanor towards him. If I'm patting her and he enters the room she runs away, they spend a lot of time fighting and sometimes it looks like playing but other times it seems like she's super annoyed and she will growl or hiss and run away from him. When she is angry like this she also doesn't like being approached by my partner and I and it just makes me feel really sad :( I had someone interested in taking both of them but now I feel like that may not be what's best for her. Has anyone else has this happen? Any advice would be great as well :)

I know there's a lot of doom and gloom on here but I wanted to share something that I couldn't believe myself until I did it. I work at one of the major telecom companies in America and after doing a few of their "courses" and exams(which were free to me) I was able to bag a 32% raise for the year(not counting what I get at the end of the year for a performance raise) I know it is a tech field but there is still hope for some companies in valuing their employees! Anyway cheers 🥂

Demographics

• Gender: Female
• Race/Ethnicity: White (Indigenous North African) and Asian (Chinese-Indonesian)
• Residence: GA
• Income Bracket: Middle-class (~70k), going for financial aid
• Type of School: Middle-sized non-competitive public
• Hooks: First-Gen

Intended Major(s): Political Science/Government/International Affairs
Academics

• GPA (UW/W): 4.0UW, 4.6W
• Rank (or percentile): 2 out of ~345
• # of Honors/AP/IB/Dual Enrollment/etc.:
  • 12 Honors: Spanish 1-4, Freshman Lit, World Lit, Algebra 1-2, Geometry, Pre-Calculus, Biology, Chemistry (Spanish 1, Algebra 1, and Geometry were all done during middle school)
  • 15 APs: Human Geo, European History, Psychology, Art History, Language, Statistics, Calc AB & BC, Biology, US History, World History, Government, Macroeconomics, Microeconomics, Literature
  • 3 Dual Enrollment: Poetry elective, Sociology, Philosophy
• Senior Year Course Load: AP Psychology, AP Government, AP Art History, AP English Lit, AP Macroeconomics, AP Microeconomics, DE Sociology 101, DE Philosophy 101

Standardized Testing

• SAT I: 1420 (730R, 690M)
• SAT II: 1450 (800R, 650M)
  • Went test-optional for most schools LOL
• AP/IB: AP Calc BC - 3, AP Lang - 5, AP US History - 5, AP Stat - 4, AP World - 5, AP Human Geography - 5

Extracurriculars/Activities

1. Member of my county government's Youth Commission - Did community projects like park restorations, expos, other volunteer work.
2. Mock Trial Team Captain - 4 years on the team, 5x Outstanding Attorney Award recipient. Region and district champions.
3. Manager at a political consulting firm - Launched canvassing projects, managed new hires.
4. Student Government President
5. Social Media Intern with Young Democrats of GA
6. Percussion Section Leader in Marching Band
7. Poll Worker for the 2022 election season
8. Campaign Intern with a city race in New York
9. Senior Class Chair of my school's Beta Club
10. President of Rho Kappa Social Studies National Honor Society

Awards/Honors
List all awards and honors submitted on your application.

1. Alternate for a national political program (easily searchable so vague for privacy lol)
2. AP Scholar with Distinction
3. Finalist for GHP in Social Studies
4. All-A Honor Roll (honestly meant to switch this one out but forgot)
5. Georgia Certificate of Merit

Letters of Recommendation
I read all my LORs and I gotta say they def carried my application

1. AP World/AP Human Teacher: 10/10 - Known him since my freshman year, had him as a teacher for 9th/10th. He's like my adoptive grandpa and he knows a lot about my extracurriculars and my future aspirations. Mentioned how I was one of a kind and he hoped the letter could do me justice, he's the best.
   
2. AP Gov/Macro Teacher: 9/10 - Known her since my freshman year (she's the Mock Trial coach) and had her as a teacher senior year. Really cool lady; she used to be in politics so she's very supportive of my political aspirations. She likes me a lot and mentioned my maturity and responsibility a lot in my letter.
   
