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Of Wolves and Thorns!

2023.05.28 07:29 Mannerless1 Of Wolves and Thorns!

Hello and welcome!
Here is the tale of my adventure with the headhunting banner we got for the Siracusa AK event, Through a path of briars...
So, I am a MASSIVE Texas fan, she's my girl, no one is better than my lovely, quiet and stalwart Texas, last of her name and prime pestering target of Lappland. Essentially this means I've been saving every single orundum I own ever since the announcement of a TEXAS EVENT! (oh god the excitement!)
Finally, our cool chika was gonna get her own event and even better than that, BECOME A 6 STAR OP!
So, I saved and saved, spending nothing on Mylnar's banner because I got him for free on my 4th pull (Yes, I know, you hate me :D) and managed to save 240k pure orundum, alongside my life savings of 720 OP, so basically I was SET AF for this banner.
And boy what a banner it was, I shall now tell you what happened and how:
Day one, hour one, minuet one - Spend all my free tokens/rolls/ten pull and get nothing.. spend another 30k and pull the girl, the lady, the wolf herself, my beloved TEXAS as I was sitting in my car waiting for the workday to start 15 mins from now. Absolute elation, listened to every voice line, made her main bae on the screen and immediately got her to E2/90 and began her road to M3 (third skill ofc). Used her absolutely everywhere and my god, she's so god damn powerful and cool (UGH, I'm such a simp! :P)
That was that for 2 days... I did the event and nothing else, that is until I just so happen to watch a video witch (and to my shame) showed me that in the Limited Pool was my favorite Horse Lady, the one and only Nearl The Radiant Knight, who to my shame, I had sobbingly failed to pull on her banner all those months ago.
Suddenly a fire was lit underneath me, I WILL NOT MISS THIS CHANCE AGAIN! I screamed internally, as I had every intention of pulling for Penance anyway to add her to my wonderous collection, but like on the last day after exhausting all the free pulls I got.
As I finish work and head home, the game resets and I get my daily free pull. Who should it be, but of course: Main Bae Texas once again! Which is fine because hey, why not right? But I'm no whale, I don't spend anything on this beautiful game other than my time (which I give freely) so getting another rank and reducing her already cheap DP -1 was fine with me, but the new mission was to spend all the necessary orundum to bring home NTR once and for all, and boy did I not know what the game had in store for me...
I lie on my bed, two pillows stuffed under my chest, hand gripped tightly... It was time to say goodbye to my mountain of orundum I had so cautiously saved, I was a man on a mission. I pulled 10 at a time, and to my surprise, I got so very many 6 stars!
First came Horn, the amazing "Tank" (LOL) that I Had been jibbed back a year ago and never got! Oh the envy I had over my friends, so that was simply amazing, next came (drumroll please...) YET ANOTHER TEXAS! WOW, I mean damn girl, I love you but STAHP! Nah, I could never be mad at you <3.
After that I got Stainless (eww) certainly didn't want him, but eh, another sixer never hurt. Next came another lady I didn't much care for in the form of Archetto, so I was like: "Oh cool, I spose" don't gotta grab her in the store now", but finally, I get a double pull and who does it happen to be? None other than the lady of Mafia backed Justice herself, Penance! or should I say, Penance and her twin sister, cos I got two of her in one pull, which is decent because she's got a high DP cost and I totally wanna abuse the game with her and mommy Mudrock /kiss.
On the way to 300 pulls, we're now sitting at 180, so we've passed the point of no return and then some, I go again and out comes Fiametta (Who I totally have the hawts for btw!) and despite her not quite fitting my all star team, she'll do will in my reserves, blowing fools to bits. So yeah, lots of decent luck on the way, every time the bag glows I'm just begging God to let me get NTR before 300 so I could be done and dusted.
We now enter the cold streak! Not a damn thing for ages, it's not until pity kicks in that I get another in the form of Blemishine, who is just cute and darling, but I already had... But hey, will take! We keep going and keep going and not we near the very end, we are at exactly 297/300 rolls, so it's time to stop my tenners, ignore the number on the top right having lost so much weight, and roll 3 little singles to the finish line.
I did exactly that, and the game poetically decided that on pull 300, I would yet once again get my main girl, my own true love, Texas for the fourth time! TALK ABOUT LIMITED! I sigh, give her a sly smile and tell her I loved her too (who knew this former gangster could be so damn clingy!)
I open the spark show, click on NTR and complete the mission! I bought her skin day one just in case I would ever get her (looking at you too Dusk -.-) and took her home where she belonged, with the hoard of other sixers I not gotta build after the Orirock event we got here ends, which is fine cos I got like 10 mil LMD anyway due to it being 1 of 2 stages I throw my energy at!
So, how's that for 300 pulls eh? 10 sixers, 10 free tokens, 1 free ten pull, 168,000 Orundumb leaving me with a widdle over 33k for the next limited (Yato) or whoomever else grabs my attention before then.
Well, ladies and gentlemen, that is the end of my story and the close of my adventure! Thank you for coming here and being a part of it, I can't wait to hear what you all think of this AK lover's go down in the comments, and to all, may Texas bring Blueberries and Dark Chocolate to your door for a nice romantic evening!
submitted by Mannerless1 to 0sanitymemes [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 06:29 yunepio Analysis of all religions (2/3)

​

Posts in the series:

Brief recap

In the previous post, we analyzed then eliminated the religions that didn't reference any God. Again, I am not claiming that any religion is true or false, simply that it can or cannot be a communications from a judging and fair God. The religions that we eliminated in the last post cannot possibly be communications from a judging and fair God. How can they be when they don't reference any God or Gods?!
--
In this post, we will continue our analysis. This time, we will analyze many religions, starting with those that do not have any known founder or messenger. We have already seen that a judging and fair God would choose indirect communication through a human messenger over direct communication with everyone (*). This makes the religions that do not have a founder or messenger susceptible to elimination, but let's analyze them correctly still.
(*) Please don't challenge this again here, we have already talked about it in previous posts! I shared all the arguments I had. If you're still not convinced, I have no more arguments for you. That said, in this reality, no God is communicating directly. So you can either choose to conclude that a judging and fair God doesn't exist, or you can evaluate the indirect communication possibility, which you should, based on the drawbacks of direct communication.
Let's begin!
Last time, we were left with the following religions:
The religions that do not have any known founder or messenger are: Hinduism, Voodoo and Tengrism.

Hinduism

Let's apply the message criteria to Hinduism to see what it passes and what it fails.
Sources:
(1) From WorldPopulationReview: ...Additionally, about 95% of the world's Hindus live in India. The majority of Hindus in India belong to the Shaivite and Vaishnavite denominations...

Voodoo

Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...It arose through a process of syncretism between several traditional religions of West and Central Africa and Roman Catholicism...

Tengrism

Sources:
(1) From New World Encyclopedia: ...Tengri is the supreme god of Tengriism. In ancient Mongolian cosmology, the Sky-Father (Tengri/Tenger Etseg) and Mother Earth (Eje/Gazar Eej) were the central beings of a group of 99 deities. The ancient Turks believed that Tengri was the leader of the seventeen deities who ruled the universe: Tengri, Yer-Sub, Umai, Erlik, Earth, Water, Fire, Sun, Moon, Star, Air, Clouds, Wind, Storm, Thunder and Lightning, and Rain and Rainbow...
--
This eliminates 3 more religions leaving us with the remaining religions that both reference a deity or deities, as well as have a known founder:
6 of the remaining religions above (the ones with an "x") reference the same God, the God of Abraham. Being related, we will analyze them together last. Let's move on with the others.

Sikhism

Let's analyze the message of Sikhism.
Now let's analyze Guru Nanak, the founder of Sikhism.
It is extremely unlikely that Sikhism represents a communication from a judging and fair God. It actually says so itself.
Sources:
(1) According to Wikipedia
(2) From Wikipedia: ...The Sikh scriptures use Hindu terminology, with references to the Vedas, and the names of gods and goddesses in Hindu bhakti movement traditions, such as Vishnu, Shiva, Brahma, Parvati, Lakshmi, Saraswati, Rama, Krishna, but not to worship. It also refers to the spiritual concepts in Hinduism (Ishvara, Bhagavan, Brahman) and the concept of God in Islam (Allah) to assert that these are just "alternate names for the Almighty One"...
(3) From Britannica: ...Nanak’s authorship of these works is beyond doubt, and it is also certain that he visited pilgrimage sites throughout India. Beyond this very little is known. The story of his life has been the imagined product of the legendary janam-sakhis (“life stories”), which were composed between 50 and 80 years after the Guru’s death in 1539, though only a tiny fraction of the material found in them can be affirmed as factual...
(4) From Britannica: ...Sikhs claim that their tradition has always been separate from Hinduism. Nevertheless, many Western scholars argue that in its earliest stage Sikhism was a movement within the Hindu tradition; Nanak, they point out, was raised a Hindu and eventually belonged to the Sant tradition of northern India... Their tradition drew heavily on the Vaishnava bhakti (the devotional movement within the Hindu tradition that worships the god Vishnu), though there were important differences between the two.
(5) From Britannica: ...Nanak composed many hymns, which were collected in the Adi Granth by Guru Arjan, the fifth Sikh Guru, in 1604...

Caodaism

Let's analyze the message of Caodaism.
Caodaism has multiple prophets: Ngô Văn Chiêu, Phạm Công Tắc, Cao Quỳnh Cư and Cao Hoài Sang. They fail most criteria.
It’s extremely unlikely that Caodaism is a true communication from a judging and fair God.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: He was born in 1878 and raised by his aunt. He developed an interest in Chinese folk religion during this period. Later he served in the colonial bureaucracy and developed a fascination with spiritism.
(2) From Wikipedia: In 1925, Phạm Công Tắc and two colleagues (Cao Quynh Cu and Cao Hoai Sang) tried to contact spiritual entities. Using table-tapping, they supposedly got messages: from their deceased relatives first, then from Saints, and then from God.
(3) From Wikipedia: Ngô Văn Chiêu, who had never intended Cao Đài to become a mass organization, left the movement and eventually established in 1932 an independent, esoteric branch known as Chiếu Minh, headquartered in Vĩnh Long, which still exists and only admits a limited number of committed adepts

Spiritism

Let's analyze Hippolyte Léon Denizard Rivail, the founder of Spiritism.
Spiritism is extremely unlikely to represent a communication from a judging and fair God. It implicitly says so itself.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...The movement has become widely accepted in Brazil due to Chico Xavier's works. There, the number of self-identified Spiritists accounts for 3.8 million, according to the 2010 national census...
(2) From Wikipedia: ...Rivail was in his early 50s when he became interested in séances, which were a popular entertainment at the time. Strange phenomena attributed to the action of spirits were considered a novelty, featuring objects that moved or "tapped", purportedly under the control of 'spirits'...

Cheondoism

Let's analyze the founder of Cheondoism.
It’s extremely unlikely that Cheondoism is a true communication from a judging and fair God.
Sources:
(1) From Britannica: There is no concept of eternal reward in Ch’ŏndogyo, because its vision is limited to bringing righteousness and peace to the world.
(2) From Britannica: ...Korean religion that combines elements of Confucianism, Buddhism, Taoism, shamanism, and Roman Catholicism...
(3) From Wikipedia: ...Although educated in Confucianism, he partook of Buddhist practices, rituals, and beliefs, including interacting with monks, visiting temples, and abstaining from meat. In 1856, he began a 49-day retreat in the Buddhist monastery of Naewon-sa, but had to leave on the 47th day to attend the funeral of his uncle. The next year he managed to complete the 49 days at Cheok-myeol Caves, but did not find the experience spiritually fulfilling.
(4) From Wikipedia: According to his own account, he was greatly concerned by the public disorder in Korea, the encroachments of Christianity, and the domination of East Asia by Western powers...

Tenrikyo

Now, let's analyze Nakayama herself.
There is no doubt that Nakayama Miki was deeply changed by her experience, as her life considerably changed after. However, Tenrikyo cannot be a communication from a judging and fair God. It misses the mark on critical criteria, and it says it itself that God’s purpose isn’t to judge humans.
Sources:
(1) From Wikipedia: ...In her childhood, Miki became familiar enough with Buddhist prayer so that by the age of twelve or thirteen, she was able to recite from memory various sutras as well the hymns from the Jōdo Wasan... At that time, she expressed an interest in becoming a nun... but eventually she consented, on the condition that even when married she would be allowed to continue her Buddhist prayer...
(2) From Wikipedia: ...However, as the woman who regularly served as his medium, Soyo, was not available, he asked Miki to serve as medium instead. In the middle of the incantation, Tenrikyo's doctrine asserts that Miki had her first divine revelation...
(3) From Wikipedia: ...For the three years or so following the revelation, Miki secluded herself in a storehouse. In the 1840s, Miki gradually gave away her personal belongings and the possessions of the Nakayama family. Then Miki requested that her husband Zenbei dismantle the main house, starting with the roof tiles at the southeast corner followed by the tiles on the northeast corner and the gable walls...
--
It has been a long post! However, we have evaluated a bunch of religions and all that remains for analysis are the Abrahamic religions, specifically:
Let's do that in the next post!
Note: What the hell happened in the 1800s? A lot of religions appeared near that time! If someone has an answer or a theory, please share in the comments. Thank you!
submitted by yunepio to DebateReligion [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 06:11 onebuddyforlife Reincarnated Into Another World As A Dicemaster Prologue

I rested my chin on the palm of my hand, overlooking the serene, green scenery of the rice fields outside of my classroom. The mountains stood tall and unmoving from afar, dividing the clouds that pass through its summit. I sigh in relaxation, appreciating the peaceful surroundings that one cannot find in the cities.
I snapped out of my quiet trance as a small truck carrying hay passed by the road, and I once again noticed the faint yet consistent mashes of buttons coming from my only friend in the province. Since our teacher announced that she had to leave class early, leaving us in class for the rest of our last period today, my friend over to my right has been playing the newly released game nonstop. The new MMORPG game, Alterra.
My blonde-haired friend Hirato was playing on a portable gaming console. His back has been arched towards the console for the past 15 minutes, his eyes are practically glued to the console’s screen. I inched my seat toward him to take a closer look. He was trying to defeat a monster resembling a three-headed snake—a Hydra. His character’s health was one hit away from hitting zero, but the Hydra was practically undamaged.
“Hey, Hirato,” I called him. “How long are you going to play that game?”
“Awww, I died!” He says exasperatedly, leaning back on his chair in annoyance. “I’ve been trying to beat this boss since yesterday and there’s no luck at all! I even have my gear maxed out for this level, and still...”
Hirato continued speaking as he packed his console into his backpack, “I wouldn’t have any problem at all had you continued playing video games with me. You could help me beat the boss, you know."
Then, Hirato started to make some "drama" in a weird, playful manner. "Come on, Naruki! We were best buddies since we were kids! Whatever must have happened between us, my best friend?” The bell rings across the school building, indicating the end of classes for the day. At the same time, I made a disgusted look at him after saying something corny that must have come from some TV show.
“Stop it with that little skit of yours. We are still best buddies, but I’ve grown up from playing games. Remember, we’re going to college next year and I’ve been preparing for it ever since.” I grabbed my bag from beneath my seat, and just as I stood up, the wooden plank I stood on creaked.
"That's not true, and there's no way you'll pass up on an MMORPG like Alterra! There's no way you stopped playing just for college." Hirato claimed, but he quickly switched into a pondering tone. “Though you made me think about college. You want to go to Tokyo University from what I recall, but I thought you were tired of the city because it’s too crowded there?” He asked.
“It’ll give me a greater chance to get hired for a job with a high salary. My dad also said that it takes some time to get used to the city when I’ve been living all my life in the rice fields.” I ignored Hirato's first statement--but it's true. There's no way I can quit gaming, so I lied to him about it, but I also don't want to take precious time off when I'm studying for a test that will literally decide my future.
“You’re already thinking of your future far ahead.”
“Well, do you want to stay in this school?”
As I took another step towards the door, the wood plank creaked again, filling the short silence in Hirato’s pause.
“...You make a point.” He uttered in agreement.
My school was a single-story building with multiple rooms, occupied by a few students in different grades. To add, we were also the only third-year high school students in the school. Everything here is made of thin wood and paper, and the wooden flooring creaked ever so often that if we step on it the wrong way, it might literally collapse the floor. This building was so old that I’d be having a family reunion with the souls of my family from five generations ago every school day.
The cool breeze of the late afternoon blew toward us as we made our way to the paved dirt road.
"By the way, Hirato."
"Hm?"
"I lied. I'm actually playing Alterra. Since it released."
"Wha-- Then why won't you play co-op with me?!" Hirato was almost screaming in my face, taken aback by my lie.
"Because you're stupid. Why would you cast "Damage Reflect" on Hydra's one-turn kill when you're barely alive? Plus, it won't even damage the Hydra because the game recognizes the reflected damage as an effect, and the boss is immune to any effect."
"Urgh... Watch me beat that Hydra tomorrow, you'll regret not playing with me!"
"Do your best, Hirato. See you tomorrow," I sarcastically said to him as I watched my best friend run to his home, probably excited to try out what I just said. After all, I'm way past his level, so I can't even play with him without ruining his casual experience. It's time to go home for me as well, but the next bus stop is an hour from now. Maybe I'll play for a bit while waiting.
It was the scent of fresh air and the quiet atmosphere that separates urban life from rural life. Most people prefer convenience, while the minority prefer peacefulness. I'm part of the latter, but I still want to get a job in the city. Even if I'm still unsure what I wanted to be in the future.
“Hey, you brat!” A faint, old man’s voice screamed from the rice fields beside the paved road. “Watch out, the ground is dangerous there! Didn’t you see the sign?!”
My thoughts were cut off as I heard him shout at me with great urgency. After my eyes dart to the old man, I abruptly turn to see that there was a sign on the side of the road on both sides that said [ENTRY CLOSED]. Why wasn’t there any blockage? But it was my fault for not paying close attention to my surroundings.
“I’m sorry, mister. I didn’t see it earlier.” I apologized in a nonchalant manner, mostly because I still didn't realize the gravity of the situation at this time.
“Let go of your bag. Climb over the fence towards me. Now,” says the man.
While I didn’t know what could be so dangerous about this road that warrants an urgent reaction, I trusted him. But before I could even drop my bag, the ground starts to sink with me in the center.
It was only then that fear started to settle within me. My heart sank from my inability to do anything as my mind tried to process what was happening and what was about to befall. My legs shook from the sinking ground as well, to control my balance. I cannot feel the center of gravity in my feet anymore.
In a desperate attempt to escape from the sinking ground, I jumped, trying to outrun the sinking before I go along with it.
Yet it was too late.
The ground crumbled beneath me, revealing a sinkhole. All the adrenaline in my body surges instantly, slowing down time and making the fall to my imminent death seem like an eternity. The rocks from the ground begin to break apart and fall as if it wants to bury me as well if I wasn't dead yet from the fall.
Strangely enough, I thought that when my time comes, I’ll accept Death and warmly embrace it, but it’s too soon and unfair. My arms are both outstretched to the sunlight above, as my mind screams, “I don’t want to die yet!”
The falling rocks fully cover the sunlight as I fully plunge into the darkness, and along it with me as well. Thankfully with the darkness blinding what seems to be my body being crushed and mutilated by the heavy rocks, it only felt like I fell asleep, never to wake up again.
Good night, world.
My eyes slowly fluttered open to a familiar ceiling; particularly, my bedroom. The dark blue-painted star walls and the transparent curtain were both familiar, yet in front of me was some child using my computer. The window outside is also blindingly bright which made it seem impossible to peek outside.
“Um...” I didn’t know what else to say, so I tried to get the young girl’s attention
“Mhmhm!” A proud, laughing sneer came from the child. Still sitting on my gaming chair, she turned around to face me, her shoulders crossed and an arrogant expression that ticks me off for some reason.
“Welcome to the afterlife, Naruhaya Tabito. I have chosen you to–wait, who the FUCK are you?!” Her arrogant expression transforms into a mix of confusion, panic, and surprise after she opened her eyes.
“I should be the one saying that!” I exclaimed back, but I did not get a response because she quickly turned to the monitor. Upon standing up from my bed, I notice that the sounds of mouse clicking and keyboard pressing were all attributed to her--playing Alterra?
If this was the afterlife... It didn't look too bad. The events that transpired earlier haven’t registered in my mind yet.
“Hey, am I really dead?” I asked her.
The young girl was typing before she exclaimed in panic, “No no no...! You’re really dead! I killed the wrong person!”
“I see.” I didn’t know how to react to my death, but I also didn't feel sad or sentimental. I didn’t have much going on in the real world before I died, after all.
The young girl paused her game as she turned around to face me. “It’s because you aren’t supposed to die! I may have pressed your name accidentally while I was looking for a suitable candidate in the Living Database...” She sighs as she sinks into her chair. “Well, I suppose it’s not that big of a deal.”
The girl stood on the gaming chair, clad in a red-colored robe with a two-pointed hat that almost resembled horns. Her red-toned eyes glinted with the light of the bright window.
“Naruki Haruhito, sit,” With one downward motion of her finger, I immediately felt a strong, compelling force that made me sit on the bed.
“My name is Filya, and I am the Goddess of Creation! Your Creator, and the One Above All!” She introduces herself with her arms crossed. It appears to me that she was trying to act superior and intimidating, but her haughty attitude, matched with her small stature, made it seem like she really was someone’s kid lost in my bedroom who was cosplaying as an anime character.
“You’re a child,” Even at this point in the afterlife, I do not believe her being the world’s creator for a bit.
“Wha–” Filya is taken aback by what I said. “I'm not a child, I'm a goddess! Respect and worship me, you dimwitted mortal, should you desire not to die a second time and leave your soul wandering in the empty void of space.”
While she was speaking, I couldn't move a single inch from the bed. Even if she was a goddess, it's impossible not to take her seriously because she looks like a child scolding her older brother.
Filya raised two fingers before saying, “As a token of apology for wrongfully smiting you, I’ll give you two choices. First choice: You can return back to the real world as a baby of a rich family, and you will be a prodigy who will basically have an easy life from that period until his death of old age. Of course, you won’t remember everything that happened here and in your past life. But that’s basically the same as having a guaranteed GAME CLEAR, in your terms.”
Having an assured future was my long-term goal when I was alive back then. It seemed like a compelling idea until I heard about the second choice.
“Second choice: You will be reincarnated in another world with all your memories intact, and I will grant you a power unique only to you, and it will help you fulfill the condition that comes with this choice.”
Curious, I ask her what the condition is.
“The condition?” A crooked smirk appeared on her face, turning her haughty tone into something vicious. “Conquer the world.”
My eyes widened in surprise, the weight of her words starting to add to my fear-turned-excitement.
“There is a prophecy in this world that if the reincarnation of Typhon–the cataclysmic world-ending being of the past–attains something of unimaginable power and influence, he will destroy the world.”
Filya speaks with complete urgency, “You must conquer the world to stop Typhon’s reincarnation from attaining such power because, at this point, no one in this world is showing promise to become the world’s strongest."
After a small pause, I asked her, "What do you mean?"
"The throne is empty and he can take it anytime.”
After she finished explaining, I was given some time to think about my decision.
A safe, fulfilled, and assured life? Or a dangerous life with a chance for absolute glory?
I could never pass up on this opportunity, I said to myself, and I thought I'd never hesitate. I can return back to the real world and be born to rich parents. I’d have tasty food to eat every day, get the games I want, and in the future, I’d die of old age with my life fully satisfied and fulfilled until the very end. While my life in provincial Japan was a bit bland and boring at times, it was a life I'd want to return back to.
But the concept of determinism disgusts me.
“Can you tell me more about which power you'll give me?” As soon as I asked her that, her lips curled into a smirk as if she already knew what my choice was.
“I can’t tell you which power because the World Administrator grants it to you. I'm simply the overseer of this world, I cannot decide things for you.”
“Then–”
“Ughh shut up!” Filya gritted her teeth at my continued barrage of questions. With one flick of a finger, I stood up on my two feet as she pushed me outside the door. “I’m giving you some traits to make your life in this world easier, on top of what you’ll receive.”
“Hey–” I tried to stop my legs from moving while she was pushing me, but I couldn’t. I should probably learn to stop resisting in the presence of this goddess. “I haven’t chosen yet!”
“But you’ve already made up your mind, right?” I could feel Filya using all of her body weight to push me towards the door, with her light grunts indicating her struggle. “Good luck-urgh, Otherworlder! May the Aether guide you among the river of stars.”
“H-hey, what does that mean?! Are you wishing for me to die again?”
“It’s a saying, dumbass!”
The door opened to a blindingly bright light, causing me to close my eyes. I could feel my body hover in the air, the strong gust of wind making it seem like I was flying. Wherever it will take me, I hope it wouldn't be somewhere dangerous.
The light seeping from my eyes significantly dimmed, and the cool breeze of the tropical, rural area that’s so familiar to me blew across me. Opening my eyes, I am greeted with a sight of a forest clearing and the chirping of the birds. I found myself still wearing the same black hoodie and gray pants from "heaven," or wherever I was reincarnated with the goddess, along with a pair of rubber slippers.
At the center of the clearing was a freshwater lake reflecting the afternoon sun. White ducks with yellow beaks are swimming gently above the lake–the kind that exists on Earth.
As I observed my surroundings, the thought that this was another world flew out of my mind. So far, there was nothing notable that separates this world from Earth.
I noticed a cold, slightly heavy weight of metal in my hoodie pocket. I pull it out to see a strange metallic plate with letters I haven’t seen before, but I could somehow read it. “Status Plate” is what it said.
The Status Plate glows blue for a quick moment before three holographic interfaces popped up from within it.
NAME: Luck LVL 10
Life Points LP : 110 Aether ATH: 110
Class: Dicemaster Equipped Weapon: Six-faced White Die
,,,
[Gift from the Goddess]
“By receiving the gift of the Goddess, you must not forget your true purpose in this world.”
10+ LVL UP↑
Class Set to Unique Class: Dicemaster
,,,
[Otherworlder’s Gift]
“Speak with goodness and greatness, for the vilest of words must be paid with your tongue.”
Granted the innate ability to communicate in Traevilyan.
,,,
[Dicemaster’s Covenant]
“Journey in isolation and hardship, Dicemaster. This is a covenant you made.”
Class Change is restricted.
Weapon Change is restricted.
Interclass Skill Sharing is restricted.
Portable storage class items are restricted.
LUCK is permanently set to -50.
When joining a party, your all party members' defense and attack is set to 0 until the party disbands.
All types of Evolution success rates are permanently set to 100%.
,,,
Message from Filya:
Item Attached: [Otherworlder’s Backpack]
"I made sure of granting you the trait to understand Traevilyan, Melsion's primary language! Aside from that, you'll find a guidebook on the fundamental aspects of Melsion. I wrote it myself, so be sure to follow everything there (* ^ ω ). There is also a weapon selector at the end of the guidebook once you read everything. Make sure not to lose it!"
,,,
WORLD ADMINISTRATOR
Because of [Dicemaster’s Covenant], the backpack from [Gift from the Goddess] has not been granted.
Lots of terms I don't know here. And my name in this world is Luck? Ironic, considering my luck stat was basically negative.
From what I can understand, my unique class, Dicemaster, doesn’t have too many special skills to begin with. “The power I get should give me an advantage when starting in this world,” said the goddess. And the backpack that should give me a guidebook and a weapon wasn't granted. What kind of fuckery is this world playing at? Not that it might be useful after all, since my passive skill [Gift of the Goddess] didn’t allow me to use any weapon. That said, how am I supposed to fight monsters with a die?
I put the Status Plate back into my pocket before attempting to test my only skill.
And... I don't know how to cast a skill yet. Do I press it while my interface is active? Do I cast it verbally? Hoping it's the latter, I verbally spoke the name of my skill, “Dice Roll.”
A formation of blue crystals suddenly accumulated at a single point above my palm. I hovered my hand below the blue crystals that looked like it was materializing something, all while doing so instinctively.
“This must be aether, then?” I presumed as I carefully observe the translucent crystals.
The aether above my hand slowly faded into the air as the die materializes fully. It starts to spin quickly before coming to a complete stop as soon as it landed on my palm. The number on the top of the die is... one.
[DICE ROLL: 1]
Unlucky... I muttered a curse under my breath before pocketing the Status Plate and retracting its holographic menu back into itself.
Suddenly, I heard a high-pitched clicking noise coming from the other side of the forest clearing. Emerging from the forest is a beetle that was nearly as big as a dog. It stared at me for a few seconds before it clicked once again--this time, it was more high pitched that it hurt my ears.
The clicking noise soon multiplied exponentially from the background of the forest, and as if that isn’t enough to knock me to my senses, the beetle charged toward me, along with probably its entire family emerging from the forest. Without a weapon or even a viable skill for protection, there was only one thing I could do in this situation.
I started to run as fast as I can into the forest, relying on the belief that I was faster than the beetles and that I'd find help along the way. While running, it didn’t take long for me to assume what my dice roll skill does.
“What the hell, Filya, this class is fucking shit!”
Hello, I'm TSR and this is my first post here! I mainly post on RoyalRoad, but I plan to upload all my chapters here in HFY in hopes of getting feedback about the story and criticism as well. I hope you enjoy it!
submitted by onebuddyforlife to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 06:04 plasTUSK Week 22 Introduction Thread: Street Food

This was a popular suggestion last year, so thank you to u/Hamfan, u/TeletextPear, u/GingersaurusRex, u/Espio1332, and u/BoredofTheInternet!
Whether you live in a large city or a small town, you've probably had a taste of street food. Street foods are convenient and cheap (well, sometimes), and sold by vendors outside of a restaurant. But that doesn't mean they're low quality! Some street food vendors have even earned Michelin stars.
Here are a few ideas to get you started:
And that's really just the tip of the iceberg. There are so many more street foods, so why don't you share your favorites in the comments?
submitted by plasTUSK to 52weeksofcooking [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 06:00 InfernoAA God Made the World in Six Days, I’ll Perfect New Japan's on the Seventh Part Four: Ring o' Roses