3. State Representative: 7/10 - Not as personal as the other ones since he doesn't know me as well, but still nice. He mentioned some of my more career-oriented aspects and he knows me fairly well; definitely more than the average state rep knows their constituent.
   
4. County Commissioner: 10/10 - Got to know her really well during the two years I did Activity #1 plus I helped her write the letter. This one especially touched a lot on the specific community work I did and my passion for helping my community. Out of all my letters, I think this one was the most important.
   

Interviews

1. Yale: 6/10 - I got my likely letter phone call an hour before the interview so I wasn't sure what to expect. Went in and did my best but I feel like I wasn't as charismatic as I usually was. My interviewer also just didn't seem to react positively to anything I said so that was a bit of a bummer.
   
2. Harvard: 10/10 - I feel like this interview carried my Harvard app. The interviewer was a really nice guy, funny and honest about his time there. He showed real genuine interest in me and my background, I ended up talking to him a lot about my less common ethnic background (Chinese and Moroccan) and I feel like I was able to articulate really well how my upbringing and perspective have been shaped by my background.
   

Essays
Personal Statement: 8/10 - I tried to take a unique approach and talk about a lot of topics relating to who I am as a person. I used this overarching theme of my love for browsing Wikipedia and connected the things I learned on there to learning about aspects of myself. Completely overhauled the last paragraph in the last few days (but not before I submitted the old one to Georgetown and Harvard :,) haha)
Harvard Supplemental: 7/10 - I was on a time crunch to write this one since I was going out of the country. It's mostly a Frankenstein essay made up of bits and pieces of other essays I had written over the course of a year for college and scholarship-related things. More focus on my identity and how its shaped me.
Yale Supplemental: 9/10 - I felt like I did pretty good on these. I took a few days to write them all, the short response ones were especially good. I tried to be witty here and there and I think it worked.
Georgetown Essays: 8/10 - I gave myself plenty of time to write these and honestly thought they were pretty good. I would say these are the best bunch and they really let me showcase my passion and aspirations.
All other essays: 6/10 - They're all a blur at this point. Not the worst but definitely room for improvement since I kind of powered through them. Didn't get any outside feedback on any of my essays so I went in raw lol.
Decisions
Acceptances:

• Georgia Institute of Technology (EA)
• University of Georgia (EA)
• Georgia State University (RD)
• Berry College (RD)
• George Washington University (RD)
• Yale University (RD with a likely!!!!!)
• Harvard University (RD)

Waitlists:

• Colby College (RD)
• Northeastern University (RD)
• Smith College (RD)
• Georgetown University (RD)

Rejections:

• Cornell University (RD)

Additional Information:
All in all a crazy year for me. I still can't believe it sometimes but I'm glad it's all over! For what it's worth, I think my application on paper isn't the most outstanding compared to others that are on college subreddits (coughcoughA2C) but what really made up for it was my interviews and rec letters. Regardless, so happy and thankful for this decision season and wouldn't change it for the world!

I adopted a cat nearly three weeks ago, it’s the first one I’ve owned on my own, but I’ve grown up with cats for my entire life. George has screamed and meowed extremely loudly since I got him, every night for about two hours at about 3-4am. It wakes me up every night and I can’t get back to sleep. It’s making me extremely miserable and I’m exhausted.
George is 15, so an older cat, and has had a traumatic year (owner died, various foster homes, now me). But at every other point he seems quite settled with me, happy to sleep near me, plays, eats his food, drinks his water. At every other point in the day bar those two hours he seems like a happy cat.
We had to go to the vet 8 days into having him because he hadn’t pooed once at mine. The vet sorted him out, checked him over, said the not pooing was probably due to the stress of his move into mine, did various checks and put it down to anxiety. He has now started pooing at mine and this particular issue seems okay. I also sent him George’s medical history.
George had an operation before being fostered to me by the charity that rescued him in January. They wouldn’t have done the operation had he not been well and would have put him down if he hadn’t been.
I have tried everything to “soothe him” - I have locked him in one room overnight but I can still hear him crying when I do that, I’ve let him wander round the house. I’ve fed him, made sure he has water, I’ve stayed up with him and given him company in case he was lonely. Nothing I do helps or changes anything.
Does anyone have any advice?

Really interested in the 2024 crosstrek, looking at getting the touring (premium) or a CX30. I’d go Onyx(sport) however I find the yellow interior hideous so I’d be willing to take a hit in a smaller engine (2.0) minus features. The touring(premium) has cloth seats, no sunroof etc for 39k after tax where as the CX 30 GS with luxury package comes with bigger engine, sunroof, Bose speakers, and leather seats for 39k as well (Canadian dollars) so that’s 28.8k USD. Which is the better value? Can you guys convince me the Crosstrek is the better buy? I really like the look of it, thanks!!

Recently (but not that recently considering it's been more than a year now), I've had no real friends or close relationships. All the friends I previously had were either extremely toxic or simply drifted away, and despite my constant efforts to meet new people through clubs or activities I just can't ever seem to become close to anyone. I'm genderfluid so that already eliminates most people as possible friends because of how few people are willing to try and understand what it means, and after years of being passive I'm just not going to let people dehumanize me the way they do anymore. But ever since I gained some self respect I've realized just how few people there are who are open minded enough to even give me a chance. I'm in my late teens so of course most of my peers are immature, but my threshold for respect is basically just being open to seeing me for who I am, and not abusing me sexually (which is apparently much more of an obstacle than you'd think). I have a lot of acquaintances because people tend to find me interesting or nice at first, but I still don't have anyone I could really consider close because of how difficult it is for most people to understand me with all my queerness and neurodivergencies (I'm "gifted"). People don't like having to break out of the social norms and getting to know me is basically that incarnate apparently.
It's really hard talking about all this because if you yourself don't have any experience with being queer and neurodivergent then everything I'm saying just sounds like another teenager trying to be "edgy and different" when in reality I'm just being genuine about my experiences. I really am different, and nothing I've ever tried to be like the vast majority has worked or been healthy.
I really don't know what to try anymore, because I've tried putting myself out there as much as I could but I still just spend all my time alone. People always say I just need to learn to be good enough for myself but the people who say that don't understand what it's like to truly and completely have absolutely no one on your side in life, no one to share joy with or get to know mutually. I enjoy time alone too but there's such a big difference in sanity when I'm left with the knowledge that if I died at any moment there would be no one who's ever known me to remember me. I've been told it'll get better for me in college since my mind is such a barrier now, and in college I can find others who have similar passions, but I really can't keep going through life having my entire childhood be filled with more derealization/dissociation, and a traumatic sense of loneliness. Already I struggle even believing that I could ever be close to anyone, and if I just spend this time waiting I feel like I might never learn how to. Honestly at this point would it be better for me to just force myself to be what people want the way I see everyone around me doing? Should I just conform for the time being so that even if I'm still miserable at least I could have a small sense of feeling valued? I may be "gifted" and I may be more mature, but I'm still someone who's brains developing and it's so disorienting going through life with this sense of being frozen until the world's ready for me. I'm tired of being completely separate from the world I'm supposed to live in.
Edit: I feel like I should also mention that even among the other queer people I've met I don't fit in because they also tend to be extremely shallow. All of the queer people I know admit to caring about appearance more than anything, and I feel like it's probably part to do with them being really scared and insecure with how things are. I'm a really nuanced person and a lot of people my age aren't really like that because they care about popularity and fitting certain aesthetics more than knowing themselves and others. It's a really toxic and competitive environment and people are always ready to use others or talk shit behind their backs, and that's just not something I feel comfortable with usually. I don't really get involved with drama and because of that people don't like me since my opinions aren't as "fuck them, they made a mistake so I now think they're a horrible person forever and I don't care about their reasons or motives!!! Let's jump them in the parking lot!!" I actually care about getting to the core of people and that usually scares them. People want me to hate with them as a way to bond and I don't know it just feels really wrong.