In Part Three, Shingo Takagi confronted both his duties as World Heavyweight Champion and member of Los Ingobernables de Japon, proceeding to right the wrongs of his first reign by winning the January 4 main event against Tetsuya Naito to squash their beef and become co-leaders. With PAC shockingly joining the group after having gone on a crusade against them, they seemed stronger than ever, all except for Shingo's neck. Feeling the weight of CHAOS crushing it, it took both Kazuchika Okada and Hiroshi Tanahashi to bring him to his knees, the Ace of the Universe back to his rightful spot after 5 years, restoring CHAOS’s purist regime. Ending off on keeping the riches from blood rival Katsuyori Shibata yet again, he now awaits the arrival of the 2024 New Japan Cup Winner...
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New Japan Cup Finals (March 28, 2024)
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“ZACK SABRE JR. HAS PAC IN HYPERNORMALISATION! PAC SUBMITS! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FOR THE THIRD TIME IN HISTORY OUR NEW JAPAN CUP WINNER IS ZSJ!” After two failed attempts to translate his cup success into gold, the Bone Master has another chance to fulfil his career’s greatest goal. And out walks the man he beat in the 2018 Finals for his first win, the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, Hiroshi Tanahashi! One of Zack’s biggest rivals since coming to Japan, and one that’s had his number more time than he’s had theirs, he must beat the godly Ace of the Universe if he wishes to claim his first piece of IWGP-commissioned singles gold!
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The stage set for Sakura Genesis, Sabre makes sure to rub in everyone’s faces the premonition he laid down at New Year’s Dash. He said to LIJ he’d be back for the title, and after beating one of their men, he’s made good on his claims. And now, he’s going to make ‘God’ bow to him, whether he wants to or not. When asked for his opinion on the challenger, Tanahashi says he’s amused by how earnestly the Windy Man’s tried to become a New Japan guy, moving his entire life to Japan in pursuit of the top prize. Whilst that dedication may be admirable, it’ll be for nought, Zack just another visitor to his grand kingdom, CHAOS remaining Sabre’s white whale at the end of every NJC journey.
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Sakura Genesis (April 7, 2024)
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Also on the show:
United Empire (Will Ospreay, Great-O-Khan, Aaron Henare) (c) vs Just6Guys (SANADA, Taichi, Ryohei Oiwa) - NEVER Openweight 6-Man Tag Team Championship
YOH (c) vs El Desperado - IWGP Junior Tag Team Championship
TMDK (c) vs Bishamon - IWGP Tag Team Championship
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Hiroshi Tanahashi (c) vs Zack Sabre Jr. XI - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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They say third time’s the charm, but that remains to be seen in Sabre’s case. Sabre-Gun with mixed successes throughout the night, El Desperado coming up short whilst TMDK kept their gold, it’s up to their leader to set an example for his group. Popping his collar, he steels his gaze on the championship as Tanahashi makes his entrance, Zack blocking out the surrounding world. Despite channelling the controversial words of the polarising Okada for the past year, Hiroshi still has Ryogoku in the palm of his hands, remaining the people’s favourite no matter the shade of grey he envelops himself in. Back to his pomp and circumstance, he gives ZSJ the full show of what a true star looks like, ready to bring Sabre back down to reality.
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It's a methodical opening from the two talented grapplers, Tanahashi standing toe-to-toe with the best technical wrestler in the world with merely his sheer aura. Sabre shoots for an early Article 50, but Tana sidesteps him into the ropes, before condescendingly patting him on the cheek! Zack retaliates with a forearm, knocking Tana to the mat, a deluge of stomps raining down on his face as the Hiroshi tries to cover up!
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Escaping to the ropes, Sabre charges at him with a EUROPEAN UPPERCUT! Tana evades, connecting a DRAGON-STYLE HARITE, slapping respect into the challenger! Incensed, Sabre leaves a mark with a stinging slap of his own, before nailing a chain of Uppercuts! Tana fights back for a TWIST AND SHOUT, though Sabre counters with a FLATLINER! A High-Angle German is stuffed, Zack decked with an ALL OUT and a MIDDLE-ROPE SENTON BOMB! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT!
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Tana guns for the leg like he did Shibata, but a Feint Roundhouse into a Legsweep from ZSJ floors him! AND A NECK TWIST!!! With Hiroshi distracted by his neck, Sabre immediately switches for the legs, applying SUNDAY RAIL ENGINEERING WORKS REPLACEMENT BUS SERVICE!!! Tana’s quick to make the ropes, though has to physically pull himself to the apron when Sabre doesn’t release! No breather for him, Zack hooks his leg in the ropes and connects a DRAGON SCREW!
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Tana receiving a taste of his own medicine, Sabre slides out and scores one directly on the apron, bashing Hiroshi’s leg into the hardest part of the ring! He attempts to Irish Whip Tanahashi into the ring post, but the Once in a Century Talent nails a SLING BLADE ON THE APRON! DRAGON SUPLEX TO THE FLOOR!!! Playing the starpower card, Tana poses with a grin as the cameras catch a shot of Sabre beneath him. He doesn’t notice Zack’s little twitches though, committing to a HIGH FLY FLOW TO THE OUTSIDE!!! A POSSUM SABRE PUSHES HIM MID-AIR ONTO THE BARRICADE!!!
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As Tokyo gasps, it’s academic from Sabre as he threads Tana’s leg through a steel chair, PILMANISING IT!!! Evidence long discarded by the time the referee walks over, he wraps Hiroshi’s leg around the steel post, using it to apply a SASORI-GATAME!!! Tana lets out shouts of agony, Zack milking the suffering as Hiroshi begs the referee to get the challenger to stop. Eventually letting go, he forces Tanahashi to walk himself back into the spider’s web, a SPRINGBOARD ENZUIGIRI awaiting! BRIDGING NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT!
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Swivelling into a KNEEBAR now, he rolls around with Tana’s leg in his grasp, countering Hiroshi’s each attempts at escape, before going for the SELECTED TECHNICAL WORKS VOL. 2 combination, but Tana stacks his shoulders up! ONE! TWO! THR-NO LUCK! Forced to release to kick out, he scrambles to his feet to batter Hiroshi with a elbows, a DISCUS ELBOW SMASH staggering him, but a Pele Kick is caught, Tana nailing his own DRAGON SCREW!!!
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A TWIST AND SHOUT follows, before Tana wraps on the DRAGON SWING! Wrenching on the neck, he makes a good few rotations before suddenly dropping to a knee, his leg unable to hold up for too long. Going for a DRAGON SUPLEX, it’s blocked by a barrage of back elbows, though Hiroshi nails the DARUMA-SHIKI GERMAN INSTEAD!!! ONE! TWO! THR-SABRE KICKS OUT! Nursing his neck, Sabre gets no reprieve as a HASE URANAGE spikes him, and a HIGH FLY ATTACK… IS CAUGHT IN AN ANKLE LOCK!!!
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Tana rolls through but Sabre rolls with him, though he can’t get the grapevine, Tana booting him off with the other leg! TWIST AND SHOUT! Sabre subdued, a SLING BLADE takes him down, a HIGH FLY FLOW FOLLOWING SUIT!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Tana rushes for a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF, putting the hurt on Zack’s legs now! The Submission Master searches for escapes yet Hiroshi commits his everything to this move, not letting him free for the life of him! That is, until his own leg gives way! Grounded, he can’t stop a PENALTY KICK!!! AND A ZACK DRIVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-TANA STAYS ALIVE!!!
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Ragdolling Hiroshi with a pair of Double Underhook Suplexes, Zack puts Tana in a prone position to stomp the insides of the knees, before applying a CALF SLICER!!! Yet again, the Ace of the Universe is in trouble, his condition deteriorating with each submission. Knowing he needs to change that and fast… HE GRABS ZACK’S SKULL AND RAMS IT INTO THE MAT REPEATEDLY TO BREAK!!! Gears turning in his mind from Sabre’s tribute, HE GETS HIM UP FOR A STYLES CLASH!!! ONE! TWO! THR-SABRE SURVIVES!!!
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Connecting a SLING BLADE, he dumps Zack with a DRAGON SUPLEX! ZACK RESPONDS WITH ONE OF HIS OWN! Open palm strikes from Tana light up Zack, only for him to wring out the arm for a PELE KICK!!! Sabre teases a Legsweep, but Hiroshi hops over this time and nails a GROUNDED HIGH FLY FLOW!!! Air driven out of ZSJ’s lungs, Tana hoists him up… AND NAILS A TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!!! SHADES OF OKADA!!! The CHAOS Leader beating him like this both past Sakura Geneses, it’s going to happen again!
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Scaling the ropes, Tana crashes down with a HIGH FLY FLOWWWWWWWWWW!!! But he’s not done! Wanting to make an example out of Sabre, he takes his time posing atop the world like the star he is… BUT IT ALLOWS ZACK TO RECOVER, GRABBING HIS LEG!!! Hammering the knee before Tana has a chance to respond, he yanks him off… RUNNING LIGER BOMB!!! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT!!! STRAIGHT INTO CLARKY CAT BAD BALLOON REMIX!!! Folding Tana’s leg over his shoulder, he utterly destroys the geriatric knees over the champion, who wails in agony, doing anything he can to break free… BUT HE’S TOO FAR FROM THE ROPES!!! TANAHASHI TAPS OUT!!! THIRD TIME’S THE CHARM – ZSJ’S THE NEW KING OF NEW JAPAN!!!
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Zack Sabre Jr. def. Hiroshi Tanahashi (c) to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (30:23)
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Cutting Tanahashi’s reign brutally short, Sabre-Gun has claimed its spot on the throne! Raising up both his trophy and championship, he’s lifted onto TMDK’s shoulders, the three men flaunting their gold to the world as the remainder of the stable joins them! Tana shell-shocked, he hangs his head in shame and despair as he limps off, Ryogoku the first of many dark days for NJPW…
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As the new monarch, Sabre’s first order of business is simple – kill off his counterpart. And by that he means the man who successfully defended the title against him last year, Will Ospreay. Though he may hold the title, jealousy courses through ZSJ’s veins knowing the Commonwealth Kingpin’s considered the company’s top gaijin despite Zack’s superior record over him. Wanting to change that, he calls out Ospreay, who’s fresh off dropping the NEVER 6-Man Titles to Just6Guys, having had quite the identity crisis since having the WK main event taken from him. Eager at the chance at a do-over, he accepts without hesitation.
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Wrestling Hinokuni (April 27, 2024)
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Sabre-Gun (Zack Sabre Jr. & TMDK) vs United Empire (Will Ospreay & Aussie Open)
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Whilst Sabre and Ospreay have kept their distance since their Royal Quest match, the same can’t be said about the greater stables. World Tag League Winners TMDK taking Aussie Open’s IWGP Tag Team Championship at Wrestle Kingdom and United Empire successfully defending the NEVER Titles against Sabre-Gun at the Anniversary Show, this conclusion was only inevitable. Aussie Open also wanting a chance to get their titles back, they team with Ospreay here against the champion unit, the Commonwealth Nations going to war for supremacy.
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Unlike Royal Quest, Sabre’s notably a lot surer of himself against Will here, no longer compensating by matching his striking game, rather trying to make Ospreay play his game instead. However, even with Zack being in his best possible form, SG falters against UE once more, the Coriolis to Mikey Nicholls setting the stage for Wrestling Dontaku! Zack grits his teeth as much like Tanahashi, Ospreay looks down on him.
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United Empire def. Sabre-Gun (17:34)
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Wrestling Dontaku (May 4, 2024)
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Also on the show:
Ren Narita (c) vs Shota Umino - NEVER Openweight Championship
Taichi (c) vs Hiromu Takahashi - NJPW World Television Championship
YOH (c) vs Robbie Eagles - IWGP Junior Tag Team Championship
KENTA (c) vs PAC - IWGP United States Championship
TMDK (c) vs Aussie Open - IWGP Tag Team Championship
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Zack Sabre Jr. (c) vs Will Ospreay XVII - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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A rivalry extending back an entire decade to the UK Indies, the spot for best British wrestler in the world has long been contested between these two. Back at it again, it’s time they settle the score once more. Ospreay strides out comfortably, having been in this position plenty of times by now as a potentially soon-to-be 3x World Champion, this his domain. As for Sabre, it’s his first time defending a title of this magnitude, pressure clearly weighing on his shoulders, but taking a deep breath, he prepares himself for victory just like TMDK earlier in the night.
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As the bell rings… Ospreay explodes for a DROPKICK right away – shades of NJC 2021! Zack fishes the leg out the air and applies an ANKLE LOCK, LOOKING TO TAP HIM OUT WITHIN THE FIRST FEW SECONDS OF THE MATCH! Alarmed, Ospreay thrashes with kicks from his free leg to force Sabre off, rolling to the outside to recollect himself! Sabre doesn’t let him though, nailing a Baseball Slide Dropkick, before tossing him back in and wrangling the leg again!
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A roll shakes him off, a HOOK KICK following, AND AN OSCUTTER! Sabre stops it though, countering with a SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! Will rotates through to his feet and soars for a STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS, but again Zack dodges! BOW & ARROW ATTEMPT! Will flips into a cover, Zack kicking out instantly! Ospreay handsprings off the ropes, teasing his signature Enzuigiri, Sabre grasping the leg mid-air, but another follows, wrapping around his neck to twist through into a CROSS ARMBREAKER FROM WILL!
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Sabre gets the monkey grip, preventing full extension, BUT WILL BITES THE FINGERS TO FORCE HIM OFF, now getting the full stretch, yelling at the referee to ask Zack if he submits! Sabre refuses however, rolling onto his stomach to turn the hold over and stand up, getting his legs around Will’s neck to score a NECK TWIST, getting him to release!
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Zack knowing it to be a sore spot, he gets rallying with European Uppercuts to rock it like a bobblehead, before leaping into a GUILLOTINE CHOKE! Zack tightens his grip around Will’s neck, but a BUCKLE EXPLODER SUPLEX loosens it again as Sabre’s left dangling in a Tree of Woe! Ospreay sits cross-legged in front of him and SMASHES HIS NOSE WITH FOREARMS, busting a defenceless Zack open! Fish-hooking the nose, Will shakes his head about and lets crimson droplets paint the surroundings like a psychopathic Bob Ross, before letting go, cackling.
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He heads to the top rope, but Zack meets him there, pulling himself up using his core strength and crotching Will on the neighbouring rope! The two face-to-face again, Zack sitting on the turnbuckle and Will on the rope, they trade forearms, blood continuing to leak down Sabre’s face, but he doesn’t care, INSTEAD GRABBING WILL’S LEG TO SUSPEND HIM UPSIDE-DOWN WITH A HANGING SUNDAY RAIL ENGINEERING WORKS REPLACEMENT BUS SERVICE!!!
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Will’s in sheer agony as Sabre contorts his limb, but he’s saved by the referee’s count, Sabre forced to let go, Ospreay slumping to the apron. Zack turns to face the apron as he collects his wits and catches his breath, whilst Will nurses his leg, being checked on by the referee to make sure he’s good to continue, hopping to his base. Sabre settles down on the apron behind Will, grabbing him from behind, TESTING AN APRON TIGER SUPLEX!
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Ospreay smashes the nose with a rear headbutt to ward him off! AND HE SPRINGS OFF ONE LEG TO DROP SABRE WITH AN APRON OSCUTTER, BOTH MEN SPILLING TO THE FLOOR!!! The referee starts their count as both lay still, no sign of movement as the 10 count nears. Reaching 12 now, they finally begin to stir, getting on all fours… 13… 14… 15… OSPREAY’S LEG GIVES OUT! 16… 17… 18… BOTH MEN MAKE ONE LAST PUSH, SABRE SHOVING HIMSELF INSIDE THE RING BY 19, WHILST OSPREAY PULLS HIMSELF UP ONTO THE APRON AND SPRINGS OFF ONE LEG ON THE ROPES FOR A PIP PIP CHEERIO!!! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT!!!
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Coming down hard on the leg though, Ospreay writhes in pain, but with Zack down, he pulls himself up with every last bit of energy he has up for STORM BREAKER… ZACK WITH AN OCTOPUS HOLD!!! Will immediately rams him into the turnbuckle until he lets up, Sabre instead sliding down his back like a bird hitting a window, OSPREAY COLLECTING HIM TO NAIL A HITODENASHI DRIVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOO!!!
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Will shouts in frustration, having jammed the leg on the landing. Feeling victory nigh though, he preps the HIDDEN BLADE!!! SABRE SPINS AROUND AND COUNTERS WITH A ZACK DRIVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NO DICE!!! PENTALTY KICK! ANOTHER COVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-STILL NO LUCK!!! NOW A NUMERO DOS A LA DESPERADO!!! Ospreay screams as Sabre tears the leg in half, Will dancing around in search of reprieve, until a FRANKENSTEINER stands ZSJ on his dome! BRAINBUSTER FOLLOWS!
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Sabre rocked, Ospreay cracks the CHELSEA GRIN against his neck, before connecting the HIDDEN BLADE!!! ONE! TWO! THR-ZACK’S STILL IN IT!!! Will’s leg is falling apart as he stumbles back into the corner to try for seconds, losing balance and collapsing before he can reach his target! EUROPEAN CLUTCH FROM ZACK!!! ONE! TWO! THR-OSPREAY SURVIVES!!! BUT A PENALTY KICK TO THE SKULL! AND STRAIGHT INTO ORIENTEERING WITH NAPALM DEATH!!! OSPREAY THRASHES LIKE A MADMAN, FEELING HIS LIGAMENTS ON THE VERGE OF TEARING… AND HE TAPS!!!
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Zack Sabre Jr. (c) def. Will Ospreay to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (34:18)
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One more for the bad guys. Commonwealth Kingpin at his mercy, Ospreay a mess as he scrambles off, Zack’s the new Top Gaijin in town. Raising his title high from the turnbuckles, he juices every last drop out his victory, this moment perfect to him… or not. OH MY GOD IT’S MINORU SUZUKI!!! Any bit of colour that remains on ZSJ’s pale face drains off as the King’s music rings through Fukuoka, but there’s no sign of the man- WAIT, SABRE’S SPUN AROUND! KICK TO THE GUT – GOTCH-STYLE PILEDRIVER!!! HE’S HERE!!! Placing a boot on Zack’s chest, Suzuki holds the World Title high over his former stablemate’s body!
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The ending of Dontaku has Japan buzzing as they question the true motive of Suzuki’s attack, and after an extended silence, the King sets the record straight. 1 ½ years ago, Suzuki-Gun was dissolved, and ever since, Sabre’s been writing checks with his mouth that he can’t cash. He walks around with the World Title like he’s the reason he even received recognition in NJPW in the first place. Suzuki gave him a home beside him, and as rapidly as he elevated Sabre, he can take it all away from him just as fast. He’s getting old and is still missing the final piece to the Japanese Triple Crown, so he plans to take that from Zack.
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Sabre doesn’t take too kindly to these words, letting his actions speak for himself as he ASSAULTS SUZUKI on a Road To Dontaku show! Bringing Sabre-Gun with him, they brutalise the legend, before Zack plants his group’s flag on Suzuki’s chest! Mocking him for having no allies the next night, declaring Suzuki’s era of relevance to be long gone… this plays. SUZUKI’S HERE, AND HE’S NOT ALONE! IT’S JUST6GUYS!!! Racing to the ring, the two factions erupt in a massive brawl, bodies flying left and right! Sabre tries for a quick getaway but he’s stopped by Minoru, who gives him a devilish snarl before clobbering him with forearms until Sabre-Gun’s sent packing through the crowd, Zack yelling expletives at Suzuki as he retreats!
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Back to Yokohama Arena (May 16, 2024)
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Sabre-Gun (Zack Sabre Jr., El Desperado & TMDK) vs Minoru Suzuki & Just3Guys (Taichi, Yoshinobu Kanemaru, DOUKI)
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With Sabre-Gun and Just6Guys feuding ever since their respective formations, switching between silent competitive warfare of racking up belts to fighting each other, notably the Sabre/Taichi saga, it all fully comes to a head in Suzuki’s home of Yokohama! With full freedom to destroy each other however they please, the two factions don’t hold back one bit, with Suzuki especially targeting ZSJ. He’s unable to give him grief the way he wishes to though, Zack tactfully hiding behind his partners until he can blindside Minoru, before scramming again. Ultimately, it’s Minoru putting Desperado away with the GOTCH PILEDRIVER, before signalling to Sabre that time’s running out for him, Suzuki to get his hands on him too soon enough!
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Minoru Suzuki & J6G def. Sabre-Gun (15:03)
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As much as Sabre tries to deny it, that day only speeds closer with each accusation of cowardice against the prideful champion’s name, the world questioning whether he’s afraid of Suzuki. Adamant to silence his doubters, he finally accepts Suzuki’s title challenge, setting the stage for Dominion, though promising he won’t have a career to go back to when Sabre’s done with him!
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Dominion 6.2 (June 2, 2024)
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Also on the show:
YOH (c) vs SHO - IWGP Junior Heavyweight Championship
Just2Guys (c) vs Sabre-Gun (Blake Christian & Clark Connors) - IWGP Junior Tag Team Championship
TMDK (c) vs The Lucha Brothers - IWGP Tag Team Championship
PAC (c) vs Katsuyori Shibata - IWGP United States Championship
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Zack Sabre Jr. (c) vs Minoru Suzuki - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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With Sabre-Gun beating Just6Guys earlier in the night, this war’s already at its boiling point by the time the main event arrives, Suzuki opting to enter second as Zack steps out- CRACK! STEEL CHAIR TO SABRE’S SPINE!!! Suzuki isn’t wasting even a second here, tearing the jacket off Sabre’s back before bending the steel over his spine! The Windy Man desperately tries to crawl away to the ring, but Suzuki steps on his ankle to stop him! Turning him around to meet his maker, MINORU GOES FOR A GOTCH PILEDRIVER ON THE CHAIR!!! LOW BLOW FROM SABRE TO COUNTER!!!
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Suzuki drops to his knees as Osaka boos the smarmy champion, ZSJ now battering the King’s back, before finally sliding him in to get the match started! PENALTY KICK RIGHT AWAY!!! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT!!! Sabre wrenches in a CLARKY CAT, working the arm as Suzuki writhes under him, but it’s not long before Minoru stands up out of it, hurling ZSJ to the mat! Booting him in the jaw, Suzuki backs him into the corner and tears into him with open palm strikes! He winds up a CORNER DROPKICK, but Sabre evades, blasting him with a rapid barrage of European Uppercuts against the turnbuckle!
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Zack taking the run-up now, Suzuki bucks him over the ropes to the apron, SABRE BLASTING A THUMB IN HIS EYE! Minoru blinded, Zack leaps up for a SPRINGBOARD ENZUIGIRI- SUZUKI BLOCKS WITH A WILD SLAP TO THE CHEEK!!! Sabre stiffed, Suzuki applies a HANGING JUJI-GATAME FROM THE ROPES!!! Zack screams in agony as Minoru damn near rips his arm out the socket, the referee’s count the only thing keeping him from going!
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Releasing, Sabre crumples to the floor, getting as far as he possibly can from Suzuki, though he’s not fast enough, Suzuki nailing a GOAL KICK to his skull from the apron! Grabbing Sabre, he HURLS him into the guardrail with it shoulder-first, the velocity sending Zack through! As he goes to collect his prey though, SABRE TOSSES A CHAIR AT HIS SKULL!!! Threading Suzuki’s arm through it, SABRE STOMPS THE ELBOW!!! AND AN ARTICLE 50!!!
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Sabre abuses the legend, but he forgets about the other arm, Suzuki slapping his head in with it until Zack releases! Shaking off the arm, a BACK BODY DROP sends Sabre crashing back to ringside, Minoru following after him as ZSJ slinks inside the ring. Zack beats him to his feet though, stomping a hole through the mat with Suzuki’s skull, dribbling it! He cracks a ROLLING ELBOW off the skull, but Minoru walks through it, glaring at Sabre! Throwing an elbow of his own, it gets caught, Zack scoring the PELE KICK to the arm!
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AND A KIMURA LOCK!!! Sabre brutally rips at the arm, bringing Suzuki to his knees from the pain even, but Minoru pins his shoulders to the mat! ONE! TWO! THR-SABRE RELEASES TO KICK OUT! As Zack rolls to his feet, a SHOTGUN DROPKICK awaits him! Suzuki clobbers him with slaps to the face, Sabre seeing stars as one knocks him clean off his feet! Turning to the turnbuckle… SUZUKI RIPS IT OFF!!! Steel exposed, he teases a SNAP SUPLEX INTO THE CORNER!!! SABRE COUNTERS WITH A BRAINBUSTER ON THE MAT!!! GUILLOTINE CHOKE!!!
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Draining the life out of Suzuki, Sabre presses on the carotid artery, Minoru is deep trouble! BUT NOW THE KING BITES ON ZSJ’S FINGERS!!! Zack yelps and releases, allowing Suzuki to secure his wrists and STOMP HIS HEAD IN!!! Sabre catches a boot and applies SUNDAY RAIL ENGINEERING WORKS REPLACEMENT BUS SERVICE!!! ZSJ tortures Suzuki’s leg, though in doing so leaves his arm exposed, Minoru yanking off his grip and countering into HIS OWN HEEL HOOK!!!
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Sabre desperately tries the same counter, but Suzuki’s grip is too tight to break, forcing Zack to roll to the ropes! SUZUKI ISN’T LETTING GO! Crawling on his hands, Sabre pulls himself to the floor and WHIPLASHES MINORU’S NECK OFF THE BOTTOM ROPE!!! Staggering about ringside on one foot, he grabs his title and rolls back in! Suzuki struggling up, Sabre tries to deck him with the belt… but the referee grabs it from behind! A tug-of-war ends in SUZUKI KNOCKING THE BELT INTO THE REF WITH AN ENZUIGIRI!
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Both men hitting the deck, Minoru rocks ZSJ with a Dropkick! GOTCH PILEDRIVER ONTO THE TITLE!!! But there’s no one to count! Pissed, Suzuki limps out and abuses a couple young lions, before picking one out the crowd to toss in the ring, ripping the referee’s shirt off and telling the lion to put it on! SUZUKI COVERS! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Even more livid, HE DECKS THIS LION TOO! Turning back to Zack, he notices the champion feebly reaching for the belt! Kicking it out the ring, Suzuki goes for another GOTCH PILEDRIVER!!! BACK BODY DROP COUNTER!!!
​
Still hurting, Sabre struggles to get a rally of strikes going, Suzuki meeting him blow for blow! BUT SABRE WHIPS THE SHOULDER INTO THE MAT! Minoru stunned, sadistic thoughts run through Sabre’s mind… TIGER SUPLEX INTO THE EXPOSED STEEL!!! AND A RUNNING LIGER BOMB – ONE OF SUZUKI’S RIVALS MOVES!!! THE REFEREE’S BACK TO CONSCIOUSNESS! NOT LIKE THIS! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
​
Sabre’s exasperated, thinking he had it! Running out of options, he teases a ZACK DRIVER, but Suzuki slips behind and applies the SLEEPER HOLD!!! Sabre’s quickly fading, frantically trying to tear the bad arm off, but Minoru doesn’t budge, shoving ZSJ to the mat for the PENALTY KICK!!! ONE! TWO! THR-ZACK KICKS OUT!!! Suzuki grabs Sabre by the chin, demanding him to strike Minoru if he thinks he’s so tough, ZSJ doing his best, but Suzuki eats it and returns a HARD SLAP! SLEEPER SUPLEX!!!
​
Tossing Sabre to the apron, Minoru steps onto the middle rope and cinches in an ELEVATED SLEEPER!!! Zack dangles in the air, unable to find his footing to escape, Suzuki lifting him higher and higher! Blood rushing to his legs, he needs to act fast, attacking the elbow again until the hold is finally slightly loosened! Leaning forwards, he pulls Suzuki his direction, allowing him to lower his feet onto the apron… YANKING SUZUKI INTO AN APRON ZACK DRIVER!!!
​
Sabre coughs up a lung as he kicks Minoru’s corpse back in, before lining up a PENALTY KICK!!! ONE! TWO! THR-SUZUKI’S ALIVE!!! Zack’s stunned as he comes face-to-face with Suzuki’s sneer, Minoru still having enough in him to throw slaps! Sabre returning Uppercuts, they go blow-for-blow until Zack collapses first, though he’s playing possum, HEADBUTTING THE SHOULDER as the King tries to grab him! He goes for YOU CAN’T PLAY CONKERS IN ENGLAND, though he’s immediately tossed down, SUZUKI NAILING A PENALTY KICK!!!
​
Winding up, Minoru goes for one more… ZACK SLAPS HIS HEAD OFF HIS SHOULDERS!!! Putting the head between his legs, HE NAILS A GOTCH PILEDRIVER!!! Suzuki collapses in position for a PENALTY KICK!!! AND NOW SABRE CINCHES IT IN – HURRAH! ANOTHER YEAR, SURELY THIS ONE WILL BE BETTER THAN THE LAST; THE INEXORABLE MARCH OF PROGRESS WILL LEAD US ALL TO HAPPINESS!!! Suzuki grits his teeth, trying to fight through it, Sabre keeping his eyes on his hands to see the tap… NOWHERE TO GO, MINORU FLIPS HIM OFF WITH BOTH HANDS AND VERBALLY SUBMITS!!!
​
Zack Sabre Jr. (c) def. Minoru Suzuki to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (32:50)
​
Surviving one of the toughest matches of his career, Zack’s kingdom still lives, though barely. As he’s handed his title though, he chucks it aside, this about far more than the gold to him! SABRE STOMPS OUT SUZUKI!!! Signalling to the back, out rush Sabre-Gun, coming to Sabre’s aid to conduct a mugging on the legend! SUDDEN DEATH FROM ELP! PINCHE LOCO FROM DESPERADO! THUNDER VALLEY FROM TMDK! TANDEM JEEP FLIP/DROPKICK FROM BLAKE, CONNORS AND FUJITA! And now, it's Zack’s turn. Dragging him to the concrete… HE’S GOING FOR THE GOTCH PILEDRIVER!!! HE WANTS TO RETIRE SUZUKI FOR GOOD!!!
​
BUT HERE COMES J6G!!! AND LANCE ARCHER TOO!!! Sabre tosses Suzuki aside to deal with the oncoming traffic, Taichi and co. putting up an honourable fight, but they’re still down a man, Sabre-Gun managing to retain their upper-hand, until… OH MY GOD, IT’S SUZUKI’S OLD TAG PARTNER NAOMICHI MARUFUJI!!! Sabre can’t even get a curse out before a KO-OH SMACKS HIM IN THE FACE!!! Marufuji beats on Zack to turn the tide, going for the POLE SHIFT, but Sabre manages to escape in the nick of time, Sabre-Gun once again sent on the retreat, the show closing on Marufuji helping Suzuki up!
​
​
NJPW/AJPW/NOAH All Together Again (June 7, 2024)
​
Zack Sabre Jr. vs Naomichi Marufuji
​
After the events of Dominion, it’s only natural these two fight, long, long overdue a one-on-one since their NOAH days together! Fighting in Suzuki’s honour, Marufuji steps to the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion and it’s like 2016 all over again the way he utterly humbles Sabre to start like he’s facing Okada! A match of two halves, it goes from Naomichi giving ZSJ the biggest whooping of his life to Sabre brutally breaking down the legend, reminding him he’s 8 years too old to still be winning these sorts of matches. Though Maru gives Zack grief one more than one occasion, he meets his demise at the hands of a CREMATION LILY, Sabre spitting on Naomichi as he leaves, declaring himself untouchable!
​
Zack Sabre Jr. def. Naomichi Marufuji (25:37)
​
​
With his war on J6G and friends officially behind him, Sabre sets his sights on a show he has quite some history with. Losing to Claudio Castagnoli at the first Forbidden Door, before beating Katsuyori Shibata at the second to take both the NJPW TV and ROH Pure Titles to ALL IN to submit Danielson, there’s naturally only one direction for him to head…
​
​
Dynamite (June 12, 2024)
​
Racking another AEW International Championship defence under his belt, Wheeler YUTA is on top of the world, and as he’s approached by Tony Schiavone for a post-match comment… WHACK! IWGP WORLD TITLE TO THE BACK OF HIS HEAD!!! SABRE-GUN’S HERE!!! Mugging Blackpool Combat Club’s young gun like they did Suzuki, a SABRE DRIVER leaves him broken on the mat as Zack yells down the camera that he wants Moxley’s head at Forbidden Door, scurrying away before BCC can make the save!
​
​
Collision (June 15, 2024)
​
Zack Sabre Jr. vs Wheeler YUTA
​
Off the back of Sabre’s assault on YUTA, a match is made between the two technically-gifted champions in a massive Collision main event! Though ZSJ’s far out his paygrade, an arrogant Wheeler does his best to knock off the Technical Wizard, impressing with a display of submissions he’s picked up from Danielson, before employing some of Claudio’s marquee athleticism and Mox’s grittiness. Never a fair match to begin with though, a TESCO MEAL DEAL cruelly silences YUTA!
​
Zack Sabre Jr. def. Wheeler YUTA (10:12)
​
Grabbing a mic, Zack runs down Moxley, reminding him how they were supposed to fight 4 years ago until the pandemic ruined that, Jon ducking him ever since. Now though, he’s the last member of BCC he needs to get through before he can shut up those babies too, so all he needs to know is if Jon is still afraid of him or not. And as Sabre awaits his response… HE RECEIVES IT IN THE FORM OF A PARADIGM SHIFT!!! Mox holds Zack’s title over his body, gaining some retribution for YUTA!
​
​
AEWxNJPW Forbidden Door (June 23, 2024)
​
Also on the show:
The Lucha Brothers (c) vs La Faccion Ingobernable (RUSH & Dralistico) - IWGP Tag Team Championship
PAC (c) vs Swerve Strickland - IWGP United States Championship
Tetsuya Naito vs Andrade El Idolo
​
Zack Sabre Jr. (c) vs Jon Moxley - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
​
The final showdown of a lengthy saga, Sabre makes his third defence against New Japan’s Ace, and it’s quite literally a bloody clinic, Mox showing zero fear in the face of the Top Gaijin, who looks to plant his flag over another territory. From a Paradigm Shift to the floor to a Zack Driver through a table, both men are busted open by the surroundings, the blood loss only helping Sabre’s case when he locks in the HYPERNORMALISATION, causing Mox to pass out! Alas, ZSJ stands atop BCC, but perhaps a more personal challenge yet awaits him…
​
Zack Sabre Jr. (c) def. Jon Moxley to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (23:20)
submitted by InfernoAA to FantasyBookingElite [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 05:59 onebuddyforlife Post Draft

I rested my chin on the palm of my hand, overlooking the serene, green scenery of the rice fields outside of my classroom. The mountains stood tall and unmoving from afar, dividing the clouds that pass through its summit. I sigh in relaxation, appreciating the peaceful surroundings that one cannot find in the cities.
I snapped out of my quiet trance as a small truck carrying hay passed by the road, and I once again noticed the faint yet consistent mashes of buttons coming from my only friend in the province. Since our teacher announced that she had to leave class early, leaving us in class for the rest of our last period today, my friend over to my right has been playing the newly released game nonstop. The new MMORPG game, Alterra.
My blonde-haired friend Hirato was playing on a portable gaming console. His back has been arched towards the console for the past 15 minutes, his eyes are practically glued to the console’s screen. I inched my seat toward him to take a closer look. He was trying to defeat a monster resembling a three-headed snake—a Hydra. His character’s health was one hit away from hitting zero, but the Hydra was practically undamaged.
“Hey, Hirato,” I called him. “How long are you going to play that game?”
“Awww, I died!” He says exasperatedly, leaning back on his chair in annoyance. “I’ve been trying to beat this boss since yesterday and there’s no luck at all! I even have my gear maxed out for this level, and still...”
Hirato continued speaking as he packed his console into his backpack, “I wouldn’t have any problem at all had you continued playing video games with me. You could help me beat the boss, you know."
Then, Hirato started to make some "drama" in a weird, playful manner. "Come on, Naruki! We were best buddies since we were kids! Whatever must have happened between us, my best friend?” The bell rings across the school building, indicating the end of classes for the day. At the same time, I made a disgusted look at him after saying something corny that must have come from some TV show.
“Stop it with that little skit of yours. We are still best buddies, but I’ve grown up from playing games. Remember, we’re going to college next year and I’ve been preparing for it ever since.” I grabbed my bag from beneath my seat, and just as I stood up, the wooden plank I stood on creaked.
"That's not true, and there's no way you'll pass up on an MMORPG like Alterra! There's no way you stopped playing just for college." Hirato claimed, but he quickly switched into a pondering tone. “Though you made me think about college. You want to go to Tokyo University from what I recall, but I thought you were tired of the city because it’s too crowded there?” He asked.
“It’ll give me a greater chance to get hired for a job with a high salary. My dad also said that it takes some time to get used to the city when I’ve been living all my life in the rice fields.” I ignored Hirato's first statement--but it's true. There's no way I can quit gaming, so I lied to him about it, but I also don't want to take precious time off when I'm studying for a test that will literally decide my future.
“You’re already thinking of your future far ahead.”
“Well, do you want to stay in this school?”
As I took another step towards the door, the wood plank creaked again, filling the short silence in Hirato’s pause.
“...You make a point.” He uttered in agreement.
My school was a single-story building with multiple rooms, occupied by a few students in different grades. To add, we were also the only third-year high school students in the school. Everything here is made of thin wood and paper, and the wooden flooring creaked ever so often that if we step on it the wrong way, it might literally collapse the floor. This building was so old that I’d be having a family reunion with the souls of my family from five generations ago every school day.
The cool breeze of the late afternoon blew toward us as we made our way to the paved dirt road.
"By the way, Hirato."
"Hm?"
"I lied. I'm actually playing Alterra. Since it released."
"Wha-- Then why won't you play co-op with me?!" Hirato was almost screaming in my face, taken aback by my lie.
"Because you're stupid. Why would you cast "Damage Reflect" on Hydra's one-turn kill when you're barely alive? Plus, it won't even damage the Hydra because the game recognizes the reflected damage as an effect, and the boss is immune to any effect."
"Urgh... Watch me beat that Hydra tomorrow, you'll regret not playing with me!"
"Do your best, Hirato. See you tomorrow," I sarcastically said to him as I watched my best friend run to his home, probably excited to try out what I just said. After all, I'm way past his level, so I can't even play with him without ruining his casual experience. It's time to go home for me as well, but the next bus stop is an hour from now. Maybe I'll play for a bit while waiting.
It was the scent of fresh air and the quiet atmosphere that separates urban life from rural life. Most people prefer convenience, while the minority prefer peacefulness. I'm part of the latter, but I still want to get a job in the city. Even if I'm still unsure what I wanted to be in the future.
“Hey, you brat!” A faint, old man’s voice screamed from the rice fields beside the paved road. “Watch out, the ground is dangerous there! Didn’t you see the sign?!”
My thoughts were cut off as I heard him shout at me with great urgency. After my eyes dart to the old man, I abruptly turn to see that there was a sign on the side of the road on both sides that said [ENTRY CLOSED]. Why wasn’t there any blockage? But it was my fault for not paying close attention to my surroundings.
“I’m sorry, mister. I didn’t see it earlier.” I apologized in a nonchalant manner, mostly because I still didn't realize the gravity of the situation at this time.
“Let go of your bag. Climb over the fence towards me. Now,” says the man.
While I didn’t know what could be so dangerous about this road that warrants an urgent reaction, I trusted him. But before I could even drop my bag, the ground starts to sink with me in the center.
It was only then that fear started to settle within me. My heart sank from my inability to do anything as my mind tried to process what was happening and what was about to befall. My legs shook from the sinking ground as well, to control my balance. I cannot feel the center of gravity in my feet anymore.
In a desperate attempt to escape from the sinking ground, I jumped, trying to outrun the sinking before I go along with it.
Yet it was too late.
The ground crumbled beneath me, revealing a sinkhole. All the adrenaline in my body surges instantly, slowing down time and making the fall to my imminent death seem like an eternity. The rocks from the ground begin to break apart and fall as if it wants to bury me as well if I wasn't dead yet from the fall.
Strangely enough, I thought that when my time comes, I’ll accept Death and warmly embrace it, but it’s too soon and unfair. My arms are both outstretched to the sunlight above, as my mind screams, “I don’t want to die yet!”
The falling rocks fully cover the sunlight as I fully plunge into the darkness, and along it with me as well. Thankfully with the darkness blinding what seems to be my body being crushed and mutilated by the heavy rocks, it only felt like I fell asleep, never to wake up again.
Good night, world.
My eyes slowly fluttered open to a familiar ceiling; particularly, my bedroom. The dark blue-painted star walls and the transparent curtain were both familiar, yet in front of me was some child using my computer. The window outside is also blindingly bright which made it seem impossible to peek outside.
“Um...” I didn’t know what else to say, so I tried to get the young girl’s attention
“Mhmhm!” A proud, laughing sneer came from the child. Still sitting on my gaming chair, she turned around to face me, her shoulders crossed and an arrogant expression that ticks me off for some reason.
“Welcome to the afterlife, Naruhaya Tabito. I have chosen you to–wait, who the FUCK are you?!” Her arrogant expression transforms into a mix of confusion, panic, and surprise after she opened her eyes.
“I should be the one saying that!” I exclaimed back, but I did not get a response because she quickly turned to the monitor. Upon standing up from my bed, I notice that the sounds of mouse clicking and keyboard pressing were all attributed to her--playing Alterra?
If this was the afterlife... It didn't look too bad. The events that transpired earlier haven’t registered in my mind yet.
“Hey, am I really dead?” I asked her.
The young girl was typing before she exclaimed in panic, “No no no...! You’re really dead! I killed the wrong person!”
“I see.” I didn’t know how to react to my death, but I also didn't feel sad or sentimental. I didn’t have much going on in the real world before I died, after all.
The young girl paused her game as she turned around to face me. “It’s because you aren’t supposed to die! I may have pressed your name accidentally while I was looking for a suitable candidate in the Living Database...” She sighs as she sinks into her chair. “Well, I suppose it’s not that big of a deal.”
The girl stood on the gaming chair, clad in a red-colored robe with a two-pointed hat that almost resembled horns. Her red-toned eyes glinted with the light of the bright window.
“Naruki Haruhito, sit,” With one downward motion of her finger, I immediately felt a strong, compelling force that made me sit on the bed.
“My name is Filya, and I am the Goddess of Creation! Your Creator, and the One Above All!” She introduces herself with her arms crossed. It appears to me that she was trying to act superior and intimidating, but her haughty attitude, matched with her small stature, made it seem like she really was someone’s kid lost in my bedroom who was cosplaying as an anime character.
“You’re a child,” Even at this point in the afterlife, I do not believe her being the world’s creator for a bit.
“Wha–” Filya is taken aback by what I said. “I'm not a child, I'm a goddess! Respect and worship me, you dimwitted mortal, should you desire not to die a second time and leave your soul wandering in the empty void of space.”
While she was speaking, I couldn't move a single inch from the bed. Even if she was a goddess, it's impossible not to take her seriously because she looks like a child scolding her older brother.
Filya raised two fingers before saying, “As a token of apology for wrongfully smiting you, I’ll give you two choices. First choice: You can return back to the real world as a baby of a rich family, and you will be a prodigy who will basically have an easy life from that period until his death of old age. Of course, you won’t remember everything that happened here and in your past life. But that’s basically the same as having a guaranteed GAME CLEAR, in your terms.”
Having an assured future was my long-term goal when I was alive back then. It seemed like a compelling idea until I heard about the second choice.
“Second choice: You will be reincarnated in another world with all your memories intact, and I will grant you a power unique only to you, and it will help you fulfill the condition that comes with this choice.”
Curious, I ask her what the condition is.
“The condition?” A crooked smirk appeared on her face, turning her haughty tone into something vicious. “Conquer the world.”
My eyes widened in surprise, the weight of her words starting to add to my fear-turned-excitement.
“There is a prophecy in this world that if the reincarnation of Typhon–the cataclysmic world-ending being of the past–attains something of unimaginable power and influence, he will destroy the world.”
Filya speaks with complete urgency, “You must conquer the world to stop Typhon’s reincarnation from attaining such power because, at this point, no one in this world is showing promise to become the world’s strongest."
After a small pause, I asked her, "What do you mean?"
"The throne is empty and he can take it anytime.”
After she finished explaining, I was given some time to think about my decision.
A safe, fulfilled, and assured life? Or a dangerous life with a chance for absolute glory?
I could never pass up on this opportunity, I said to myself, and I thought I'd never hesitate. I can return back to the real world and be born to rich parents. I’d have tasty food to eat every day, get the games I want, and in the future, I’d die of old age with my life fully satisfied and fulfilled until the very end. While my life in provincial Japan was a bit bland and boring at times, it was a life I'd want to return back to.
But the concept of determinism disgusts me.
“Can you tell me more about which power you'll give me?” As soon as I asked her that, her lips curled into a smirk as if she already knew what my choice was.
“I can’t tell you which power because the World Administrator grants it to you. I'm simply the overseer of this world, I cannot decide things for you.”
“Then–”
“Ughh shut up!” Filya gritted her teeth at my continued barrage of questions. With one flick of a finger, I stood up on my two feet as she pushed me outside the door. “I’m giving you some traits to make your life in this world easier, on top of what you’ll receive.”
“Hey–” I tried to stop my legs from moving while she was pushing me, but I couldn’t. I should probably learn to stop resisting in the presence of this goddess. “I haven’t chosen yet!”
“But you’ve already made up your mind, right?” I could feel Filya using all of her body weight to push me towards the door, with her light grunts indicating her struggle. “Good luck-urgh, Otherworlder! May the Aether guide you among the river of stars.”
“H-hey, what does that mean?! Are you wishing for me to die again?”
“It’s a saying, dumbass!”
The door opened to a blindingly bright light, causing me to close my eyes. I could feel my body hover in the air, the strong gust of wind making it seem like I was flying. Wherever it will take me, I hope it wouldn't be somewhere dangerous.
The light seeping from my eyes significantly dimmed, and the cool breeze of the tropical, rural area that’s so familiar to me blew across me. Opening my eyes, I am greeted with a sight of a forest clearing and the chirping of the birds. I found myself still wearing the same black hoodie and gray pants from "heaven," or wherever I was reincarnated with the goddess, along with a pair of rubber slippers.
At the center of the clearing was a freshwater lake reflecting the afternoon sun. White ducks with yellow beaks are swimming gently above the lake–the kind that exists on Earth.
As I observed my surroundings, the thought that this was another world flew out of my mind. So far, there was nothing notable that separates this world from Earth.
I noticed a cold, slightly heavy weight of metal in my hoodie pocket. I pull it out to see a strange metallic plate with letters I haven’t seen before, but I could somehow read it. “Status Plate” is what it said.
The Status Plate glows blue for a quick moment before three holographic interfaces popped up from within it.
NAME: Luck LVL 10
Life Points LP : 110 Aether ATH: 110
Class: Dicemaster Equipped Weapon: Six-faced White Die
,,,
[Gift from the Goddess]
“By receiving the gift of the Goddess, you must not forget your true purpose in this world.”
10+ LVL UP↑
Class Set to Unique Class: Dicemaster
,,,
[Otherworlder’s Gift]
“Speak with goodness and greatness, for the vilest of words must be paid with your tongue.”
Granted the innate ability to communicate in Traevilyan.
,,,
[Dicemaster’s Covenant]
“Journey in isolation and hardship, Dicemaster. This is a covenant you made.”
Class Change is restricted.
Weapon Change is restricted.
Interclass Skill Sharing is restricted.
Portable storage class items are restricted.
LUCK is permanently set to -50.
When joining a party, your all party members' defense and attack is set to 0 until the party disbands.
All types of Evolution success rates are permanently set to 100%.
,,,
Message from Filya:
Item Attached: [Otherworlder’s Backpack]
"I made sure of granting you the trait to understand Traevilyan, Melsion's primary language! Aside from that, you'll find a guidebook on the fundamental aspects of Melsion. I wrote it myself, so be sure to follow everything there (* ^ ω ). There is also a weapon selector at the end of the guidebook once you read everything. Make sure not to lose it!"
,,,
WORLD ADMINISTRATOR
Because of [Dicemaster’s Covenant], the backpack from [Gift from the Goddess] has not been granted.
Lots of terms I don't know here. And my name in this world is Luck? Ironic, considering my luck stat was basically negative.
From what I can understand, my unique class, Dicemaster, doesn’t have too many special skills to begin with. “The power I get should give me an advantage when starting in this world,” said the goddess. And the backpack that should give me a guidebook and a weapon wasn't granted. What kind of fuckery is this world playing at? Not that it might be useful after all, since my passive skill [Gift of the Goddess] didn’t allow me to use any weapon. That said, how am I supposed to fight monsters with a die?
I put the Status Plate back into my pocket before attempting to test my only skill.
And... I don't know how to cast a skill yet. Do I press it while my interface is active? Do I cast it verbally? Hoping it's the latter, I verbally spoke the name of my skill, “Dice Roll.”
A formation of blue crystals suddenly accumulated at a single point above my palm. I hovered my hand below the blue crystals that looked like it was materializing something, all while doing so instinctively.
“This must be aether, then?” I presumed as I carefully observe the translucent crystals.
The aether above my hand slowly faded into the air as the die materializes fully. It starts to spin quickly before coming to a complete stop as soon as it landed on my palm. The number on the top of the die is... one.
[DICE ROLL: 1]
Unlucky... I muttered a curse under my breath before pocketing the Status Plate and retracting its holographic menu back into itself.
Suddenly, I heard a high-pitched clicking noise coming from the other side of the forest clearing. Emerging from the forest is a beetle that was nearly as big as a dog. It stared at me for a few seconds before it clicked once again--this time, it was more high pitched that it hurt my ears.
The clicking noise soon multiplied exponentially from the background of the forest, and as if that isn’t enough to knock me to my senses, the beetle charged toward me, along with probably its entire family emerging from the forest. Without a weapon or even a viable skill for protection, there was only one thing I could do in this situation.
I started to run as fast as I can into the forest, relying on the belief that I was faster than the beetles and that I'd find help along the way. While running, it didn’t take long for me to assume what my dice roll skill does.
“What the hell, Filya, this class is fucking shit!”
Hello, I'm TSR and this is my first post here! I mainly post on RoyalRoad, but I plan to upload all my chapters here in HFY in hopes of getting feedback about the story and criticism as well. I hope you enjoy!
submitted by onebuddyforlife to u/onebuddyforlife [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 05:53 crypt0crab Busans Street Food and Fake Market Heaven! Nampodong!

This past week my wife and I went over to the area called Nampodong. I heard that this place used to be the old downtown area of Busan, and that this place was well known for having tons of street food and lots of places to shop... and that was an understatement. If you like shopping and eating.. then you should definitely visit this place... and I'll tell you why..
https://preview.redd.it/zg2chhvcvh2b1.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=f0ebab7a07d5c4fad73d42c9a58dfc998464174d
So the whole area of Nampodong can be divided into different sections that all specialize in in their own thing. Some areas had a plethora of street food, with a little bit of shopping, while others were vice versa.

First we'll start with food

If you're looking for street food, then check out Bupyeong Kkangtong Market. This area had TONS of street food, and at night they get even more after they set up their night market! Here you'll find endless amounts of restaurants and food stalls selling dishes that you're probably already familiar with, while at the same time selling others that'll leave you scratching your head wondering what they are. But the food over here didn't disappoint.
First off, we went to a restaurant that specializes in bean curd and glass noodle. We ordered this bean curd pouch soup dish that comes with fish cake, as well as a glass noodle bibimbap dish... that tastes like bibimbap but with noodles instead of rice. The bean curd pouch dish was 100% worth trying, while the other was just so-so in my opinion.
https://preview.redd.it/qh7a0hghvh2b1.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=78832fa3990f9be8f07ea36216fc892f89799bfa
https://preview.redd.it/txwigiwgvh2b1.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=5cd70479ae56721fce0c97308dfcca1a574c5836
Next we went for dukbokki. I'll be the first to say it, I'm not the biggest fan and although I know that everyone makes it a little differently, I've never found one to TRUELY stand out above all others.. until just now. This dukbokki place was FREAKIN good! The sauce tasted way better! I'll be going back again, and I'd recommend literally everyone here to try it out... and that means something coming from someone who isn't a dukbokki lover.
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After that we tried out a deep fried pork dish... and no.. this wasn't just any other tonkatsu or pork cutlet restaurant. Have you ever been to KBBQ and had their marinated grilled pork? Yeah thats right.. they take that pork then they deep fry it. DELICIOUS. if you like grilling marinated pork...TRY IT
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Now lets get to the shopping

The shopping areas over here are SUPER confusing, and this place will feel like you're getting lost in a maze of random stores.
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Gukje market is a series of around 12 buildings with interconnected allyways selling everything under the sun, with some stores selling wholesale goods at crazy prices ( but you need to buy a certain quantity) to wholesale goods, to jewlery, clothing etc. But once you've made it past some of the allyways, then you'll even find tons of korean designer fashion brands that are super cheap, a vintage market selling clothing and even used luxury goods like LV, gucci etc... and then beyond that you'll find a larger allyway that is lined with carts selling every fake name brand that you can ever think of. But this place doesnt just sell t-shirts, shoes and watches, this place even sells replica jewlery, hats, hairbands ... and pretty much everything else that you can think of if you look hard enough.
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Once you've made it past this area then youll arrive at Nampodongs main street, Hwangbokro, which is their fashion street that has all the major clothing brands that you're already familar with. No explanation needed here..
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And beyond here is Biff street, which is where Busan originally held its famous BIFF ( busan international film festival ). Here you'll find a star studded street, similar to that of hollywood where actors will imprint their hand and sign the tile floors.. but of course in a less glamorous way haha Here you'll find tons of other street vendors selling both delicious sweet and salty snacks. Have you ever watched the show 1 Night 2 Days or Infinity challenge? Well these 2 tv shows came here and featured both of the hottoek food vendors.. Everyone makes this korean desert a little differently. In the cheaper places, they usually fry the brown sugar filled dough snack in oil.. but these places fry them completely in sticks of melted butter... but on top of that... they even cut them open and fill them with an assortment of nuts... DELICIOUS! try it.
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If you'd like to see this area, I put together a video that includes directions of how to get around Nampodong, as well as info on how to get there and everything that you'll need to know about this place once you're there. Enjoy :) Bon appetite and happy shopping ! https://youtu.be/LkMJ93kP6Jo
submitted by crypt0crab to busan [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 05:48 InfernoAA God Made the World in Six Days, I’ll Perfect New Japan's on the Seventh Part Two: King George and the Dragon

In Part One, Kazuchika Okada waged war on the wrestling world as part of his quest to purify NJPW, killing BULLET CLUB and giving CHAOS a much-needed facelift in the process. Hirooki Goto and company have since taken refuge under Katsuyori Shibata’s new “Takeover” stable, which has recruited Ren Narita’s services. Sabre-Gun’s been on the up too, expanding to include the likes of Blake Christian and Clark Connors with the recent Best of the Super Juniors, continuing to be at odds with Just6Guys. There’s one group that’s yet to be addressed though, and that’s… United Empire.
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After finally vanquishing Kenny Omega at Forbidden Door, Will Ospreay sets his sights on the next logical step – the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship. With another of his white whales clutching onto it tightly, he wants closure to this legendary saga too, and so, he calls out the Rainmaker. Big Brother Kazu isn’t fazed one bit by the challenge, telling Ospreay he’s been waiting for him, though not to expect a result any different to their many past matches. After all, from Okada’s point-of-view, Will isn’t NJPW’s next destined leader. There’s a different prodigal son waiting.
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Under CHAOS’s new vision, not only has Okada been building a ruthless band of companions willing to follow his regime change, but also focusing on its future, no longer being a top-heavy unit destined to collapse the moment Kazuchika stops supporting its roof. With Hiroshi Tanahashi already bringing in his younger counterpart, Shota Umino, Okada recruits the man prophesised to take over his mantle of Ace one day, Yuya Uemura. His Forbidden Door victory over Wheeler YUTA marking the end of his American excursion, Uemura accompanies his leader’s victory against Blackpool Combat Club in major fashion by accompanying him on the Kizuna Road loop.
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Kizuna Road - Night Four (July 3, 2023)
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CHAOS (Kazuchika Okada & Yuya Uemura) vs United Empire (Will Ospreay & Jeff Cobb)
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Impressing thus far, Yuya’s biggest test comes when he teams with Okada 2-on-2 for the very first time to confront UE’s Ospreay and Cobb, and he quickly silences their criticisms. A one-sided manhandling from Cobb soon turns into Uemura employing strategies passed down to him from Okada on how to beat the Hawaiian Hulk, giving him quite the culture shock, before Okada helps bang the big man’s drum. The flow shifts when Ospreay steps in though, severely outclassing Yuya to both his and Okada’s surprise. This is a different Will to the one Okada faced a year ago in the G1 Climax Finals.
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And yet, the Rainmaker has an ego problem. Tagging in, he tries to shut Will down, only to find for once, Ospreay seems to have his number. When the Commonwealth Kingpin has him beat though, going for the Hidden Blade, Yuya throws himself in harm’s way to buy Okada a moment, allowing Kazuchika to Dropkick Will out the equation, before drilling Cobb with a Rainmaker to win! As Ospreay grits his teeth, he understands it’ll take more than that to outsmart Okada.
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CHAOS def. United Empire (13:45)
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Wrestle Dynasty (July 8, 2023)
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Also on the show:
Sabre-Gun (El Phantasmo, Mikey Nicholls & Shane Haste) (c) vs Ren Narita & Bishamon - NEVER Openweight 6-Man Tag Team Championship
Aussie Open (c) vs CHAOS (Tomohiro Ishii & Shota Umino) - IWGP Tag Team Championship
Hiroshi Tanahashi (c) vs Jeff Cobb - IWGP United States Championship
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Kazuchika Okada (c) vs Will Ospreay IX - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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Across 8 matches, Ospreay has never once beaten Okada cleanly, his only triumph coming from the night of his betrayal in the G1 3 years ago. But now, with a win over the man Okada failed to beat at Dominion, he’s in the best shape he’s ever been to end the reign of tyranny. The question is though, will he? Returning to Madison Square Garden for this historic show, the last time they were here Ospreay was losing to Cobb in a Winner Takes All opener, whilst Okada was winning back the IWGP Heavyweight Championship in the main event. This time, they’re equals.
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Ospreay enters on a throne carried to the ring by UE, hamming up his Commonwealth Kingpin moniker and signalling the days of the Aerial Assassin to be long dead. Okada, on the other hand, is the same old Rainmaker, descending from the heavens on a platform, God mode in full effect. With pre-match introductions out the way, the bell rings, and the match gets underway! And in classic Okada/Ospreay fashion, Kazuchika expects to Big Brother Will with the Tanahashi/Okada-style headlock start… BUT OSPREAY RUSHES HIM WITH THE HIDDEN BLADE!!!
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Caught off guard, Okada only barely evades him, but Ospreay moves like a lightning bolt, instantly transitioning to springboarding off the ropes for an OSCUTTER! Okada catches it and grabs the wrist, ripcording him into a RAINMAKER! Will ducks though, blasting him with a MARUFUJI HOOK KICK! Okada rocked, nails a SILENT WHISPER to the back of the head, before hooking the arms for the STORM BREAKER!!! But yet again, the Rainmaker barely gets out of dodge, shoving Will away and sliding outside for a breather!
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Okada looks like he doesn’t know what’s just hit him, while Ospreay grins and mocks the Rainmaker pose. Snarling, Kazuchika slides back in and gets to trading blows with his challenger. Stiff elbows bounce off their heads in the centre of the ring, an Enzuigiri from Okada whiffing and a Handspring Enzuigiri from Will equally missing the mark! Kazu teases a Dropkick, causing Ospreay to leap, only to meet a stiff Uppercut once gravity gets hold of him.
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Tossed into the ropes for a proper Dropkick attempt, Will instead slides to the apron and thunders in with a PIP PIP CHEERIO! A Running Shooting Star Press misses, Ospreay rolling through and racing back at Okada, though he’s launched onto the top turnbuckle. Again, a frustrated Okada wants the Dropkick, but Ospreay catches the leg and spins him around, nailing an INVERTED TORNADO DDT! Crunch. Here come the neck issues.
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Okada dazed, nursing the injury in agony, Ospreay stomps the hell out of the neck, before connecting with a ROBINSON SPECIAL! He teases a follow-up OsCutter, Okada anticipating it, only to be faked into a SPIKE DDT! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT! Okada DDT’d the life out of Will last time, so Ospreay’s making sure to return the favour here. He goes for broke one too many times though, a Hangman’s DDT attempt ending in Okada spearing Ospreay across the ring and through the ropes, both smacking off the apron to the floor!
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Turning feral ringside, Okada kicks Ospreay senseless like he’s Kaito, before forcefully connecting a DDT of his own! He whips Will at the guardrail for his patented Crossbody spot but Ospreay leaps over, a Silent Whisper staggering Okada, before an OSCUTTER SOARS IN… NOT THIS TIME – OKADA COUNTERS INTO A TOMBSTONE ON THE CONCRETE!!! Getting him back for the G1 Finals, Kazu smugly takes in the boos as Will twitches lifelessly at his feet.
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Tossing him in, a MISSILE DROPKICK guns into his neck, before another BEAUTIFUL DROPKICK smacks into his chest, Okada finally in control! A Flapjack plants Will face-first and an AIR RAID CRASH NECKBREAKER again targets the famously-troubled neck of Ospreay! ONE! TWO! THR-NO DICE! Cinching in the MONEY CLIP, he continues working it over, Will sputtering and gasping for breaths as he reaches out at the ropes. Right as he finds himself inches from them though, a GERMAN SUPLEX dumps him on his neck!
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Okada hits the pose, before dialling up the RAINMAKER… Ospreay snapmares him over, learning from last time to not back him up. and throws the HIDDEN BLADE!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOO!!! Racing up top, Will prepares a Shooting Star Press, though Okada sluggishly rolls to the apron as he grabs at his head. Deciding to change trajectories… OSPREAY NAILS A SUPER OSCUTTER TO THE FLOOR!!! Body aching yet determined, Will rolls back in, only to soar back out with a SASUKE SPECIAL!!!
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Dragging Okada behind him, he drapes him over the top rope, heading back up to finally hit the BURNING STAR PRESS!!! ONE! TWO! THR-OKADA GETS A FOOT ON THE ROPE!!! Keeping his composure, Ospreay murders Okada’s face with Kawada Kicks, before a CHELSEA GRIN knocks him loopy… OSCUTTER INCOMING – OKADA COLLAPSES UNDER!!! Will smacks off the mat, not anticipating it, and lets out a pained grunt as both lay flat on their backs, New York roaring in approval!
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Ospreay finds his feet first and tries to pick Okada from his knees, though it results in him being tripped into the ropes throat-first! DROPKICK MEETS OSPREAY AS HE TURNS AROUND! Okada’s noticeably slower than usual, though he doesn’t let it hinder him, picking Will up to nail a SHORT-ARM RAINMAKER! Ospreay stays upright, returning a forearm smash, but another SHORT-ARM RAINMAKER takes him down! Okada teases the finishing blow, though Will resists, prompting Kazu to spike him with a LANDSLIDE instead! ONE! TWO! THR-OSPREAY SURVIVES!
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Hauling him right back up, Okada shoots again… WILL COUNTERS WITH AN OSCUTT- DROPKICKED OUT THE SKIES! Okada sets up the SPINNING RAINMAKER, but Ospreay nails the DISCUS ELBOW first! HOOK KICK drops him, before the HIDDEN BLADE closes in… OKADA DUCKS AND FIRES A JOHN WOO DROPKICK, SENDING OSPREAY INTO THE OPPOSITE CORNER! AND A HESITATION DROPKICK – SHADES OF SHIBATA! Will in the drop zone, Okada gets an idea, heading up top… HIGH FLY FLOW!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
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Okada scowls, picking Will up for the TOMBSTONE… OSPREAY REVERSES INTO A HITODENASHI DRIVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-OKADA KICKS OUT!!! And now Ospreay hits the Rainmaker pose again! Securing wrist-control, he nails a RAINHAM MAKER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-STILL NO LUCK!!! Ospreay’s running out of options, though refuses to let his confidence waver, sticking to his gameplan. Mauling Okada’s arms, neck, and back with stomps, he picks him for only his second attempt at the ultimate final blow! OSPREAY WANTS STORM BREAKER!!!
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Getting Okada up… KAZU DROPS OUT AND NAILS THE RAINMAKER!!! BUT HE CAN’T COVER, HAVING TO NURSE THE ARM! Both men returning to their feet at the same time, they knock each other dead with strikes, Okada scoring the ENZUIGIRI this time, Ospreay returning the POP-UP FOREARM SMASH! Tearing off the elbow pad, OSPREAY FIRES UP THE HIDDEN BLADE… OKADA COUNTERS INTO THE SPINNING EMERALD FLOWSION!!! NOT AGAIN – THIS COMBO ENDED WILL LAST TIME! Okada spells the end… RAINMAKERRRRRRRRRRRR!!! ONE! THIS IS IT! TWO! MSG IS ON THEIR FEET! THRE… OSPREAY KICKS OUT!!! HE’S STILL IN IT!!!
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Okada looks like he’s seen a ghost, a barely twitching Ospreay laying at his feet with one shoulder raised! Refusing to accept it, the Rainmaker lifts him back up, BEFORE NAILING ANOTHER ON A DEFENCELESS WILL! Ospreay on his knees, head bowed, Kazu lifts him up by the hair to lock gazes with Will’s glazed-over eyes, before throwing a THIRD AND FINAL- OSPREAY HITS THE RAINMAKER!!! Okada drops like he’s been shot!
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And now Will realises this could be it. Struggling back up whilst maintaining wrist-control, he lets out a roar, before nailing a RIPCORD HIDDEN BLADE!!! Okada at his knees now, Will lifts his head up by the hair this time as Kazu dares him to finish him off, too weak to fight back… AND OSPREAY OBLIGES, FISHING HIM INTO A STORM BREAKERRRRRRRRRR!!! ONE! TWO! THREE!!! OSPREAY’S FINALLY DONE IT!!! WE HAVE A NEW CHAMPION!!!
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Will Ospreay def. Kazuchika Okada (c) to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (38:09)
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MSG loses its mind as both men lay exhausted, UE rushing out to celebrate with their leader, helping him to his feet and handing him his prize. Golden tickertape hails from the rafters like Okada Dollars, Ospreay seated on a makeshift arm throne by Cobb and O-Khan, raising his title high, whilst Aussie Open and Catch 22 stand on either side, brandishing their respective titles too! And as Okada recovers, rolling out the ring and returning up the ramp, he locks eyes with Ospreay, giving him a look which reads “I’ll be back.” Will doesn’t let it phase him though. This is his night. He’s earned this moment.
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G1 Climax 33
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Not having to wait long for his first test, he enters his fourth G1 for the first time as reigning champion, redeeming the chance that a neck injury robbed him of in 2021. Heading A Block, he battles CHAOS’s Hiroshi Tanahashi on Night One, who tries to avenge Okada’s loss, though meets the same fate. Will dominates his block, dropping his first match after an undefeated 6 nights, losing to Katsuyori Shibata after their teased program last year at Forbidden Door! Still first though, having victimised SANADA, Shota Umino, EVIL, PAC, and KENTA along the way, he murders El Phantasmo on his 8th night, before meeting Tetsuya Naito in the Block Finals after a 5* duology last year! Finally, El Ingobernable avenges his past losses to punch his ticket to the Finals! As for B Block, a Shingo Takagi victory over Sabre puts him through, setting up a rematch from 2019’s G1 between Naito and Takagi for the Finals, adding fuel to the fire of LIJ’s already turbulent year with SANADA’s betrayal!
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(Other key underlying stories are Naito’s loss to SANADA, KENTA beating Shibata in their first match as part of the TakeoveCHAOS feud, PAC finally returning to the ring as AEW’s representative to throw a spanner into LIJ’s works, Kaito taking Okada to a draw, Goto getting his win back over Okada, Sabre equalising his series with Taichi, and Yuya beating Yota in the first chapter of their Ace vs Dark Ace rivalry that’ll propel NJPW once Okada and Naito pass on the respective mantles.)
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G1 Climax 33 Finals (August 13, 2023)
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Also on this show:
Tetsuya Naito vs Shingo Takagi II - G1 Climax Finals
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United Empire (Will Ospreay & Catch 22) vs Los Ingobernables de Japon (Yota Tsuji, Hiromu Takahashi & BUSHI)
With Naito returning last year’s favour of having the Finals robbed from him by Ospreay, Will instead faces his potential Wrestle Kingdom main event opponent’s factionmates, bringing longest-reigning IWGP Junior Tag Team Champions Catch 22 along for the ride. Whilst using the opportunity to run back his critically acclaimed rivalry with Hiromu Takahashi, he also makes an example out of NEVER Openweight Champion Yota Tsuji, cracking down on the New Generation star to remind Naito and Shingo what he plans to do to them, before pinning BUSHI for the win!
United Empire def. Los Ingobernables de Japon (14:10)
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As UE celebrate their win… BANG! DOUBLE SUPERKICK TO OSPREAY! STEEL CHAIR TO TJP AND FRANCESCO AKIRA! THE ELITE IS HERE!!! No rest for the wicked, Omega plants his boot on Will’s head as he holds the IWGP World Title up, making his intentions crystal clear. His match with Okada ended without a clear victor, and so, he not only wants another crack at the belt, but to crush Ospreay to avenge Forbidden Door. And what better place to do that than Wembley Stadium!
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RevPro 11 Year Anniversary Show (August 26, 2023)
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Will Ospreay vs Ren Narita
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Whilst Ospreay/Omega III is announced for the following night, Will takes care of business in Copper Box Arena the night prior against one Ren Narita, continuing to test out the youth of NJPW, having already faced Yuya, Yota, and Shota in the past month. With Shibata holding a win over Ospreay’s head, promising to be back for the victor of ALL IN’s main event, Will batters his student in the meantime to remind him who the best wrestler in the world is right now, a Hidden Blade slaying Ren!
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Will Ospreay def. Ren Narita (16:07)
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ALL IN: London (August 27, 2023)
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Also on the show:
Zack Sabre Jr. (c)(c) vs Bryan Danielson – NJPW World Television/ROH Pure Championships
FTR (c) vs Aussie Open - AEW World Tag Team Championship
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Will Ospreay (c) vs Kenny Omega III - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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They’ve fought in Japan’s Tokyo Dome, Canada’s Scotiabank Arena, and now, they finally settle the score in England’s Wembley Stadium. 90,000 strong in attendance, there’s a clear crowd favourite here, football chants raining down for Ospreay. Omega decides to lean into it, tapping fully into his Cleaner look and tendencies with Devil’s Sky, absorbing the hatred. Will, on the other hand, receives a standing ovation in an emotional homecoming, prepared to prove his superiority over Omega once and for all and silence those accusing him of lucky past couple months.
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The big first test for Will as champion starts with Kenny trying to get under Ospreay’s skin, stalling him out each time the Commonwealth Kingpin guns for him. Forcing him to work for his golden snitch, Kenny slides out and does jumping jacks until Will takes the bait, Omega quickly repossessing the ring, shutting Ospreay out. Will yells at the referee to back Kenny up, who obliges… ONLY TO EXPLODE FOR A V-TRIGGER THE MOMENT WILL RE-ENTERS!
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Ospreay leapfrogs him and comes off the ropes with a hurricanrana, Omega cartwheeling through and throwing one back, Will handstanding out, though not fast enough, eating a DROPKICK TO THE FACE! Ospreay stunned, Kenny launches him into the corner and dogs on him with vicious kicks and stomps until the referee intervenes, Omega throwing one last chest-slicing chop! Incensed, Ospreay rushes out with forearms for Kenny, lighting him up, the Kawada Kicks finding their mark, before a CHELSEA GRIN’S BLOCKED BY A V-TRIGGER!
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Ospreay shaking off his arm, Kenny capitalises with another V-TRIGGER, but Will ducks, nailing a Hook Kick, an OSCUTTER due to follow… OMEGA SUPERKICKS OSPREAY OVER THE ROPES! Will floored, a RISE OF THE TERMINATOR wipes him out! Gloating as England boos him, an even better idea crosses Kenny’s mind, sliding back in to nail a SASUKE SPECIAL! Nuclear heat. Battering Ospreay about the ring, he teases smashing his head through a table like WK17, though frantic back elbows force him off!
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Kenny seeing stars, Ospreay attempts an OSCUTTER OFF THE GUARDRAIL- V-TRIGGER TO THE BASE OF THE SKULL SNIPES HIM!!! A sickening thud reverberating through the arena as Ospreay’s head snaps forward, a sadistic Kenny lays the section of railing on Will’s body… BEFORE CONNECTING A DIVING DOUBLE FOOT STOMP OFF THE APRON!!! Champion crushed, Omega cackles and dusts off his hands, before kissing Will’s title, eager to bring it home.
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As Kenny taunts the crowd, Ospreay’s managed to feebly crawl out the rubble after the referee checking on him, though as Omega senses this, he’s immediately on his tail. Watching Will try to pull himself up using the steel post, KENNY CHARGES FOR ANOTHER V-TRIGGER… CRACK! OSPREAY MOVES OUT THE WAY, OMEGA’S KNEE HITTING THE STEEL INSTEAD!!! The Cleaner yowls in sheer agony as what was starting to look like another dominant showing takes a drastic left turn!
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Realising this, Will quickly capitalises, grabbing Omega’s wrists from the opposite side of the post, pulling him up to his feet… Kenny hysterically tries to fight Ospreay off, begging him to spare him, realising what’s coming, WILL YANKING OMEGA HEAD-FIRST INTO THE POST!!! Bouncing it off it over and over again, now it’s Kenny that’s busted open! Omega collapsing back to his knees, Ospreay next grabs the leg and SMASHES KENNY’S KNEE INTO THE POST!!! THEN THE GUARDRAIL!!! AND BACK!!! There’s no mercy from Ospreay tonight.
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Rolling Kenny in, he nails Omega’s YOU CAN’T ESCAPE! ONE! TWO! THR-KICK OUT! Forcing Omega to use the bad leg to free himself, Will goes right back to targeting it, kicking the inside of the knee and slamming it against the mat! SHOOTING STAR PRESS TO THE LEG! Omega can’t even be whipped across the ring, collapsing half-way, a ROBINSON SPECIAL crushing him instead! AND A SLINGSHOT CUTTER! ONE! TWO! THR-NO LUCK!
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Hooking the arms, Ospreay wants STORM BREAKER, but Omega counters into a hurricanrana pin for 2! A Running Knee Strike from Will comes up empty, Kenny flattening him with a SNAP DRAGON SUPLEX! AND A SECOND! KOTARO KRUSHER FOLLOWS! Smacking the leg to keep up, an AOI SHOUDOU plants Ospreay! ONE! TWO! THR-WILL STAYS IN IT! A Doctor Bomb attempt is subdued, Ospreay hammering the knee to escape, before a ROUNDHOUSE cleans Kenny’s clock, a POISONED FRANKENSTEINER standing him up, and an ESSEX DESTROY- POP-UP V-TRIGGER!!!
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Kenny desperately tries getting a limp Will on his shoulders for the ONE WINGED ANGEL, using the ropes for help, but Ospreay leans forwards, tumbling onto the apron to escape! SILENT WHISPER blasts Kenny… OMEGA THROWS A V-TRIGGER BACK, KNOCKING WILL OUT! Leg searing yet title more important, Kenny gingerly lifts Ospreay up the ropes with him, before going for OH GOD A MIDDLE ROPE CROYT’S WRATH!!! OSPREAY FLIPS TO HIS FEET!!!
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The sneer on Omega’s face slowly fades as realisation strikes him, shades of Ibushi/Ospreay, Will not even giving him a chance to respond, HOOK KICK CONNECTING! OSCUTTERRRRRRRRR!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Frustrated, Ospreay hammers on the cut on Kenny’s forehead, painting his own chest with Omega’s blood, BEFORE REMOVING THE TURNBUCKLE PAD! He wants to return the favour from WK! Taking Kenny to the top rope, Ospreay teases a DDT onto the exposed steel… Omega slips between his legs to the mat and CROTCHES WILL ON THE METAL!!!
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Kenny cackles as Ospreay howls, before packaging his head and nailing a CHEEKY NANDOS KICK! Blasting Will repeatedly, a V-TRIGGER FOLLOWS, SMASHING WILL’S HEAD INTO THE STEEL!!! AND HE SPINS HIM AROUND – AVALANCHE PHOENIX-PLEX!!! ONE! TWO! THR-NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Kenny beats on Will’s fresh cut, leaving both men bloody messes, before readying a V-TRIGGER… Ospreay grabs Omega’s foot! Pissed, Kenny shakes him off, nailing a STANDING V-TRIGGER straight to the cut, BEFORE SPIKING HIM WITH AN IBUSHI-STYLE BASTARD DRIVER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-OSPREAY SURVIVES AGAIN!!!
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Ospreay’s body limply leaning on the ropes, Kenny cocks and fires a V-TRIGGER, Will simply bouncing back head-first onto the Canadian! Setting him back, Omega takes another run-up, NAILING HIM WITH A SECOND IN SUCCESSION!!! The champion still out on his knees, twisted thoughts run through Kenny’s mind, prepping his elbow… HE WANTS TO CONCUSS WILL LIKE OSPREAY DID IBUSHI AT WK13!!! OMEGA THROWS THE HIDDEN BLADE… V-TRIGGER FROM OSPREAY!!! Sparking to life, he grabs the wrists and ripcords for a RAINHAM MAKER!!! ONE! TWO! THR-KENNY’S STILL IN IT!!!
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Omega on dream street, Ospreay locks and loads THE HIDDEN BLADE, CONNECTING FLUSH ON KENNY’S JAW!!! But as Will goes to cover, Omega collapses out the ring! Ospreay’s lets out a frustrated wail, but he makes the chase all the same, kicking the lifeless Kenny about ringside. A weak chop from Omega meets a sickening forearm, and a wild punch completely misses, Kenny’s legs giving out. TIGER SUPLEX DUMPS HIM ON THE FLOOR!!! Kenny now fully collapsed, Ospreay gets an idea… PULLING OUT A LADDER FROM UNDER THE RING!!!
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Clearing the commentary table, he hoists The Cleaner onto it, before propping the ladder next-door and climbing! Sending a silent prayer to the skies, OSPREAY LAUNCHES OFF WITH A PHOENIX SPLASH, CONNECTING ALL OF IT!!! The crowd goes ballistic with the two men dead in the rubble, both unmoving for several seconds until Will finally faintly grins to himself for returning a taste of WK17’s table. Dragging himself inside, he flops into his corner, lying in wait for the challenger, who has the look of a soulless corpse once he finds his feet and locks eyes with Ospreay, barely rolling inside at 9 but immediately collapsing again.
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Ready to end it, Will crawls over and lifts Kenny to his knees by the wrists, SCORING A KAMIGOYE-STYLE HIDDEN BLADE!!! Omega rocked, Ospreay backs up to his corner for seconds, BUT KENNY PULLS THE REFEREE INTO THE WAY! Will catches himself in time, pausing in his tracks, though is left exposed to a LOW BLOW!!! Wembley goes mental with boos as Kenny weakly chuckles, feebly clawing up to his feet up a confused referee to nail a V-TRIGGER!!! Lifting him by the wrists, a RAIN TRIGGER FOLLOWS!!! AND HE GETS THE ELECTRIC CHAIR AGAINST ALL ODDS… BUT HE COLLAPSES!!!
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Omega shakes his head in denial, tearing up, his golden ticket in the palm of his hands! Heaving himself back up, he tries again, but Will anchors his body to the ground! Incredulous, he grabs Ospreay by the hair, who grins mockingly, AND SLAMS AN UGLY REAR KAMIGOYE INTO THE BACK OF HIS HEAD!!! COVER!!! ONE! T-KICK OUT!!! OSPREAY KICKS OUT AT ONE!!! Though still completely out of it, the act of sheer defiance certainly sees Kenny’s confidence shatter in real time, who like an unhinged animal beats on Ospreay’s forehead gash until Omega too collapses next to him!
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In a last-ditch effort, he staggers to his feet and puts Will’s head between his legs, wanting a CLASSIC PILEDRIVER!!! OSPREAY HANDSTANDS OUT!!! Omega’s horrified- HIDDEN BLADE!!! ONE TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD!!! Kenny kneeled, Ospreay stands next to him, prepping the OsCutter, but Omega grabs him by the tights! No force in him though, he tells Will to look him in the eyes… AND HE FLIPS HIM OFF!!! SILENT WHISPER TO KENNY!!! AND AN OSCUTTER!!! Rolling through, he deadlifts him up, CONNECTING THE STORM BREAKERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! ONE! TWO! THREE!!!
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Will Ospreay (c) def. Kenny Omega to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (43:29)
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At long last, it’s over. In front of his own people, the Commonwealth Kingpin has proven he’s Japan’s top gaijin and the most valuable wrestler today. Handed his gold, he watches as a prideful Omega refuses help, mustering up the strength to drag himself up using the ropes, before meeting Will’s gaze. At the end of the first match, he gloated. At the end of the second, he was crushed. But now? He gives Will a subtle nod of respect, officially passing the torch as he takes his bow, leaving Ospreay to take over the world.
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Whilst he may have knocked down his two biggest obstacles in Okada and Omega, a dark horse third awaits him back in Japan by the name of Katsuyori Shibata! The only other individual to beat Will in the G1 other than the winner himself, he calls him out for a shot, still waiting on a reign of his own. A determined Ospreay doesn’t back down, though when he goes for a rare show of respect in a press conference heading in, extending a hand as the bigger man, Shibata outright refuses to shake! Seeing through Will’s superficialness, he declares that he owes Ospreay no respect, refusing to accept him as the company’s face that they’ve so desperately tried to mould him into. He was held back for choosing to carve his own path away from the Musketeers, and now he’s going to stick it to the company by exposing their golden boy like Sakura Genesis 2017! Will grits his teeth but says nothing, knowing he’ll just need to prove himself again.
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Wrestle Grand Slam in Belluna Dome (September 10, 2023)
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Also on the show:
Yota Tsuji (c) vs Yuya Uemura - NEVER Openweight Championship
Catch 22 (c) vs CHAOS (SHO & Taiji Ishimori) - IWGP Junior Heavyweight Tag Team Championship
Aussie Open (c) vs FTR - IWGP Tag Team Championship
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Will Ospreay (c) vs Katsuyori Shibata III - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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In only the third IWGP World Title match of his career, 6 years since the infamous incident, The Wrestler receives a chance to redeem all the troubles he was put through and avenge his pupil Narita in the process. As for Ospreay, having lost to Shibata in both their matches in 2017 and 2023 respectively, he must carve out his spot definitively by knocking down another of his white whales. Taking place interestingly in KENTA’s hometown, Katsuyori’s even more driven to stick it to the man he despises most and lost to in the G1 by winning here, a pair of rather simple, stoic entrances setting the tone for the main event.
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Initially, just like the G1, Shibata starts by beating the hell out of the much younger star to humble him, though Ospreay’s much quicker to put up his fists this time, learning. Youthful arrogance sees him get a couple teeth knocked down his throat though, his patented elbows instantly receiving a much stiffer receipt from Shibata, dropping him dead! Unable to outstrike the most dangerous man in New Japan, Will instead leans on his weight advantage, brutally slamming him down with London Has Fallen and scoring a vicious Liger Bomb to boot. Growing comfortable, he attempts the OsCutter, BUT IS CAUGHT WITH A SLEEPER!
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Choked to a plum colour, the finishing PK narrowly misses, Ospreay dropping him with an ESSEX DESTROYER instead! Cruelling focusing on the skull, Will regains advantage, getting nasty with Kawada Kicks and a CHELSEA GRIN that rocks Shibata! An aerial attempt is again blocked, Shibata evading a Shooting Star Press and simply slapping the hell out of Will! A B*TCHMAKER almost ends him, Katsuyori mocking him as a lesser Okada, but Will takes it personally, rocking him with a brutal Running Knee Strike and nailing a SPIKE PILEDRIVER! Shibata on his knees, inviting Will to give him his best, a (protected) HIDDEN BLADE cracks him upside the head, Ospreay knocking the striker out cold for 3 to retain!
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Will Ospreay (c) def. Katsuyori Shibata to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (31:46)
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Doubt him, and you’ll be made to regret it. Though earlier in the night, Catch 22’s legendary reign came to an end, United Empire is stronger than ever with Ospreay taking down a murderer’s row of competition. Selling out MSG, Wembley, and a Dome, he only continues to elevate to higher heights. Whilst Shibata is left to be mugged by KENTA to close the show, Will can walk away proud of himself, on the run of a lifetime.
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With the Burning Spirit tour up next leading into a second homecoming in one reign for Ospreay at Royal Quest III, there’s one man in particular that’s been barking up his tree as of late, and that’s the NJPW World Television and ROH Pure Champion Zack Sabre Jr.! Someone who’s been a thorn in Will’s side every step of the way and vice versa, he’s not content holding just two titles, wanting to reclaim his status as Zacky Three Belts, and what better way to do that than with the World Championship! Citing his far superior record and win in their last meeting in 2022’s New Japan Cup, Ospreay grants him a chance to show how deserving he truly is.
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Burning Spirit - Night Six (September 23, 2023)
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Birds of Prey (Will Ospreay & Robbie Eagles) vs Sabre-Gun (Zack Sabre Jr. & Gabriel Kidd)
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Will picking his close friend Robbie Eagles to join him (who defected to United Empire during CHAOS’s rebranding after dissension with Lio Rush over Sakura Genesis’s IWGP Junior Heavyweight Championship shot), Sabre chooses an interesting ally of his own in Sabre-Gun’s rising star Gabriel Kidd! Zack’s empire slowly growing across 2023 with the additions of El Phantasmo, El Desperado, TMDK, Blake Christian, Clark Connors, and Kosei Fujita, Kidd’s been another that’s greatly impressed since his return from excursion, joining Zack in a tag on the G1 Finals Night to officially become part of the stable, playing off their history of fighting until respect was reached. Originally set to challenge Ospreay for his RevPro Undisputed British Heavyweight Championship last year until a mental health break cancelled those plans, unfinished business stands between the two, Kidd still looking to get Will back for chipping his elbow in a Ladder match back in WCPW 6 years ago.
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The animosity between the two very much shows here, as even with Ospreay ascending to untouchable heights in the past year, he’s still the same Will to Kidd, who incessantly targets him throughout the match, wanting his pound of flesh. Will, of course, outclasses him, using his incredible chemistry with Eagles to keep Gabriel at bay, though their shifted focus does open the doors for ZSJ to employ his cunning, bending Ospreay’s arm over the guardrail with an Article 50 before massacring Robbie, an Orienteering With Napalm Death decisively tapping him out! Holding up all three belts as a hurt Will composes himself, Zack sends a definitive statement of things to come.
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Sabre-Gun def. Birds of Prey (14:25)
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Royal Quest III - Night Two (October 8, 2023)
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Also on the tour:
Aussie Open (c) vs Los Ingobernables de Japon (Tetsuya Naito & Shingo Takagi) - IWGP Tag Team Championship
Jon Moxley (c) vs Katsuyori Shibata - IWGP United States Championship
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Will Ospreay (c) vs Zack Sabre Jr. XVI - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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And so, for the 16th time ever, Ospreay and Sabre are set to go head-to-head! The record 9-6 in Zack’s favour, the Windy Man is nothing short of wholly confident in his own abilities, whilst Will once more enters with a chip on his shoulder, needing to show himself he’s outgrown Sabre for good. For once, London is split directly down the middle between these two, both men having grown up an hour either side from the venue, each in a completely different position since their last meeting, Ospreay on top as the World Champion and Okada-beater, and Sabre now heading a stable of his own like Will, with NJPW singles gold of his own like Will.
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Duelling chants of United Empire and Sabre-Gun, both men are perhaps at their most ruthless they’ve been all year here, which is saying something for Ospreay considering his clashes with Omega, the hatred he shows Sabre unlike anything he’s felt for anyone else, wanting to wipe the sneer off his face. He had Okada figured, he had Omega figured, he even eventually had Shibata figured, but ZSJ is one puzzle which feels like running into a brick wall for Captain Dyslexia, the Technical Wizard tying the champion up into knots that are unheard of!
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Taunting, bullying, torturing, Sabre picks Ospreay apart with such drive and intensity that it becomes crystal clear just how starved he’s been of NJPW’s top title. Conversely, Will’s just forced to do his best, picking his spots to remind the world he’s still very much in there, not letting the challenger shake him down to his core. A Selected Technical Works Vol 2. does get Ospreay in a bind, though he shows progression from all his matches with Sabre, managing to hang with him technically just enough to survive, forcing Zack to keep switching up his submissions. A European Clutch gets the closest call though, ZSJ very nearly flash-pinning Will for the strap!
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That unlocks a whole other beast inside Ospreay, exploding with an uninterrupted 5-minute stretch of offence that has Sabre utterly overwhelmed, Will standing his ground! A HIDDEN BLADE nearly captures another victim, though the impact’s cushioned by Ospreay’s damaged arm dating back to their tag, keeping Zack alive! Still, Will keeps pushing, solely working a striking game despite the searing pain in his limbs, all in the name of strategy, managing to convince an overconfident Sabre to strike with him, though as has been a recurring theme in 2023, Zack gets mauled! And with his guard let ever so slightly down, the hyperfocus on an Article 50 gives way to a STORM BREAKER after being broken on the mat! ONE! TWO! THREE!!!
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Will Ospreay (c) def. Zack Sabre Jr. to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship (33:50)
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Yet again, it’s Ospreay that rules the kingdom with world-class wrestling acumen! As Will collects his title, Sabre cursing under his breath and vowing to be back someday as he leaves with his own two… OUT COMES SHINGO!!! Losing with Naito against Aussie Open for the Tag Titles earlier in the night, the two growing more distant with each other ever since SANADA’s LIJ betrayal put the faction on shaky grounds, Naito’s G1 Finals victory over Shingo only causing further dissension, which they failed to smooth over against the Aussies, the Dragon’s reaching his last wits. And as he eyes Ospreay’s title, it’s clear what he’s here for.
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Not receiving a rematch ever since losing the title at Wrestle Kingdom 16, he’s been kept on an empty stomach long enough, his patience wearing thin. Extending a challenge to Will, he wants to be the one walking into WK defending the strap against Naito! Ospreay, uber-confident in his ability to slay his rival once more, accepts!
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Battle Autumn - Night Eight (October 23, 2023)
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United Empire (Will Ospreay, Jeff Cobb, Aussie Open) vs Los Ingobernables de Japon (Shingo Takagi, Tetsuya Naito, Yota Tsuji, Hiromu Takahashi)
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The Battle Autumn tour pits UE and LIJ against each other in various tags, with Ospreay and co. winning every single one thus far, the issues between Takagi and Naito even spilling into here whilst the rest of LIJ tries to play the role of mediator. With UE dominating and Shingo’s shot mere days away though, they agree something needs to change. And so, for the sake of the greater LIJ family, they do their best to stay out of each other’s ways, finally stringing together some respectable momentum.
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As Aussie Open goes for the Coriolis on Naito, Shingo bursts in off tagging Tetsuya’s back, nailing a PUMPING BOMBER on Davis to knock Tetsuya off his shoulders, before a Pumping BombeDestino combo on Kyle and a LAST OF THE DRAGON breaks the LIJ curse, though going right back to sharing tense stares, Naito ultimately nodding to Shingo, wishing him luck. Ospreay, however, stands unfazed, knowing Takagi’s the one with the chip on his shoulder this time.
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Los Ingobernables de Japon def. United Empire (18:38)
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2023.05.28 05:31 Omselini Life goals accomplished after attending Seventeens LOVE fan meeting in Tokyo! (i-Carat perspective)

Hi Carats 💎
I always found it interesting and very helpful reading about other people’s experiences seeing SVT live. I was super lucky to get to see our boys in Tokyo / Japan for their LOVE Fan Meeting (May 27)! I am an international Carat, European to be precise - and as Hybe keeps ignoring our continent I had to go all in to see our boys (I was lucky to see them in Chicago for BeTS last year as well) 🥺 I’ll share my personal experiences and how I managed to get tickets to a Japanese show - upfront: it wasn’t easy and hella expensive!
The following text will be super detailed (and quite personal - as I texted this to my friends as well) so just jump to whatever section you find interesting 😊 disclaimer: this all is my personal subjective view, other people might have had other experiences.
Be aware there will be spoilers ahead (e.g. setlist, outfits, games) for the final LOVE show in Tokyo today!

Short summary

Only regretful things (this is me whining for no reason): Coups being out sick (get well soon leader, we missed you - but the boys covered you well ♥️), no never-ending encore song, no Super performances (but little dance challenges) and although I had an amazing view of the full stage from the upper tiers the boys were still little and hard to distinguish. I once even mixed up Woozi and Mingyu - only Dino was easy spotable with his pink head 😂 and oh… I forgot that they would sing Japanese versions of their song!