I am 31 now. And still struggle so terribly with my home. I’ve made a ton of progress but it’s not good enough.
Quick backstory: Adopted for my parents face value. 100%. No physical trauma. But severe emotional neglect. Never was told “I love you”. Blamed for everything. Never stood up for as a child. Grew up in the middle of nowhere with no siblings so I was very lonely. My mother is a hoarder and never taught me anything. I first learned to do dishes at age 18 when I moved out. My home before this was absolutely trashed. Moved into my late grandmothers house that she left me. And no it’s not perfect at all. I struggle so hard.
Currently, I’m going through a lot of feelings as my adoptive father is in/out of the hospital for something rather serious. So my emotions fluctuate between sympathy and resentment, as they can’t help me out with my kiddos and am having a hard time keeping commitments to work etc. So I believe that is really making me regress with my progress.
My fiancé grew up in a VERY clean environment. Almost too strict. His father would get very angry if he didn’t do things a certain way. So my fiancé is getting angry at me now because I am having a hard time maintaining things.
Some of the areas I need guidance in:

• Prioritizing what needs done (should I sweep? Should I do laundry? etc.)
  
• What foods to keep on hand. And how to shop for grocery’s smartly.
  
• The general discipline to start cleaning.
  
• A basic list of stuff that needs done (someone can make one for me lol) And how to do it myself.
  
• How often should I do certain things (sweep, laundry, wash sheets etc)
  

If anyone has any good tips they’ve learned, let me know!
Also- I am diagnosed with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) , PTSD, and ADHD.

I am 31 now. And still struggle so terribly with my home. I’ve made a ton of progress but it’s not good enough.
Quick backstory: Adopted for my parents face value. 100%. No physical trauma. But severe emotional neglect. Never was told “I love you”. Blamed for everything. Never stood up for as a child. Grew up in the middle of nowhere with no siblings so I was very lonely. My mother is a hoarder and never taught me anything. I first learned to do dishes at age 18 when I moved out. My home before this was absolutely trashed. Moved into my late grandmothers house that she left me. And no it’s not perfect at all. I struggle so hard.
Currently, I’m going through a lot of feelings as my adoptive father is in/out of the hospital for something rather serious. So my emotions fluctuate between sympathy and resentment, as they can’t help me out with my kiddos and am having a hard time keeping commitments to work etc. So I believe that is really making me regress with my progress.
My fiancé grew up in a VERY clean environment. Almost too strict. His father would get very angry if he didn’t do things a certain way. So my fiancé is getting angry at me now because I am having a hard time maintaining things.
Some of the areas I need guidance in:

• Prioritizing what needs done (should I sweep? Should I do laundry? etc.)
  
• What foods to keep on hand. And how to shop for grocery’s smartly.
  
• The general discipline to start cleaning.
  
• A basic list of stuff that needs done (someone can make one for me lol) And how to do it myself.
  
• How often should I do certain things (sweep, laundry, wash sheets etc)
  

If anyone has any good tips they’ve learned, let me know!
Also- I am diagnosed with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) , PTSD, and ADHD.

Hi, I just started a new job earning 75k and HR handed me a CPT30 form today and I'm not sure how to proceed.
Should I start taking CPP and keep contributing to CPP? I just turned 65 last month and have worked in Canada for 30 years. Not in the greatest health, one kidney removed from cancer.
What about OAS? Should I take both and invest the difference now? What about OAS claw-back
​
Other info
90k total RRSPs between myself and wife, wife (60) is self employed earning 15k
8k TFSA
220k Mortgage (property valued at 850k)
9k HELOC balance
4k CC balance
​
Any advice is very helpful, what strategy would be best for this scenario