Members

S.Coups: I missed him so much! And I didn’t understand a word but I think Jeonghan said something about filling up the empty spot - cause everyone started cheering 😂 At the games section every member had a pillar that they had to fill up with hearts by winning games and it was so cute seeing Coups had all hearts right away!
Jeonghan: his hair is so curly and he really is part of the iron deficiency line - he was teamed up with Vernon, and oh boy, this guy was on fire 😂 Jeonghan was his cute usual, I’m not sure if he gave Carats sweets again for the encore but I saw him carrying around a bag!
Joshua: he was the usual cheeky, gentle sexy!! Manifesting SeokSoon as one of the funniest pairs - they were paired up for the games and just showed again that they’re hilarious together! Shua was cheeky and cheating while playing games and charming while talking to the MC! I mentioned they collected hearts to win the games - and every time the MC counted the numner of hearts, Shua popped up in front of the MC forming a heart over his head to be counted as heart as well 😂
Jun: gosh - he’s so handsome I can’t take it! And just as I perceived him in Chicago, he proved again that he’s my concert bias wrecker. He loves fooling around with Carats. Always doing hearts, winking, waving to us! He also danced a bit of limbo cause one challenge was a limbo game! 🔥 He paired up with Mingyu for the games - my personal visual death! When he changed to his 2nd outfit (the low cut silky black shirt with black pants) I nearly fainted! And he did the Cat move that Jeonghan teached him 🐱 he truly is the cutest cat boyyyy
Hoshi: our tiger, our prince, our pure hypeness! Of course his introduction lasted 20 minutes again 🐯 loved his vocals in _World, Fighting was so fun and he truly is the biggest Woozidan! I’ll talk about the games section later but that was so much fun, the variety god really does Carats well 😂 besides: the way he looked into the crowed, soaking in the atmosphere and realizing that they made it into Tokyo Dome for a fanmeeting (!) - you can truly see the stars in his eyes!
Wonwoo: he is just so handsome! He was paired up with Boo for the games and they were so cute and fun together 🥹 he was in the spotlight a lot - I can’t even pinpoint a certain memory. It was just lovely seeing him!
Woozi: dudeee, he is so hot with that dark eye make up and the wet long hair! 🔥 he was paired up with Hoshi and he hated it hahahah I love how you can see, how much he loves and lives each of their songs. He sings every line with all his heart.
THE8: His hair looks great with the mullet and bright streaks in the front. He was paired up with Dino and in one game they pulled a dinosaur figure and he played around with the toy, making it sit on Dinos shoulder and biting him 🦕
Mingyu: he looked really young, the hair and face/make up make him look like his version of 2019? Boy is SO aware of the camera, it’s insane… every other minute he is looking into one camera, running towards another camera, sending kisses, winking… 😂 And of course the members teased him again and asked him to do the sexy version of that one challenge they’re all into right now! And his vocals in the beginning of FML - right after Coups intro? I got damn chills and teary eyes. He is one of the members, that I personally underestimated the most regarding vocals and rap but he is stunning live - he truly is not just a pretty face but the full package ♥️
DK: our sunshine! All of them did this challenge which sounds like a children’s song? - and DK did nothing special just his beautiful, gorgeous wide smile and wholesome eye smile and radiated pure happy sunshine and every Carat just melted - he always lighten up the place ☀️ his vocals in Campfire are insane, this boy is amazing - I can’t even put in words!
Seungkwan: uri lovely, handsome, beautiful, funny, witty, variety king BOO! He’s just so funny, he knows exactly what to do to make Carats laugh 😂 I love him so much and I hope then world treats him better and better every day.
Vernon: I’m not sure if I like the black short hair, but he looks amazing nonetheless. He was soooo hyped when playing games! Especially paired up with Jeonghan, his hyung had no chance. Vernon was always running towards the games on the extended stages, but had to wait for Jeonghan to play, but that boy walked sooo slowly hahaha Vernons raps and vocals are so raw - it’s incredible how real this boy is! 💯 and ofc seeing him rapping in Fighting - my life is complete!
Dino: our pink Maknae! The hair is so crispy - I’m wondering why it doesn’t break and falls off. And he turned into Usain Bolt at the end! ⚡️ when they said their goodbyes, some members just went back to the main stage, sitting down - others went to each extend stage and waved to us. But Dino took it to the next level and was just running from one side to the other endlessly.

Performances

It was truly a fan meeting with lesser performances and more focus on games and the members themselves!
No Super stage… but it didn’t fit the vibe anyway. This was all flower boys Seventeen 🌸
They had 3 outfit changes, started with blue/white jeans, switching over to hoooot all-black black satin/lace shirts and jackets UGH I barely survived. Juns and DKs shirt was sooo low cut and Boos inner shirt was lace 🔥 and then the merch clothes as encore outfit!
My My was soo lovely! The Caratbongs were synced and for Bout You it was a lovely ocean of rose quartz/pink/lavendel light.
FML made me tear up and then they sealed the deal with Fallin Flower right after!! Woah, absolutely stunning and gorgeous 🥹 I couldn’t even see the members clearly as they performed on the main stage (not the extended one) and wore the dark outfit, plus the stage lights were pointing towards the crowd... but nonetheless - I can now die in peace.
I really got teary eyes at that stage as it’s one of my absolute fav Kpop song and the most anticipated performance ever - and during the song I just continuously shaked my head in awe. I realized once again that (… Hoshis voice please hahaha) J and K Carats are soooo lucky to be able to experience this absolute master piece in real life. ♥️
All the other songs were just perfect choices of sweet SVT music (World, Oh My, All My Love and Campfire or a bit more energetic like Run To You and Fighting). Loved the setlist!

Games

I have to tell this part in all it’s lengthiness and amazingness!
So it started with solo games first. They had to answer questions with A or B and the other members could bet if they’ll be right or wrong. Every right answer gave them hearts. ♥️ the absolute highlight: the questions (mostly around GoSe) and member order is random, I believe, and Wonwoo happen to got asked what his famous word from the Insomnia GoSe was - and variety god must love us cause I freaking heard TASTY live 👅 I - and around 55k other Carats - are the luckiest people alive!!
The top 3 winner after these 12 questions got to chose the member they’ll pair up for the duo games first! For selecting there was a pot with random pickets of all members in it and Boo started and picked two out of fun, not looking at them, teasing Carats and members by playing around with his eyes closed which one he should take and blindly chose Wonwoo 😎
Then it was Juns turn and Mingyu was behind him acting all cute for the cameras while Jun draw the picket - and it happen to be Mingyu 🤞 destiny!
And then was Woozi and 55k Carats screamed “Hoshi Hoshi Hoshi” and I realized, holy shit, shipping is BIG in Japan. And then… omg… Woozi also pulled out two just for fun and he turned the faces towards the crowd and you wouldn’t believe it HE PULLED HOSHI AND HIMSELF?! like WHAT THE HELL. Whats the chance of this happening? Him picking two for fun, everyone screaming Hoshi and then he didn’t pull Hoshi next to another member but next to himself🤩 thanks to some brave carats, that filmed and uploaded it
Other pairings: Funniest duo - DK Shua Hype vs non hype - Vernon Jeonghan And Dino Minghao last, they called themselves “THE-D” (you know how the pronunciation sounds the same hahha) 😂
Trying to keep it short but there were 3 extended stages, each of them with a different game (they had to find hidden hearts - which were either hidden in balloons, wrapped gift boxes or locked cases. They had to break those cases/boxes open and find the hearts)
And it was always 3 teams against each other and DK/Shua chose first and ofc they made it fun, Shua (I think) covered DKs eye with his hand and pointed his finger in one direction (meaning to one of the extended stage with a certain game) and asked “this one?” until DK said yes.
And Hoshi Woozi were second and did the same and holy shit the crowd went feral when Hoshi covered Woozis eyes with his hand 😂 and then he pointed in one direction and as Woozi said yes the whole crowd collapsed. Cause Woozi accidentally chose the game where the members have to burst a balloon in between them 😂 he hated it so much!
Actually after the last round SoonHoon were on the last place, therefore they got an extra game and won the chance to steal points from other members. They ripped Shua apart and took all his points making them the overall winners. 😂 And they got crowned as LOVE KINGS - Hoshi living his dream! And after a lot of unwillingness Woozi completed Hoshis hand heart and the crowd went crazy again!!!
The games section was sooo fun and holy shit I didn’t know where to look, there was just SO MUCH GOING ON! I was so thankful the games were self explanatory and no language skills needed! 💯 The MC was lovely (I believe it’s the one accompanying them since their debut in Japan!) and soo humble. While they were playing games and seated on the extended stage he just sat on the floor instead of grabbing a chair. So cute 🤩

Ticketing

It’s probably well known that it’s nearly impossible for foreigners to get tickets to a Japanese concert, as it requires a Japanese address and phone number. So after checking some websites I decided to try out several proxies and only got a positive reply from this one: Tickets Galore. Filling up the form is the easy part and they replied to me within a day.
I started requesting ticket support right after LOVE was announced end of February and only got confirmation at midnight the day of the concert and got the physical ticket 2h before the show started. Midway through I already gave up several times😭
My proxy was not able to get tickets for the Lawson lottery (not a fanclub lottery but of the ticket provider which is open to public) and also not for general sales. 😭
At 8pm the day before the show they released seats with restricted view for general public but again she didn’t manage to get a ticket for me. In the end they texted me at midnight saying she found a reseller who would meet up before the concert and that’s how I got the ticket for a seat in the restricted view area.
Things to consider:
  1. time zone differences and email communication only was tricky as sometimes I/her missed a mail or replied hours too late
  2. resale fanclub tickets were available in a lot of cases but ID check is guaranteed so no chance of getting in
  3. trusting in the reseller to be legit and hoping for no random ID check of general seats (organizer announced to check ALL fanclub seats and random general seats)
  4. paying more and more fees for the additional effort the proxy put it 💸
  5. uncertainty about the ticket handover (for me the reseller told the proxy where and when to meet and what they would be wearing, luckily I was wearing something bright yellow and the reseller recognized me)
  6. lots of back and forth mails asking about updates, available tickets for higher prices, etc. - my inbox is full of her mails. ✉️
  7. You can request a maximum budget or preferred seats with the proxy and they’ll let you know what the market offers
But personally all was more than worth it in the end!! Original price of the ticket was around 12.000¥ and I paid around 51.000¥ incl fees (I assume I end up at around 10.000¥ in fees for the proxy - as it was not super clear how much the ticket price was in the end).
Experience with Ticket Galore: very responsive, a bit intransparent about the actual fees and sometimes doesn’t reply to all the questions. But still highly recommendable!
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Thanks for reading ♥️ I'll probably come back later and add links if I come across videos or tweets. If you have any questions or just want to share your thoughts or own experience feel free to share. Horanghae!! 🐯
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2023.05.28 05:10 KirkHammettJigsaw Booking the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship From Wrestle Kingdom 17 Part II Can We Give Paddy Murphy The World Title?

Booking the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship From Wrestle Kingdom 17 Part II Can We Give Paddy Murphy The World Title?
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https://preview.redd.it/ndcz4fl54j2b1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=0ff5ce6a845e102560bcc9556569da910350c092
After regaining his IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, Kazuchika Okada has the unfortunate responsibility of carrying the championship into the single most grueling tournament in all of professional wrestling: the G1 Climax. New Japan has decided to revert to the old format: twenty competitors, two blocks, nine matches per wrestler, and no semi-finals. Thirty minutes per block match, and the finals have no time limit. The highest scoring competitor from each block advances to the finals, and the winner of the finals goes on to compete for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestle Kingdom. Now, if you’re wondering why I’m not doing the most recent G1 Climax formatting, there are two reasons. The first is that NJPW has announced the schedule, and it seems to line up more with a traditional G1 format. The second reason is that I REALLY DON’T WANNA FUCKING WRITE A FOUR BLOCK G1. With all that out of the way, let’s talk about who’s in the blocks!
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A BLOCK
  • Kazuchika Okada: Of course, the very first entry in G1 Climax 33 is the man that all other nineteen men are gunning for: the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, The Rainmaker himself, Kazuchika Okada. He just won his gold back, and he’s looking to hold on to it. If he manages to win the G1, he’ll be able to pick his own opponent for Wrestle Kingdom, and that’s a very appealing prospect for The Rainmaker.
  • Shingo Takagi: The Last Dragon is a former IWGP World Heavyweight Champion in his own right, but it has been a quieter year for him than he’s used to. He failed to capture the title in his one challenge so far this year, but the G1 is a golden, shining opportunity, and we all know that dragons love their gold. He’s always dangerous.
  • Bryan Danielson: Surprise! After capturing the IWGP United States Championship at Forbidden Door 2, pinning Will Ospreay, The American Dragon has decided to come to Japan and compete in a tournament that he has always wanted to participate in. Can he take things a step further and win the whole damn thing?
  • KENTA: The Bullet Club member may not be what he once was, but he’s still KENTA, and he can always go on a run when he needs to. Right now? He needs to. If he can win the G1, he just needs to be perfect on one night, and that’s January 4th. He’s more than capable of pulling that off.
  • David Finlay: He’s the self-proclaimed leader of Bullet Club, and in the absence of Jay White, Irish EVIL has to flourish if he wants to make sure that the Pew Pew Crew continues to be seen as the most dangerous faction in all of NJPW. They’d look pretty intimidating with a World Champ at the helm, wouldn’t they?
  • Ren Narita: The Son of Strong Style looked good when he challenged for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship earlier this year, but he won’t be satisfied until he puts that championship around his waist and fulfills the expectations that his trainers have put on his shoulders. Can he shock the world?
  • Jeff Cobb. Big. Mean. Hawaiian. United Empire’s resident hoss is forever one of the most dangerous men in the company, but he hasn’t been able to break through and prove himself to be World Championship material just yet. He’s not getting any younger, either. Will his time ever come?
  • Tama Tonga: He’s The Good Guy. Tama Tonga has flirted with the main event scene plenty in the past, but now, he doesn’t have the Bullet Club machine backing him anymore. Can Tama Tonga prove that he doesn’t need the black-and-white baddies to win the G1 Climax for the very first time?
  • EVIL: Irish EVIL is already here, so we decided to get regular EVIL too. Another former IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, EVIL hasn’t come close to reaching those heights ever again. The G1 Climax can change a man’s fortune extremely quickly, so who knows? Maybe Everything will be EVIL once again.
  • Toru Yano: He’s gotta be here somewhere, doesn’t he? Toru Yano will never win a G1 Climax, that’s just a reality. However, despite his antics, he is a legitimately dangerous spoiler. Every now and then, his plans work out, and he can derail somebody’s hopes of winning in an instant.
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B BLOCK
  • Tetsuya Naito: First up in the B Block is perhaps the most beloved man in the entirety of NJPW, Tetsuya Naito. Naito is starting to get some ring miles on him, he’s starting to break down just a touch, but he is still one of the best competitors that New Japan has to offer. Everybody wants to see him succeed. Can he once again climb to the top of the mountain?
  • Hiroshi Tanahashi: If anybody in NJPW is more beloved than Tetsuya Naito, it’s this guy. New Japan’s perpetual Ace, Hiroshi Tanahashi, is past his prime for sure. But an aged Hiroshi Tanahashi is still one of the best in the world, and he’s still VERY much a threat. He’s taking the G1 Climax just one match at a time, and Tana is more than capable of winning any one match.
  • Will Ospreay: The Aerial Assassin. The Commonwealth Kingpin. Ospreay is coming off of a heartbreaking failure to regain his US Title at Forbidden Door, but he’s still potentially the most entertaining wrestler alive right now, and he’s a strong contender for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship. Getting that title back from his old CHAOS stablemate is a huge priority for the BIlly G.O.A.T., and he can’t squander this chance.
  • Tomohiro ishii: The Stone Pitbull is a guaranteed banger alert, but he’s got more years behind him than in front of him. Time is running out, and Ishii has to bite his very hardest if he wants to move past being a good match generator and turn into a G1 Climax winner. 141 141 141 141 141
  • Yota Tsuji: Fresh from excursion, it’s everybody’s favourite Kirk alt! Yota Tsuji just graduated from Young Lion status, and it’s sink or swim for him, because he’s getting dropped straight into the shark tank! If he pulls this off, it'll be one of the greatest rookie campaigns ever. Can he, though?
  • Zack Sabre Jr.: FRONT MAN. TECHNICAL WIZARD. Lanky fucking God can turn anybody on the NJPW roster into a pretzel, but he hasn’t yet turned himself into a World Champion. The leader of TMDK is looking to finally win a G1 Climax, and this may very well be his year.
  • Shota Umino: Shooter is also a pretty recent graduate, and he has the Blackpool Combat Club stamp of approval. However, he’s still pretty unseasoned, and he hasn’t yet been claimed by a faction. He’s young, he’s on his own. It’s him against the world, but smart money might not be on the world.
  • Minoru Suzuki: The King is fresh off of his very first run with the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, and he’s not planning on waiting as long for his second reign as he did for his first. He looked very, very dangerous when he had the belt, to a shocking degree. Maybe he can keep it up.
  • Taichi: He was a Dangerous Tekker. He has golden pipes. He kicks real hard. Taichi is one of the most underrated talents in the entire company. Boasting World Champion level skill along with Eurovision winner calibre singing ability, nobody wants to step into the ring with Taichi. This is his fucking year, man. It’s happening.
  • Orange Cassidy: AEW wasn’t content with sending just one surprise this year, so they sent two! The King of Sloth Style nearly took the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship off of Minoru Suzuki, and that earned him a spot among the twenty wrestlers warring for the main event of Wrestle Kingdom. “Freshly Squeezed” is pretty calm about it all, though.
​

G1 CLIMAX 33

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A Block:
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Night One
Block A is a stacked block, and Night One’s main event could potentially end up being the match of the tournament, because Kazuchika Okada is taking on none other than Bryan Danielson! The two of them put on a show, and end up going the distance! This means that they’re both middle of the road with a point each, and Shingo, Finlay, Tama and Cobb each nab two points.
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Night Three
After beating KENTA on Night One, Tama Tonga goes for revenge on another Bullet Club member in David Finlay. However, Finlay manages to take advantage of his aggression and cheat to win, taking the top spot with four points. Okada and Bryan each improve to three points, defeating EVIL and Narita, respectively. KENTA defeats Cobb to get on the board. EVIL, Narita and Yano all have zero. Shingo gets a win, and he’s tied with Finlay for first.
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Night Five
Ren Narita gets his first two points, toppling Yano, while Okada and Bryan both hit five, and Shingo and Finlay both hit six. Yano and EVIL are still scoreless, and Jeff Cobb is very frustrated with the fact that he has gone 1-2 so far, as have KENTA and Tama Tonga.
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Night Seven
EVIL manages to get on the board with a win over Tama Tonga, due to BC interference. Yano gets on the board too, beating Jeff Cobb, and Mr. Athletic tears up the ringside area in response! Bryan gets through Shingo, and Okada gets through Finlay, so the men that drew on Night One are both tied for the lead now. Ren Narita defeats KENTA, a sign of the changing of the guard in puro.
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Night Nine
Bryan defeats EVIL to take the top spot in the block with nine points, and Shingo is close behind, beating Finlay to keep the BC leader at six and improving to eight himself. Jeff Cobb finally breaks his string of bad luck, beating Okada, keeping the champion at seven! Tama also beats Narita, and KENTA runs through Yano.
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Night Eleven
Yano tricks Tonga and defeats him, making it to four points. Cobb builds on his momentum from last week, taking a huge win over Takagi, and Bryan expands his lead by beating David Finlay! Okada defeats KENTA, and EVIL gets passed Narita. Bryan sits alone at eleven points, Okada isn’t far behind with nine, and Shingo is in third with eight. Cobb and Finlay have six each, and the rest of the field sits at four.
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Night Thirteen
EVIL defeats Yano, and Cobb, after a shaky start, hits eight points with a win over David Finlay, who’s on a skid after a great start. Shingo breaks double digits, beating Tama Tonga, and Okada gets past Narita to do the same, hitting eleven. However, KENTA, who has history with Danielson, manages to upset The American Dragon! We’ve got a tie for first place between Okada and Bryan, with Shingo right on their tails!
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Night Fifteen
It’s the penultimate night of A Block action, and with the race being super tight, a win is super important. Jeff Cobb defeats EVIL, hitting ten points. A great run for the Hawaiian, but Bryan Danielson hits thirteen with a win over Tama Tonga, so Cobb is mathematically eliminated. Okada also hits thirteen with a victory over Toru Yano, and Shingo Takagi gets through Ren Narita to remain in the fight! Also, David Finlay hits eight points after beating KENTA. Okada and Bryan are tied for first, thirteen points each, and Shingo has a cool twelve.
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Night Seventeen
It’s the final night of A Block. KENTA beats EVIL, Cobb beats Tama Tonga, and Ren Narita beats David Finlay, all nice consolation victories. Bryan Danielson faces Toru Yano, and seems poised to run through him…BUT YANO MANAGES TO CLAIM ANOTHER SOUL IN THE BLACKPOOL COMBAT CLUB, BECAUSE HE OVERWHELMS DANIELSON WITH HIS SHENANIGANS AND BEATS HIM! BRYAN IS OUT! It all comes down to Okada vs. Shingo, Okada hoping to get one step closer to choosing his own Wrestle Kingdom opponent. The match hits 29 minutes, a draw would mean a Rainmaker win…BUT SHINGO MANAGES TO HIT HIM WITH A MADE IN JAPAN! COVER! ONE…TWO…THREE! SHINGO TAKAGI HAS MADE THE G1 FINALS!
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B Block:
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Night Two
We kick things off in style, with Orange Cassidy showing off his skills to the Japanese crowd, defeating Yota Tsuji. Will Ospreay kicks off his campaign by beating Shota Umino, and Zack Sabre Jr. does the same, beating one of his former rivals in Tomohiro Ishii. Taichi gets past recent IWGP World Heavyweight Champion Minoru Suzuki, and in the main event, Tetsuya Naito just barely manages to get a win over The Ace, Hiroshi Tanahashi.
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Night Four
Tanahashi gets on the board with a victory over Shooter Shota, while ZSJ beats OC in an absolute banger. Ospreay also picks up a win, over Ishii, and Yota Tsuji pulls up a huge upset, beating Minoru Suzuki! In the main event, Naito can’t get past Taichi, and the man with the golden voice is tied for first, with ZSJ and Ospreay.
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Night Six
Shota Umino knocks Taichi back down to Earth, while Will Ospreay defeats Minoru Suzuki, keeping him at zero points. Orange Cassidy beats Tomohiro Ishii, and Hiroshi Tanahashi is able to get past Yota Tsuji. In the main event, ZSJ and Naito have a close match, but in the end, The Front Man forces Naito to pass out. ZSJ and Ospreay are alone at the top now.
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Night Eight
Umino manages to beat Orange Cassidy, and Taichi hits six points with a win over Yota. Ishii beats Suzuki to get on the board, and Suzuki STILL has no points, the only one that doesn’t have any! Tanahashi beats Sabre with a High Fly Flow, and Naito hands Ospreay his first loss, so we have a four way tie for first!
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Night Ten
Ishii beats Tanahashi, and that could be a costly loss for The Ace. Shota Umino hands Minoru Suzuki YET ANOTHER LOSS, and ZSJ makes quick work of Yota Tsuji. Tetsuya Naito gains ground in this tightly-contested block by getting past Cassidy in one of the most fun matches of the tournament, and Will Ospreay beats Taichi to keep his lead. Ospreay and ZSJ sit alone at eight points, while Shota Umino, Tetsuya Naito, Hiroshi Tanahashi, and Taichi are all in second place with six. Tomohiro Ishii has four, Yota Tsuji has two, and Minoru Suzuki is STILL at zero, somehow. Perhaps the World Title reign took a lot out of him.
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Night Twelve
Naito gets a big win over Shota to stay in the thick of things, while Tanahashi keeps Suzuki scoreless and improves to eight points. Yota gets past Ishii, doubling his total, while Orange Cassidy makes Taichi’s chances at winning this block very slim, beating him in a fun match. In the main event, Will Ospreay knocks Zack Sabre Jr. out with a Hidden Blade to take sole ownership of the top spot!
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Night Fourteen
Zack Sabre Jr. bounces back with a big win over Shooter, and Tetsuya Naito stays alive, defeating the already very worn-down Minoru Suzuki, still winless. Will Ospreay gets past Yota Tsuji, maintaining the top spot, and Taichi has an absolute banger with Ishii, with Taichi coming out on top. Finally, Orange Cassidy upsets The Ace, beating Tanahashi with three consecutive Orange Punches!
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Night Sixteen
In a battle of the young guns with rhyming first names, Yota beats Shota. Both have six points. Orange Cassidy gets past Minoru Suzuki, getting his win back after their match during Suzuki’s title reign, which seems so far back now. ZSJ beats his old tag partner, Taichi, but Tetsuya Naito falls to Tomohiro Ishii! In the main event, between Tanahashi and Ospreay, Ospreay nearly gets the job done, but Tana pulls it out of the fire and beats him with a High Fly Flow! The standings going into the final night of B Block action are as follows: Will Ospreay and Zack Sabre Jr. are both at twelve. Tetsuya Naito, Hiroshi Tanahashi and Orange Cassidy are all at ten. Taichi sits at eight, and Shota Umino, Tomohiro Ishii and Yota Tsuji have six each. Way behind is Minoru Suzuki, still sitting a big ol’ goose egg. Zero.
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Night Eighteen
We head into a final night with endless possibilities, and with so many potential winners, almost every match matters. Up first, a match that doesn’t matter! Shota Umino defeats Tomohiro Ishii, ending his G1 Climax run with a solid eight points. Taichi gets by Hiroshi Tanahashi, eliminating Tana. Both end with ten. Tetsuya Naito faces Yota Tsuji, and after defeating him, improves to twelve points. He’s currently locked in a three-way tie with Zack Sabre Jr. and Will Ospreay, each man having a win and a loss against the other two. Zack Sabre Jr. faces his old stablemate, Minoru Suzuki…AND SUZUKI BEATS HIM! AFTER A WINLESS EIGHT MATCHES, MINORU SUZUKI PREVAILS ON HIS FINAL NIGHT, AND NOW, IT’S ALL UP TO WILL OSPREAY! If Ospreay wins, he wins the block, but if he loses, he enters a very complicated tie with Orange, Naito and Sabre. In a rematch from the first Forbidden Door, Ospreay and OC outperform their first match…BUT THE RESULT IS THE SAME! THE COMMONWEALTH KINGPIN HAS WON THE B BLOCK! It’s going to be Will Ospreay vs. Shingo Takagi in the G1 Climax Finals!
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NJPW G1 Climax 33: Finals - August 13th, 2023
Shingo Takagi vs. Will Ospreay - G1 Climax Finals
This is it. The winner of this match goes on to the main event of Wrestle Kingdom 18. This isn’t the first time that the three men involved with the Wrestle Kingdom main event have been Kazuchika Okada, Will Ospreay and Shingo Takagi, but this time, there’s no two night event. Only one man can get that main event slot. Will it be The Commonwealth Kingpin? Will it be The Last Dragon? Two former champions, two insane G1 runs, two very worthy competitors. Let’s get this started.
This match is absolutely insane, because like, look at the two guys that are in it. Shingo uses his size advantage to batter Will from pillar to post, and Will has to tap into the agility that we see a little bit less of these days. He knocks Shingo out of the ring with a Hidden Blade, but when he goes for a Suicide Dive, he just bounces right off of Takagi! He picks Ospreay up and hits him with a brutal Uranage. This is a very, very good match, but unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, and this one does when Takagi has Ospreay badly hurt. He waits for the former Aerial Assassin to get to his feet, before charging forward with a Pumping Bomber! But Ospreay reverses with a standing Spanish Fly! Rolls through! Hooks the arms! LIFTS SHINGO UP! STORMBREAKER! HE MAKES THE COVER! ONE…TWO…THREE! WILL OSPREAY IS GOING TO WRESTLE KINGDOM!
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NJPW Burning Spirit: Night Four - September 6th, 2023
Jeff Cobb vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
Jeff Cobb managed to defeat Kazuchika Okada in the G1, so he has earned this shot at the greatest prize in the sport. Cobb recreates his game plan from the match, using his size to bully the champion, but Okada targets the leg a lot more than he did in the G1 Climax, slowing the Hawaiian right down. There’s a close call for The Rainmaker at one point, with him having to elbow his way out of an attempt at the Tour of the Islands, but the leg work pays off, especially when Cobb almost goes out when locked in the Red Ink. Cobb can barely stand when Kazu knocks him out with The Rainmaker…before clocking him with a Hidden Blade, a message to Cobb’s stablemate, Will Ospreay.
Kazuchika Okada def. Jeff Cobb in 19:13 to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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NJPW Royal Quest: Night One - October 7th, 2023
Shingo Takagi vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
It’s the main event of Night One of Royal Quest, and G1 finalist Shingo Takagi did manage to beat Okada in the G1, so he’s got a chance to rectify his loss in the Finals. Shingo puts Okada through hell during this match, fighting like a man possessed, but Okada is just too good right now. He manages to roll through a Made In Japan, and counters an attempt at a Pumping Bomber with perhaps his most perfectly-timed Dropkick ever. Despite The Last Dragon’s best efforts, the result was a foregone conclusion from the moment the bell rang. Tonight, Kazuchika Okada was unbeatable, and he put Shingo down with a Rainmaker. Tonight was Kazuchika Okada’s no-hitter, his flu game, his Ernie Nevers forty-bomb. Can he recreate this perfect form on January 4th?
Kazuchika Okada def. Shingo Takagi in 24:51 to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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NJPW Royal Quest: Night Two - October 8th, 2023
Tetsuya Naito vs. Will Ospreay (c) - G1 Climax Briefcase
The Ungovernable One had himself a very, very good G1 Climax run, coming just two points short of winning his block. However, he did get a win over the eventual block winner, and tournament winner for that matter, so tonight, the leader of United Empire has to put his January 4th contract on the line against the most popular man in the company. However, Ospreay is the most popular man in the building tonight, as he’s in his home country of England (gross)! The Commonwealth Kingpin is able to feed off of the energy in the building tonight, and the crowd reaches a fever pitch when Ospreay throws his elbow pad into the crowd, hits Naito with a front-facing Hidden Blade, and picks him up for the Stormbreaker! Ospreay plants the leader of LIJ and pins him! He can celebrate with his rotten-toothed, ugly, little-brained countrymen tonight! (PJ, Misery and OWD are three of the good ones don’t worry about it)
Will Ospreay def. Tetsuya Naito in 29:00 to retain the G1 Climax Briefcase
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NJPW Battle Autumn: Night Ten - October 29th, 2023
Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Will Ospreay (c) - G1 Climax Briefcase
There was one man other than Tetsuya Naito that managed to get a win over Will Ospreay during the G1 Climax, and that man was The Ace himself, none other than Hiroshi Tanahashi. Perhaps the most loved man in the company, Tanahashi also had a solid tournament, and he looks to turn back the clock tonight and secure himself a spot in the main event of Wrestle Kingdom. Unfortunately for The Ace, Will Ospreay is already in Wrestle Kingdom form, and he doesn’t fall to the High Fly Flow like he did on Night Sixteen. Instead, he gets his knees up and quickly hits a brutal Hidden Blade to pick up the win! It’s official! The main event of Wrestle Kingdom 18 is set in stone, and the competitors have two months to prepare themselves.
Will Ospreay def. Hiroshi Tanahashi in 20:19 to retain the G1 Climax Briefcase
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NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 18 - Press Conference Run
Leading up to the biggest show of the year, The Ojiisan of Them All, NJPW of course does a run of promotional press conferences. Throughout those press conferences, Kazuchika Okada does admit that Will Ospreay will be a formidable opponent, but sort of brushes him off as well. He talks about how this Wrestle Kingdom isn’t a forum for Will Ospreay to complete his arc, it’s just happening to serve as a reminder that Kazuchika Okada is the best to ever do it. It’s going to be yet another coronation for him. Will Ospreay had his Wrestle Kingdom main event against him, and he failed to defeat The Rainmaker. He failed to defeat Kenny Omega. He failed to defeat Bryan Danielson. Some things never change, and this is one of them. The result is set in stone. It’s as sure as the wind, the tides…and the rain.
Will Ospreay, of course, has a very different point of view. He says that all of his losses hurt, but they always shape him into a better wrestler, and now he’s the best he has ever been. Kazuchika Okada is not the main character here, he’s not the story. All eyes are on Will Ospreay, and what he’s going to do. The eyes of the world are watching Wrestle Kingdom not to see Kazuchika Okada, but to see the climax of the tale of Will Ospreay. “Every good story has an antagonist. I’m David, and you’re Goliath. On January 4th, it’s my job to size you up, take aim, and put my best shot clean through your fuckin’ head. I may be The Commonwealth Kingpin, but I’ve still got a little bit of Assassin in me. I don’t miss, baby.”
​
NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 18 - January 4th, 2024
Will Ospreay vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
After a tremendous show, we have finally reached the main event of the evening. Will Ospreay, The Commonwealth Kingpin, walking in as the challenger against his former stablemate, his white whale, the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion, Kazuchika Okada. The bell rings, and there’s a moment of calm. The two competitors stare at each other before locking up. Okada grabs a Headlock immediately, but Ospreay backs him into the ropes. He backs away immediately, a clean break. They lock up again, and this time, Okada backs Will into the ropes, and does his patented mocking pats on the chest. Ospreay isn’t having it, though, and he slaps the champion! Okada laughs, nodding his head, and he returns to the middle of the ring.
They each put one hand out, and Okada immediately ducks under the challenger’s arm, grabbing a Wristlock. He wrenches on the arm a little bit, and Will plays it safe, doing a forward roll to alleviate the pressure. Ospreay goes behind and grabs a Hammerlock, forcing Kazuchika to cartwheel out of it. The champion throws Ospreay with an Arm Drag, and Will rushes at him! Okada tries to trip him, but Ospreay jumps over and runs the ropes. Okada GOES FOR A DROPKICK! Ospreay stops dead in his tracks, the champ crashes into the mat! Ospreay tries to capitalize WITH A RUNNING SHOOTING STAR PRESS! OKADA ROLLS AWAY! Both men grab their mid-sections after failed attacks and restart once again.
It looks like they’re going to lock up one more time, but the challenger fakes the collar-and-elbow and instead goes behind Okada, hitting a textbook Neckbreaker! He rolls through, clutching The Rainmaker’s neck in a sort of Guillotine position, only to throw him through the middle ropes to the outside! Ospreay runs the ropes! DIVES OUT! TOPE CON HILO! OKADA GOES DOWN, AND OSPREAY IMMEDIATELY PICKS HIM UP, LOOKING TO LAUNCH HIM INTO THE BARRICADE! Okada, still loopy, reverses, and heaves Will over the barricade! Backs up! RUSHES FORWARD! DIVING DROPKICK OVER THE BARRICADE! Okada soaks in the cheers as a result of that tremendous sequence, and returns to the ring. Ospreay staggers back to the ring as well, BUT GETS BLINDSIDED BY A TOPE CON HILO FROM OKADA! IT’S RARE THAT HE BUSTS THAT OUT!
It’s been all Okada for the past couple of minutes, and he follows Will out, just to throw him back inside. Kazu smells blood in the water, and he decides to lock in RED INK! IT’S TIGHT, AND THE PAIN WAKES OSPREAY UP! HE’S GRABBING HANDFULS OF THE CANVAS, AND MANAGES TO DRAG HIMSELF ALMOST ALL THE WAY TO THE ROPES, BUT OKADA RELEASES THE HOLD AND DRAGS HIM BACK TO THE CENTRE! THIS TIME, HE APPLIES THE MONEY CLIP! EVERYBODY HATES THIS MOVE, AND WILL OSPREAY MUST BE HATING IT MORE THAN ANYBODY RIGHT NOW! However, The Commonwealth Kingpin begins fighting to his feet! Kicks to the shins! Breaks free! To the body! To the head! KAWADA KICKS, OKADA IS ROCKED! A ROLLING THUNDER KICK KNOCKS HIM DOWN! COVER! ONE…TWO…AND A KICKOUT!
Ospreay picks his opponent up, before going for a Spin Kick! Okada ducks it and rolls away to create distance, before going for a Lariat! Ospreay ducks that and does a roll of his own! He charges at Okada, running up his shoulders like a ramp and flipping off, before going for an Enzuigiri! It’s ducked, and Okada goes for an Ankle Lock! Ospreay rolls, sending Okada rolling too, and Ospreay goes for a takedown, but he eats a knee! Okada looks for a Discus Elbow! Ducked, and Ospreay hits a BIG Superkick! SPRINGBOARD! OSCUTTER! OKADA CATCHES HIM, AND HE’S LOOKING FOR A RAINMAKER! RIPCORD! ANOTHER SUPERKICK TO ESCAPE! GOES FOR THE OSCUTTER AGAIN! THIS TIME IT WORKS! COVER! ONE…TWO…TH-KICKOUT!
Ospreay doesn’t really know what to do at this point, so he falls back on his roots. The former Aerial Assassin climbs to the top rope! JUMPS OFF! 630 SPLASH! NO, OKADA MOVES AT THE LAST SECOND, SO OSPREAY ROLLS THROUGH, NARROWLY AVOIDING CATASTROPHE! Okada lunges at him AND SENDS HIM FLYING WITH A SHOTGUN DROPKICK! Picks him up! GERMAN SUPLEX! OSPREAY FLIPS THROUGH! DUCKS A LARIAT! SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT! BUT THE RAINMAKER CATCHES HIM AND PLANTS HIM WITH A SPINNING TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER! COVER! ONE…TWO…NO! OKADA ISN’T FINISHED, HE PICKS OSPREAY UP AGAIN! RAINMAKER! RIPCORD! CONNECTS! THAT’S IT! COVER! ONE…TWO…THRE-NOOOOOOOOO!!! WILL OSPREAY JUST KICKED OUT OF THE RAINMAKER!
Kazuchika Okada is shocked, not to mention angry, and he starts to stomp on his adversary! Kicks right at the downed Ospreay’s skull! Okada lifts him to his feet, and Will can barely stand. The champion just begins slapping him! But that does nothing but wake Ospreay up! He starts slapping back! This is a battle of slaps, and Ospreay THROWS A SPINNING BACKFIST! It lands flush! Okada is wobbling! OSPREAY RUNS TO THE TOP ROPE! TOP ROPE OSCUTTER! HE EATS A DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! OKADA PICKS HIM UP, AND HE GOES FOR A DISCUS RAINMAKER! BUT OSPREAY, ON PURE INSTINCT, REVERSES WITH A SPANISH FLY! LIFTS HIM TO HIS KNEES AND RUNS THE ROPES! HIDDEN BLADE, THAT SOUNDED LIKE A GUNSHOT! PICKS HIM UP! HOOKS THE ARMS! LIFTS HIM ABOVE HIS SHOULDERS! STORMBREAKER! HE MANAGED TO HIT IT! COVER! ONE…TWO…THREE!!! WILL OSPREAY HAS DONE IT! IN THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLE KINGDOM 18, HE HAS ONCE AGAIN BECOME THE IWGP WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION! HE TRULY IS THE KINGPIN!
Will Ospreay def. Kazuchika Okada in 31:27 to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
submitted by KirkHammettJigsaw to FantasyBookingElite [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 05:10 KirkHammettJigsaw Booking the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship From Wrestle Kingdom 17 Part I Can We Give Joshua Epps The World Title?