Note: I am diagnosed with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) , PTSD, and ADHD.
I am 31 now. And still struggle so terribly with my home. I’ve made a ton of progress but it’s not good enough.
Quick backstory: Adopted for my parents face value. 100%. No physical trauma. But severe emotional neglect. Never was told “I love you”. Blamed for everything. Never stood up for as a child. Grew up in the middle of nowhere with no siblings so I was very lonely. My mother is a hoarder and never taught me anything. I first learned to do dishes at age 18 when I moved out. My home before this was absolutely trashed. Moved into my late grandmothers house that she left me. And no it’s not perfect at all. I struggle so hard.
Currently, I’m going through a lot of feelings as my adoptive father is in/out of the hospital for something rather serious. So my emotions fluctuate between sympathy and resentment, as they can’t help me out with my kiddos and am having a hard time keeping commitments to work etc. So I believe that is really making me regress with my progress.
My fiancé grew up in a VERY clean environment. Almost too strict. His father would get very angry if he didn’t do things a certain way. So my fiancé is getting angry at me now because I am having a hard time maintaining things.
Some of the areas I need guidance in:

• Prioritizing what needs done (should I sweep? Should I do laundry? etc.)
  
• What foods to keep on hand. And how to shop for grocery’s smartly.
  
• The general discipline to start cleaning.
  
• A basic list of stuff that needs done (someone can make one for me lol) And how to do it myself.
  
• How often should I do certain things (sweep, laundry, wash sheets etc)
  

If anyone has any good tips they’ve learned, let me know!

I was been using 9.1.5 version of grafana for few months and I thought of getting rid of the all useless things in the alert email notification which used to contain lot of useless stuff. For example,
📷image876×286 17.3 KB
I just need the metric/VM name and the corresponding threshold value for which it triggered the alert email. I tried writing some customized go templates but nothing worked for me as expected. While referring to the following grafana document link, I read that alert email in the latest version of grafana i.e. 9.4.7 is updated which gives only the threhold value. So, I have installed the latest version grafana 9.4.7.In the latest version, I agree that we are getting only the threshold value in the alert email but, no where in the email it has mentioned about the VM/metric name which confuses us when we are dealing with multiple queries in a single alert rule. The value in new alert email is,
📷image1034×352 7.92 KB
Finally, my ask here is do I have any chance of getting the VM/metric name and the corresponding threshold value beside that.And also I was wondering how can I get the VM/metric name in custom go templates. (What is the template that gives me all the metrics/vm’s that were defined in an alert rule).

Some backstory:
I first met my gf online about a year ago. We met on Tinder while I was in NC for a vacation. I currently live on VA, 2.5 hrs away. We chatted online and over Skype for about 4 months while I was on a job in Oklahoma. In may of last year, I met her for the first time in person. Since then, I’ve moved back to VA. We visit each other on average 2 time a month for weekends and sometimes longer trips. She is a very nice and sweet girl, who has a good sense of humor and is low maintenance, like myself. We are each other’s first serious relationship.
The Mom situation:
She lives at home with her mother. Her mother is divorced and is very socially conservative. My GF is also an adopted daughter, along with her older sister (not related). Her sister (24) just recently moved out, so my gf is the last baby bird in the nest. That is all to say, her mom is not ok with her daughter spending nights away with some boy, much less traveling off to VA for the weekend with me. So far, the times she has come, she has lied to her mom that she was going to visit friends back in college ( she graduated a year early). I’ve met her mom several times and we hit it off, but I have no idea when she’ll accept that I’m not an evil man trying to steal her daughter.
My situation:
I am also living at home with my mother. I lived in OK for 6 months last year, and came back last September when my job contract ended. I did not expect to still be living at home neary 7 months after coming back. I am financially and emotionally capable of living on my own, and am definitely ready to move out. I’m ready for the next chapter in my life.
The problem:
I’m not sure how to balance my desire for…personal progress(?) with my GF’s situation and her helicopter mom. My gf is several years younger than me, a year out of college. When I was her age, I was living with my parents - still am! I can’t expect her to want to move in with me or get her own place so that we are out from under the Sauron gaze of her mother. I could also just move down to NC to be near her, but the idea of moving away from my family and VA lifestyle, to a place where I know no one, just to be near a girl who I wouldn’t even be able to spend the nights with seems very lonely. The final option (I see) would be to move out to my own apartment near my mom’s current place just so that I can say that I’m not still living at home. This doesn’t solve the long distance problem though, ties me down further to VA through a lease, and results in me now paying rent (I’m not currently paying rent at my mom’s place bc she is v nice and doesn’t expect me to). Other options, like moving to Boston where I went to college and still have a lot of buddies and where I’d love to live, wouldn’t work since it’s simply too far from NC.
One silver lining is that I am soon going to spend a month down in NC at a relative’s place while they are out of town. It’ll be a good way of seeing if I like the area and spend more consistent time with my gf and getting her mom more comfortable with me. I don’t know how excited her mom will be to have her staying nights out knowing I’m in town - likely not excited at all. I like this girl, but I’m not sure how long I can deal with the helicopter mom stuff (she’s nearly 22…c’mon now >.>) and how it impedes our relationship and my personal progress.

All the world needs is me. I’ve got my values, so you can keep yours, alright?

Stick it up Take it up Step aside and see the world...
Neku Sakuraba doesn’t know who he is. He woke up with no memories except that of his name in Shibuya, completely invisible to everyone surrounding him, with some pins in his pocket and a timer on his hand. Quickly he learns the rules of the new world he’s been thrust into - he’s part of the Reaper Game, a mysterious competition where the competitors fight monsters called Noise, and the losers get erased from reality. Neku is aloof, standoffish, and downright abrasive, but he’s going to have to learn to play nice with others quick if he wants to survive.

Pacts And Fusion Abilities

Neku can make “pacts” with people, as easily as asking them to join a pact and having them accept. When he is in a pact with a person, they share the same “health”, in that attacks done to one person will also harm the other person, healing done to one person will also heal the other person, etc. When he’s entered into a pact with someone, it creates a “green light puck”. Every time a person in the pact lands a combo, the puck passes to the other person, making them increasingly stronger as it goes back and forth. Thanks to a special blank pin, Neku and his pact partner can perform special fusion attacks if they “sync up” enough (if they have a strong enough bond and they’re ‘in the zone’ in combat). These are different for every person Neku makes a pact with, but the ones shown in-game include:

• Teleporting around and slashing at the enemy while shooting energy blasts everywhere
  
• Flying on a giant version of his partner’s psychokinetically-powered stuffed toy while energy explosions shoot off all over the place
  
• Standing on a giant version of his partner’s psychokinetically-powered stuffed toy while it shoots laser beams at people
  
• Dropping several objects on the opponent, including vending machines and cars
  
• Battering his opponents with a barrage of meteors
  
• Making the moon slam into Earth
  
• Creating a bunch of chains to attack enemies with
  
• Creating a big tidal wave to surf on while it submerges all foes
  
• With the power of all his friends combined, obliterates this Noise-Reaper-snake-monster thing
  

All fusion attacks heal Neku and his pact partner.

Psyches

Most of Neku’s powers come from pins which he can swap out at any time (able to use six pins at once). There are a little over 300 unique pins in the game, each with their own abilities (although some are similar). The comprehensive list of pins is linked - this section will not cover all of the pins, but instead the “psychs” or abilities he can gain from them.

• Energy Creation: The power to create constructs out of energy to attack opponents.
  
  • Can create energy bullets
  • Can create waves of penetrating bullets
  • Can create a spray of bullets
  • Can create flight-controlled bullets
  • Can create bullets that split into waves of bullets
  • Can create charged bullets that fragment on impact
  • Can create energy beams
  • Can create a large sword from energy
  • Can create a large spear from energy
• Energy Empowerment: The power to empower Neku with energy, making him stronger.
  