Booking the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship From Wrestle Kingdom 17 Part I Can We Give Joshua Epps The World Title?
Divas Title.
The IWGP World Heavyweight Championship. It doesn’t matter that it doesn’t have the same lineage as the belt that came before it. It doesn’t matter that it killed the Intercontinental Championship and buried it deep into the ground to rot. It doesn’t matter that it looks like if the Divas Championship got railed by the Big Gold and spit out a little premature bastard failed abortion six excruciating months later. It’s still one of the most prestigious championships in professional wrestling. Just look at the lineage. Kota Ibushi. Will Ospreay. Shingo Takagi. Kazuchika Okada. Jay White. Kazuchika Okada again. Ignore what happened after that please, that doesn’t need to happen and it won’t happen here.
It’s one of the most sought-after belts, and yet the current champion is SANADA. All of that talent vying to hold that gold, and the main event scene is SANADA and Yota “Good But Not There Yet” Tsuji. Nobody wants to see that, and it certainly doesn’t help the perception of the championship. That’s what I’m here for. A championship with a lineage like that deserves much, much better, and so that’s what I’m going to try and give it. We start back at the beginning of the year, at Wrestle Kingdom 17, with The Rainmaker and The Switchblade going to war in our main event.
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NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 17 - January 4th, 2023
Kazuchika Okada vs. Jay White (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
We just came off of one of the best matches in pro wrestling history, Kenny Omega vs. Will Ospreay, and White and Okada must do battle on a canvas now stained with blood, a testament to what kind of stuff these competitors must do to attain glory. It’s a great match, very counter-heavy, as both men are some of the best reversal artists that the sport has ever seen. Jay White wrestles like his usual sneaky self, but there’s just a foreboding sense that his time in NJPW is up. His glass jaw takes one too many dropkicks and he starts to fade. King Switch attempts to reverse a Rainmaker with a Blade Runner, but Okada muscles out of the counter, hits a Discus Rainmaker, and then follows it up with the real thing to seal the deal and take the title!
Kazuchika Okada def. Jay White in 33:03 to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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NJPW New Year Dash!! - January 5th, 2023
Kazuchika Okada and Kenny Omega vs. United Empire (Will Ospreay and Aaron Henare)
Before this match, Ospreay is in the ring, bandage on his head, ready to take it easy in a pedestrian tag as he casually talks to Henare. Okada steps into the ring, and then his surprise tag partner’s music hits. The moment that Devil’s Sky begins blasting through the arena speakers, the look on The Commonwealth Kingpin’s face changes immediately! Okada and Omega, members of perhaps the greatest feud in wrestling history, are teaming together tonight! Ospreay wants his revenge for the loss last night, and he gets in Kenny’s face. The Cleaner responds by putting his recently won IWGP United States Championship right in his face.
The match is fun, as Okada and Ospreay, like always, have some very fun sequences. They look pretty evenly-matched, and Henare also looks pretty damn good against two of the best wrestlers of all time. Outmatched, sure, but good. Better than expected, even if he isn’t the other three men in the match. Ospreay constantly tries to go after Kenny, but the Best Bout Machine always tags out like a dickhead. He’s not letting Will get his revenge that easy. At one point, Ospreay lets his anger get the best of him and he knocks Omega off the apron, before hitting a beautiful dive, and continuing to beat on him outside!
The downside of Ospreay’s reckless attack, however, is that it leaves Henare all alone in the ring with the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion. Aaron shows some heart, but heart don’t mean shit when you’re up against Kazuchika Okada. Okada eventually gets the better of him, and has him in position for a Rainmaker. However, Kazu shakes his head, basically saying that The Artist Formerly Known As Toa Henare isn’t even worth a Rainmaker! He transitions into The Money Clip, locking it tight right in the middle of the ring, and Henare eventually has no choice but to quit! Okada and Omega pose cockily in the ring with their respective titles, seemingly carrying a little bit of extra swagger into the new year.
Kazuchika Okada and Kenny Omega def. United Empire in 14:36
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NJPW Wrestle Kingdom 17 In Yokohama Arena - January 21st, 2023
Kazuchika Okada and Togi Makabe vs. Kaito Kiyomiya and Yoshiki Imamura
This match is pretty pedestrian at first. Of course, like in real life, shit gets crazy fast. Makabe tags out after a fun sequence with Kaito, and Kaito brings in Imamura. Imamura isn’t exactly a top level guy, and Okada gets the better of him. He starts challenging Imamura to wake up, slapping him in the face and locking him in a Chinlock, and Kiyomiya sees this as disrespect, which brings him into the ring. He kicks Okada hard in the head, which leads Okada to brawling with him on the outside! The fight devolves, and the two men kick the shit out of each other while Makabe and Imamura try to play peacekeeper. The match is called off as Okada and Kiyomiya get pulled away from each other.
No Contest after 6:35
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NJPW Road to The New Beginning: Night Five - January 30th, 2023
On the post-show press conference, after CHAOS, Taguchi and Tanahashi take a loss to Los Ingonerables de Japon, Kazuchika Okada speaks to the media. He gets asked about his small change in attitude as of late. The dismissiveness towards Aaron Henare, the way he threw around Yoshiki Imamura. It almost seems like he’s been giving the next generation the cold shoulder. Given this, how does he respond to young stars racking up wins on this tour, such as Ren Narita? Okada sort of shrugs it all off. He says that it feels weird that all of the names he usurped to get to the top are beginning to die off, and now HE’S the veteran. He’s been waiting for the next Okada, and nobody has come along yet. Why are we talking about Ren Narita getting a win on the undercard, when Shingo Takagi just pinned YOH to win the match tonight? He thinks that Takagi looked dangerous tonight, and Okada wants to face him at The New Beginning in Osaka.
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NJPW The New Beginning in Osaka 2023 - February 11th, 2023
Shingo Takagi vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
Shingo Takagi had a good string of Road To shows leading up to the event, being responsible for every LIJ win, and it earned him this match tonight, a rematch of Wrestle Kingdom 16’s main event. This one is an incredible battle, Shingo doing his absolute best to come back from the KOPW level and get back to being at the very precipice of the company. Unfortunately for The Last Dragon, though, Kazuchika Okada is in rare form, and after suffering through a fair share of huge Lariats, Okada hits a Spinning Tombstone and follows it up with a devastating Rainmaker to close out this absolute belter of a main event.
Kazuchika Okada def. Shingo Takagi in 32:07
After the match, Ren Narita comes out and confronts Okada! He says that he racked up just as many wins as Shingo leading up to tonight’s show, and yet the champion completely snubbed him and didn’t even entertain the possibility of defending against him. Why? Is it because he’s young? Okada says that it’s because he’s simply not ready, but if Narita wants to learn exactly how unready he really is, then he can face Okada at Battle In The Valley. The match is set, and the young Ren Narita will have the biggest match of his career as he tries to shock the world and take the belt off of The Rainmaker in San Jose!
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NJPW Battle In The Valley - February 18th, 2023
Ren Narita vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
A week after his last defense, Kazuchika Okada is back at it again, putting his IWGP World Heavyweight Title up for grabs against one of NJPW’s most promising prospects, Ren Narita. Narita has looked good as of late, but it’s a whole different ballgame when you’re standing across the ring from the greatest wrestler of a generation, the face of the company. If Narita wants to win tonight, he has to be better than he ever has been.
The young member of Strong Style tries to strike from distance early on and also grapples with The Rainmaker in an MMA-like way. Given Okada’s struggle to defeat Shibata back in the day, we know that this is a bit of a weakness for him. Okada’s getting more and more frustrated as Shibata Jr. continues to pepper him with strikes, and at one point, Narita throws a Palm Strike that lands a bit more like a snap. It’s like you can see Okada’s ego getting wounded, and he snaps. He immediately decks Narita with a Forearm and begins stomping on him.
From there, Okada takes most of the offense, though Ren does show flashes of fire that the Champion has to fight to weather. Kazuchika Okada is NJPW’s ace for a reason, though, and he begins to grind Narita down. Mockingly, he cracks The Son of Strong Style with a Penalty Kick, laughing. He looks right at Minoru Suzuki, Narita’s factionmate in Strong Style, at ringside, and drives Narita into the mat head-first with Suzuki’s finish, the Gotch-Style Piledriver. Finally, he mercifully decides to end things with a Rainmaker. After landing it, instead of going for the pin, he just rests contemplatively, hands on his knees. Then, he impulsively and quickly bursts to his feet, pulls Narita back up, and puts him down with a second Rainmaker! He makes the cover, not even bothering to hook the leg. One…Two…Three!
Kazuchika Okada def. Ren Narita in 28:11 to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
After the match, El Desperado slides into the ring and puts a cold pack on Narita’s neck. Suzuki isn’t concerned with all that. Instead, The King walks up to Okada, hands behind his back, and stares him down. We can’t hear what he’s saying to the champion, but it must be some sort of remark about respect. The lack of respect that Okada showed Narita by hitting him with two Rainmakers. The lack of respect that he showed Shibata and Suzuki himself by ripping their moves. The lack of respect he showed the new generation by implying that they’re below him, and the lack of respect he showed the old generation by not mentioning them whatsoever. Okada doesn’t say a word, he simply raises his championship high in the air and dips out of the ring.
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NOAH Keiji Muto Grand Final Pro-Wrestling Last Love Hold Out - February 21st, 2023
Kazuchika Okada vs. Kaito Kiyomiya
Tonight, Kazuchika Okada is in enemy territory. Keiji Muto’s career is ending tonight, and, as NOAH’s Ace, Kaito Kiyomiya is looking to capitalize on this incredible spotlight by taking out The Rainmaker and cementing himself as the premier champion in all of Japan. The two men have a much more back-and-forth affair than in real life, and with the crowd firmly against Okada, he almost seems to be drowning towards the middle of the match. Kiyomiya gets the nearest fall of the match with a beautiful Lifting DDT from the top rope, and when Okada kicks out, the GHC Heavyweight Champion knees him HARD right to the jaw.
The knee strike bloodies Okada up a little bit, mashing his lips against his teeth. He checks his mouth for blood, and when he notices some, it seems to wake him up a little bit. From there, Kaito, who expended a lot of his energy trying to put the match away earlier, seems like he’s having trouble dealing with a revitalized IWGP World Heavyweight Champion. Okada puts him down with a beautiful Dropkick and smiles, waiting for Kiyomiya to get to his knees. Once he does, Okada rushes forward AND TAKES HIS HEAD OFF WITH A SHINING WIZARD! THAT’S KEIJI MUTO’S FINISH! The crowd seems shocked at this move theft, and Okada picks Kaito up, before planting him with The Rainmaker for the One…Two…Three!
Kazuchika Okada def. Kaito Kiyomiya in 34:46
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NJPW New Japan Cup - Overview
I don’t even really want to touch SANADA’s side of the bracket, but with the crazy fucking push that New Japan is giving him, I don’t despise the idea of him making the finals, so we’ll keep that as is. Let’s talk about the other side, though. The one that David Finlay made it through in real life, though? Nah, let’s not have any of that. Instead, after taking out Yujiro Takahashi in the opening round, Minoru Suzuki also eliminates Finlay in the second. After dealing with two current Bullet Club members, Suzuki faces off with a former one in Tama Tonga. They have a back-and-forth match, but Suzuki reverses a Gun Stun and latches on a Sleeper Hold to secure victory.
The semi-finals end up being a huge test for The King, though. He has to deal with perhaps the greatest member of Suzuki-Gun, his former stablemate, the Front Man of TMDK himself, Zack Sabre Jr. Despite the fact that their alliance is dead, and their character alignments don’t match up anymore, the two still shake hands before the match begins. It’s a very difficult match for both men, because they know each other so well. However, once ZSJ’s submissions get reversed, he has to fall back on his striking, and Suzuki has him beat there. Sabre goes for a PK, gets tripped up, and Minoru drops some ground and pound on him, before lining up and connecting with a PK of his own! He picks the Technical Wizard up and plants him with a Gotch Piledriver for the win! Somehow, Minoru Suzuki has made it to the finals of the New Japan Cup!
In the finals, two men that have scores to settle with Kazuchika Okada have to battle it out. SANADA has tried to defeat The Rainmaker countless times, and has only succeeded once, back in 2019’s G1 Climax 29. Suzuki, on the other hand, also has history with Okada, but his beef with the champion is much more recent, dating back to Battle In The Valley, where the veteran felt that Okada had disrespected STRONG STYLE. Suzuki and SANADA are both weathered from a long, grueling tournament, and it feels like any big move could finish the match. The finish comes when SANADA goes to the top rope and tries for a Moonsault, only for The King to get his knees up and capitalize by driving his opponent into the mat head-first with a Gotch-Style Piledriver! Cover! One…Two…THREE! Against all odds, Minoru Suzuki will face Kazuchika Okada at Sakura Genesis!
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NJPW Sakura Genesis - April 8th, 2023
Minoru Suzuki vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
Kazuchika Okada has been acting a little bit differently, and that means that he has rubbed a few people in the puro world the wrong way. One of those people is Minoru Suzuki, the oldest member of STRONG STYLE, who, after years of villainy, has dedicated himself to helping the next generation of puroresu. Okada embarrassed Ren Narita, Suzuki’s protege, and now The King is here to make The Rainmaker pay. Can he embarrass the champion in return, and collect a prize that has eluded him forever in the process, or will Kazuchika Okada do what he does best and win? The entrances have happened, the announcements have been made, the bell has been rung. None of the talking matters anymore.
They meet in the middle of the ring and engage in the traditional collar-and-elbow tie-up. However, neither man is able to force the other to the ropes! They’re locked in a stalemate right in the centre of the squared circle, both competitors refusing to take a single step back! To move backwards is to concede, even just a little bit, and in a battle of iron wills like this, nobody is willing to concede! Okada tries to knock Suzuki off balance by poking at his knee with his boot, but Suzuki stands his ground and releases his left hand grip to hit the champion in the ribs a couple of times, just looking to chop the tree down slowly and methodically. They both realize that they won’t be able to push the other man to the ropes, so instead of dragging this out, they release the tie-up.
They both re-centre themselves, and after circling The King, Okada goes for a single leg takedown. He almost gets it, but Suzuki remains standing. Minoru takes a couple of swings, but The Rainmaker trips him up and wrenches on the ankle! Suzuki rolls onto his stomach and gets to his feet, and Kazuchika decides to keep him low by moving into a Headlock! Headlock Takeover now, and Suzuki automatically grabs a Headscissors, which doesn’t faze Okada, who breaks and gets to his feet. Suzuki gets up too, and Okada goes for another takedown, but he eats a knee to the head! He’s stunned and pops back to his feet, and Suzuki throws a barrage of slaps! SPINNING CHOP! CHOP TO THE FACE! BIG BOOT! He makes the cover! One…and a kickout, but Okada’s still rocked despite the early kickout!
Okada gets on all fours and starts crawling away, but The King won’t let him get away that easy, and he hits an Elbow Drop to the back of the head! Suzuki transitions right into a nice Bulldog Choke, reminiscent of the other man that Okada is feuding with, Jon Moxley! Okada doesn’t want to stay in this hold for too long, though, so he starts powering to his feet! Lifts Suzuki straight into the air! BACK SUPLEX! Okada gets up, and he wants to put this match away right this instant! Picks Suzuki up! Go-behind! HE’S LOOKING FOR THE RAINMAKER ALREADY! RIPCORD! BUT SUZUKI IS STILL VERY CONSCIOUS, AND HE HITS A BASEMENT DROPKICK ON THE REBOUND TO KNOCK OKADA TO THE MAT!
Suzuki knows that Okada’s overzealousness is a sign that the challenger is getting to him, so he decides to toy with The Rainmaker a bit more. He grabs Okada’s wrist and positions it so that his wrist is folding his fingers into the mat, and he proceeds to grind his boot onto the wrist to attack the fingers! Okada is shrieking in pain, and he fights to a standing position! Suzuki maintains control of his digits though, bending and twisting! Okada can’t withstand the pain anymore, HE GOES FOR A CLOSED FIST PUNCH! SUZUKI DUCKS IT, KEEPS CONTROL OF THE FINGERS, GOES BEHIND, AND PERFORMS A RIPCORD! ONCE OKADA IS EXTENDED, HE SNAPS THE CHAMPION’S FINGERS! SUZUKI LAUGHS AT OKADA’S PAIN, AND THEN KNOCKS HIM DOWN WITH A HEADBUTT! COVER! ONE…TWO…AND A KICKOUT!
Suzuki smells blood in the water, and he takes full mount! The King starts dropping Elbows, and he’s absolutely relentless with these! Okada is covering his head, he can’t cope with these strikes, but Minoru Suzuki doesn’t give a fuck! He stands up AND STARTS STOMPING ON HIS SKULL! OVER AND OVER! PRIDE NEVER DIES, BUT KAZUCHIKA OKADA JUST MIGHT! Blood is leaking down The Rainmaker’s nose, and it seems like that’s exactly where the challenger is aiming! Knee Drop right on the face! Okada has been knocked loopy, and Suzuki drags him to a sitting position. He tells him that he’s responsible for all of this, slaps him in the face, AND RUNS THE ROPES! PENALTY KICK! NO, OKADA KIPS UP AT THE LAST SECOND AND HITS HIS SIGNATURE DROPKICK! RIGHT ON THE BUTTON! COVER! ONE…TWO…AND SUZUKI GETS THE SHOULDER UP!
Okada looks absolutely shocked that he didn’t close things out there, and he gets to his knees and checks for blood. To his horror, his palm is stained red, and he’s ANGRY. He starts laying in stomps of his own, STRAIGHT TO THE SKULL OF MINORU SUZUKI! HE’S SWEARING AS HE STOMPS! DRAGS SUZUKI TO HIS KNEES! GOES TO THE TOP! MISSILE DROPKICK TO THE BACK OF SUZUKI’S HEAD! Okada is still pissed right off, and he drags Suzuki to his feet. Goes behind, poses, RIPCORD, AND HE GOES FOR A DISCUS RAINMAKER! SUZUKI COUNTERS WITH AN INCREDIBLY HARD SLAP, AND OKADA IS STAGGERED! SUZUKI SEES HIS OPENING! KICK TO THE GUT! GOTCH-STYLE PILEDRIVER, IT’S GOOD! HOOKS THE LEG! ONE…TWO…THREE!!! HE ACTUALLY DID IT! AFTER YEARS OF GRINDING, MINORU SUZUKI CAN FINALLY CALL HIMSELF NEW JAPAN PRO WRESTLING’S WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!
Minoru Suzuki def. Kazuchika Okada in 29:23 to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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AEW Dynamite - April 12th, 2023
Orange Cassidy is interviewed by Renee Paquette after a successful defense of his AEW International Championship. She talks about how he’s been so busy lately, and it seems like he’s faced everybody that there is to offer. She asks him what he wants to do next. He thinks for a moment. “I don’t know, really. I’m in CHAOS and that Suzuki guy took the IWGP World Championship from my friend. I think I’ll go for that. Unless, uh, he doesn’t wanna face me. Then I’ll just go home, I guess.” The very on-brand callout by “Freshly Squeezed” is accepted before the night is out, and the match is made for NJPW Collision in Philadelphia!
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NJPW Capital Collision - April 15th, 2023
Tom Lawlor vs. Orange Cassidy (c) - AEW International Championship
The night before challenging for the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, Orange Cassidy does a very Orange Cassidy thing and defends his AEW International Championship against the leader of Team Filthy himself, Tom Lawlor. Minoru Suzuki is on Japanese Commentary for the match, and Cassidy proceeds to have an absolute banger with the former UFC fighter. He eventually manages to put him away with a Beach Break from the middle rope, and Suzuki then comes down to the ring. OC and Suzuki shake hands, but Mr. Citrus can’t take his eyes off of the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship.
Orange Cassidy def. Tom Lawlor in 16:09 to retain the AEW International Championship
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NJPW Collision in Philadelphia - April 16th, 2023
Orange Cassidy vs. Minoru Suzuki (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
This match was supposed to happen on a GCW show before the pandemic, back when Suzuki was a cold-blooded machine and Orange Cassidy was comic relief. Now, both men are champions, and both men are cheered by the fans. They have a very fun match. Early on, Cassidy hits Suzuki with his mock kicks, and The King answers back with some of his own! Orange is younger and faster, and as the match goes on, the more it feels like he MIGHT just get the job done somehow! However, Suzuki starts going after Orange’s ribs, and with how often the International Champion has been competing, they’re already not at a hundred percent. The challenger makes a last-ditch effort and goes for an Orange Punch, but Suzuki lands a Spinebuster, a short PK followed by a Running PK, and then a Gotch-Style Piledriver to close out a banger of a contest.
Minoru Suzuki def. Orange Cassidy in 21:30 to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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NJPW Hirooki Goto 20th Anniversary Event - April 22nd, 2023
STRONG STYLE (Minoru Suzuki and El Desperado) vs. CHAOS (Hirooki Goto and Kazuchika Okada)
Hirooki Goto is, of course, main eventing his own Anniversary Show, but before the match Suzuki asks for a microphone. He talks about the battles he’s had with Goto in the past, including their Hair vs. Hair match back in the day. As a show of respect, he wants to offer Goto a shot at the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship at Wrestling Dontaku, should CHAOS get the win tonight. The two teams have a crowd-pleasing contest, with Suzuki and Okada barely interacting. At the end, though, Goto catches Despy with a GTR. While he pins El Desperado, Okada prevents Suzuki from getting into the ring, levelling him with a Rainmaker that might have connected just a LITTLE bit after the bell. Nevertheless, Hirooki Goto has secured himself a shot at the biggest title in the sport! It’s been a happy Anniversary for him!
CHAOS def. STRONG STYLE in 12:37
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NJPW Wrestling Dontaku - May 3rd, 2023
Hirooki Goto vs. Minoru Suzuki (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
Two NJPW legends do battle in tonight’s main event. Until recently, they were perhaps the greatest NJPW competitors to never win World Title gold for the promotion. Suzuki checked it off the list, and perhaps Goto will do the same tonight. They have an absolute banger of a match, including a chop battle that leaves both of them with bloody chests. Goto has a very impactful moveset, and he tries desperately to fire off moves that could probably shatter Suzuki’s neck at this point, but the champion has him scouted throughout, peppering him with strikes.
Eventually, with Suzuki countering all of his shit, Goto breaks an older move out of his arsenal! He lifts Suzuki up and plants him with the Jigoku Kuruma! Cover! One…Two…AND A KICKOUT! Suzuki is still conscious, somehow, and Goto’s frustration is palpable! With YOSHI-HASHI, his Bishamon tag partner, at ringside cheering him on, Goto picks Suzuki back up and goes to the well again, trying for another Jigoku Kuruma! Suzuki knees his way out of it, landing in perfect position for a Gotch-Style Piledriver! HITS IT! COVER! ONE…TWO…THR-NO! GOTO KICKED OUT, BUT HE’S RUNNING ON FUMES! Suzuki lifts him to a sitting position and runs the ropes multiple times, HITTING A COLOSSAL PENALTY KICK! TAKES HIS BACK! SLEEPER HOLD, AND HE’S ALREADY OUT! RED SHOES HAS TO CALL IT, SUZUKI RETAINS!
Minoru Suzuki def. Hirooki Goto in 25:01 to retain the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
At the post-show press conference, Kazuchika Okada talks about how Suzuki has only faced CHAOS guys since winning the championship. Why not go for the leader! Okada has had his number countless times in the past, and even beat him on Goto’s Anniversary Show, putting him out cold with a Rainmaker. If Suzuki wants to prove himself as a champion, then Okada is the man to face at Dominion. Suzuki responds later on, saying that he already beat Okada, so he HAS proved himself as a champion. However, the reason he wanted to face Okada in the first place was to teach him to respect STRONG STYLE, and obviously that hasn’t happened yet, so he’s happy to run it back. Dominion. June 4th. Osaka-Jo Hall. Suzuki will once again stop the rain.
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NJPW STRONG Resurgence - May 21st, 2023
Kazuchika Okada vs. Wheeler Yuta
Wheeler Yuta, with Jon Moxley at ringside, is looking to get a statement victory against one of wrestling’s top stars and prove that he truly is the best. He puts up a hell of a fight, even out-grappling The Rainmaker! He very nearly manages to get the pinfall victory with The Seatbelt, but Okada barely manages to touch one of the ropes with his boot. Wheeler’s offense ends up dying out after he gets knocked loopy by a Dropkick, and then he takes three consecutive Rainmakers just because Okada wants to prove a point! Of course, Yuta isn’t kicking out of that.
Kazuchika Okada def. Wheeler Yuta in 20:52
Following the victory, Okada poses like a conqueror, foot on the unconscious Yuta’s chest, and this seems to hurt Moxley’s ego. He hops into the ring and kicks Okada’s foot away, talking shit. Okada slaps him, and Moxley immediately takes him down! They're throwing bombs on the ground, and a bunch of officials, security guards and producers rush into the ring to separate the two former World Champions!
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NJPW Dominion 6.4 in Osaka-Jo Hall - June 4th, 2023
Kazuchika Okada vs. Minoru Suzuki (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
The last time these two faced off, Minoru Suzuki pulled off the upset of the year and managed to unseat the ace of New Japan, claiming his very first IWGP World Heavyweight Championship when everybody thought that he was in his New Japan Dad phase. Kazuchika Okada’s ego didn’t appreciate the hit that it took against The King, so after two defenses, Suzuki is giving The Rainmaker another go at things. The opening of the match is void of any respect at all, both men slapping each other in lieu of allowing clean breaks.
Okada is perhaps more aggressive than ever before, but in a way, that plays into the skill set of the Pancrase-hardened champion. He even hits a PK early on in the match, but Kazuchika kicks out of it. After a war that leaves both men with some battle scars, we enter the closing stretch. Suzuki seems to be suffering from the length of the match, while Okada’s cardio is intact. Minoru reverses a Rainmaker by booting Okada in the gut and going for a Gotch-Style Piledriver! Okada kicks his way out of it and throws a wild strike that Suzuki ducks. He goes behind and locks in a standing Sleeper! Okada drops down and backs through Suzuki’s legs, maintaining wrist control, before flipping the champion into Piledriver position! Spinning Tombstone! Picks him up! Ripcord! RAINMAKER! HE CONNECTS! GOES FOR THE PIN! ONE…TWO…THREE! KAZUCHIKA OKADA IS BACK AT THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN!
Kazuchika Okada def. Minoru Suzuki in 33:38 to win the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
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NJPW New Japan Road: Night Two - June 11th, 2023
CHAOS (YOH and Lio Rush) vs. Blackpool Combat Club (Jon Moxley and Claudio Castagnoli)
The BCC is in Japan, and they’re here to send a message to CHAOS. In our second-to-last match of the night, YOH and Lio Rush put up a hell of a fight, with Lio nearly getting the win with a beautiful Frog Splash on Claudio, but the BCC puts them through the wringer. At the end, Moxley plants YOH with a Death Rider, and he’s more than done, but The Sick Guy decides to roll through and bring YOH to his feet, before spinning him around and hitting him with a Rainmaker! He makes the cover and picks up the win, sending a HUGE message to the newly-crowned IWGP World Heavyweight Champion by doing so!
Blackpool Combat Club def. CHAOS in 8:43
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AEW Dynamite - June 14th, 2023
On Dynamite, Wheeler Yuta and Bryan Danielson pick up a victory over the Best Friends, and afterwards, Jon Moxley gets in the ring and grabs a microphone. He talks about how he is a man that never forgets, and he hasn’t forgotten how Kazuchika Okada tried to embarrass the BCC at Resurgence. He has now made it his mission to rip the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship away from The Rainmaker, and show him exactly why the Blackpool Combat Club is NOT the group to fuck with. He gives the microphone back and prepares to leave the ring…until the coin drops.
The crowd loses their shit, Kazuchika Okada is here! Not only that, he’s not on the ramp…he’s behind the Death Rider! Okada spins Mox around and hits him with a Dropkick! Wheeler and Danielson converge on The Rainmaker, and Claudio Castagnoli runs down the ramp, but the Swiss Superman is intercepted by an Orange Punch from CHAOS member Orange Cassidy! Wheeler Yuta is attacked by Trent and his former trainer Chuck Taylor, and Bryan Danielson gets dragged out of the ring by one of his opponents at Forbidden Door, IWGP United States Champion Kenny Omega (they’re in a Triple Threat with Will Ospreay)! Okada picks Moxley back up and puts him out cold with a Rainmaker! Toronto is going to be treated to one hell of a show when Forbidden Door 2 rolls into town, and Moxley vs. Okada is one of the most can’t-miss matches on the entire card!
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AEW Collision - June 24th, 2023
Kazuchika Okada vs. AR Fox
It’s the second edition of Collision, and the night before Forbidden Door 2. Kazuchika Okada has his first ever match on AEW television, against the talented AR Fox. Fox knows that pulling this off would make him one of the biggest stars in wrestling, and he empties the tank early, but after weathering the storm, Okada is able to take advantage of an exhausted AR and hit him with The Rainmaker. However, just to pay Moxley back for his finisher theft on New Japan Road, Okada picks Fox up and plants him with a Paradigm Shift before making the match-winning cover!
Kazuchika Okada def. AR Fox in 11:54
Jon Moxley doesn’t appreciate the disrespect, and he immediately storms out! Okada meets him on the ramp, and it’s hands on the spot! The two men exchange haymakers, leveling each other, not willing to wait for tomorrow night! The crowd here in The Six is loud for this brawl, and officials flood out of the backstage area to stop this! The two men get separated, but they’re giving each other Stone Cold Salutes as they get ushered to the back, obviously from separate sides!
​
AEW x NJPW Forbidden Door - June 25th, 2023
Jon Moxley vs. Kazuchika Okada (c) - IWGP World Heavyweight Championship
We’ve got a certified banger in the cards here, folks, because in one of the most intense feuds of the night, Jon Moxley challenges for Kazuchika Okada’s IWGP World Heavyweight Championship, looking to expand the Blackpool Combat Club’s trophy case even further. It’s Okada’s first defense, and there’s no love lost here, as we don’t see any clean breaks. Instead, each man slaps the other hard across the face, and the early goings of this one quickly devolve into a bit of a brawl. Moxley does his damndest to bring things to the outside, where he has a distinct advantage, and he eventually does, wrecking Okada out there.
However, Okada is a tremendous counter-wrestler, and he manages to reverse a Paradigm Shift attempt into a beautiful Arm Drag, followed by a Dropkick, a German Suplex, a Tombstone Piledriver, and a Discus Rainmaker! That barrage somehow isn’t even to keep Jon Moxley down, but it does turn the tide significantly, and Okada is eventually able to hit a regular version of The Rainmaker to secure the victory, coming out of the match worse for wear, but still the IWGP World Heavyweight Champion.
Kazuchika Okada def. Jon Moxley in 28:59
submitted by KirkHammettJigsaw to FantasyBookingElite [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 05:00 Kazevenikov Cryptid Chronicle - Chapter 30