  • Can imbue his arms with energy to slash like a blade
  • Can empower him with energy to spin attack
  • Can empower his arms with energy to uppercut foes into the air
• Jabbing: The power to attack with jabs.
  
  • Can attack with a flurry of rapid jabs
  • Can jab opponents hard enough to knock them back
• Velocity Crash: The power to dash into opponents fast enough and hard enough to hurt them.
  
• Psychokinesis: The power to move objects with telekinesis.
  
  • Can lift someone off the ground and choke them
  • Can lift objects like cars and throw them at opponents
  • Can quickly fling objects
  • Can raise objects into the air before throwing them
• Electrokinesis: The power to attack opponents with electricity (specifically described as “lightning”).
  
  • Can mark enemies to blast them with lightning
  • Can send lightning down from any direction
  • Can shoot lightning from his hands
  • Can summon emblems that emit electricity
  • Can summon electric orbs which can either seek out enemies, move erratically, or circle Neku.
• Pyrokinesis: The power to attack opponents with fire.
  
  • Can create and manipulate a trail of fire
  • Can shoot flame blasts
  • Can create bouncing orbs of fire
  • Can create an emblem that explodes and shoots out fireballs
  • Can create a protective fire barrier around himself
  • Can focus on an enemy, then rapidly assault them with flames
• Cryokinesis: The power to attack opponents with ice.
  
  • Can create large ice spikes from the ground
  • Can focus on an enemy, then rapidly assault them with ice
  • Can encase enemies in ice
• Geokinesis: The power to attack opponents with earth.
  
  • Can call down a "meteor"
  • Can rain down boulders
  • Can create a localized earthquake
  • Can encase enemies in rock
• Aquakinesis: The power to attack opponents with water.
  
  • Can create a water barrier around himself, which also heals him
  • Can summon water orbs which damage enemies on contact
• Aerokinesis: The power to attack opponents with air.
  
  • Can summon whirlwinds to lift enemies and slam them
• Photokinesis: The power to attack opponents with light.
  
  • Can focus on an enemy, then rapidly assault them with light
• Erebokinesis: The power to attack opponents with darkness.
  
  • Can form a barrier of darkness around himself that heals him as it damages enemies
• Fragokinesis: The power to attack opponents with explosions.
  
  • Can turn objects into bombs
  • Can create spheres which explode
• Boomerang Summoning: The power to create boomerangs to attack foes.
  
  • Can summon dual boomerangs
• Barbed Wire Summoning: The power to create barbed wire to attack foes.
  
• Loudspeaker Summoning: The power to create large subwoofers to assault enemies with sound waves.
  
• Black Hole Summoning: The power to create a miniature "black hole" to suck in enemies.
  
  • Can vacuum in enemies and hold them in place
  • Can suck in enemies and destroy them
• Rhyme Summoning: The power to summon a small, friendly squirrel Noise to attack opponents.
  
• Invisibility: The power to become invisible.
  
• Teleportation: The power to teleport.
  
  • Can teleport short distances
  • Can teleport above an enemy and kick down on them
• Healing: The power to heal himself.
  
  • Can take out a soft drink and consume it to restore health
  • Can auto-heal at critical health
• Inflicting Ailments: The power to make foes’ health slowly deteriorate, decrease their attack power or defensive ability, or immobilize them.
  

Other Abilties

• Scanning: The power to listen to people’s thoughts through his headphones. He can also use this technique to locate Noise creatures which are otherwise invisible
  
• Imprinting: The power to influence people by sending words into their heads.
  
• Has a phone which can take pictures of the past (up to three a day)
  

Physicals

• Blitzes Shiki
  
• Can withstand cars falling on him
  
• Can take hits from Reaper-summoned lightning
  
• Can take hits from Beat, who can ollie hard enough to create shockwaves
  

Other

• Calculates the square root of 3 to seven decimal places in his head
  
• Fought and beat Sho Minamimoto (who has his own RT)