A special thanks to u/bluefishcake for the wonderful original story and sandbox to play in.
A special thanks to my editors LordHenry7898, RandomTinkerer, Swimming_Good_8507, CatsInTrenchcoats, and KLiCKonthat.
And a big thanks to the authors and their stories that inspired me to tell my own in this universe. RandomTinkerer (City Slickers and Hayseeds), Punnynfunny (Denied Operations), CompassWithHat (Top Lasgun), CarCU131 (The Cook), and Rhion-618 (Just One Drop)
Hy’shq’e Ay Si’am (Thank you noble friends)
Chapter 30: A Promise Kept
Kalai stepped off the shuttle to the Vaida’s headquarters and into a running tackle-hug from Sitry. “Oh Kalai, I could kill you right now! You got to see the Great Barrier Reef in person, you bitch!” Sitry’s cheerful voice was muffled from where she was still buried in her chest. Kalai staggered backwards a pace or two, happy to be back from her whirlwind adventure around Earth with her father.
Naranjo and Papa Rhaxiid were there on the platform to welcome her back too, but their welcomes were more sedate.
“Not to mention you got out of work for half our damn trip. Ugh, it’s so not fair!” Naranjo huffed as Kalai gave him a sisterly hug.
Papa Rhaxiid reached up and chucked her chin before turning to lead the way back inside from the forested platform. “Welcome back, sweet-sprout, we’ve missed you. Come on, we’ll get you settled again and off to work. There’s quite a bit you need to catch up on if you want your credits.”
The chuckles from the twins behind her were full of sibling malice, but she knew how to shut the pair of them up. “Papa Rhaxiid? I’ve got the paper on Biodiversity in the Reef you asked for, along with the dissection report and stomach content analysis of the tuna we caught. I want to put the finishing touches on it and do a final proofread first before I send them to you.” The man turned and gave her a warm smile as they entered the building.
“Good, why don’t you go take your things back up and say hello to Andy? I’ll give you an hour and a half to get freshened up, then I want you to report to Aquarium 12 with Dr. Sor’ansa. You can put your snorkeling practice to work there.” Papa Rhaxiid walked the three of them to the residential elevator. “I’m heading back to my office. Andy’s been requested by Maetro Pae’ella to work the kitchens for something called ‘Bison burgers'. Apparently it’s a type of indigenous bovine that the eastern Bands raise. That and something from Europe called ‘French Fries’.”
Kalai couldn’t help but get excited as she and her siblings piled into the elevator back to their little shared apartment. Sure the food she’d had all over the place was good, but so far nothing had been able to compare to Andy and his Salishian cooking.
“Nerd, I can’t believe you cheated and did work on your vacation." Naranjo broke the silence of the elevator after a little bit and stuck his tongue out at her.
“Spit to windward, you vain little weed. Don’t hate me because I’m awesome.” Kalai’s riposte caused Naranjo to fold his arms and huff. Sitry simply ambushed her with an ear flick.
The elevator door opened to their floor before Kalai couldn’t bear the silence from Sitry any longer. “So, did you bag him yet, you lucky bitch?”
“No she hasn’t!” Naranjo’s singsong mockery of his sister interrupted Sitry’s response. “Papa hasn’t let Sitry even NEAR Andy without one of them around!”
“Rub it in, you snitch, besides, he did kiss me first,” Sitry preened happily as she playfully shoved Kalai’s shoulder.
Kalai pretended to stumble and almost caught Sitry’s foot, but she was just a hair too slow. “Yeah, and then you gave him a black eye, you clod.”
“Will you let it go? It was an accident!”
“It’s not even the only one he got either." Naranjo’s interjection stopped her right in front of their door.
“Wait, what? Who hurt him this time?” Kalai let her bag thunk to the floor as she turned to look accusingly between Sitry and Narny.
Sitry folded her arms and her ears twitched back as she shot a dark look at their door. “He ‘fell down’ yesterday while out at one of the Hatcheries we gave to the Hwatcoms. Mrs. Toloui nearly had a fit! She said she could smell another human on him and that he was covered in blood!”
Narny nodded primly as Kalai tried to process what they were telling her. “WHAT? Did she call out the militia? Track down whoever hurt him?”
“No, and he refused treatment and insisted that no one did it to him! When papa tried to talk to him, Andy said some stupid human macho shit about pain healing and birds liking scars. I don’t know, sometimes humans… they’re frickin’ insane!”
The door shot open and there stood Andy. His left eye was an angry puffy yellow and blue mess, and there were three points on his lips where a dark cinnabar line marked a crack. Kalai and her siblings stood in wide eyed shock at his sudden appearance and the only sound was the music emanating from the common room behind him.
Andy looked up and down at the three without saying a word. He cocked an eyebrow and snagged Kalai’s bag before any of them could react and cleared the doorway for them.
Kalai sputtered at the impropriety but Naranjo and Sitry just shrugged and walked in after Andy. “Femboys, am I right?” Narny whispered to Kalai as he passed. Kalai followed behind and was greeted by the white fluff-ball, Puck, who hopped up and down, whining for attention. She bent down and started scratching his ears and back. While Puck rubbed up against her hands, Andy settled back down at the table where his omnipad was hooked up to a keypad. Her heart started to sink a bit and Kalai shot Sitry a jealous look before the music came to a sudden halt and Andy interrupted the beginnings of her pity party.
“Ok, Kem’ira, I got the pics now and I’m telling you to declare yourself to the farmers first! I guarantee if you tell them you’re with the new DNR and you’re there to kill all the Scotch Broom in their pasture lands, they’ll stop trying to shoot you for trespassing!”
Kalai’s mood jumped up a bit. It’s not that he doesn’t care to see me, he’s in a meeting!
“No, no I’m not coming out to talk this over with them, I’ve got my own work to do! Either you start talking to folks like I showed you how, or ask the militia to give you one of their armored catsuits to wear under your uniform… Uh-huh, good luck." Andy hung up on the call and leaned back as Puck scampered over and hopped up in his lap.
Andy rubbed his temples before shaking his head. He seemed to relax a bit and Puck slid off to follow Sitry to the kitchen. Andy looked over and gave Kalai a happy smile that made her flush. “Welcome back! So how was the land down under? That tuna was fan-frickin’-tastic, if you aren’t sick of seafood I’ll do something fancy with it tomorrow to celebrate your coming back. Can’t tonight though, I got volun-told to be head chef tonight and I… Oh damnit! I’m late! Come to dinner, burgers and fries Indian style tonight. Gotta run!” With that, Andy went dashing out the door with Puck barking and scrambling along after him.
Kalai felt her heart sink back down again, as he left. “Andy I-” She started but he was gone.
“Yeah, it’s been like that for the whole week. The only time we get to hang out is dinner.” Sitry commiserated as she took Kalai’s bag into their room. “On the other hand, we might get to catch up during the family meal tonight.”
The dinner was delicious, though a bit weird. It tasted alright, but there was a certain aftertaste on the sandwich that just didn’t sit right with Kalai. She just couldn’t put her finger on it. The french fries more than made up for it though, and Mama Sakalbi had to hold a science trivia contest to see who got the last little handful.
Kalai and Narny were already silently plotting with each other for their revenge against their sister who had won and refused to share the last few matchsticks when Andy finally joined their table. He was sweaty and he smelled of woodsmoke and french fries. Kalai jumped up and offered him a seat next to her with a nervous smile. He took it gratefully and seemed to sag a bit as he gulped down a glass of water.
“Andy, I think you may be finding your calling as a culinary ambassador,” Mama Aftasia beamed. “A toast to the chef!”
Andy gave a shy smile and looked down as Kalai and the rest of the family gave a hearty ‘Here, here!”
“It’s a simple enough recipe; it’s just using bison instead of cow, that’s all, and I don’t know anyone who’d turn down hand cut fresh fries. It’s kind of hard to screw up.”
“Young man, you are speaking to a woman who found a way to take cold water and dried wumpa flakes and wind up with a Class-4 fire. Cooking has always seemed like ‘blight mysticism’ to me, and these foods? These flavors? Nothing short of a Greenwood miracle in my opinion." Mama Aftasia continued her praise of Andy, which only caused him to shrink even lower in his seat.
“To be honest, I like your salmon better,” Kalai said, and the whole table went silent. Kalai held her ground though, and was rewarded with a tired but genuine laugh from Andy that brought him back out of his shell.
“You know, I do too. My Clan were fisherpeople, not buffalo chasers.” Andy gave Kalai a cheeky grin, which she returned happily, her heart glowing. Mama Aftasia and Mama Sakalbi both blinked in bemusement at Andy’s statement while Sitry just giggled.
“Speaking of which, Andy, I received a call from Elder Alex Hwatcom.” Papa Rhaxiid’s change of subject instantly perked Andy up, and he stared silently, waiting. “He extended an invitation to our family to attend his family gathering this Friday-”
“Alex said that? He used those words?” Andy shook his head in shock as he interrupted Papa Rhaxiid. The table went quiet and everyone held their breath as they looked between the two men.
Papa Rhaxiid adopted as good an impression of the human Elder as he could. “I’d like to extend an invitation for you and your family to be guests at our family gathering this saturday up at the White… something… lodge-”
“The White Ram Lodge?” Andy sat forward, interjecting again as the color drained from his face.
“Yes, that’s the one! I asked if we could bring anything since the last time they hosted us they put on that wonderful spread. He said if we could bring a few salmon for the family, that would be wonderful.”
Andy leaned back and took another sip of ice water before holding the glass to his blackened eye. “Alex Hwatcom… just invited you… to a gathering… and he told you to ‘bring a few salmon’? Do you realize what a huge honor this is?”
Rhaxiid looked from his wives to his children with mild concern. “Um, I thought it was only dinner, but your reaction tells me there’s more significance to this than I originally thought. I was thinking about our stocks of adult Sockeye, but then I remembered in his story how important King Salmon are. Of course, I’d like to defer to you for the choice since you know these animals and the cultural expectations with this invitation better than we do.”
Andy was silent for a moment before he put the glass down. “I’d recommend a ‘hard no’ to all your clone stock!” Now it was the Vaidas’ turn to be shocked, as each of Kalai’s Erbian family’s jaws dropped in synch. Before anyone could say anything, Andy continued, “You need to bring wild-caught. Farm-raised salmon wouldn’t… well we can tell, and you can taste the difference between them. We need to go fishing!” Kalai leaned towards Andy slightly as he lowered his head and started mumbling to himself. She was just able to make out what he was saying to himself as Mama Sakalbi and Mama Aftasia began whispering to each other. “...need to get the Gillnetter out of storage, check what’s running and select the mesh. I’m gonna need a deckhand too.”
Kalai reached a hand out but stopped short of touching him. “Andy?”
He popped up and spoke for the whole table to hear. “I need a shuttle to the mainland and a waiver against the fishing ban. I’ve got to get my boat and the drum ready for sea ” Rhaxiid and Aftasia sputtered in confusion, but Mama Sakalbi had a shadow fall over her, and her ears pulled back.
“Do you mean to say you want to go out on the water? Risk the ecological balance for… dinner?”
Andy looked Sakalbi dead in the eye and gave her a firm nod. “Why don’t you come out and see how we did this before you got here. Think of it as a chance to see the way we’ve fished for the last hundred or so years, and then I can explain the way we used to fish before that.”
The offer snapped Rhaxiid out of his confusion and he brightened. “A learning experience? Wonderful, we’ll make a day of it!” His hands shot out to grab both his wives’ and Kalai could feel the vibrations in the floor from where he was excitedly tapping his feet.
“If you don’t mind hard, smelly work. Uncle Willy always called it ‘the worst desk in the prettiest office.' It’ll be a bit cramped, but I’ve got room on the boat for a few guests and observers; four I think would be ok. She’s a working boat, not a pleasure cruiser,” Andy explained. That sent the whole lot of them excitedly talking among themselves.
Kalai was about to lean in to talk to Mama Aftasia, but Andy caught her attention first. “I don’t suppose you’d want to go back out on the water, given you just got back from pleasure-boating-”
Kalai’s heart nearly jumped out of her chest. “I wouldn’t miss it for my own colony planet!”
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Kalai stood on the pier, bundled in her thermal sailor’s coat. It was still dark and the wind blew from the north in a cold little morning breeze. Kalai took a deep breath and reveled in the smell of the fresh sea air. The soft chattering of Mama Sakalbi’s teeth broke the silence. “It’s a bit chillier than it said it was going to be.”
“The water always does that. It’s never as warm as the lubbers say it’ll be,” Papa spoke as he handed her back her thermos of hot chocolate.
Papa stood next to Kalai and nudged her with his elbow. Even in the dark, Kalai could see him smile up at her and jerk his head at the shivering Erbian. He was also wearing a thermal sailor’s coat, and his hands were stuffed in his pockets to keep them warm, just like Kalai’s. “Landswoman,” he whispered to her and the two of them shared a knowing smile. It was strange, but welcome when she'd told Papa about her upcoming day fishing with Andy, and he’d politely requested to join them. Papa Rhaxiid had graciously given his spot up to accommodate her birth father. Narny was all for it until Andy had explained what they were going to do, but then surrendered his challenge to the fourth guest space, not wanting to go anywhere NEAR anything that could see him come face to face with a Lion’s Mane Jelly. Sitry had done a happy little dance when she found out, but only yesterday had come down with Thistle Fever, and was bundled off to bed by her parents. It left Kalai, Mama Sakalbi, and Papa to accompany Andy on his fishing trip.
The water brushed against the shore behind them quietly. In the gloom, Kalai could just barely make out the outline of the nearest island mountain, but only because the stars had disappeared behind it. It was almost four in the morning, but Kalai had managed a catnap on the shuttle to the empty little lot that had been the boat launch. Aside from the water, the world was silent. Even the breeze made almost no noise and a sense of peace surrounded them. Everything was so calm, Kalai felt like she didn’t have a care in the world.
In the distance, a low rumbling sound of a motor rose from being almost imperceptible to a rolling drum of thunder. From around the point, two green floating lights sped through the darkness, and a spotlight turned on. The beam of light moved jerkily until it came to rest on the pier where they were standing and Kalai started waving her arms. Sakalbi’s omnipad rang, and Andy’s voice shouted over the speaker and the background noise for them to shine a light on the edge of the pier to help him park the boat.
Kalai and Papa moved closer and turned their omnipad flashlights on and waved them as the boat swung gracefully around and glided in alongside them. Kalai caught the rope that flew over the railing of the boat and she heard more than saw Andy moving around on the deck as she tied off on one of the mooring cleats. Several lights clicked on and the deck was bathed in light enough for Kalai to get a clear view of the boat they’d be spending the day on.
Andy hadn’t lied. Kalai saw that this little vessel was a working boat with no frills at all. When he’d told her they’d be going fishing, she’d envisioned something like the charter boat papa had taken her on out of Nantucket. Sporty, fast with a nod to comfort and function. This was not that at all. A giant wheel as wide as Kalai’s outstretched arms that looked like a sideways spool of thread was secured to the deck amidships and dominated the deckspace. Wrapped around it was a fluorescent green tangle with a line of oblong white and yellow corks and rope. There was a covered hatchway sitting behind the drum in front of the raised step to the enclosed cabin. Two large windows let the light out to two children’s bunks, a little table with a booth seat and a raised captain’s chair in front of the helm and engine controls. Andy shut down the engine and that peaceful stillness returned.
“Oway there!” Kalai called, “ship oway! Request permission to come aboard.” Kalai gave the traditional greeting of a Shil’vati sailor.
“Permission granted! Anyone need a stepstool?” Andy finally stepped into the light and Kalai got a look at him. He was wearing a hooded sweatshirt and the same bright orange coveralls she’d seen the fishmongers wearing on their date.
“I wouldn’t mind a hand, Mr. Shelokset.” Papa He’osforos braced a foot on the railing of the boat and Andy pulled him up.
“Just call me Andy, Doc, and welcome aboard. Jackie should be along any minute now with the day’s groceries, and the cabin’s out of the cold. You can get yourself set wherever you find comfortable.” Papa nodded and disappeared around the other side of the wheel moving towards the bow.
Kalai helped Mama Sakalbi into the boat next, and she quickly ducked into the cabin that took up the entire stern section save for a little ledge that ran along the outside. Andy gripped Kalai’s hand and she smiled as he pulled her deftly aboard. The boat rocked a little on its mooring, and Kalai almost fell into Andy, who wordlessly put his arms around her waist to catch her as she lost her balance. She flailed for a moment before she steadied herself against him.
“Gotcha,” Andy smiled, and Kalai could see him flush almost as much as she could feel herself doing as their noses almost touched. Those big dark brown eyes surrounded by white orbs drew her in and she felt she could lose herself in them. Kalai started as Andy danced her around him and moved her towards the cabin door.
“It might be a little cramped for you in there, but the Mary Jean wasn’t built for pleasure boating, she’s a working girl. Sit tight, I gotta check a few things in the back.” Andy patted the railing affectionately before he hopped up and scooted along the outside of the cabin towards the stern. Kalai couldn’t help the little longing groan that came out as he left her there on the little tiny quarterdeck. Her heart was hammering in her chest as half formed fantasies danced at the edges of her mind.
“I saw that, little minnow.” Papa’s voice was soft, but his tone and the sudden broken silence nearly gave her a heart attack.
Kalai could only stammer as her father stared at her with a cocked eyebrow. A thump from the cabin window behind saw an amused Mama Sakalbi daintily sipping at her thermos with her ears twitched forward in interest, staring out at her. “Papa I… he-”
Papa moved carefully around the covered hatchway to stand next to her, leaning back against the cabin window and heaved a sigh. “I must say I’m surprised. This lovely man’s got good clean lines and is very well cared for. It speaks well of his Skipper.”
It took a full minute for Kalai’s brain to process that he was talking about the boat and not Andy. “And the way Andy brought him in smooth in near complete darkness? It gives me confidence in his abilities.”
Kalai breathed a silent sigh of relief and exasperation. Although she was happy to be spending more time with her father, bringing him on what she’d hoped would be a sailing date wasn’t exactly what she’d had in mind for ‘family time’. He wants me to find a nice young man and spend time with him on a boat, but the first chance I get Papa decides to clam-jam me.
From up on shore, the sound and lights of a large human vehicle screeching to a halt heralded the last of their party to arrive. Kalai heard the clomping footsteps coming down the pier and moved to the railing to lend a hand.
“Ahoy Mary Jean! Raggedy Andy, you there?” Kalai stared with wide eyed surprise to see a human female, loaded down with plastic bags and sporting two human weapons on her shoulder. The two of them locked eyes, and while Kalai didn’t understand everything the girl shouted in surprise, she had caught and understood the phrase, “What the fuck?”
“Easy now, they’re my guests, and the one inside is the boss!” Andy appeared on the pier instantly before either Kalai or the woman could react further.
“Ya didn’t tell me we were having pur-” The woman glared at Kalai and her father. She had switched to Vatikre thankfully, but her tone was hostile as she dropped everything but her weapons. “I mean, hwun’eetums, aboard. A gal could get the wrong idea pretty quick in the dark when there’s no warning.”
“Knock it off Jackie. Let’s get the grub aboard and shove off.” Andy picked up some of the bags and took the guns as Kalai offered a helping hand over the railing. “Oh, Kalai, this is Jackie. Jackie? Kalai. That’s her dad over there, Doc He’osforos. He saw and treated Kay Tee a few years back.” Andy jerked his head towards the direction of Kalai’s father as she held out a hand to the human girl. On a quick inspection, she appeared to be about the same age as her and Andy. She had a round face and was about as dark complected as Andy was. She was shorter, only a few inches taller than Papa, but when Jackie grabbed Kalai’s hand to hop up onto the rail, she could feel the strength and the compact muscle hidden by the baggy sweatshirt and pants.
“Wait a minute, did you say Mini-Me over there saw Kay Tee? You’re fuckin’ with me!” Jackie stumbled a bit as she hopped down onto the deck with a loud thunk and advanced on Papa who shrank away at her advance. “You saw li’l Kay Tee? Where the fuck is he? Is he alright? Is he still fighting the good fight?”
“Last I saw, yes, he was ‘fighting the good fight.’” Papa looked over at Andy with a slightly worried expression. Andy smacked the girl in the back of the head, causing her to flinch and she opened the door to the cabin for Andy to go inside.
Jackie rubbed the back of her head and laughed. “Well that’s a little bit of alright, innit? Maybe today’s gonna be a good day after all!”
“Jackie, get suited up and get on the bow. I need a good pair of eyes on the roller horns,” Kalai heard Andy shout from the cabin, followed by a whole lot of thumping and banging from cabinets being opened and closed.
“You got it, ol’ man. We going to your place or mine?” Jackie sidestepped in and opened a tiny little closet and pulled out a set of rain gear that was identical to what Andy was wearing. Kalai collected herself and stood in the doorway next to her father as they both leaned in.
“Mine; Chuck said the Yaw’much are running from the South. We’ll do a set nor’west of Lummi in the Rosario and see if we can get some Fraser Kings,” Andy replied as he turned the engine back on and the vessel roared to life.
“Chuck? Isn’t that one of your cousins? I didn’t know he could keep track of the movements of Salmon, may I ask how he does it?” Mama Sakalbi perked up as she pulled a set of earplugs out of a pocket and inserted them.
Andy prevaricated a bit, looking from Jackie back to Sakalbi then to Kalai and Papa. “I’d rather not answer that-”
“Breakin’ the law, breakin’ the law! Breakin’ the law, breakin’ the law!”
Jackie began singing a human song, and Andy threw her the dirtiest of looks as she finished getting into the orange coveralls. Mama Sakalbi sputtered as Andy shrugged apologetically.
“Make a hole!” Jackie called, and she and Andy came back out as Kalai and Papa made room for them. Andy hopped back onto the dock to cast off while Papa ducked into the cabin.
“Can I help?” Kalai offered as Andy shoved the vessel off and leapt the gap over the black water below.
“You want to be useful? Come forward! I could use an extra set of eyes!” Jackie called back, and Kalai felt a slap on her shoulder from the boisterous human woman.
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Andy stood at the helm, watching Jackie and Kalai as he leaned to get a better view of them past the Net drum. The bow was lifting up again, and the gentle little swells became like speed bumps, jostling them up and down in a predictable bouncing rhythm.
“Are you sure you couldn’t slow down, Andy? It’s a bit rough, don’t you think?” Sakalbi was hanging on to the table and her thermos with a worried expression on her face.
“I could, but we’ll miss the morning set. We want to bomb out the buoy right when the tide changes. If we’re lucky, then we’ll get around seventy or eighty by slack tide this afternoon and call it a day.”
“How do you know where to fish?” Dr. He’osforos was making a good show of standing and maintaining his balance with his hand on the booth.
“Well, there’s two ways you know. The first is you fish the spots your family’s fished since time began. Every family has about two or three different secret spots that we know there’s fish in, and we’re pretty defensive about their locations. The second is by smell. Right now it’s the tail end of the King season, and you can smell them in the water.” Andy turned and saw the incredulity etched on the faces of the two aliens.
“No, I’m serious! King Salmon slime is really pungent, and you can smell them when they’re close to the surface. We get to the fishing spot and take a deep whiff. If we smell them, we’ll set the nets.” Andy laughed at the disbelief on their faces as the GPS on his omnipad beeped and he turned to sail around the last buoy and head for the fishing ground.
“I’ve never noticed that in any of the Kings we’ve raised-”
Andy suppressed a laugh as they caught a larger swell as they left the lee of Lummi Island. Andy reveled in the feeling of weightlessness as the deck rose up and fell out from underneath their feet, leaving everyone suspended for a moment in midair before falling back down. A massive spray of water rose and washed over the deck, drenching Kalai and Jackie, who were still forward. “Cloned and farmed Kings don’t have that same smell. Wild ones smell and taste different, I’m telling you!” Andy pulled back slightly on the throttle as they climbed the next swell. “Brace!” he called as they climbed and fell once again.
There was a look of fear on Sakalbi’s face as she gripped the table for dear life, but to Andy’s surprise, the Doctor looked completely unfazed, and was handling the rise and fall of the deck like an old salt. “You look like you’ve done this before, Doc.”
“I’ve done a stint or two at sea before,” he spoke, in the same tone Andy would have used when trying not to sound too confident, and Andy smiled.
“Kalai keeps talking about loving the sea and sailing. Did you teach her to sail?”
“Yes, me and her mothers. When they were home, we would take the family yacht out in the Vaascon Straits and sail around the Occidiens. Kalai practically spent all her early childhood on a sailboat.”
“And almost every waking moment on one in Junior Academy. I swear you couldn’t dig her out with a trowel when she wanted to go sailing,” Sakalbi managed to add in a word as the boat slowed, and the dramatic rise and fall of the deck slowed with it.
“What about you, Mr. Shelokset, did your father teach you to sail too?”
“I was too young before he passed. My Great Uncle Willy taught me after I came home, and Grandma took me out to the family fishing sites when she wasn’t busy with the Council. For the first two or three years after they let us come home, fishing was the only way to feed our families, but the Militia and the Cambrians would try and sink our boats or arrest us whenever we tried to go out.”
“And that’s why you’re so good at maneuvering your vessel in the dark with no instruments?” Mrs. Vaida had folded her arms, and her voice twinged with that imperious tone she’d had when they’d first met.
Andy huffed a dry laugh. “I did what I had to for me and my people and to survive, Ma’am. I don’t like breaking the law or dodging lasers and gunfire, but there’s a lot of poor families that need to eat.”
The GPS beeped, and Andy gave Mrs. Vaida a slightly defiant look to counter her furrowed brow. “We’re here,” he said as he threw the engine in neutral and opened the cabin door.
Andy walked out and took a deep breath, but all he could smell was the net and the exhaust from the engine. “HEY JACKIE! WE SMELL MONEY?” Andy yelled out as he took stock of the sky. The first signs of sunrise were chasing all but the morning stars away and a light fog was rolling in from the north.
“FUCK YEAH I CAN SMELL ‘EM, ANDY! LET’S BOMB OUT AND GET BREAKFAST GOING!” Jackie looked slightly manic as she smiled brightly. Kalai, on the other hand, looked wet and miserable as she shivered, arms wrapped around herself. Andy gave his cousin a disgusted look as he pieced together what had happened. Every deckhand learned when to duck behind the raised bow and the roller horns that guided the nets so as not to get a faceful of spray when cutting through a swell. It was also a classic hazing trick for Senior Deckhands to let Junior Deckhands learn this the hard way.
Andy moved forward to stand in front of the two of them. Kalai was trying to squeeze her coat dry, but Andy knew it wouldn’t do much good until the sun came out. Jackie at least had the sense to look a little remorseful. “Kalai, why don’t you go sit in the cabin and get out of that wet coat. It’s cold enough out here even for us-”
“No way, Andy. Junior deckhand Kally here wants to impress you and get her dainty soft hands dirty! She’s been bragging about being a sailorwoman and wants to learn to fish ‘your way!” Jackie gave Kalai’s shoulder a wet slap as the poor alien woman went blue. Out of cold or embarrassment, Andy couldn’t tell.
All Andy could do was shake his head and huff. “Ok then! Secure the buoy and sling on my mark. I’ll get us in position!” Andy couldn’t help but chuckle as he heard Jackie start ordering Kalai about. Andy went back into the cabin and looked in the closet/bathroom to see if there was anything hanging up that he could give Kalai. There was only the one rain slicker and a few of Andy’s old sweaters from when he was a lot smaller. Well, looks like I’ll just be cold today. He quickly stripped out of his sweatshirt and grabbed the slicker before throwing a switch on the main control. Dr. He’osforos and Mrs. Vaida threw him quizzical looks as he went back outside wearing less than when he came in. He was down to a sleeveless shirt and his coveralls, and the morning breeze cut right through him and he braced his jaw to keep it from chattering.
“We’re ready to go- Andy, why are you practically naked from the waist up?” Kalai was staring wide eyed at him as he approached her and Jackie was on the bow. Jackie had everything ready; the buoy line was strung through the horns and ready to toss out. A giant orange and blue beach ball sized float hung at the end of the line to mark the end and make it easier to pick up later.
“Trade me your coat for these. If Jackie’s putting you to work, you’ll need these to keep warm.”
“I’m alright, I can-”
“I’m the Skipper of this boat, and I’m ordering you to take off that wet coat and put these on; and Jackie?” Andy gave his cousin a long and piercing look. “Give her the elbow gloves, not the halfsies.”
The scoff and the muttered Salishian profanities meant he’d read the next prank she’d had in mind right. She was planning on giving her the cloth gloves with only the palms and fingers coated in rubber. While perfectly fine for fishing, Andy knew they tended to get soaked through very quickly and did nothing to keep jellyfish stingers and fish slime off your hands. Kalai sputtered for a moment before she complied gratefully and she accepted the dry clothes and rain slicker.
Andy saw Jackie give him a strange look before looking back at Kalai, but he paid it no mind. He walked back to the controls on the drum and switched off the hydraulics, placing the mechanism in neutral. “SLING IT!” Andy called as he took the small jerry rigged steering wheel and threw the boat in reverse. Kalai jumped as the line started unspooling the net into the water at a rapid pace.
Andy set an ‘S’ bend in the quarter mile long net, zigzagging backwards until they came to the end of the line. Andy stopped the boat as Jackie tied off the other large buoy and tossed it over the side, unstringing the cork-line from the roller horns in the process. He pulled hard over and put a bit of distance from the net before shutting the engine down. The line of white and yellow corks marking the net bobbed lazily with the swells as silence settled over the water again. The waves rocked the boat gently as Andy found his sea legs again.
“Alright, I’ll get breakfast going. Jackie, Kalai? Post the watch for seals,” Andy called as he walked back into the cabin to fire up the tiny little gas stove.
Sakalbi, having found the confidence to stand at last, poked her head out of the cabin and stood on by the hatch to the fish hold. “Seals? Why would you need to watch for seals?”
Andy grit his teeth and looked over from where he was cracking open and scrambling eggs. “They’re the spawn of Satan and we hate their guts!” Andy bit out. Jackie came back and pulled the two shotguns and a pair of binoculars from the closet. Andy reached over to a side cabinet and pulled out a box of shells for them. Both his boss and the Doctor’s eyes got wide.
“Seals are the enemy of our blood. Were it not for the invasion, our unending war against these vermin would continue to this day!” Jackie growled as she loaded one for herself and rested the other on Andy’s seat at the helm.
The look of growing horror on Sakalbi’s face towards their facetious declarations caused Andy to chuckle a bit, before launching into an explanation. “We’re not fans of the species because they’ll wait until a fish gets caught in the net and then they’ll steal it, costing us a fish AND ripping a big hole in our nets that we then have to take time to repair. We use the shotguns and buckshot to give them a nice welt and convince them not to hang around, because they’ll wait up on the surface and watch the buoys, just like us. A single seal can and will take between five and ten fish. The worst is when they start getting full, they’ll just bite out the bellies of a salmon in the net. We can’t really do anything with that fish once it’s ‘seal-bit’. So yes, as fishermen, we hate them.”
“Learned opportunism in apex predators as a response to human activity… I think I’ll go see this behavior for myself!” Sakalbi practically rushed out the door towards the bow where Jackie was sitting on the roller horns explaining to Kalai how to spot the bastards, leaving Andy alone in the cabin with the Doctor while he cooked breakfast for them all.
Dr. He’osforos sat down heavily in the booth and pulled out his omnipad. “I’ve had a word with my friend in the Interior. She’s pulled the warrant for your brother, and I’ve withdrawn the charges I filed.”
Andy froze and turned around slowly. The only sound was the sizzle and pop of the eggs and chorizo that he’d added to them in the skillet. “You mean… it’s done? He can come home?” A wave of light headed euphoria swept over Andy and he swayed with the gentle rocking of the boat. “I will pay you back, Doc-”
The doctor held up his hand and stopped Andy. “We’ll call it even, but there’s something… I was able to get my hands on this,” Andy watched as the doctor swiped something towards his omnipad and it dinged. “What is it if I may-”
“Are you really asking an Indian to tell you a story? Because it’s going to be a long one if you are.” “I’m Sevastutavan, young man; we invented long stories.”
Andy froze and stared at the screen of his omnipad. The Vatikre was heavily accented, and Andy had a bit of trouble with the unfamiliar accent, but centered in the frame in a hospital room, sitting in a wheelchair, was a Salishian boy. Andy blinked in surprise as he stared at the screen. “Is that-”
“I am Ikw’is’hi’ehlah, and this bearer is… of the Orca Clan Sheloksets. I drove our Haida enemies onto the rocks and took many heads when they attacked our winter village on Orcas Island. I signed the Treaty with the Great White Father and I fought against the slavers of the south-”
Andy wanted to grab the omnipad but the smell of overcooking eggs brought his attention back to breakfast and Andy stirred and scrapped the food quickly, trying to save it.
“I asked her for any materials she could give me on your brother. Pictures, recordings, anything. This is what she gave me. It's the last known recording of your brother during an interrogation conducted by a Navy Commissar prior to his escape. It seems he made friends with a Pod of Deaths Head Commandos. Quite a bit of the recording has been redacted, but… there are portions of it where he talks about his family and his history. I thought you might like to have it.”
Andy hurriedly pulled out paper plates and a slice of bread for everyone and scooped a heaping portion of the chorizo eggs onto them. He handed the doctor his before leaning out the cabin door. “Slop’s on, come and get it!”
Andy sat down after moving the shotgun out of the way and started the video over again as the three women came back to grab their plates and lost himself watching his brother start telling his story.
“What’s that?” Andy heard Kalai ask over his shoulder, and he paused the video.
“That’s my brother! That’s Kay Tee!”
“Holy shit, what?” Jackie nearly shoved Kalai into Andy as she jammed her bread slice down her gullet and crowded in to see the screen.
Andy started the video over a second time and they watched in silence. “God, that brings back memories. Back when mom was still alive and before we broke up the warband. I can’t believe that slippery little punk ghosted a pod of Commandos for two fucking years! Holy shit, that’s badass!”
Before Andy could say anything, Sakalbi started coughing and brought the binoculars up. “Uh, Andy? Jackie? What do we do about sharks?”
Jackie looked at Andy in confusion. “Sharks? There’s nothing but Dogs around here.”
“Well those are shark fins and they’re charging the net!” Sakalbi pointed and Andy looked up to see dorsal fins charging the center of the net.
Andy looked at Jackie and spoke the same words in tandem, “Oh shit!”
​
First:
https://www.reddit.com/Sexyspacebabes/comments/yz0u3h/the_cryptid_chronicle_chapter_1/
Previous:
https://www.reddit.com/Sexyspacebabes/comments/13nh0oe/cryptid_chronicle_chapter_29/
Next:
To be posted 6/4/23
submitted by Kazevenikov to Sexyspacebabes [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 04:57 AceWarwolf_108 Decal Restrictions. Yes or no?

What do you guys think about the current restrictions for decals? Before you were able to place decals on whatever vehicle you wanted regardless of which nation it belonged to. Some examples; RAF roundels on a A6M5 Ko, Soviet stars on a P-51D-30, German crosses on a Comet, or even East German emblems on Soviet vehicles.
The only reason I could possibly see Gaijin keeping the restrictions in place is mainly due to SB. But both air and ground SB have already implemented ways for you to identify vehicles. Air SB let's you see the names and aircraft of teammates when they get within a certain range. And ground SB lets you mark yourself on the map, and you're able to use your rangefinder to identify vehicles as friends or foe.
Decals don't matter in Air SB. You don't get close enough to look at the markings on planes. And when you get close enough to an unknown plane, by that point, a name will pop up to indicate it's a teammate. Of course, if a name doesn't pop up, it's an enemy. Decals play no role in Air SB.
As for ground SB... let's be real here. It's beyond fixing with all of the copy/paste that's been introduced throughout the years. You can freely put US decals on an Italian M18 or Japanese M24. Or disguise your T-V as a German Panther with the "Peanuts" decal. It's completely pointless. The Snail has introduced ways to identify vehicles, some work and some don't. It boils down to players keeping track of what tanks your teammates are in and hoping someone on the enemy team doesn't have a similar vehicle.
There are also skins in the game that are technically violations of the decal restrictions the Snail put in place. Such as those of the US Spitfire, British Vampire with an Italian skin, French F-51C with a US skin. Heck, Soviet tanks are still able to use the Finnish summer skin. Which the Swedish T-80U also has, along with the Soviet deforming tri-color skin.
So, that's why I bring up the question. Do we need decal restrictions? Decals are a form of customization that generally doesn't do anything to disguise you in AB or RB. You can't slap on USAF embems on a German CL-13 and form up with a US F-86. Nor can you add bushes to a German BMP-1 to trick a Soviet BMP-1. It's practically impossible to trick someone in AB or RB unless you get extremely lucky. Decals just let you custom your vehicles to suit the way you want them to look. If you want to put Russian stars on an F-14A, go ahead. Or RAF roundels on a MiG-29. It simply doesn't affect anything in AB or RB. Some will argue about their immersion, but there are plenty of silly things in this game already. Historical accuracy is dead, and the Snail killed it.
What do you guys think? Keep the restrictions despite it only really affecting a single game mode with a low player count? Or remove the restrictions and let players add whatever they want to their vehicles?
Tldr: Decal restrictions are silly and unnecessary. They should be unrestricted in AB or RB.
submitted by AceWarwolf_108 to Warthunder [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 04:49 moe_master The world longest joke (Pt 2)

I told you that you'd heal quickly now."
"Yeah, well, still," said Jack, "it's the principle of the thing. And nobody likes being bitten in the butt! Couldn't you have gotten my calf or something instead?"
"More meat in the typical human butt," replied Nate. "And less chance you accidentally kick me or move at the last second."
"Yeah, right. So, tell me all of these wonderful secrets that I now qualify to hear," answered Jack.
"Ok," said Nate. "Do you want to ask questions first, or do you want me to just start talking?"
"Just talk," said Jack. "I'll sit here and try to not think about food."
"We could go try to rustle up some food for you first, if you like," answered Nate.
"Hey! You didn't tell me you had food around here, Nate!" Jack jumped up. "What do we have? Am I in walking distance to town? Or can you magically whip up food along with your other powers?" Jack was almost shouting with excitement. His stomach had been growling for hours.
"I was thinking more like I could flush something out of its hole and bite it for you, and you could skin it and eat it. Assuming you have a knife, that is," replied Nate, with the grin that Jack was starting to get used to.
"Ugh," said Jack, sitting back down. "I think I'll pass. I can last a little longer before I get desperate enough to eat desert rat, or whatever else it is you find out here. And there's nothing to burn - I'd have to eat it raw. No thanks. Just talk."
"Ok," replied Nate, still grinning. "But I'd better hurry, before you start looking at me as food.
Nate reared back a little, looked around for a second, and then continued. "You, Jack, are sitting in the middle of the Garden of Eden."
Jack looked around at the sand and dunes and then looked back at Nate sceptically.
"Well, that's the best I can figure it, anyway, Jack," said Nate. "Stand up and look at the symbol on the rock here." Nate gestured around the dark stone they were both sitting on with his nose.
Jack stood up and looked. Carved into the stone in a bas-relief was a representation of a large tree. The angled-pole that Nate was wrapped around was coming out of the trunk of the tree, right below where the main branches left the trunk to reach out across the stone. It was very well done - it looked more like a tree had been reduced to almost two dimensions and embedded in the stone than it did like a carving.
Jack walked around and looked at the details in the fading light of the setting sun. He wished he'd looked at it while the sun was higher in the sky.
Wait! The sun was setting! That meant he was going to have to spend another night out here! Arrrgh!
Jack looked out across the desert for a little bit, and then came back and stood next to Nate. "In all the excitement, I almost forgot, Nate," said Jack. "Which way is it back to town? And how far? I'm eventually going to have to head back - I'm not sure I'll be able to survive by eating raw desert critters for long. And even if I can, I'm not sure I'll want to."
"It's about 30 miles that way." Nate pointed, with the rattle on his tail this time. As far as Jack could tell, it was a direction at right angles to the way he'd been going when he was crawling here. "But that's 30 miles by the way the crow flies. It's about 40 by the way a man walks. You should be able to do it in about half a day with your improved endurance, if you head out early tomorrow, Jack."
Jack looked out the way the snake had pointed for a few seconds more, and then sat back down. It was getting dark. Not much he could do about heading out right now. And besides, Nate was just about to get to the interesting stuff. "Garden of Eden? As best as you can figure it?"
"Well, yeah, as best as I and Samuel could figure it anyway," said Nate. "He figured that the story just got a little mixed up. You know, snake, in a 'tree', offering 'temptations', making bargains. That kind stuff. But he could never quite figure out how the Hebrews found out about this spot from across the ocean. He worried about that for a while."
"Garden of Eden, hunh?" said Jack. "How long have you been here, Nate?"
"No idea, really," replied Nate. "A long time. It never occurred to me to count years, until recently, and by then, of course, it was too late. But I do remember when this whole place was green, so I figure it's been thousands of years, at least."
"So, are you the snake that tempted Eve?" said Jack.
"Beats me," said Nate. "Maybe. I can't remember if the first one of your kind that I talked to was female or not, and I never got a name, but it could have been. And I suppose she could have considered my offer to grant requests a 'temptation', though I've rarely had refusals."
"Well, umm, how did you get here then? And why is that white pole stuck out of the stone there?" asked Jack.
"Dad left me here. Or, I assume it was my dad. It was another snake - much bigger than I was back then. I remember talking to him, but I don't remember if it was in a language, or just kind of understanding what he wanted. But one day, he brought me to this stone, told me about it, and asked me to do something for him. I talked it over with him for a while, then agreed. I've been here ever since.
"What is this place?" said Jack. "And what did he ask you to do?"
"Well, you see this pole here, sticking out of the stone?" Nate loosened his coils around the tilted white pole and showed Jack where it descended into the stone. The pole was tilted at about a 45 degree angle and seemed to enter the stone in an eighteen inch slot cut into the stone. Jack leaned over and looked. The slot was dark and the pole went down into it as far as Jack could see in the dim light. Jack reached out to touch the pole, but Nate was suddenly there in the way.
"You can't touch that yet, Jack," said Nate.
"Why not?" asked Jack.
"I haven't explained it to you yet," replied Nate.
"Well, it kinda looks like a lever or something," said Jack. "You'd push it that way, and it would move in the slot."
"Yep, that's what it is," replied Nate.
"What does it do?" asked Jack. "End the world?"
"Oh, no," said Nate. "Nothing that drastic. It just ends humanity. I call it 'The Lever of Doom'." For the last few words Nate had used a deeper, ringing voice. He tried to look serious for a few seconds, and then gave up and grinned.
Jack was initially startled by Nate's pronouncement, but when Nate grinned Jack laughed. "Ha! You almost had me fooled for a second there. What does it really do?"
"Oh, it really ends humanity, like I said," smirked Nate. "I just thought the voice I used was funny, didn't you?"
Nate continued to grin.
"A lever to end humanity?" asked Jack. "What in the world is that for? Why would anyone need to end humanity?"
"Well," replied Nate, "I get the idea that maybe humanity was an experiment. Or maybe the Big Guy just thought, that if humanity started going really bad, there should be a way to end it. I'm not really sure. All I know are the rules, and the guesses that Samuel and I had about why it's here. I didn't think to ask back when I started here."
"Rules? What rules?" asked Jack.
"The rules are that I can't tell anybody about it or let them touch it unless they agree to be bound to secrecy by a bite. And that only one human can be bound in that way at a time. That's it." explained Nate.
Jack looked somewhat shocked. "You mean that I could pull the lever now? You'd let me end humanity?"
"Yep," replied Nate, "if you want to." Nate looked at Jack carefully. "Do you want to, Jack?"
"Umm, no." said Jack, stepping a little further back from the lever. "Why in the world would anyone want to end humanity? It'd take a psychotic to want that! Or worse, a suicidal psychotic, because it would kill him too, wouldn't it?"
"Yep," replied Nate, "being as he'd be human too."
"Has anyone ever seriously considered it?" asked Jack. "Any of those bound to secrecy, that is?"
"Well, of course, I think they've all seriously considered it at one time or another. Being given that kind of responsibility makes you sit down and think, or so I'm told. Samuel considered it several times. He'd often get disgusted with humanity, come out here, and just hold the lever for a while. But he never pulled it. Or you wouldn't be here." Nate grinned some more.
Jack sat down, well back from the lever. He looked thoughtful and puzzled at the same time. After a bit, he said, "So this makes me the Judge of humanity? I get to decide whether they keep going or just end? Me?"
"That seems to be it," agreed Nate.
"What kind of criteria do I use to decide?" said Jack. "How do I make this decision? Am I supposed to decide if they're good? Or too many of them are bad? Or that they're going the wrong way? Is there a set of rules for that?"
"Nope," replied Nate. "You pretty much just have to decide on your own. It's up to you, however you want to decide it. I guess that you're just supposed to know."
"But what if I get mad at someone? Or some girl dumps me and I feel horrible? Couldn't I make a mistake? How do I know that I won't screw up?" protested Jack.
Nate gave his kind of snake-like shrug again. "You don't. You just have to try your best, Jack."
Jack sat there for a while, staring off into the desert that was rapidly getting dark, chewing on a fingernail.
Suddenly, Jack turned around and looked at the snake. "Nate, was Samuel the one bound to this before me?"
"Yep," replied Nate. "He was a good guy. Talked to me a lot. Taught me to read and brought me books. I think I still have a good pile of them buried in the sand around here somewhere. I still miss him. He died a few months ago."
"Sounds like a good guy," agreed Jack. "How did he handle this, when you first told him. What did he do?"
"Well," said Nate, "he sat down for a while, thought about it for a bit, and then asked me some questions, much like you're doing."
"What did he ask you, if you're allowed to tell me?" asked Jack.
"He asked me about the third request," replied Nate.
"Aha!" It was Jack's turn to grin. "And what did you tell him?"
"I told him the rules for the third request. That to get the third request you have to agree to this whole thing. That if it ever comes to the point that you really think that humanity should be ended, that you'll come here and end it. You won't avoid it, and you won't wimp out." Nate looked serious again. "And you'll be bound to do it too, Jack."
"Hmmm." Jack looked back out into the darkness for a while.
Nate watched him, waiting.
"Nate," continued Jack, quietly, eventually. "What did Samuel ask for with his third request?"
Nate sounded like he was grinning again as he replied, also quietly, "Wisdom, Jack. He asked for wisdom. As much as I could give him."
"Ok," said Jack, suddenly, standing up and facing away from Nate, "give it to me.
Nate looked at Jack's backside. "Give you what, Jack?"
"Give me that wisdom. The same stuff that Samuel asked for. If it helped him, maybe it'll help me too." Jack turned his head to look back over his shoulder at Nate. "It did help him, right?"
"He said it did," replied Nate. "But he seemed a little quieter afterward. Like he had a lot to think about."
"Well, yeah, I can see that," said Jack. "So, give it to me." Jack turned to face away from Nate again, bent over slightly and tensed up.
Nate watched Jack tense up with a little exasperation. If he bit Jack now, Jack would likely jump out of his skin and maybe hurt them both.
"You remember that you'll be bound to destroy humanity if it ever looks like it needs it, right Jack?" asked Nate, shifting position.
"Yeah, yeah, I got that," replied Jack, eyes squeezed tightly shut and body tense, not noticing the change in direction of Nate's voice.
"And," continued Nate, from his new position, "do you remember that you'll turn bright purple, and grow big horns and extra eyes?"
"Yeah, yeah...Hey, wait a minute!" said Jack, opening his eyes, straightening up and turning around. "Purple?!" He didn't see Nate there. With the moonlight Jack could see that the lever extended up from its slot in the rock without the snake wrapped around it.
Jack heard, from behind him, Nate's "Just Kidding!" right before he felt the now familiar piercing pain, this time in the other buttock.
Jack sat on the edge of the dark stone in the rapidly cooling air, his feet extending out into the sand. He stared out into the darkness, listening to the wind stir the sand, occasionally rubbing his butt where he'd been recently bitten.
Nate had left for a little while, had come back with a desert-rodent-shaped bulge somewhere in his middle, and was now wrapped back around the lever, his tongue flicking out into the desert night's air the only sign that he was still awake.
Occasionally Jack, with his toes absentmindedly digging in the sand while he thought, would ask Nate a question without turning around.
"Nate, do accidents count?"
Nate lifted his head a little bit. "What do you mean, Jack?"
Jack tilted his head back like he was looking at the stars. "You know, accidents. If I accidentally fall on the lever, without meaning to, does that still wipe out humanity?"
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure it does, Jack. I'd suggest you be careful about that if you start feeling wobbly," said Nate with some amusement.
A little later - "Does it have to be me that pulls the lever?" asked Jack.
"That's the rule, Jack. Nobody else can pull it," answered Nate.
"No," Jack shook his head, "I meant does it have to be my hand? Could I pull the lever with a rope tied around it? Or push it with a stick? Or throw a rock?"
"Yes, those should work," replied Nate. "Though I'm not sure how complicated you could get. Samuel thought about trying to build some kind of remote control for it once, but gave it up. Everything he'd build would be gone by the next sunrise, if it was touching the stone, or over it. I told him that in the past others that had been bound had tried to bury the lever so they wouldn't be tempted to pull it, but every time the stones or sand or whatever had disappeared."
"Wow," said Jack, "Cool." Jack leaned back until only his elbows kept him off of the stone and looked up into the sky.
"Nate, how long did Samuel live? One of his wishes was for health too, right?" asked Jack.
"Yes," replied Nate, "it was. He lived 167 years, Jack."
"Wow, 167 years. That's almost 140 more years I'll live if I live as long. Do you know what he died of, Nate?"
"He died of getting tired of living, Jack," Nate said, sounding somewhat sad.
Jack turned his head to look at Nate in the starlight.
Nate looked back. "Samuel knew he wasn't going to be able to stay in society. He figured that they'd eventually see him still alive and start questioning it, so he decided that he'd have to disappear after a while. He faked his death once, but changed his mind - he decided it was too early and he could stay for a little longer. He wasn't very fond of mankind, but he liked the attention. Most of the time, anyway.
"His daughter and then his wife dying almost did him in though. He didn't stay in society much longer after that. He eventually came out here to spend time talking to me and thinking about pulling the lever. A few months ago he told me he'd had enough. It was his time."
"And then he just died?" asked Jack.
Nate shook his head a little. "He made his fourth request, Jack. There's only one thing you can ask for the fourth request. The last bite.
After a bit Nate continued, "He told me that he was tired, that it was his time. He reassured me that someone new would show up soon, like they always had.
After another pause, Nate finished, "Samuel's body disappeared off the stone with the sunrise."
Jack lay back down and looked at the sky, leaving Nate alone with his memories. It was a long time until Jack's breathing evened out into sleep.
Jack woke with the sunrise the next morning. He was a little chilled with the morning desert air, but overall was feeling pretty good. Well, except that his stomach was grumbling and he wasn't willing to eat raw desert rat.
So, after getting directions to town from Nate, making sure he knew how to get back, and reassuring Nate that he'd be back soon, Jack started the long walk back to town. With his new health and Nate's good directions, he made it back easily.
Jack caught a bus back to the city, and showed up for work the next day, little worse for the wear and with a story about getting lost in the desert and walking back out. Within a couple of days Jack had talked a friend with a tow truck into going back out into the desert with him to fetch the SUV. They found it after a couple of hours of searching and towed it back without incident. Jack was careful not to even look in the direction of Nate's lever, though their path back didn't come within sight of it.
Before the next weekend, Jack had gone to a couple of stores, including a book store, and had gotten his SUV back from the mechanic, with a warning to avoid any more joyriding in the desert. On Saturday, Jack headed back to see Nate.
Jack parked a little way out of the small town near Nate, loaded up his new backpack with camping gear and the things he was bringing for Nate, and then started walking. He figured that walking would leave the least trail, and he knew that while not many people camped in the desert, it wasn't unheard of, and shouldn't really raise suspicions.
Jack had brought more books for Nate - recent books, magazines, newspapers. Some things that would catch Nate up with what was happening in the world, others that were just good books to read. He spent the weekend with Nate, and then headed out again, telling Nate that he'd be back again soon, but that he had things to do first.
Over four months later Jack was back to see Nate again. This time he brought a laptop with him - a specially modified laptop. It had a solar recharger, special filters and seals to keep out the sand, a satellite link-up, and a special keyboard and joystick that Jack hoped that a fifteen-foot rattlesnake would be able to use. And, it had been hacked to not give out its location to the satellite.
After that Jack could e-mail Nate to keep in touch, but still visited him fairly regularly - at least once or twice a year.
After the first year, Jack quit his job. For some reason, with the wisdom he'd been given, and the knowledge that he could live for over 150 years, working in a nine to five job for someone else didn't seem that worthwhile any more. Jack went back to school.
Eventually, Jack started writing. Perhaps because of the wisdom, or perhaps because of his new perspective, he wrote well. People liked what he wrote, and he became well known for it. After a time, Jack bought an RV and started traveling around the country for book signings and readings.
But, he still remembered to drop by and visit Nate occasionally.
On one of the visits Nate seemed quieter than usual. Not that Nate had been a fountain of joy lately. Jack's best guess was that Nate was still missing Samuel, and though Jack had tried, he still hadn't been able to replace Samuel in Nate's eyes. Nate had been getting quieter each visit. But on this visit Nate didn't even speak when Jack walked up to the lever. He nodded at Jack, and then went back to staring into the desert. Jack, respecting Nate's silence, sat down and waited.
After a few minutes, Nate spoke. "Jack, I have someone to introduce you to."
Jack looked surprised. "Someone to introduce me to?" Jack looked around, and then looked carefully back at Nate. "This something to do with the Big Guy?
"No, no," replied Nate. "This is more personal. I want you to meet my son." Nate looked over at the nearest sand dune. "Sammy!"
Jack watched as a four foot long desert rattlesnake crawled from behind the dune and up to the stone base of the lever.
"Yo, Jack," said the new, much smaller snake.
"Yo, Sammy" replied Jack. Jack looked at Nate. "Named after Samuel, I assume?"
Nate nodded. "Jack, I've got a favor to ask you. Could you show Sammy around for me?" Nate unwrapped himself from the lever and slithered over to the edge of the stone and looked across the sands. "When Samuel first told me about the world, and brought me books and pictures, I wished that I could go see it. I wanted to see the great forests, the canyons, the cities, even the other deserts, to see if they felt and smelled the same. I want my son to have that chance - to see the world. Before he becomes bound here like I have been.
"He's seen it in pictures, over the computer that you brought me. But I hear that it's not the same. That being there is different. I want him to have that. Think you can do that for me, Jack?"
Jack nodded. This was obviously very important to Nate, so Jack didn't even joke about taking a talking rattlesnake out to see the world. "Yeah, I can do that for you, Nate. Is that all you need?" Jack could sense that was something more.
Nate looked at Sammy. Sammy looked back at Nate for a second and then said, "Oh, yeah. Ummm, I've gotta go pack. Back in a little bit Jack. Nice to meet ya!" Sammy slithered back over the dune and out of sight.
Nate watched Sammy disappear and then looked back at Jack. "Jack, this is my first son. My first offspring through all the years. You don't even want to know what it took for me to find a mate." Nate grinned to himself. "But anyway, I had a son for a reason. I'm tired. I'm ready for it to be over. I needed a replacement."
Jack considered this for a minute. "So, you're ready to come see the world, and you wanted him to watch the lever while you were gone?"
Nate shook his head. "No, Jack - you're a better guesser than that. You've already figured out - I'm bound here - there's only one way for me to leave here. And I'm ready. It's my time to die."
Jack looked more closely at Nate. He could tell Nate had thought about this - probably for quite a while. Jack had trouble imagining what it would be like to be as old as Nate, but Jack could already tell that in another hundred or two hundred years, he might be getting tired of life himself. Jack could understand Samuel's decision, and now Nate's. So, all Jack said was, "What do you want me to do?"
Nate nodded. "Thanks, Jack. I only want two things. One - show Sammy around the world - let him get his fill of it, until he's ready to come back here and take over. Two - give me the fourth request.
"I can't just decide to die, not any more than you can. I won't even die of old age like you eventually will, even though it'll be a long time from now. I need to be killed. Once Sammy is back here, ready to take over, I'll be able to die. And I need you to kill me.
"I've even thought about how. Poisons and other drugs won't work on me. And I've seen pictures of snakes that were shot - some of them live for days, so that's out too. So, I want you to bring back a sword.
Nate turned away to look back to the dune that Sammy had gone behind. "I'd say an axe, but that's somewhat undignified - putting my head on the ground or a chopping block like that. No, I like a sword. A time-honored way of going out. A dignified way to die. And, most importantly, it should work, even on me.
"You willing to do that for me, Jack?" Nate turned back to look at Jack.
"Yeah, Nate," replied Jack solemnly, "I think I can handle that."
Nate nodded. "Good!" He turned back toward the dune and shouted, "Sammy! Jack's about ready to leave!" Then quietly, "Thanks, Jack."
Jack didn't have anything to say to that, so he waited for Sammy to make it back to the lever, nodded to him, nodded a final time to Nate, and then headed into the desert with Sammy following.
Over the next several years Sammy and Jack kept in touch with Nate through e-mail as they went about their adventures. They made a goal of visiting every country in the world, and did a respectable job of it. Sammy had a natural gift for languages, as Jack expected he would, and even ended up acting as a translator for Jack in a few of the countries. Jack managed to keep the talking rattlesnake hidden, even so, and by the time they were nearing the end of their tour of countries, Sammy had only been spotted a few times. While there were several people that had seen enough to startle them greatly, nobody had enough evidence to prove anything, and while a few wild rumors and stories followed Jack and Sammy around, nothing ever hit the newspapers or the public in general.
When they finished the tour of countries, Jack suggested that they try some undersea diving. They did. And spelunking. They did that too. Sammy finally drew the line at visiting Antarctica. He'd come to realize that Jack was stalling. After talking to his Dad about it over e-mail, he figured out that Jack probably didn't want to have to kill Nate. Nate told Sammy that humans could be squeamish about killing friends and acquaintances.
So, Sammy eventually put his tail down (as he didn't have a foot) and told Jack that it was time - he was ready to go back and take up his duties from his dad. Jack, delayed it a little more by insisting that they go back to Japan and buy an appropriate sword. He even stretched it a little more by getting lessons in how to use the sword. But, eventually, he'd learned as much as he was likely to without dedicating his life to it, and was definitely competent enough to take the head off of a snake. It was time to head back and see Nate.
When they got back to the US, Jack got the old RV out of storage where he and Sammy had left it after their tour of the fifty states, he loaded up Sammy and the sword, and they headed for the desert.
When they got to the small town that Jack had been trying to find those years ago when he'd met Nate, Jack was in a funk. He didn't really feel like walking all of the way out there. Not only that, but he'd forgotten to figure the travel time correctly, and it was late afternoon. They'd either have to spend the night in town and walk out tomorrow, or walk in the dark.
As Jack was afraid that if he waited one more night he might lose his resolve, he decided that he'd go ahead and drive the RV out there. It was only going to be this once, and Jack would go back and cover the tracks afterward. They ought to be able to make it out there by nightfall if they drove, and then they could get it over tonight.
Jack told Sammy to e-mail Nate that they were coming as he drove out of sight of the town on the road. They then pulled off the road and headed out into the desert.
Everything went well, until they got to the sand dunes. Jack had been nursing the RV along the whole time, over the rocks, through the creek beds, revving the engine the few times they almost got stuck. When they came to the dunes, Jack didn't really think about it, he just downshifted and headed up the first one. By the third dune, Jack started to regret that he'd decided to try driving on the sand. The RV was fishtailling and losing traction. Jack was having to work it up each dune slowly and was trying to keep from losing control each time they came over the top and slid down the other side. Sammy had come up to sit in the passenger seat, coiled up and laughing at Jack's driving.
As they came over the top of the fourth dune, the biggest one yet, Jack saw that this was the final dune - the stone, the lever, and somewhere Nate, waited below. Jack put on the brakes, but he'd gone a little too far. The RV started slipping down the other side.
Jack tried turning the wheel, but he didn't have enough traction. He pumped the brakes - no response. They started sliding down the hill, faster and faster.
Jack felt a shock go through him as he suddenly realized that they were heading for the lever. He looked down - the RV was directly on course for it. If Jack didn't do something, the RV would hit it. He was about to end humanity.
Jack steered more frantically, trying to get traction. It still wasn't working. The dune was too steep, and the sand too loose. In a split second, Jack realized that his only chance would be once he hit the stone around the lever - he should have traction on the stone for just a second before he hit the lever - he wouldn't have time to stop, but he should be able to steer away.
Jack took a better grip on the steering wheel and tried to turn the RV a little bit - every little bit would help. He'd have to time his turn just right.
The RV got to the bottom of the dune, sliding at an amazing speed in the sand. Just before they reached the stone Jack looked across it to check that they were still heading for the lever. They were. But Jack noticed something else that he hadn't seen from the top of the dune. Nate wasn't wrapped around the lever. He was off to the side of the lever, but still on the stone, waiting for them. The problem was, he was waiting on the same side of the lever that Jack had picked to steer towards to avoid the lever. The RV was already starting to drift that way a little in its mad rush across the sand and there was no way that Jack was going to be able to go around the lever to the other side.
Jack had an instant of realization. He was either going to have to hit the lever, or run over Nate. He glanced over at Sammy and saw that Sammy realized the same thing.
Jack took a firmer grip on the steering wheel as the RV ran up on the stone. Shouting to Sammy as he pulled the steering wheel, "Better Nate than lever!", he ran over the snake.
THE END
submitted by moe_master to copypasta [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 04:48 moe_master The world longest joke (Pt 1)

So, there's a man crawling through the desert.
He'd decided to try his SUV in a little bit of cross-country travel, had great fun zooming over the badlands and through the sand, got lost, hit a big rock, and then he couldn't get it started again. There were no cell phone towers anywhere near, so his cell phone was useless. He had no family, his parents had died a few years before in an auto accident, and his few friends had no idea he was out here.
He stayed with the car for a day or so, but his one bottle of water ran out and he was getting thirsty. He thought maybe he knew the direction back, now that he'd paid attention to the sun, and thought he'd figured out which way was north, so he decided to start walking. He figured he only had to go about 30 miles or so and he'd be back to the small town he'd gotten gas in last.
He thinks about walking at night to avoid the heat and sun, but based upon how dark it actually was the night before, and given that he has no flashlight, he's afraid that he'll break a leg or step on a rattlesnake. So, he puts on some sun block, puts the rest in his pocket for reapplication later, brings an umbrella he'd had in the back of the SUV with him to give him a little shade, pours the windshield wiper fluid into his water bottle in case he gets that desperate, brings his pocket knife in case he finds a cactus that looks like it might have water in it, and heads out in the direction he thinks is right.
He walks for the entire day. By the end of the day he's really thirsty. He's been sweating all day, and his lips are starting to crack. He's reapplied the sunblock twice, and tried to stay under the umbrella, but he still feels sunburned. The windshield wiper fluid sloshing in the bottle in his pocket is really getting tempting now. He knows that it's mainly water and some ethanol and coloring, but he also knows that they add some kind of poison to it to keep people from drinking it. He wonders what the poison is, and whether the poison would be worse than dying of thirst.
He pushes on, trying to get to that small town before dark.
By the end of the day, he starts getting worried. He figures he's been walking at least three miles an hour, according to his watch for over ten hours. That means that if his estimate was right, he should be close to the town. Unfortunately, he doesn't recognize any of this. He had to cross a dry creek bed a mile or two back, and he doesn't remember coming through it in the SUV. He figures that maybe he got his direction off just a little and that the dry creek bed was just off to one side of his path. He tells himself that he's close, and that after dark he'll start seeing the town lights over one of these hills. That'll be all he needs.
As it gets dim enough that he starts stumbling over small rocks and things, he finds a spot and sits down to wait for full dark and the town lights.
Full dark comes before he knows it. He must have dozed off. He stands back up and turns all the way around. He sees nothing but stars.
He wakes up the next morning feeling absolutely lousy. His eyes are gummy and his mouth and nose feel like they're full of sand. He’s so thirsty that he can't even swallow. He barely got any sleep because it was so cold. He'd forgotten how cold it got at night in the desert and hadn't noticed it the night before because he'd been in his car.
He knows the Rule of Threes - three minutes without air, three days without water, three weeks without food - then you die. Some people can make it a little longer, in the best situations. The desert heat and having to walk and sweat isn't the best situation to be in without water. Unless he finds water, he figures, this is his last day.
He rinses out his mouth with a little of the windshield wiper fluid. He waits for a while after spitting that little bit out to see if his mouth goes numb, or he feels dizzy or something. Has his mouth gone numb? Is it just in his mind? He's not sure. He'll go a little farther, and if he still doesn't find water, he'll try drinking some of the fluid.
Then he has to face his next, harder question - which way does he go from here? Does he keep walking the same way as yesterday (assuming that he still knows which way that is), or does he try a new direction? He has no idea what to do.
Looking at the hills and dunes around him, he thinks he knows the direction he was heading before. Just going by a feeling, he points himself somewhat to the left of that, and starts walking.
As he walks, the day starts heating up. The desert, too cold just a couple of hours before, soon becomes an oven again. He sweats a little at first, and then stops. He starts getting worried at that. He knows that when you stop sweating, you’re in trouble. It’s usually right before heat stroke..
He decides that it's time to try the windshield wiper fluid. He can't wait any longer - if he passes out, he's dead. He stops in the shade of a large rock, takes the bottle out, opens it, and takes a mouthful. He slowly swallows it, making it last as long as he can. It feels so good in his dry and cracked throat that he doesn't even care about the nasty taste. He takes another mouthful, and makes it last too. Slowly, he drinks half the bottle. He figures that since he's drinking it, he might as well drink enough to make some difference and keep himself from passing out.
He's quit worrying about the denaturing of the wiper fluid. If it kills him, it kills him. If he didn't drink it, he'd die anyway. Besides, he's pretty sure that whatever substance they denature the fluid with is just designed to make you sick: their way of keeping winos from buying cheap wiper fluid for the ethanol content. He can handle throwing up if it comes to that.
He walks. He walks in the hot, dry, windless desert. Sand, rocks, hills, dunes, the occasional scrawny cactus or dried bush. No sign of water. Sometimes he'll see a little movement to one side or the other, but whatever moved is usually gone before he can focus his eyes on it. Probably birds, lizards, or mice. Maybe snakes, though they usually move more at night. He's careful to stay away from the movements.
After a while, he begins to stagger. He's not sure if it's fatigue, heat stroke finally catching him, or maybe he was wrong and the denaturing of the wiper fluid was worse than he thought. He tries to steady himself and keep going.
After more walking, he comes to a large stretch of sand. This is good! He knows he passed over a stretch of sand in the SUV - he remembers doing donuts in it, or at least he thinks he remembers it; he's getting woozy enough and tired enough that he's not sure what he remembers anymore or if he's hallucinating. He thinks he remembers it, so he heads off into it, trying to get to the other side, hoping that it gets him closer to the town.
He was heading for a town, wasn't he? He thinks he was. He isn't sure anymore. He's not even sure how long he's been walking anymore. Is it still morning? Has it moved into afternoon, and the sun is going down again? It must be afternoon; it seems like it's been too long since he started out.
He walks through the sand.
After a while, he comes to a big dune in the sand. This is bad. He doesn't remember any dunes from when he was driving over the sand in his SUV. At least he doesn't think he remembers any. This is bad.
All the same, he has no other direction to go. Too late to turn back now. He figures that he'll get to the top of the dune and see if he can see anything from there that can help him find the town. He keeps going up the dune.
Halfway up, he slips in the bad footing of the sand for the second or third time and falls to his knees. He doesn't feel like getting back up, since he'll just fall down again. He keeps going up the dune on his hand and knees.
While crawling, if his throat weren't so dry, he'd laugh. He's finally gotten to the hackneyed image of a man lost in the desert, crawling through the sand on his hands and knees. It would be the perfect image, he imagines, if only his clothes were more ragged. The people crawling through the desert in the cartoons always had ragged clothes, but his have lasted without any rips so far. Somebody will probably find his dessicated corpse half buried in the sand years from now, and his clothes will still be in fine shape - shake the sand out, give them a good wash, and they'd be wearable again. He wishes his throat were wet enough to laugh. He coughs a little instead, and it hurts.
He finally makes it to the top of the sand dune. Now that he's at the top, he struggles a little, but manages to stand up and look around. All he sees is sand. Sand and more sand. Behind him, about a mile away, he thinks he sees the rocky ground he left to head into this sand. Ahead of him, more dunes, more sand. This isn't where he drove his SUV. This is Hell. Or close enough.
Again, he doesn't know what to do. He decides to drink the rest of the wiper fluid while figuring it out. He takes out the bottle and starts removing the cap when he glances to the side and sees something. Something in the sand. At the bottom of the dune, off to the side, he sees something strange. It's a flat area, in the sand. He stops opening the bottle and tries to look closer. The area seems to be circular, and it's dark: darker than the sand, and there seems to be something in the middle of it, but he can't tell what it is, so he looks as hard as he can but still can't tell from here. He's going to have to go down there and look.
He puts the bottle back into his pocket, and starts to stumble down the dune. After a few steps, he realizes that he's in trouble; he's not going to be able to keep his balance. After a couple more sliding, tottering steps, he falls and starts to roll down the dune. The sand it so hot that he thinks he's caught fire on the way down - like a movie car wreck flashing into flames as it goes over the cliff, before it ever even hits the ground. He closes his eyes and mouth, covers his face with his hands, and waits to stop rolling.
He stops at the bottom of the dune. After a minute or two, he finds enough energy to try to sit up and get the sand out of his face and clothes. When he clears his eyes enough, he looks around to make sure that the dark spot in the sand it still there and he hadn't just imagined it.
Seeing the large, flat, dark spot on the sand still there, he crawls towards it. He'd get up and walk towards it, but he doesn't seem to have the energy to get up and walk right now. He must be in the final stages of dehydration he figures as he crawls. If this place in the sand doesn't have water, he'll likely never make it anywhere else. This is his last chance.
He gets closer and closer, but still can't see what's in the middle of the dark area. It’s hard to focus, and lifting his head up to look takes so much effort that he gives up trying. He just keeps crawling.
Finally, he reaches the area he'd seen from the dune. It takes him a minute of crawling on it before he realizes that he's no longer on sand - he's now crawling on some kind of dark stone. Stone with some kind of marking on it - a pattern cut into the stone. He's too tired to stand up and try to see what the pattern is, so he just keeps crawling. He crawls towards the center where his blurry eyes still see something in the middle of the dark stone area.
His mind, detached in a strange way, notes that either his hands and knees are so burnt by the sand that they no longer feel pain, or that this dark stone, in the middle of a burning desert with a pounding, punishing sun overhead, doesn't seem to be hot. It almost feels cool. He considers lying down on the nice cool surface.
Cool, dark stone. Not a good sign. He must be hallucinating this. He's probably in the middle of a patch of sand, already lying face down and dying, and just imagining this whole thing. A desert mirage. Soon the beautiful women carrying pitchers of water will come up and start giving him a drink. Then he'll know he's gone.
He decides against laying down on the cool stone. If he's going to die here in the middle of this hallucination, he at least wants to see what's in the center before he goes. He keeps crawling.
It's the third time that he hears the voice before he realizes what he's hearing. He would swear that someone just said, "Greetings, traveler. You do not look well. Do you hear me?"
He stops crawling. He tries to look up from where he is on his hands and knees, but it's too much effort to lift his head. So he tries something different: he rolls over and leans back trying to sit up on the stone. After a few seconds, he catches his balance, avoids falling on his face, sits up, and tries to focus his eyes. Blurry. He rubs his eyes with the back of his hands and tries again. Better this time.
Yep. He can see. He's sitting in the middle of a large, flat, dark expanse of stone. Directly next to him, about three feet away, is a white post or pole about two inches in diameter and sticking about four or five feet out of the stone, at an angle.
And wrapped around this white rod is what must be a fifteen foot long desert diamondback rattlesnake, with a hovering tail and rattle seemingly prepared to start rattling, looking directly at him.
He stares at the snake in shock. He doesn't have the energy to get up and run away. He doesn't even have the energy to crawl away. This is it: his final resting place. No matter what happens, he's not going to be able to move from this spot.
Well, at least dying from a bite from this monster should be quicker than dying of thirst. He'll face his end like a man. He struggles to sit up a little straighter. The snake keeps watching him. He lifts one hand and flicks it in the snake's direction, feebly. The snake watches the hand for a moment, then goes back to watching the man, looking into his eyes.
Hmmm. Maybe the snake has no interest in biting him. It hasn't rattled yet - that’s a good sign. Maybe he isn't going to die of snake bite after all.
He then remembers that he'd looked up when he'd reached the center here because he thought he'd heard a voice. He is still very woozy; he feels like he might pass out soon. The sun still beats down on him even though he is now on cool stone. He still doesn't have anything to drink. Although maybe he had actually heard a voice. This stone doesn't look natural. Nor does that white post sticking up out of the stone. Someone must have built this. Maybe they are still nearby. Maybe that was who talked to him. Maybe this snake is even their pet, and that's why it isn't biting.
He tries to clear his throat to say, "Hello," but he’s too dry. All that comes out is a coughing or wheezing sound. There's no way he's going to be able to talk without something to drink. He feels his pocket, and the bottle with the wiper fluid is still there. He shakily pulls out the bottle, almost losing his balance and falling on his back in the process. This isn't good. He doesn't have much time left by his reckoning before he passes out.
He gets the bottle open, manages to get the bottle to his lips, and pours some of the fluid into his mouth. He sloshes it around, and then swallows it. He coughs a little. His throat feels better. Maybe he can talk now.
He tries again. Ignoring the snake, he turns to look around him, hoping to spot the owner of this place, and croaks out, "Hello? Is there anyone here?"
He hears, from his side, "Greetings. What is it that you want?"
He turns his head back towards the snake. That's where the sound seemed to come from. The only thing he can think of is that there must be a speaker hidden under the snake, or maybe built into that post. He decides to try asking for help.
"Please," he croaks again, suddenly feeling dizzy, "I'd love to not be thirsty anymore. I've been without water for a long time. Can you help me?"
Looking in the direction of the snake, hoping to see where the voice was coming from this time, he is shocked to see the snake rear back, open its mouth, and speak. He hears it say, as the dizziness overtakes him and he falls forward, face first on the stone, "Very well. Coming up."
A piercing pain shoots through his shoulder. Suddenly he is awake. He sits up and grabs his shoulder, wincing at the throbbing pain. He's momentarily disoriented as he looks around, and then he remembers: the crawl across the sand, the dark area of stone, the snake. He sees the snake, still wrapped around the tilted white post, still looking at him.
He reaches up and feels his shoulder, where it hurts. It feels slightly wet. He pulls his fingers away and looks at them - blood. He feels his shoulder again - it feels like his shirt has two holes in it - two puncture holes. They match up with the two aching spots of pain on his shoulder. He has been bitten. By the snake.
"It'll feel better in a minute." He looks up - it's the snake talking. He hadn't dreamed it. Suddenly he notices - he's not dizzy anymore. And more importantly, he's not thirsty anymore - at all!
"Have I died? Is this the afterlife? Why are you biting me in the afterlife?"
"Sorry about that, but I had to bite you," says the snake. "That's the way I work. It all comes through the bite. Think of it as natural medicine."
"You bit me to help me? Why aren't I thirsty anymore? Did you give me a drink before you bit me? How did I drink enough while unconscious to not be thirsty anymore? I haven't had a drink for over two days. Well, except for the windshield wiper fluid... hold it, how in the world does a snake talk? Are you real? Are you some sort of Disney animation?"
"No," says the snake, "I'm real. As real as you or anyone is, anyway. I didn't give you a drink. I bit you. That's how it works, it's what I do. I bite. Plus I don't have hands to give you a drink, even if I had water just sitting around here."
The man sat stunned for a minute. Here he was, sitting in the middle of the desert on some strange stone that should be hot but wasn't, talking to a snake that could talk back and had just bitten him. And he felt better. Not great - he was still starving and exhausted, but much better - he was no longer thirsty. He had started to sweat again, but only slightly. He felt hot, in this sun, but it was starting to get lower in the sky, and the cool stone beneath him was a relief he could notice now that he was no longer dying of thirst.
"I might suggest that we take care of that methanol you now have in your system with the next request," continued the snake. "I can guess why you drank it, but I'm not sure how much you drank, or how much methanol was left in the wiper fluid. That stuff is nasty. It'll make you go blind in a day or two, if you drank enough of it."
"Ummm, n-next request?" said the man. He put his hand back on his hurting shoulder and backed away from the snake a little.
"That's the way it works. If you like, that is," explained the snake. "You get three requests. Call them wishes, if you wish." The snake grinned at his own joke, and the man drew back a little further from the show of fangs.
"But there are rules," the snake continued. "The first request is free. The second requires an agreement of secrecy. The third requires the binding of responsibility." The snake looks at the man seriously.
"By the way," the snake says suddenly, "my name is Nathan. Old Nathan, Samuel used to call me. He gave me the name. Before that, most of the Bound used to just call me 'Snake'. But that got old, and Samuel wouldn't stand for it. He said that anything that could talk needed a name. He was big into names. You can call me Nate, if you wish." Again, the snake grinned. "Sorry if I don't offer to shake, but I think you can understand - my shake sounds somewhat threatening." The snake give his rattle a little shake.
"Umm, my name is Jack," said the man, trying to absorb all of this. "Jack Samson."
"Can I ask you a question?" Jack says suddenly. "What happened to the venom...umm, in your bite. Why aren't I dying now? How did you do that? What do you mean by that's how you work?"
"That's more than one question," grins Nate. "But I'll still try to answer all of them. First, yes, you can ask me a question." The snake's grin gets wider. "Second, the venom is in you. It changed you. You now no longer need to drink. That's what you asked for. Or, well, technically, you asked to not be thirsty any more - but 'any more' is such a vague term. I decided to make it permanent - now, as long as you live, you shouldn't need to drink much at all. Your body will conserve water very efficiently. You should be able to get enough just from the food you eat - much like a creature of the desert. You've been changed.
"For the third question," Nate continues, "you are still dying. Besides the effects of that methanol in your system, you're a man - and men are mortal. In your current state, I give you no more than about another 50 years. Assuming you get out of this desert, alive, that is." Nate seemed vastly amused at his own humor, and continued his wide grin.
"As for the fourth question," Nate said, looking more serious as far as Jack could tell, as Jack was just now working on his ability to read talking-snake emotions from snake facial features, "first you have to agree to make a second request and become bound by the secrecy, or I can't tell you."
"Wait," joked Jack, "isn't this where you say you could tell me, but you'd have to kill me?"
"I thought that was implied." Nate continued to look serious.
"Ummm...yeah." Jack leaned back a little as he remembered again that he was talking to a fifteen foot venomous reptile with a reputation for having a nasty temper. "So, what is this 'Bound by Secrecy' stuff, and can you really stop the effects of the methanol?" Jack thought for a second. "And, what do you mean methanol, anyway? I thought these days they use ethanol in wiper fluid, and just denature it?"
"They may, I don't really know," said Nate. "I haven't gotten out in a while. Maybe they do. All I know is that I smell methanol on your breath and on that bottle in your pocket. And the blue color of the liquid when you pulled it out to drink some let me guess that it was wiper fluid. I assume that they still color wiper fluid blue?"
"Yeah, they do," said Jack.
"I figured," replied Nate. "As for being bound by secrecy - with the fulfillment of your next request, you will be bound to say nothing about me, this place, or any of the information I will tell you after that, when you decide to go back out to your kind. You won't be allowed to talk about me, write about me, use sign language, charades, or even act in a way that will lead someone to guess correctly about me. You'll be bound to secrecy. Of course, I'll also ask you to promise not to give me away, and as I'm guessing that you're a man of your word, you'll never test the binding anyway, so you won't notice." Nate said the last part with utter confidence.
Jack, who had always prided himself on being a man of his word, felt a little nervous at this. "Ummm, hey, Nate, who are you? How did you know that? Are you, umm, omniscient, or something?"
Well, Jack," said Nate sadly, "I can't tell you that, unless you make the second request." Nate looked away for a minute, then looked back.
"Umm, well, ok," said Jack, "what is this about a second request? What can I ask for? Are you allowed to tell me that?"
"Sure!" said Nate, brightening. "You're allowed to ask for changes. Changes to yourself. They're like wishes, but they can only affect you. Oh, and before you ask, I can't give you immortality. Or omniscience. Or omnipresence, for that matter. Though I might be able to make you gaseous and yet remain alive, and then you could spread through the atmosphere and sort of be omnipresent. But what good would that be - you still wouldn't be omniscient and thus still could only focus on one thing at a time. Not very useful, at least in my opinion." Nate stopped when he realized that Jack was staring at him.
"Well, anyway," continued Nate, "I'd probably suggest giving you permanent good health. It would negate the methanol now in your system, you'd be immune to most poisons and diseases, and you'd tend to live a very long time, barring accident, of course. And you'll even have a tendency to recover from accidents well. It always seemed like a good choice for a request to me."
"Cure the methanol poisoning, huh?" said Jack. "And keep me healthy for a long time? Hmmm. It doesn't sound bad at that. And it has to be a request about a change to me? I can't ask to be rich, right? Because that's not really a change to me?"
"Right," nodded Nate.
"Could I ask to be a genius and permanently healthy?" Jack asked, hopefully.
"That takes two requests, Jack."
"Yeah, I figured so," said Jack. "But I could ask to be a genius? I could become the smartest scientist in the world? Or the best athlete?"
"Well, I could make you very smart," admitted Nate, "but that wouldn't necessarily make you the best scientist in the world. Or, I could make you very athletic, but it wouldn't necessarily make you the best athlete either. You've heard the saying that 99% of genius is hard work? Well, there's some truth to that. I can give you the talent, but I can't make you work hard. It all depends on what you decide to do with it."
"Hmmm," said Jack. "Ok, I think I understand. And I get a third request, after this one?"
"Maybe," said Nate, "it depends on what you decide then. There are more rules for the third request that I can only tell you about after the second request. You know how it goes." Nate looked like he'd shrug, if he had shoulders.
"Ok, well, since I'd rather not be blind in a day or two, and permanent health doesn't sound bad, then consider that my second request. Officially. Do I need to sign in blood or something?"
"No," said Nate. "Just hold out your hand. Or heel." Nate grinned. "Or whatever part you want me to bite. I have to bite you again. Like I said, that's how it works - the venom, you know," Nate said apologetically.
Jack winced a little and felt his shoulder, where the last bite was. Hey, it didn't hurt any more. Just like Nate had said. That made Jack feel better about the biting business. But still, standing still while a fifteen foot snake sunk it's fangs into you. Jack stood up. Ignoring how good it felt to be able to stand again, and the hunger starting to gnaw at his stomach, Jack tried to decide where he wanted to get bitten. Despite knowing that it wouldn't hurt for long, Jack knew that this wasn't going to be easy.
"Hey, Jack," Nate suddenly said, looking past Jack towards the dunes behind him, "is that someone else coming up over there?"
Jack spun around and looked. Who else could be out here in the middle of nowhere? And did they bring food?
Wait a minute, there was nobody over there. What was Nate...
Jack let out a bellow as he felt two fangs sink into his rear end, through his jeans...
Jack sat down carefully, favoring his more tender buttock. "I would have decided, eventually, Nate. I was just thinking about it. You didn't have to hoodwink me like that."
"I've been doing this a long time, Jack," said Nate, confidently. "You humans have a hard time sitting still and letting a snake bite you - especially one my size. And besides, admit it - it's only been a couple of minutes and it already doesn't hurt any more, does it? That's because of the health benefit with this one.
submitted by moe_master to copypasta [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 04:25 duellingislands 5:05 EEST; The Sun is Rising Over Kyiv on the 459th Day of the Full-Scale Invasion. This week's entry in our series on Ukrainian Recipes is Ryazhanka, a traditional and still very popular baked cultured drink. + Discussion + Charities

5:05 EEST; The Sun is Rising Over Kyiv on the 459th Day of the Full-Scale Invasion. This week's entry in our series on Ukrainian Recipes is Ryazhanka, a traditional and still very popular baked cultured drink. + Discussion + Charities

🇺🇦 Слава Україні! 🇺🇦

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Another entry in our series on Ukrainian cuisine! Previous entries:
Borshch Varenyky Salo Syrniki Korovai Horilka Pampushky Banosh Hrechanyky Kyivskyi Cake Makivnyk Vyshnyak Drunken Cherry Cake Varenukha Pumpkin Porridge Lazy Varenyky Holubtsi Kolach Kvas Christmas Borshch Uzvar Kutya Beetroot Salad Kapusnyak Nalysnyk Bublyk Deruny Wild Mushroom Sauce Yavorivskyi Pie Spring Dough Birds Kholodets Easter Bread (Babka/Paska) Khrin & Tsvikli Shpundra Teterya Green Borshch Kalatusha Elderflower Kvas Crimean Tatar Chebureky
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Ryazhanka

Ryazhanka made using a mason jar method. Photo: New York Times.
Today we will cover a drink that is not so internationally popular (yet!) but has potential for crossover stardom. It’s called Ryazhanka, and for many Ukrainians, it's a staple found in the refrigerator year-round. If you visit a Ukrainian store, you will likely find no shortage of brands that aim to dazzle you with their hearty yet refreshing drink.
Ryazhanka is a baked cultured milk drink that is traditional in Ukraine and Belarus. Its taste is sweet and super creamy and not quite sour - the tanginess from the fermentation gives it just a little kick.
It's also a very old drink. It is well recorded that during the era of Kyivan Rus, people made Ryazhanka in the Pich (the traditional Ukrainian oven). They would heat up milk and cream at high temperatures (but without bringing to a full boil!) until they acquired a nice caramelized color.
While on some level I do believe that our old pal Domovyk must of course be involved in the process of crafting Ryazhanka, I have also read in some sciencey places that during the baking process, milk proteins interact with the sugars in milk resulting in the formation of a new substance - melanoidins. Maybe Domovyk’s powers include control over high molecular weight heterogeneous polymers. :) Anyway, just like some other cooked dairy products (like ultra-pasteurized milk or ghee), melanoidins seem happy to provide the unique color of Ryazhanka. And of course, they impart a quite pleasant taste! To seal the deal, a little sour cream was traditionally added to the Ryazhanka after baking and with time the milk would ferment, adding another interesting element to the drink.
This stabilized drink of course allowed humans to preserve milk for a little longer before it went bad when civilization had not come up with refrigerators just yet; if you’ve been following this series, you’ll understand that Ukrainian cuisine is all about fermentation and preservation! And it's also worth mentioning that in a pinch, the rich and nutritious Ryazhanka could be a substitute for a meal, especially on a hot day, adding to its appeal.
Note: I am positive that you can find Ukrainian Ryazhanka in stores that carry brands from Eastern Europe, although I want to mention that regretfully the orcs developed their own knockoff brands so be careful and look for the country of origin on the label! And as we do not want you to support the war machine or get poisoned (are you sure Novichok is only in tea?), we’ll tell you how to make it at home!
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How to Make Ryazhanka (With or Without Domovyk’s Help)

To prepare Ryazhanka, you will need only two ingredients!
Ingredients
  • Milk (full fat, as fresh as possible) - 3 Liters
  • Plain whole milk Kefir - 4 Tbsp
    • Note: It is traditional to use sour cream, but I worry that for the purposes of this recipe all international sour cream might not have the right cultures in it to be able to kick off the process, whereas Kefir probably does. Substitute same volume for sour cream or you could try full fat active culture Greek Yogurt.
Recipe
  1. When fermenting, it’s really important that you make sure the equipment you use (pots including lids, spoons, etc.) are super clean.
  2. Pour the milk into a pan, and bring it to a near boil. Don’t let it actually boil because it could scald and ruin the taste - just get it to look like it’s threatening to boil. Leave it at this temperature for about 5 minutes. At the same time, it is important to really monitor the milk so it does not spill over the edge. Periodically stirring it helps.
  3. Heat oven to 150°C.
  4. Pour the milk into a vessel that can be used in the oven. Best is a nice ceramic pot.
  5. Place the pot with the milk in the oven and gently simmer for between 3 and 4 hours. Do not cover it with a lid.
  6. At this point a coffee-colored foam will appear on the surface if it has caramelized properly - it is now baked milk! Take it out of the oven and wait until it cools down to around 40°C. Very important to wait until cool because otherwise the heat will kill the helpful little fermentation guys in the next steps.
  7. You can remove the foam or leave it. [Ed. note: I leave it so I am not sure the difference exactly - if anyone knows, please tell us in the comments!]
  8. Pour a small amount of milk into the Kefir (or your substitute) and stir until smooth. Then pour this small amount of mixture back into the larger pot of baked milk.
  9. Cover the pot with a lid and then wrap it in a blanket, or towel, to retain heat. Leave in a warm place for at least 8 hours - it should become thick. You can keep it in this warm state for up to 24 hours, depending on the temperature of your warm place and desired thickness. I feel just a little bit dirty typing that.
  10. You can drink it right away after it has reached its desired thickness, but in summertime I recommend chilling it first! It can be poured into jars, and keeps for about a week in the refrigerator.
Tips
  • 1 liter of milk yields approximately 700 ml of Ryazhanka.
  • There is an alternative mason jar version of the recipe where you pour it into the jars after Step 8. In this case, you must absolutely boil the jars to sterilize them. Then use a coffee filter and an elastic band to cover them while you wait for fermentation.
  • You can use Ryazhanka for the same applications you would use yogurt for, but Ryazhanka is naturally much sweeter.
  • Try adding Ryazhanka to smoothies to fortify them in a creamy way - or substitute for milk when making pancakes to lend a more velvety texture. Sometimes Ryazhanka is used when making fancy baked desserts!
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The 459th day of a nine year invasion that has been going on for centuries.
One day closer to victory.

🇺🇦 HEROYAM SLAVA! 🇺🇦

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Verified Charities

  • u/Jesterboyd is a mod for ukraine and local to Kyiv. He is currently selling t-shirts raising money to buy some very interesting drones. Link to donation
  • United24: This site was launched by President Zelenskyy as the main venue for collecting charitable donations in support of Ukraine. Funds will be allocated to cover the most pressing needs facing Ukraine.
  • Come Back Alive: This NGO crowdfunds non-lethal military equipment, such as thermal vision scopes & supplies it to the front lines. It also provides training for Ukrainian soldiers, as well as researching troops’ needs and social reintegration of veterans.
  • Trident Defense Initiative: This initiative run by former NATO and UA servicemen has trained and equipped thousands of Ukrainian soldiers.
  • Ukraine Front Line US-based and registered 501(c)(3), this NGO fulfills front line soldiers' direct defense and humanitarian aid requests through their man on the ground, Ukraine's own u/jesterboyd.
  • Ukraine Aid Ops: Volunteers around the world who are helping to find and deliver equipment directly to those who need it most in Ukraine.
  • Hospitallers: This is a medical battalion that unites volunteer paramedics and doctors to save the lives of soldiers on the frontline. They crowdfund their vehicle repairs, fuel, and medical equipment.
  • Humanity: Co-founded by u/kilderov, Humanity is a small team of volunteers securing and distributing humanitarian aid to the most vulnerable populations in temporarily occupied Kherson Oblast. Kilderov and his friends were under occupation in Nova Kakhovka in 2022.
You can find many more charities with diverse areas of focus in our vetted charities list HERE.
submitted by duellingislands to ukraine [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 03:31 Gabeed Bioware Really Needs to Pump the Brakes on the Anthropomorphization of Aliens

It seems like more and more posts and comments show up on here these days (and indeed have shown up for a couple years) clamoring for the ability to play as an alien in ME4. Obviously some of this derives from the ME3 multiplayer, but given it being a relatively recent trend, I think Andromeda might be partially if not largely to blame here--all the "weirder" aliens like the elcor and hanar got left out of the game, and the more "normal" aliens were ubiquitous, and acted entirely human when you talked with them. Vetra, for example, was a turian, but seemed effectively human to me. Her main conflict in Andromeda was her dealing with being a "big sister" in a manner which revealed absolutely nothing to me about turian childhood, or how it differed from human childhood. An opportunity was missed. Peebee, who was an alien from another part of the galaxy and was at least 100 years old, often acted like a human teenager, and jokingly and anthropomorphically stated that her name meant "peanut butter." Drack was defined by being really old in a rather generic way. And so on. Really the only interesting detail I can think of regarding the Tempest crew where one's species is a factor (outside of Jaal, of course) is with Kallo, whose salarian eidetic memory informed how he felt about the changes that Gil kept making to the Tempest. That was great, and the game needed a lot more of that.
Compare this context to ME1, when aliens were not nearly as anthromorphized as they have since become. Turians were constantly illustrating the novelty of human colloquialisms which reflected a context of alien culture and human culture just starting to mix with one another after a couple decades of contact. Thus Loriq Qu'in said that "a fly in the lotion" was a "charming human expression," and when Garrus warned that Saren was up to something he said "as you humans say, I can feel it in my gut." Most of the asari had ethereal, breathy sounding voices (Dr. Iallis on Noveria being one of the few exceptions that comes to mind), and they could usually be discerned aurally from human females in the game. Contempt towards humans is common, whether it be Wrex in Chora's Den saying, "Out of my way, human, I have no quarrel with you," or Councilor Sparatus' behavior when dealing with Shepard, or even Saren's outright loathing of humanity. All of this gave a sense of the Mass Effect universe being a massive and varied galaxy, full of a vast assortment of aliens who differed from humans in ways beyond the merely physical. They had different perspectives and biases and behaviors because they grew up and lived in societies which were incredibly different from our own. And humans weren't the default or the standard. They were newcomers, and while we've been through four games of the series now, within the chronology of the games they're still the newcomers.
To some people, this distinction in anthromorphization may not seem important. After all, Mass Effect is very much in Star Trek territory, genre-wise, where the aliens start out being rather anthromorphized already. It's not like they're the heptapods from Arrival, or the hamadryads from Chasm City, or something. I want to make clear that I know that a modicum of anthromorphization is what Mass Effect is all about in the first place.
But the Mass Effect series has increased the anthropomorphization of aliens over time, with Andromeda being the most recent example, and it will suffer as a franchise if its aliens are merely palette swaps--humans who happen to look like krogan or salarians. The worldbuilding will suffer, in other words, if humans are effectively indistinguishable in behavior and upbringing from aliens. Sci-fi is compelling because it has the ability to immerse us in strange worlds ripe with danger and conflict, and to uncork strange wonders. It's hard to do that when the various alien species are rendered down to the utterly mundane--the default human experience. ME4 can address this in a ton of different ways, including finally having a batarian crew member (or volus, or hanar, or elcor, etc etc.), but what I hope they don't do is merely continuing the trend of homogenizing the Milky Way species--or, for that matter, homogenizing the writing to such an extent that the protagonist could be human or alien.
submitted by Gabeed to masseffect [link] [comments]

2023.05.28 00:01 FightingUrukHai The People of Aluwa

The people of Aluwa, called the ani’Aluwa in the gla’Aluwa language, first appear in the archeological record in subtle signs. New tools appear, improvements on old methods of fishing and farming. Images of uncertain meaning but familiar feeling are carved into and painted onto the walls of caves. Goods from distant lands are found, indicating the birth of an extensive trade network. In Aluwa oral tradition, this was a time of legend, when monsters swam through flooded forests, stars danced in the sky and changed their patterns, and men intermarried with spirits to birth mighty heroes. Scientifically speaking, the emergence of the ani’Aluwa onto the world stage seems to have been somewhat less dramatic – an intermingling of the peoples of the coast and the peoples of the river, who shared their knowledge and their resources and thus created a new society, able to outcompete their less stable or prosperous neighbors.
Geography
Aluwa is positioned near the center of Horea, with the colder forests of Tritonea to the north, the dry steppes of Xanthea to the west, and the warmer jungles of Gorgonea to the south and east. This central location is mirrored in its people, made up of shared Gorgonean, Tritonean, and Xanthean ancestry. The Aluwa heartland lies on the north coast of the Gorgonean inland sea that the ani’Aluwa call Iteha, with their greatest population density lying along the banks of the Plombalo River. The climate is warm, with hot summers, mild winters, and distinct springs and autumns. Most of the land is covered in oak forests, with mesquite, hickory, sycamore, elm, and cedar trees also common. Toward the west, the tree cover begins to peter out into open prairie.
Food
The ani’Aluwa of this time, as throughout history, got most of their sustenance through a combination of fishing and agriculture, although they also continued more ancient practices of hunting and gathering. Traditionally, agriculture was handled by women, while men went out to hunt, gather, and fish. Agriculture was primarily focused on the intercropped three sisters of corn, beans, and squash, but peppers, sweet potatoes, cassava, and even turkeys had been brought in by trade with more southerly Gorgonean peoples. Their farms lay along the Plombalo and other, smaller rivers that water Aluwa, or further afield raised up among basic irrigation canals. The Aluwa women worked with mattocks and sickles, along with the new invention of hoes. Many of these tools, especially the hoes, had their cutting edges made of sharp clam or whelk shells, a sign of the interdependence of the riverine and coastal Aluwa communities. Others were made of flint, which is common in the area. Only a very few tools of any sort were made of copper or bronze. Although the ani’Aluwa had learned the techniques of bronze smelting in domed and pit ovens from their Gorgonean trade partners, as well as how to anneal and cold-work bronze into desired shapes, they had no significant ore deposits of copper, tin, or any other useful metal and so had to trade for any metal tools.
While the women stayed in the village growing their crops and raising their turkeys, the men journeyed out to gather food from the wild. The main animal hunted was the white-tailed deer, which provided not only meat but hides. On a smaller scale, rabbits, quail, ducks, geese, and doves were also hunted. Their usual weapon used in hunts was the atlatl, throwing spears with the same flint and seashell points as their farming implements. The men would also gather wild nuts and fruits – pecans, acorns, chestnuts, walnuts, strawberries, elderberries, pawpaws, and persimmons. One of Aluwa’s more notable innovations was their use of grafting to increase the productivity of nut- and fruit-bearing trees. Even more notable was their knowledge of herbalism. Specially trained wise men, taught the secrets of herblore, would search out medicinal plants to heal the sick and, in the case of the psychotropic mountain laurel, to commune with the spirits.
In every village, whether on a river or the coast, fishing was a fundamental source of sustenance. Inland, men would use a combination of drop nets and sunken basket traps to fish up bass, catfish, sunfish, gar, and walleye, as well as crawfish. On the coast, they would use similar techniques to catch trout, redfish, and flounders, along with shrimp, snails, crabs, and lobsters. Clams and oysters would be gathered simply by digging in the sand of the beaches. The biggest fish swam in deeper waters, though, and the ani’Aluwa would have to get on their plank boats and set out to sea. There they would use specially designed harpoons to spear snappers, groupers, and tuna.
Once it had been gathered, the food would be prepared in ways reminiscent of later Aluwa recipes. Using the readily available lime, corn would be nixtamalized into hominy. Both meats and vegetables would be smoke cured to improve both taste and imperishability. Some of the earliest Aluwa dishes consisted of combinations of different kinds of fish smoked with different kinds of wood, each providing a unique flavor.
Lifestyle
Due to the warm climate of Aluwa, and the protective forest canopy that shielded its inhabitants from the sun, the ani’Aluwa tended not to need much clothing. The only covering decency required, and the only thing most people wore, was a short skirt for men or a loincloth for women. These would be woven out of fibers from the fronds of palms that grew along the coast. In the winter, people would cover themselves with warmer deerskin pants and shirts – winters were mild and snow was rare, but it still did get cold enough to be uncomfortable in nothing but a loincloth.
The early ani’Aluwa were great workers of wood, chopping down trees with simple adzes and using their basic carpentry knowledge to craft wigwam-like houses out of flexible young saplings covered in bark. Their villages consisted of many such houses, surrounded by farmland cleared out of the forest. The villages were thought of as a feminine space, governed by matrilineal elders, while the wilderness was a masculine space, inhabited only by wandering hunter-gatherers. Traditionally, when a boy reached maturity, he would leave his home village behind, joining a new village where he would find a wife to marry (intratribal marriages being taboo).
Little is known about early Aluwa spirituality. Followers of Ahiye will declare that it is the oldest religion in the world, worshipped by the first humans, but there is little archeological evidence for much of the religion’s practices at this time. Some facets of Ahiye are definitely present, however. Religious objects, including those of distinctly female figures, have been found on hills and manmade mounds of dirt or stone, indicating belief in some sort of female sky deity. Similarly, carvings and objects with masculine characteristics are found in caves, suggesting a mirrored male earth deity. In places without natural caves, the ani’Aluwa would build artificial “caves” out of limestone blocks, often brought in from miles away – an example of their knowledge of basic masonry, even if they preferred wood in their other constructions. However, it seems that at the time the reverence of local spirits was more important to the ani’Aluwa, with many small shrines devoted to trees and landmarks being scattered across the land.
Many of the mystical symbols found in ancient Aluwa sacred places mirror the patterns of the constellations. Some of the earliest myths of the ani’Aluwa were linked to these constellations they drew. These symbols have also been found on early plank boats, indicating that the ani’Aluwa were not just looking to the sky for spiritual guidance, but for physical guidance as they sailed the sea of Iteha. This celestial navigation technique allowed Aluwa ships to venture out of sight of shore, certain of their position, enabling them to travel long distances in search of fish or trade partners.
A Note on gla’Aluwa Pronunciation
In the gla’Aluwa language, stress always lands on the third-to-last syllable, unless the word is less than three syllables long (in which case stress is on the first syllable) or an accent mark is present (in which case stress is on the accented syllable). Most root words are three syllables long, with prefixes being added to modify them. The vowels are pronounced as in Spanish; the consonants are mostly the same as in the IPA with a handful of exceptions: y is pronounced as in English, dh represents the soft th sound as in ‘the’, and ‘ is used for a glottal stop. The sound of ng is as in English, but doesn’t have a hard g at the end – it’s pronounced like in ‘hanger’, not ‘anger’. If the sound in ‘anger’ is needed, the next syllable will start with a g, as in the gla’Alawa word ‘Bonggabo’ (meaning ‘rabbit’). gla’Aluwa speakers consider bl, pl, gl, and kl to be single letters, but they are still pronounced like the two letters in their Latin alphabet digraph.
Starting Technologies:
Key Tech: Celestial Navigation
Major Techs: Drop Nets, Herbalism
Minor Techs: Hoes, Grafting, Fishing Trap: Sunken Basket Trap, Harpoons, Smoke Curing
submitted by FightingUrukHai to DawnPowers [link] [comments]

2023.05.27 23:59 ShadowDragon88 I've Been Reincarnated as a Bunny Girl?! Ch. 4

YAY! Chapter 4 already done and ready for posting! WOOO! I really hope that you enjoy it, dear readers!
I've Been Reincarnated as a Bunny Girl?! (Chapter 4)
by
ShadowDragon88
"I love when the merchant caravan comes to town!" Valay cheered from where he was sitting on Kiana's shoulders, making his soon-to-be sixteen-year-old big sister wince. At age nine, the twins were being accompanied by Kiana as they walked through main street in town. Twice a year the merchant caravan, often accompanied by adventurers or mercenaries as guards, came to Starlight Rose. Ever since the destruction of The Spire, the town had started to see more traffic as travelers no longer had to worry about traveling through the narrow gaps in the mountain range, past a source of evil. In the six years since its destruction, Starlight Rose had bloomed and doubled its population.
​
Walking past the stalls and the games, Kiana smiled, feeling a festive atmosphere. She looked down at Malay, who was wearing a seafoam green dress, the young wolbet not caring that it had been a hand-me-down from Kiana, and clutching a giant blue stuffed fox almost as big as she was. Kiana was wearing a bright yellow sundress, having stated that on such a warm day, it was the best option to help keep from getting overheated. Her mother and sister had both smiled knowingly, not the least bit tricked by Kiana's professions. Kiana would often just not think about it.
​
Valay, in contrast, was wearing a simple red shirt and brown shorts and some small stick-on bandages on his shins and knees. The young boy wolbet was holding a purple dragon plush. Kiana had won them from a game booth. It was the classic 'throw a ball at a stack of bottles to knock them over' game, and like a cliche, she had seen her little brother throw a ball, hit the stack in the dead center, and they didn't move an inch. That's when big sister had stepped in. Kiana looked back at the booth... or rather where it had been. The attendant was still standing there, staring in a daze, as only half of the structure still remained.
​
"I'm glad you two like it," Kiana said, picking her brother up off her shoulders and setting him down next to his twin. Mirabelle rubbed up against his leg, making him giggle. The tiny snake, that had been small enough to sit coiled comfortably in the palm of a younger Kiana's hand, was now the size of a Saint Barnard, and just as affectionate as one. The blue-green snake had a tendency to try and sneak food, mainly cookies, when she thought she could get away with it, and had developed quite the set of sad puppy eyes when caught.
​
"So Kiana," Malay asked, looking up with her forest green eyes, a twinkle in them, "gunna go meet with Davtio later?"
​
Kiana smiled and rolled her eyes. Malay loved asking Kiana about her love life, or rather lack thereof. The older girl reached over and ruffled her little sister's headfur.
​
"Davtio and I are just friends," she said, having the day before gone on a walk with the elf-boy from her graduating class, gently letting him down after he had made his courting intentions known. The day after Kiana's birthday, which would be two days after the biannual festival, she was going to be leaving Starlight Rose to become a traveling adventurer. Davtio, with his long and practically glowing golden locks and eyes the color of the deep blue sea, had been disappointed, but he understood.
​
Jorba the goblin boy, however, had been far less formal as well as far less respectful with his own declaration. Said green-skinned bat-eared boy had walked over to where Kiana was retying her new forest green boots and given her bottom a swat, just below her cotton tail, puffing out his chest and informing Kiana that he had decided she was the finest female in their age group in the town and therefore, will be his woman. Slowly, Kiana had straightened herself and turned around, her eyes glowing with a blue light. With a swipe of her legs and a downward punch, that Kiana had been careful not to be too hard with, she effectively punched the disgusting goblin, literally, into the ground. Still alive and not crippled, but definitely in a lot of pain.
​
"I know that he liiiiiikes you, though," Malay said, rocking back and forth on her heels, reaching down to stroke Mirabelle's head, making the large reptile loosely wrap herself around the young wolbet girl's ankles.
​
"I don't feel the same way and I told him as much, so we've agreed to remain friends," Kiana said, making her sister let out an exasperated sigh.
​
"GAH! That is so just like you, Kiki!" Malay said, using the name she and Valay had called Kiana shortly after they had first learned how to talk. "Someone likes you, but you're just happy being just friends!"
​
"Hey, friends are awesome to have," Kiana said, picking Malay up and setting her on her shoulders, taking Valay's hand/paw into her own. Malay just rolled her eyes and continued to hug her fox.
​
"So," Valay piped up, glad that the girls had quit talking about romance stuff, "whatcha gunna buy with the money you saved up?" Valay was speaking of the jingling pouch of coins on Kiana's hip. She had earned extra coin around town doing things like babysitting and helping Mr. Fresto build a new stone wall around his garden, and the like. Making deliveries for the new offta restaurant in town had been fun for the teen bunny, and not because offta was the name for what turned out to be pizza in this world either! Tapping into her powers, she was able to sprint all across town and even over to Lake Phantom and back, often in under a minute.
​
"Well, I've already bought a bunch of supplies and a pack for my journey," Kiana said, taking note of Valay's ears drooping a bit, as well as sensing that Malay's ears were probably doing the same.
​
"So... you really mean to leave?" Malay asked from Kiana's shoulders. Kiana smiled and rubbed her little sister's leg, before rubbing her little brother's head.
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"Yeah, I really do. But like I've told papa... repeatedly, actually, I'll come back to visit a whole bunch! And I'll be able to tell you all some cool stories about my travels!" Kiana said, brightening their moods.
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"Are you going to learn magic?" Malay asked. As the twins edged closer towards their tenth birthday, that meant that they were nearing when they'd be old enough to take an exam to determine their magical abilities. Malay had accidentally turned a handful of flowers to stone when she sneezed at age seven. She also accidentally set a patch of grass on fire just outside her bedroom window after a bad dream a couple months back. According to a very excited Felixin, these were signs that Malay had a high aptitude for magic, and might actually be a sorceress, someone born with raw magical power within them.
​
Felixin went on to explain that anyone, with study and practice and skill, could eventually learn to use magic, but people like that fell under the category of a wizard. He went on to explain that witches were similar to wizards, but were more like hippies out dancing in the woods. Sorcerers and sorceresses were born with raw magical power already in them, that as they grew older, they needed to learn how to control, lest it become dangerous to them and those around them.
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Druids, he continued with his explanation, were similar to witches, but less studious and more concentrating on attuning themselves to the energies of the surrounding natural world. He also said they had a tendency to eat certain mushrooms and fungus that they claimed could open one's third eye, but her father dismissed that notion as them just being addled by the chemicals in said fungi. Clerics were also magical, but their magic derived from whichever god they'd devoted themselves to, much like paladins, but with more study and significantly less combat training.
​
Finally, there were warlocks. Felixin was not shy about making his feelings regarding warlocks known. Instead of taking the time to learn and practice and concentrate and actually earn their magical power, they were rare people who instead bound themselves to an entity of great magical power, often something very sinister. In exchange for this power, they would do their new master's bidding, oftentimes not even fully understanding why such entities would want such requests done. He even recounted one warlock whose only task was to go out on the road and find a specific boulder, and then move it three inches south. Said warlock just shrugged when asked why, and stated that it was the only task his master ever asked of him.
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What Felixin apparently didn't know was that there was a final category. The monk. When the master dragon monk had come to evaluate Kiana, after he had recovered from his shock, he had explained that monks were ordinary people who trained both their minds and their bodies. They would learn to tap into their inner power, their ki, and harness it through their bodies. This was of course after years and years of training and meditation. Of the different kinds of monks, the dragon monks were the most powerful. Once they passed a certain threshold, they would become as powerful as a dragon; which kind of dragon depended on which advanced school of training they most identified with. According to the master, Kiana practically oozed the aura of a storm dragon, which was capable of moving as fast as lightning.
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"Kiki!" Valay called, tugging on Kiana's hand. She shook herself and smiled down at the wolbet boy. Kiana looked up in time to see Mirabelle stealthily reaching up at a nearby picnic table where those sitting weren't paying any attention and was trying to drag a plate with an entire rotisserie chicken on it nearer to the edge. She snapped her finger, making Mirabelle recoil and slither right back over to her legs, making the sad eyes at her. Kiana ignored the big orange orbs with the black slits and returned her attention to her brother.
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"Sorry, buddy, I guess I got lost in my memories there for a sec."
​
The boy rolled his eyes and pointed to a large red and white tent that covered a wide area. There were no walls, and plenty of people were milling about inside, looking at the various goods. What had caught Valay's eye were the weapons. Already the boy had begged their mother to teach him swordfighting and, only recently, Pumala had agreed. She took note of how quickly Valay had taken to practicing the basics every day after school, always starting back to stance one. Kiana was certain that he was going to grow up to be quite the fighter.
​
"Okay, let's take a look and see what they've got for sale," Kiana said, turning them to an opening, Mirabelle following close behind. Together they walked down the set up shelves and displays. Valay was entranced by the swords and daggers, especially the throwing knives and shurikens. Scratch that, Kiana thought to herself with a giggle as she set her little sister down to look at the magical staves, thinking about how much Valay loved hiding and planting stink bombs for pranks and using smoke bombs to make his escapes. He'll probably grow up to be a great ninja or something.
​
Keeping her younger siblings and Mirabelle in sight, Kiana started to look through the different weapons. There were plenty made from low-quality materials that would probably break upon the first real usage, including an ornate-looking gold sword encrusted with jewels. She stopped just past the flails and nunchucks, spying several different tetsubos. The tetsubo was a weapon of the ancient samurai, at least that was the case for her home world. They were long, thick wooden clubs, in this case as tall as Kiana was, so around five feet in length. Going down the sides of the weapons, stopping only at the ends at the tops and just before the handles at the bottoms, were rounded or spiked metal rivets.
​
She pushed past some ornately carved ones, and spotted what appeared to be a plain brown tetsubo. It was polished and its rivets were spiked and black. The handle was wrapped in a comfortable-feeling leather. Some instinct deep within her liked this weapon, it liked it very much. Carrying it with one hand, she approached a man wearing a lapis lazuli-colored turban, and some matching lapis with gold trim robes. His skin was a pitch-black, with a shock of long white hair, signifying that he was a dark elf.
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"How much for the tetsubo?" Kiana asked, hearing Valay and Malay hurrying to her side. She could practically feel their wide eyes staring in wonder at the weapon.
​
The merchant smiled, his purple eyes twinkling. "So this is the weapon you have selected? Quite the interesting choice."
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"Uh, thanks?" Kiana said, now looking the tetsubo over and wondering if it was cursed, or if the guy before her was going to turn out to be a demon or something and that every item in the shop was cursed in some karmic way like the old cliche.
​
"It is made from a healthy branch of steelwood. Note that I said made, and not carved. As exquisite as a weapon or armor made from carved steelwood is, it pales in comparison to one that is made with secret techniques to sing the form it was always supposed to be straight from the trees themselves. Doing so ensures that any weapon or armor crafted this way will never dull or break. And the price will, of course, reflect as much..."
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"Ah," Kiana said, understanding what the merchant before her was getting at.
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"That particular tetsubo I cannot part with for less than a platinum," he said.
​
"Sold," Kiana said, pulling open her pouch and jangling it as her hand disappeared inside. After a moment of her rooting around and sifting coins aside, she found what she was looking for. Out she pulled a single platinum coin. Her brother and sister, as well as the merchant, looked at Kiana in shock.
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"Where'd you get a platinum piece?" Malay asked, watching transfixed as Kiana handed the coin over to the still stunned dark elf, who took it and slipped it into a pocket in his robes.
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"I found it just outside of town, when I beat down a giant shambling plant creature-thing. I think it ate a traveling merchant or something, 'cause I found a pouch with ten of them in it," Kiana whispered with a wink. She looked up to see that the merchant had the coin back in his hands and was examining it with a jeweler's loupe, nodding in approval as he pocketed both and gave Kiana an award-winning smile.
​
"A happy transaction," he said, his voice much more jovial than it had been, "please, look around some more for any more weapons that might catch your eye. And please, remember to ask for F'nnickly the Weapon Merchant if ever you're in the cities of Thassles, Ghostflower, or Midnight Tree. I have shops in all of them!"
​
"I certainly will," Kiana said, meaning it. She imagined she would be seeing more of this F'nnickly on her travels. She then turned to her brother and sister and knelt down, while the merchant turned to address another customer. "Alright, you two, did you guys find anything you wanted? I'll buy it for you."
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"But... your birthday money?" Valay asked, looking torn. Kiana gave him and then his twin a kiss on their foreheads.
​
"You're my cute little brother and sister. If I want to spend money on you guys, I will," she said with a warm smile that only grew wider at the sight of the two now sporting excited grins. They both ran off and started to look more earnestly at things that had caught their eyes.
​
"Papa probably won't be too happy with me buying them weapons, but I'm sure he and Mama will teach them how to be responsible with them," she thought. She was still crouched to the twins' level and was about to stand back up, when she spotted something else that caught her eye. It was a pair of seemingly plain polished brass knuckles lying inside a small glass display case on a shelf to her left. They looked to be made of a bright silvery metal. Opening the case and picking them up, they weighed next to nothing, but like the tetsubo, something about them called out to Kiana on a level she couldn't quite identify. Smiling, she stood up with them and tapped F'nnickly on his shoulder.
​
After learning that they were a pair of master-crafted mithril brass knuckles, Kiana bought them for five hundred gold, which was just half of another platinum piece, so she got some change to fill her coin pouch with. Valay was the first to return, carrying a set of shuriken that were enchanted to return to the thrower's hand with a snap of their fingers, a steel dagger, and a chain and sickle that F'nnickly identified as a kusarigama. Kiana had to stop Valay from spinning the weighted end as well as the sickle. Malay returned with a corkscrew oak carved staff that ended with a glowing purple jewel at the top, floating just above the tip. Right below it were human faces carved in, all with sinister-looking grins. It was a swamp dragon staff, meaning that it was great with poison, disease, and paralysis-related spells. With some practice, a dedicated magic user could use it to help with healing very nasty injuries and infections. Together, their purchases ended up costing Kiana another platinum piece plus another fifty gold.
​
Kiana smiled down at her beloved little brother and little sister, seeing their excitement as they marveled at their new equipment. Mirabelle, not understanding just why they were excited, was still wriggling happily nonetheless. Kiana looked around at her town, beyond the merchant booths and the games, looking at all the sights she had grown up again with, feeling a pang of sadness at knowing in two days, she was leaving. She saw all the familiar faces of her neighbors and friends and everyone else in this town she had grown to love. But it was time, and she knew it. And she had meant what she had said, she was going to visit often. Plus, she'd have Mirabelle with her, so she didn't expect she'd feel too homesick.
​
Two Days Later...
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Kiana's travel pack was fully loaded with spare clothes, food, her mithril knuckles, a couple health potions (not that she was expecting to have to use them), a canteen of fresh water, some alchemical flameless torches, some books, other assorted supplies and, when she was certain no one was looking, Mr. Wolfy. She grabbed her tetsubo and looked at her bedroom, smiling at the bookshelf filled with all sorts of titles and books about faraway lands. Her bed was made, the soft pink comforter that made cold winter nights just so warm. Her closet that was closed, containing a bit fewer dresses than it did a couple days ago, with them safely packed away in her bag. Sighing, she exited.
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She was wearing her forest green boots with gold trim up the laces. They matched her green and gold hot pants and matching halter top. Kiana hadn't been too sure about leaving her midriff open like this, exposing her grey back and white tummy, but she had to admit that she had a pretty decent range of movement. And besides, compared to some other female, and some male, adventurers out there wearing what were basically bikinis or lingerie, this was much less revealing.
​
Out in the living room, her family was waiting. Pumala stood there, holding Kiana's platinum star-shaped badge, signifying the girl was a registered adventurer. Valay had asked Kiana about the badge that had been hand-delivered by guildmaster Graval the day before, the human man wishing the new adventurer a happy birthday. Kiana had explained that she was now officially an adventurer, but a freelance adventurer. She then had to explain that the local guild was a branch of the international inter-adventurer guild association. For freelance adventurers, a platinum ranking was the highest ranking they could achieve. If they wished to rank higher, they needed to join an official guild, like Unicorn Riot or Phoenix Phist. Basically, the guild in their town was just for beginners. The bunny girl was considering joining a real guild, but wanted to first travel and do some missions, and then look in on the different guilds and find out which one she would be most comfortable with.
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"Go out there and have an awesome adventure!" Valay said, his voice choking up a bit. He looked away and wiped his eyes before hugging Kiana.
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"Yeah, and be sure to tell us all about the places you go and the things you do!" Malay said, her own eyes moist. Kiana felt the hot prickle of tears at the back of hers and furiously blinked them away as she returned their hugs.
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"Count on it," she said with a smile. The two letting go, Pumala stepped forward and pinned the badge on Kiana's halter top, her own eyes misty.
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"I'm so proud of you, honey-bunny," she said, now doing the hugging. Kiana hugged back, having to blink away some tears again.
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"I love you, Mama," she said, being kissed on her forehead.
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"I love you too, baby," Pumala said. The older bunny woman, who now had a slight baby bump again, stepped back as her large wolf-man husband strode forward. He tried to look stern, but the silent tears streaming down his face ruined the impression. He threw his arms around Kiana and wrapped her in a bone-crushing hug.
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"Oh, my little princess is going awaaaaaaaaay!" he sobbed, much to everyone's collective embarrassment.
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"I'll be back to visit, Papa," Kiana said, trying to gently pry his arms off.
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"Be careful out there on the road, sweetie!" he sobbed again, his tail tucked between his legs.
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"I will, Papa, I promise." Kiana smiled as he let go, and walked to the door. She turned and waved to her family, before turning back and opening the door. Just after she took her first step, she felt a jolt and something wrap around her right leg. Looking down, she saw her father, clinging to her leg like a toddler.
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"Feli, let go of Kiana's leg right this instant!" Pumala called, while the twins, still saddened by their big sister's departure, shared a giggle at their father's antics.
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"Never!" he called back, tightening his grip. Kiana rolled her eyes and smiled back at her mom.
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"Don't worry, he'll fall off or I'll manage to shake him off before I get to the bridge," she said, starting to walk, albeit with an awkward gait. She whistled and Mirabelle, now sporting a new pink ribbon around her neck, came slithering after. Kiana's friends were near the gate for a send-off, which was made a little awkward by the still sobbing grown wolf clinging to the now mildly annoyed bunny girl's leg. She thanked them all and hugged each one, before stopping at the gate itself. She raised the leg her father was on, and began to shake. After a few moments, Felixin went flying and landed in the dirt with an 'OMPH!' Kiana waited as he got up and dusted himself off, wiping his face with the sleeve of his red robes, and walked over to her.
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"I love you, Princess," he said, looking Kiana in the eyes and forcing a smile, "from the very day you were born, you were always my little princess, and it's just so hard to see you go. But please, know that I love you, and that not only am I already proud of what you've managed to accomplish, but that I know I'll be proud of the things you do out in the world."
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Kiana, fresh tears of her own falling, pulled her Papa into one more hug, now the one making it a bone-crushing hug.
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"I love you, Papa. I'm so lucky that I got to have you and Mama for parents. I'll be back before you know it," she said, wiping her own eyes. Felixin stepped back and continued to smile at his little girl. Kiana smiled back and, snapping her fingers to pull Mirabelle away from a gate guard's unattended bag lunch, the two set off, with Kiana turning back once to wave goodbye, before they finally crossed the bridge, and were on their way out into the wide world.
Name: Kiana
Species: Beasta (Rabbit-Kin)
Age: 16
Skills: Sibling Wrangler, Babysitter, Puppy-Dog Eyes, Master Martial Arts, Brawling, Heavy Weapon Proficiency, Sarcasm Mastery, Eyerolling Mastery, Beast Taming Level 3.
Class: (Official) Master-Level Dragon Monk: Storm Dragon School
Str: 140
Int: 12
Dex: 139
Cha: 12
Wis: 10
Con: 170
Languages: Common
Equipment: Adventurer's Pack, Steelwood Tetsubo, Mastercraft Mithril Knuckles (x2), Rope (25 Ft.), Canteen (Full), Road Rations, Spare Clothes, Bedroll, Health Potion (x2), Books (x3)
Sniffle. And there you have it, folks! I loved writing about Starlight Rose, but now it's time for us, along with Kiana, to explore the wide world! Thanks for reading this new chapter, and be sure to consider leaving a comment or review.
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submitted by ShadowDragon88 to HFY [link] [comments]

2023.05.27 22:47 ElusiveIllusion88 Random Ideas for Future Chapters

Since we are waiting for Chapter 5 to release, just thought of some ideas I think can be implemented in future chapters (other than obvious things like new ingredients).
New Cheeses
The BDP Website (https://bigdatapizza.com/) has pizzas that do not use the regular mozzarella cheese, such as Blue Cheese, Cream Cheese and Cheddar Cheese. Since we have orders that use alternative sauces already, maybe we can have orders that use alternative cheeses instead.
New Topping Type: Sprinkles
Also on the BDP website, some pizzas have sprinkle-type toppings like Parmesan, Rosemary and Red Pepper Flakes. Maybe if we can get these in the future, instead of spotting them onto the pizza like other toppings, they are ‘drawn’ over the pizza like sauce and cheese, except they go on top of all other toppings.
New Upgrade: Morning Service
Self-explanatory: Day starts at, say, 8am instead. With a slight twist that pizzas ordered before 12 noon are biased towards pizzas that contain ‘breakfast toppings’ such as sausage, bacon, ham and eggplant.
Pizzapedia v2
Remember Rufus Goldworthy’s first failed app idea? I am thinking it can be implemented as an actual in-game feature to collate named pizzas that currently do not appear in the recipe book, like Joker Pizza, Ratatouille Pizza, Flammkuchen, Puttanesca Pizza, Bruschetta, Neapolitan Pizza, the Traveller Lady’s orders etc. In-universe, other ovenists are frustrated with customers ordering custom pizzas not on their menus with names like these instead of listing the ingredients (probably like some of us!), which Rufus notices and makes him believe that now is the right time to re-launch his originally failed app idea, especially since he is now so rich and can take the risk.
Zazoom Premium (Taking cues from https://www.reddit.com/GoodPizzaGreatPizza/comments/zri1b8/could_we_get_more_challenging_zazoom_orders/ and https://www.reddit.com/GoodPizzaGreatPizza/comments/rvwukj/potential_zazoom_orders/?context=3)
Once you complete, say, 5 days of perfect Zazoom deliveries in the new Chapter (i.e. all 3 orders completed with perfect pizzas), you are informed of Zazoom’s new loyalty program, and that by completing 5 X days of perfect deliveries, you have accumulated X loyalty points, which entitles you to apply for “Zazoom Silver Tier”. This is an upgrade that you buy, and when active, you get a bigger commission on Zazoom deliveries, a bigger warmer that can hold 10 pizzas, and 4 Zazoom orders per day. The catch is that the potential orders are now pulled from the Pizzapedia (see above) plus your House Special instead of the Recipe Book, meaning more potential types of pizzas to deal with. Also, you need Zazoom Silver Tier to gain loyalty points now, and if you make 2 or more bad Zazoom orders in a day or don’t take any Zazoom orders at all in a day, you lose a loyalty point.
Once you get to reach the next Zazoom loyalty milestone, you are entitled to buy “Zazoom Gold Tier”, which has even bigger commission, an even bigger warmer for 15 pizzas, and 5 Zazoom orders per day. But now not only are Zazoom orders biased towards 2-3 pizzas per order and ‘heavy’ pizzas like Vegetarian, Vegan, Pescatarian and All-Dressed, some pizzas may have modifications like “Meat Lovers +Olives”, “Fruity Pig -Bell Peppers” or “Green Dream +Pesto Sauce”.
Chapter Event: Pandemic Lockdown
Due to a pandemic, you get no walk-in customers during this period. Instead, you have, lets say 9 Zazoom orders to deal with. Similar mechanics as normal Zazoom orders, except once the delivery time comes, you are IMMEDIATELY pulled out of the kitchen to give the pizzas to the delivery person. Also, if you don’t complete at least 3 Zazoom orders, you get a 1-star rating regardless of how good the orders you did complete were (“Why does this Pizzeria even list on Zazoom if they won’t take our order?”), and if you don’t take a single Zazoom order and you already have the “Lazy Day” achievement, you are forced to restart the day.
submitted by ElusiveIllusion88 to GoodPizzaGreatPizza [link] [comments]

2023.05.27 22:34 somerandomguy3355 Clara: Longterm investment, want to hear from whales and experienced players

Hello, I wanted to create a discussion about Clara.
I want to make this clear right now, I think clara is a great and strong character. I am merely playing "Devils Advocate" and thinking of the negatives for longterm investment, and wanted to create a discussion on thoughts or opinions and experiences (especially those who have gotten far in MoC)
I made a comment post and was inspired to make this post, so here goes.
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I think Clara is a great unit, but I worry about her longterm use in the meta and how her viability will actually deteriate with time. Thus far, all content in the game (that isn't a breeze like SU) has a turn limit, our first event rewarding credits and of course MoC 3 stars. This means for longterm investment, so far the game is pointing the direction that clearing in the minimum amount of cycles is basically required.
Now, for those that don't know, Clara's kit revolves around counting the boss when it hits her. Her skill is alright damage (but not the bulk of it), but also requires the boss to be countered to do much damage. Clara is also one of the slowest DPS characters there is, which is sort of good since it means you can skill after the boss attacks a lot of the time.
However, keep in mind there's no way to give the enemy more turns in the game, and thus clara will never be able to increase her attacks per cycle unlike every other dps (mainly hunt).
On prydwen there are parses that simulate characters damage, in a 1v1 scenario clara pulls much less damage then almost every single other unit including 4 star, almost on par with max hp arlan. I understand the simulations say not to use for telling what chars to invest in, but i think it's worth noting how small clara's single target damage truly is.
It's true that most elites will spawn mobs though, usually 1-2 times a fight, and baiting them by leaving them alive and timing ults to aoe the boss is helpful, but due to just how strong clara's aoe is they normally never last more then a turn
What this means is that for most fights, it is a 1v1 95% of the time really, and there is absolutely no way to control the flow of battle to have more mobs or something
The next point I want to point out is being basically forced to use march 7th for consistency. Hopefully this can be remedied in the future, but as it stands clara has to use an entire support slot just to be able to do her damage (which isn't even that great in 1v1), while other characters can use a debuffer or buffer to increase their damage even further. The simulation does not take this into account.
The last point is about the future, as we will potentially get sets in the future or even characters that increase speed further. Increasing speed helps everyone besides clara, as clara actually debenefits from turns (as she does barely any damage with turns and wastes a turn of her ult aggro), while almost every single other dps benefits greatly
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2023.05.27 22:25 EjmMissouri Revelation 1:9-11

Revelation 1:9 I, John, both your brother and companion in the tribulation and kingdom and patience of Jesus Christ, was on the island that is called Patmos for the word of God and for the testimony of Jesus Christ.
When the Roman emperor Domitian (81 - 96 AD) decided to make a big issue about being worshiped as a god, he issued a circular letter which began with the words, “Our Master and our God bids that this be done.” "Our Master and our God" of course being Domitian.
Many Christians got caught up in the persecutions that followed, and the apostle John was no execution. As the story goes, John was sentenced to die by being place in a vat of boiling oil. The emperor himself, desiring to witness the death of the apostle, was present as John was placed into the vat of boiling oil, but to the utter astonishment of everyone - not only did he not die, he was not even hurt. He was delivered just as the three Hebrews were delivered from the flames of the furnace in Daniels day. To say the least, the emperor was somewhat unnerved by this turn of events. But what do you do with a prisoner you can’t kill? You banish him to a tiny island far far way away from Rome. And that is where John now finds himself, on the tiny island of Patmos.
Revelation 1:10 I was in the Spirit on the Lord's Day.
In all the Scripture there is only one day which God has declared to be the Lord’s Day. God is the maker of all days, but there was only one day upon which He has placed His name.
The 7th day Sabbath which comes down to us from Creation week is consistently referred to as the Sabbath of the Lord thy God throughout Scripture. In the heart of the 10 Commandments God declares that “the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD your God.” This day is never anywhere in Scripture referred to as belonging to any other than God. It is never referred to as the Jewish Sabbath, or the Hebrew Sabbath, but only and always as the “Sabbath of the Lord your God.”
In Isaiah God declares this day to be His holy day. "If you turn away your foot from the Sabbath, From doing your pleasure on My holy day, And call the Sabbath a delight, The holy day of the LORD honorable, And shall honor Him, not doing your own ways, Nor finding your own pleasure, Nor speaking your own words, Then you shall delight yourself in the LORD; And I will cause you to ride on the high hills of the earth, And feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father. The mouth of the LORD has spoken." Isaiah 58:13-14.
And in the New Testament Jesus declares that He is the Lord of the Sabbath. "For the Son of Man is Lord even of the Sabbath." Matthew 12:8. (See also Mark 2:28 and Luke 6:5).
In all Scripture there is no other day so identified by God Himself as being His Day, the Lord’s Day. And so we can safely say that it was on the 7th day Sabbath that John saw this vision that we know as the book Revelation.
Revelation 1:10-11 … and I heard behind me a loud voice, as of a trumpet, saying, "I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last," and, "What you see, write in a book and send it to the seven churches which are in Asia: to Ephesus, to Smyrna, to Pergamos, to Thyatira, to Sardis, to Philadelphia, and to Laodicea."
“Alpha and Omega,” one of the symbolic names of Christ - the first and last letters of the Greek alphabet. Just as the alphabet provides an exhaustless medium of expression, so is Jesus and His love an exhaustless theme for meditation. Eternity will be all too short to reveal all the wonders of His love and power. He is the first and the last, the beginning and the end of all things. He is “the author and finisher of our faith,” (Heb 12:2) “the author of eternal salvation.” (Heb 5:9).
“the seven churches“
The number seven is a highly symbolic number in the Bible. It is a symbol of the fullness, the completeness, the wholeness of God’s work. There are seven churches, seven letters, seven stars, seven candlesticks, seven Spirits of God, seven lamps of fire, seven seals, seven trumpets, seven horns, seven eyes, seven thunders, seven heads, seven crowns, seven angels, seven vials, seven mountains, etc. The list goes on and on.
The seven churches mentioned in Revelation were not the only churches in Asia, nor were they the most important. Their selection, however, is deeply significant. The cities where these churches existed lay along the imperial post road. This Roman highway was built about 133 BC. It passed through (in order) Ephesus, Smyrna, Pergamos, Thyatira, Sardis, Philadelphia, and Laodicea, where it joined another main post highway.
Spiritual significance of the churches
And in a book of symbols, it should not be strange that the seven churches themselves are symbols. “And he sent and signified it by his angel unto his servant John.” To signify means to communicate by signs, tokens and symbols. And so, just how do these seven churches stand as symbols? This first prophetic sequence, the seven churches, give the spiritual history of Christianity from John’s day to the second coming of Jesus.
But not just the spiritual history of Christianity as a whole. This prophetic sequence gives one of the clearest examples to be found in the Bible of the multi-layered nature of many prophecies. Consider this. It has been observed by many that not only do the seven churches accurately describe the spiritual condition of Christianity through the ages, (and they do), but it has also been noted that individual denominations go through the same spiritual cycle. And not just denominations, but also individual congregations within a denomination, and on a much more personal level, individual members (that's you and me) of a church often move through this same spiritual cycle -- Starting out on fire for the Lord as was Ephesus but finally ending up with the luke-warm complacency and comfortable religion of Laodicia. At any time in history you will find individuals, congregation and denominations at any one of these stages. The letters however define what the over all prevailing spiritual health of the church was at each stage in its history.
And the message to the churches are spiritual messages. The Spirit is mentioned seven times in the message to the seven churches, once in each period. The holy Spirit, therefore, works through the entire period of the seven churches.
Therefore, the seven Spirits is a symbol of the complete work of the Holy Spirit through the history of the seven churches from the time of John until the second coming of Christ. The Holy Spirit is to be there always through each period to help all in their infirmities (weaknesses) and prayers (Rom 8:26).
And also we find in the letters the complete work of the Holy Spirit in the lives of every individual who has ever called on the name of the Lord. Ultimately, it is on the individual, personal level that the prophecy much be lived. And in one way or another we are all addressed personally in these seven letters. And this very personal application of the prophecy is much more clearly presented and more easily seen in this first prophetic sequence than in the others. But it reminds us that prophecy is more than just mere information. As will be seen when we get to the letters themselves - prophecy is an invitation to come into a closer relationship with God.
submitted by EjmMissouri to bibleprophecy [link] [comments]